The Masks We Must Wear

by Lost Fanfiction

Ever since the start, Ranma and Akane have always been fighting. Constantly stuck in the same rut. Are they ever going to change? Or, perhaps, have they already? (By Bob Barnes. Story published here because all websites it is on have vanished.)

This story was written by Bob Barnes. I am posting it because there is no other easily available website that this story can be read on. If the author of this story wishes to talk to me about the posting of it, contact me using the email in my profile.

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The Masks We Must Wear

Ranma 1/2 Fanfiction by Bob Barnes

PROLOG

The eastern sky was lightening with the first promise of the sun's arrival. The glow began to illuminate the corners of a small bedroom. Lying on a futon along one side of the room was a snoring panda. A young man lying on another futon across the room looked up from the book he was laboring over and snorted derisively at all the noise. 'I guess even "A true marital artist" likes to sleep in on Sundays,' he thought to himself. He turned back to the thick hardbound book and, while referring frequently to his English/Japanese dictionary, resumed laboriously sounding out the unfamiliar English words. "Hmm... Opti-mum resolu-tion of con-flict may not always resol... no... result. result... nani? (a quick reference to the dictionary) Ah, so... result - through vic-tory." He mentally translated the sentence to Japanese. "Ah! Victory is not always the best way for a conflict to end. Yes. Wait, that doesn't make sense..." A brief flurry of note taking.

The panda suddenly gasped, snorted and opened his eyes. He gave a barking growl to get the young man's attention and held up a sign: "Why are you waking me up by mumbling in foreign languages?"

"Ah... It's a test, Pop. Yeah, a big English test at school. I'm studying for it."

The panda flopped his head back down while holding up another sign: "Good Boy!" flip. "Wake me when breakfast is ready." The panda went back to sleep and resumed snoring.

The young man returned to his book "There-fore consid-er the... no... ah... these oth-er op-tions..." Another trip to the dictionary and more mental translation. "Why is English so damned hard? Oh well, this is good stuff..." More note taking.

Muttering quietly to himself he continued to struggle his way through the difficult book completley losing track of the time until...

Sometime later there was a knock and the door of the bedroom slid open. A young woman entered the room a step and first stared intently at the sleeping panda for a moment then turned to look at the oblivious young man. Softly, "Good morning, it's time to start getting ready." The panda stopped snoring and began to wake up. More loudly and harshly, "Ranma! Get up you Baka! You need to get ready. You _do_ remember you promised to help me today, don't you?"

Ranma looked first at the stirring panda and then at the young woman. He shrugged and said, "All right! All right. I'm up already. I remember." He looked at her ironically, "Well? I need to get dressed... or are you going to stay there and watch me?" *snort* "And you call _me_ a pervert, Akane!"

Akane started a slow burn. "Ranma no baka! You just wish I'd stay and watch!" *hmmmph* She stepped back into the hall and slammed the door.

Ranma gathered up the books and papers and dumped them on his futon. He dressed quickly and left for the bathroom.

The panda climbed to his feet and stretched. Shuffling over to Ranma's futon he thought, 'Study is all very well, but losing sleep is stupid.' As he thought, the panda stared at the incomprehensible English words of the book's title:

Sun Tzu Reconsidered: Conflict And Crisis In The Modern Era

From A Classical Asian Perspective

By

The International Institute For Strategic Studies.

And the paper label in Japanese: If found please return to Reference Desk, Nerima Branch, Tokyo Public Library

'What an idiot that boy is. He should concentrate on martial arts!' The panda walked to the door to begin his morning search for breakfast. 'Ranma is so stupid, sometimes.'

- = O = - - = O = -

Ranma 1/2 characters and situations are the property of

Rumiko Takahashi and licensees. They are used in this story

without permission.

Acknowledgements: (Which I stupidly left off the first time

I posted this.)

I'd like to thank Dave Eddy, Susan Doenime, and Gary Kleppe

for extensive help in pre-reading this and for giving so

many suggestions that invariably helped to make it better.

The first version of this story basically sucked which the

kind prereaders graciously pointed out to me. If this final

version is any better than average, a lot of the credit goes

to them. Thanks again folks.

As is usual for me, much that is correct and accurate in

this story came from helpful suggestions from others.

Mistakes and inaccuracies are all mine.

- = O = - - = O = -

The Masks We Must Wear

Ranma 1/2 Fanfiction by Bob Barnes

It was a typical Sunday spring morning in a Tokyo neighborhood called Nerima. The birds were singing. People were just beginning their work day. In the beautifully designed garden of a certain large house a koi leaped joyfully up into the sunlight and splashed back into the ornamental pond. As had also become usual in the last several months, loud crashes, shouts, and the staccato rumble of running feet could be heard from the large house.

As the voices rose in growing anger, words became clear. "Kawaikunee tomboy!" "Ranma you pervert!" A running young man appeared in the open doorway of the living room followed closely by an attractive though apparently very angry young woman. He dodged around the table in the center of the room and stopped to taunt her again. "You're just jealous because I'm better looking than you when I'm a girl!" She stopped, screamed in anguished rage, and suddenly a metaphysically impossible, huge wooden hammer appeared in her hands. Bellowing, "RANMA NO BAKA!" she unleashed a swing with the enormous mallet that Babe Ruth would have envied. *WHAM!* The blow connected and sent the boy crashing through the wall of the house on a gently rising trajectory that lofted him up over the courtyard wall and out over the neighboring houses and into the distance.

Yes, just another typical morning in Nerima. Nothing ever changes. People are so predictable, aren't they?

- = O = - - = O = -

Akane sat down at the table for breakfast muttering about Ranma's thoughtless stupidity. "Now I'm going to have to go buy those supplies for the dojo by myself, and Ranma said he'd help me. Inconsiderate baka pervert!"

Her father looked over his newspaper. "But daughter, dear, it was you who knocked him out of the house. Did you think he would be able to go shopping with you after that?"

"He started the fight, Father! He probably just didn't want to go with me. He's probably getting breakfast at the Ucchan or the Nekohanten right now, and laughing about getting out of helping me. Grrrr..."

"Akane-chan, you really should try harder to get along with Ranma-kun. He is your fiancee, after all," said Kasumi.

"As if I'd ever marry somebody like that Ranma. This whole engagement thing was Dad's and Saotome-san's idea, not mine. The very thought of being married to that... that... that... Arrrghhh!" With shaking shoulders Akane hunched down over her bowl and began to eat furiously.

Kasumi sighed and looked down at the table. It sometimes seemed hopeless to her. Would those two ever get together?

Nabiki, sitting across the table, glanced at her angry sister and did a double take. Was she trying to hide a smile? Was she shaking because she was trying, hard, not to laugh? 'Oh come on, stupid!' she thought to herself, and gently bopped the side of her head. 'Got to get my imagination under control. What could she possibly have to laugh about?'

Akane jumped up from the table and announced, "I'm finished. Thank you for the breakfast Kasumi-oneechan. I have to go now. Bye Bye, everyone." She grabbed her shoulder bag and ran to the front door. As she slipped on her shoes, she called over her shoulder, "I should be back by this afternoon, daddy. See you then." The others heard the front door slide open and shut followed by Akane's running footsteps on the front walk.

Soun sighed, put down his newspaper and broke the heavy silence, "My friend, I'm beginning to wonder if this marriage is going to work out. It's been nearly a year and those two seem to get along worse now than they did in the beginning."

Genma-panda looked thoughtful for a moment and held up ma sign that said: "You may be right, old friend." flip "I don't know what else we can do." He then rose and shuffled into the kitchen.

Soun turned to his other two daughters and looked at them calculatingly. "Perhaps Kasumi or Nabiki would be better suited..."

Kasumi gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. Nabiki was more forthcoming: "Oh no, Father! We've been over this before. Akane is the only real choice. There is no way Kasumi or I will go along with this. You just forget that idea right now. Ranma's not really a bad guy, but you're not marrying me to a dumb martial arts jock, and he's too young for Kasumi. Besides, I already know what it's like being engaged to him, and it is not _ever_ going to happen again." Nabiki glared at her father until he looked away.

Genma returned from the kitchen and watched the end of this confrontation thoughtfully.

Feeling certain that she had made her point strongly enough to settle the issue, Nabiki left the table to go to her room. Kasumi cleared the table and busied herself in the kitchen.

Genma sat back down at the table and contemplated his tea cup silently for a moment. "Tendo-kun, my old friend, I'm beginning to wonder what we are doing wrong. Your daughter and my idiot son are perfect for each other. Why won't they just accept that and get on with it? Is there some way we can apply more pressure to them?"

"If there is a way to push them together harder, we'll think of it. You can be sure of that. Let us think about it for a while and talk again this afternoon. Until then, are you ready to be beaten, again?"

"Why do you say 'again' Tendo-kun? Is your memory failing you? You have never beaten me... not without cheating, at any rate." As the two men moved to the game board they continued the old, old argument...

- = O = - - = O = -

Ranma-onna leaned back against the tile wall of the pedestrian tunnel and shivered slightly in her damp clothing. The tunnel connected the basement floors of two large commercial buildings separated by a major roadway and a branch rail line. The buildings were also connected by an overhead walkway at the third floor level. For some reason people seemed to prefer the overhead walkway to the tunnel and because of that the tunnel was seldom used. Better yet, the doors at the ends of the tunnel had hinges that squeaked loudly whenever they were opened making it easy to tell when someone came in. Best of all, there was no place to hide inside the tunnel. Ranma had checked that very carefully after he had found this place many weeks before.

Privacy was such a hard thing to find, what with voyeuristic family members, insane gymnasts, ninjas, Amazons, okanomiyaki chefs, obsessive rivals and occasional crazed revenge seekers all sneaking around and hiding and watching and listening. Because of this Ranma spent quite a lot of his time discreetly looking for places like this one. Just having a private conversation without being overheard was nearly impossible. Any kind of actual intimacy with anyone was out of the question except in very rare circumstances. Thinking of all this, Ranma-onna wondered if she should resent it all more than she did. It was a problem, certainly. It could be very annoying when important issues or situations had to wait to be discussed and settled. Still, the rare, stolen moments of privacy could be so sweet...

With a screech of rusty hinges and a bang, the door at the south end of the tunnel flew open and Akane Tendo came into the tunnel. Seeing Ranma-onna she started to trot toward her and growled angrily, "Ranma! There you are, you baka. I've been looking for you for half an hour. I see you landed in the water, again."

Ranma-onna stood up straight from the wall and turned toward Akane. She smiled cutely and said, "There was someone watching the primary so I had to come here to the backup. Did you see them? I think it was Shampoo. We are all clear here. I've already checked it. We can be alone for a time... Akane-san."

Akane's face lit up with her rare, beautiful smile. With a subtle shift of posture and bearing she changed her presence. She appeared softer somehow, more feminine and certainly more cheerful. When she spoke again her voice was soft and sweetly modulated. "Here, Ranma-kun, I brought the hot water for you," she said, taking a thermos from her shoulder bag and handing it to Ranma-onna. After his transformation, she took the thermos back and handed him a towel.

"Thank you very much indeed, Akane-san. I do appreciate your thoughtfulness. Your mallet strike earlier was absolutely perfect, you know. The force and placement of the blow, speed of the swing and, from what I could see, the follow through were all exquisitely precise and controlled."

"Ranma-kun, you're talking like a college professor, again. Have you been reading classical literature like I suggested?"

"Ahhh... yeah, I guess I have." Ranma's face turned serious. He looked at his feet and continued softly. "Akane-san, you know that 'Baka' sounds like an unschooled peasant with shit still on his shoes when he talks. I hate that, but it's the way I learned to talk. I _will_ change my speech, but I can only practice on you and only at times like this." He raised his head and looked closely into Akane's eyes. "I know the way 'Baka' speaks embarrasses you sometimes when we are together, out there. Maybe I'm over reacting." He gently cupped her cheek in his right hand. "Please forgive the embarrassment I must sometimes cause you, Akane-san, and please also forgive me if I go too far the other way when we can be ourselves."

Akane sighed and also cupped Ranma's cheek in her right hand. Her eyes glistened slightly as she gazed deeply into her friend's eyes. "I forgive you. It is forgotten." She stroked her cheek against his palm and said, "Please forgive me for the things I must say about you to others. I think I am far too good at insulting you. You know why I do it, but please also know: I don't really mean it."

Holding Akane's gaze, Ranma drew a deep breath, held it a moment and let it out in a long sigh. After a long pause he said the words, "I forgive you. It is forgotten."

They both dropped their hands and looked away from each other. After a moment, Ranma cleared his throat and said, "As I was saying, you were perfect with the mallet this morning. I've said this before, but I worry about one of the others attacking you when you are alone. It's an obvious thing for Kodachi or Shampoo to try. I want you to know that I'm feeling a lot more optimistic about that, now. I have a feeling that because of the way you've improved in the art since we started working together the next person who challenges you is in for a very _nasty_ surprise."

Akane blushed slightly and bowed to him. They both grinned strange little shark-like smiles at each other. "Oh you are too kind to me, Ranma-kun. I know I have a long way to go before I completely master our two families' art. I'm glad, though, that I didn't hurt you with my mallet. I do worry about that, sometimes."

"Nonsense, Akane-san. A true martial artist must be able to take a blow without being damaged too much."

Akane's brow wrinkled slightly. "Are you saying I can't hit hard enough to hurt you?"

"Not at all, Akane-san. Because of the signals we've worked out between us, I always know in advance when the blow will come. That makes it easy to prepare to receive it safely." Ranma chuckled and stood up very straight. With an ironic grin he said, "You should know this: your strength, now, is such that in a real fight you could easily kill or maim your opponent with a single blow. Your hands are never empty, Akane-san, for you potentially hold a person's death in them. It's a heavy responsibility that any true martial artist carries. Your honor and will are all that holds this back. Luckily, _your_ honor is true and your will is strong."

Akane laughed out loud. "So serious, Ranma-kun... you sound just like a sensei in a martial arts movie."

Ranma put his hand on the back of his head and laughed in an embarassed way. "Thank you, Akane-san. That is what I most want to be in this life. Not a movie martial artist, but a real sensei in real life." He shuffled his feet uncertainly for a moment. "Seriously, though, I ment that. Akane-san, you really do have the ability to kill, now. This is important. It really is an art, and _we_ really are artists. All that about honor and will sounds pompous, but we can't ever forget it. Without honor we'd be nothing more than a couple of skilled street thugs. Consider a serious fight with an opponent you already know, like Kodachi, for example. If or maybe when she attacks you again, you will have to decide how you want to handle it."

"What do you mean, Ranma-kun?"

"Hmmm... maybe it's a strategy thing. Kodachi uses weapons. That's a weakness and you know how to exploit it. Avoid her initial attack and then disarm her and then what do you do? Honor and will, Akane-san. At that point you could play around with her and scare her half to death or you could pound her into the ground and completely humiliate her or you could kill her as easily as you could snap a twig. So what will you do?"

Akane felt a thrill run up her spine. Ranma really did mean what he was saying. 'Is this what it feels like to be respected as a martial artist?' she thought to herself. "Ranma-kun, that sounds so ugly. I wouldn't want to humiliate or scare Kodachi, and the thought of killing someone makes me want to throw up."

"No. No, Akane-san. Oh... I'm not sure how to put this. Think about this: a painter has more than one brush. Maybe this hasn't happened to you before. In my opinion you have improved so much that you will do more than just win your next fight. If it's against Kodachi, you will dominate her."

Akane's face twitched in surprise and she recoiled slightly at Ranma's words.

Ranma smiled reassuringly at her, clasped her shoulders and began stroking his hands up and down her arms. "What I'm trying to say is, probably in your next serious fight there will be a kind of click in your mind and you will suddenly realize in that moment: you _could_ do any of those things to your opponent. _You_ will be in control of the outcome. Completely in control. Ah... It will be your choice which brush to use. Because of our training together and your hard work you now have several more brushes than you did before."

"What would you do, Ranma-kun?"

"What I always do. I would just barely win the fight. I'd beat my opponent, but not humiliate them. Let them think maybe I just got lucky. I'm not saying you should do that, but it's what I like to do. One thing, though, if you can help it, don't ever let your opponent see everything you've got. Always try to hold something back."

"But then they would just think they should try again. Why would you want that?"

"It's the art, Akane-san. Where would a martial artist be if everyone was afraid to fight them?"

It was as if a light had suddenly come on in her mind. "You really mean it when you say 'art' and 'artist,' don't you? A painter needs canvas and paint and... and brushes. A musician needs instruments and an audience. A martial artist needs opponents and fights. Wow! That's big, Ranma-kun, really big. I've got to think about this... a lot." She looked at him archly, "So, have you always been a philosopher?"

He grinned sheepishly, and looked away from her. "Not really. Just since a certain friend of mine started pushing books at me." He slid his hands back up to her shoulders and gently squeezed. "Dad just taught me a thousand ways to throw a punch and another thousand ways to block a punch. He seems to think that's what it's all about. It's because of you that I read things like _The Book of Five Rings_ and _Sun Tzu_." He pulled her closer. "I think my mind has grown more in the last year than it did in all the time before I came here. I owe it all to you, _friend_."

Akane reached up and squeezed Ranma's hands on her shoulders. "You know, I wish we could be like this all the time. It is so _good_ to have a friend like you. Do you remember that night I carried you... back from Doctor Tofu's."

"Of course! I'll never forget it. It was the night I made my first true friend. That memory is precious to me. You understood the situation we were in much better than I did. Your suggestion that we forgive each other for the mistakes we made at our first meeting and become real friends moved me like nothing else that had ever happened to me."

His voice caught and he stopped talking for a moment. He took her hands in his. Clasping both of them tightly he said, "Until that moment I had never realized how lonely I was. Nor did I know how ignorant I was of how to be a friend until you began to teach me. I wish we could be open about this, too, but you know as well as I do what would happen. Among other things, our father's would have us married in ten minutes if they had the slightest clue how we feel about each other."

"Would marriage be so bad, Ranma-kun?"

Ranma realized that Akane needed reassurance. After months of practice he had gotten much better at this. "Akane-san... how can I say this... because of the way my father raised me, my heart is still a child's heart."

"You've been reading poetry, too, haven't you, Ranma-kun."

He smiled and nodded. After thinking a bit he went on. "Marriage is a thing for adults, Akane-san. At the time of life when children learn about friendship and love, my father saw to it that I learned how to fight and win at all costs and nothing else. That stunted me. It stopped the growth of my heart, so in a sense it is still a child's heart. I only began to recognize my ignorance through your friendship and care for me, Akane-san. I can't say I love you because I don't think I know what love is, yet. I am learning though, with your help. Learning slowly, and you know full well that I make many mistakes, still."

She smiled reassuringly at him, but didn't interrupt.

"I know just enough to believe that now is the wrong time for either of us to marry anyone. If our fathers win, if we are forced to marry now, you will be hurt. I can't prove this, and I can't explain it logically. I believe it, though." He dropped her hands and moved a few inches away from her. "You should know this, Akane-san: I will do _anything_ to keep you safe from hurt. I would _die_ for that, if I had to. Does this mean I love you? I don't know. I'm still too ignorant to know." As if in shame for his inadequacy, he started to turn away from her.

Akane moved to stay in front of him. "Don't do that! Don't ever feel bad about telling me the truth!" Her voice broke a little. Softly. "Don't ever regret being a man with me." She crossed her arms and squeezed tightly into herself. "I know something is bothering you. Something we haven't been able to talk about. Oh, Sometimes I hate this thing we have to do. It hurts me when 'Tomboy' calls you those names and hits you all the time, Ranma-kun. It's so unfair to you to act like everything is always your fault. I look forward to the day when we can stop playing the roles and just be ourselves. I want that to happen so much..."

"The prize is worth it, Akane-san. You have to believe that. One way or the other we _will_ be free to live our own lives. It's true that we started this just to fool our fathers into giving up on the engagement. When all those other fiancees and rivals started appearing I didn't know what to do, but Akane-san, the 'Baka' and 'Tomboy' thing worked to keep them away, too." Ranma clasped her shoulders again and gave her a gentle shake of emphasis with each 'right'. "You were right in the beginning and you are still right. No one has the right to force us to do what we don't want. No matter what promises our parents may have made. No matter how rich or powerful another may be. No matter what anyone does to blackmail us or trick us. You have the right idea."

"Yes, Ranma-kun, I know I started it. I was willing to fight _every_ boy at Furinkan High every morning _forever_ to stop Kuno from claiming me like some stupid prize in a contest. I know, too, that this act we put on is just another way to fight back against people who would try to force us or hurt us in a lot worse ways if they ever suspected how we really feel about each other. It's getting harder to do, though." She sniffed and laughed ironically, then wrapped her arms around Ranma. "You'd think it would get easier with practice, and while it _is_ easier to stay in character after all this time, sometimes I want to do this so badly my heart hurts," she said, tightening her hug and burying her head in Ranma's chest.

His arms came up and pulled her closer. She felt so _good_ in his arms. He felt so calm and happy at times like this. The rare times they could be safe together. "I'll never forget the first time we just started improvising all this together. It was at your house in the morning at breakfast. I know we'd promised to trust and just go along with each other, but when I insulted you - I can't remember what I said - and you just went along with it and sent it back to me... what a weird feeling that was. I wanted to stop and appologize to you right then. I'm glad we trusted each other and went with it. I'm sure this is going to work for us." He pressed his cheek against the top of her head as if trying to completely surround her with his body.

The acid resentment he sometimes felt at the interfering others in their lives drained away, and he simply enjoyed the closeness of his friend. Her shivering tenseness also softened into calm acceptance of the intimacy of the moment.

_This_ was the prize they both strove for. This feeling. This simple thing they had discovered in each other... that neither of them had ever felt before in their lonely lives. They both believed it was too fragile to risk out in the open. The angry, obsessive others would ruthlessly crush it out of existence, if they knew. Their stupid, stubborn fathers would forcefully wrap them in heavy chains of duty, honor and obligation that would strangle and erase this feeling, if they knew. Even her sisters: loving, duty-bound Kasumi and devious Nabiki would interfere and fumble and thoughtlessly poison this precious, delicate, lovely feeling that was slowly growing stronger every day between them. If. They. Knew.

"Akane-san, I wonder if there will ever be another person in my life that I can trust like I trust you."

"What I sometimes wonder is how we got so lucky to find each other, Ranma-kun. We owe Tofu-sensei a lot. I think about trust and promises and secrets all the time. I've got to tell you something. Ever since Shampoo came you know we've been sharing one secret each time we get together like this. I've been trying and trying and I just can't think of another secret to tell you. You know it all, Ranma-kun. How about you?"

He stiffened in her arms. "Ah... well I think I've only got two left. It's kind of weird you brought Shampoo up. That was our first really big test, wasn't it?"

"It sure was. I had to struggle to trust you because you never said anything about her. Not to mention a certain event involving a friend of mine and a Chinese person asleep together that I could bring up if I hadn't already forgotten about it." Akane's mood darkened. "She was the one who showed us we had to keep up the acting. I would have been in real trouble if she had made me forget about 'Baka' the pervert as well as Ranma. She never knew there were two different 'people' who were connected by the same body, so to speak. When you started screaming insults at 'Tomboy' the very first thing that came back was that she was a role I should play and not really me. The next was surprise that it was _you_ insulting me, then all the rest of my memories just popped out at once."

"Nothing in my life ever scared me as much as that. I was ready to try anything. When you smacked me out of the dojo it saved me from having Dad see me crying tears of relief, Akane-san." *sniff* "It was like you had died, Akane-san." The memory of that day came back with all its horror. But with all its hope, too. The game they were playing became very serious that day, but it had saved them, too. "My Akane-san. I almost lost you, then."

Err... I know I keep bringing this up, but you know you don't have to be so formal with me when we are alone and safe like this. You can call me 'Akane-chan'. You can call me 'Akane'. Umm... Ranma-kun. What I mean is you can... call me anything you want... when we are alone..." She squeezed him tightly to her.

Ranma shivvered in her arms. Even his voice trembled. "Th-that's not it... sweet A-akane-_san_. The 'Baka' calls the 'Tomboy' 'Akane' because of a lack of respect for her. I don't think the 'Baka' really respects anybody. That's why he never uses honorifics. But... but _I_ respect _you_ and I guess I want to _do_ it... a lot... when I can. It's just a way to prove to myself that I am _not_ really the 'Baka,' and you are _not_ the 'Tomboy.'"

"I _know_ you respect me ba_... er... you somewhat-less-than-totally-brilliant-all-the-time man." *giggle* She loosened her arms and pushed Ranma back so she could see his face. "At least it's better than calling me 'Tendo' as if you were a close friend but slightly lower social class, like you used to do. You're making progress, Ranma-kun, my dear man."

Responding to her attempt to lighten the mood, Ranma smiled at her and reached up to gently brush her lips with his index finger. "No. We are making progress, together. I could never do it without the help of someone who understands me so well." He put his hands on his hips and smiled ironically at her. "Which you can do so well because you used to be such a tom_... Um... girl-with-a-strongly- masculine-character?"

She smiled appreciatively, tipped her head to the side and winked at him.

His answering smile faded in a few moments as a thoughtful look clouded his features. "It's a good thing you've had drama classes and stuff like that. I know I would never have thought of talking about 'Baka' and 'Tomboy' like they were different people and that thing about being a chair or those improvisation drills for when we were supposed to be sparring in the dojo." He cupped his chin in his hand. "Say, do you think I should take a drama class next term in school?"

Akane released him and began to pace, thoughtfully. "That's probably a bad idea. When we started we really only had to fool our fathers. Now there are a lot of people who would go completely crazy if our 'secret' came out. For example, I remember you said Ryouga has a crush on me." She suddenly stopped pacing for a moment and stared thoughtfully at the blank tunnel wall. "Umm... well anyway, He'd go violently nuts if he knew how close we really are..." She started to pace again but stopped after only a few steps. "Is _that_ why he hates you so much? It doesn't seem like enough, somehow..." She shook her head and turned toward Ranma. "So. Anyway, we better not give anyone cause to think too much about Ranma Saotome and acting in the same sentence, so to speak. I may even drop out of drama, just to be safer. Who knows how much longer we'll have to do this?"

"It's like juggling a few too many balls at once, sometimes." Ranma was watching Akane closely and rather nervously. "As for dropping out of drama... I don't think you should. Don't you really like it?"

"Sure. I love acting. I've even thought about taking drama in college. Well... we'll see about later when it comes. How's the time, Ranma-kun?"

"We've got some time, but I think we should be going fairly soon."

*sigh* "Yes. I guess you are right. We have to get back to what passes for real life." She came close and looked up into his face. "I really like the things we do the same way every time, but I wasn't kidding when I said I just can't think of any more secrets to share with you for this part. We can skip it if you want to."

She was shocked when Ranma flinched at her words. He turned away and walked a few steps, then changed his mind and walked back to stand right in front of her. He stood very stiffly and seemed to be searching for the right words to say. He started very slowly and quietly. "I was thinking about what to say, now, while I was waiting for you to get here. I... ah... I don't think we should skip it." His resolve seemed to waver, and he began to pace again, thinking. Finally he walked back to her and abruptly sat down on the floor.

He began twiddling his fingers together and stared at them. "I said I could only think of two more things to tell you. One is just really embarassing. The other is huge, Akane-san. For months I've been hoping I wouldn't _have_ to tell you the last big secret I've been keeping from you. It's not like Shampoo where danger came and we weren't ready, but I'm afraid it's going to be as big a test for us." He clasped his hands together and began to tap them on the floor. "I made a stupid promise to keep a secret and that made it a matter of honor, because a promise is a promise, you know?" He looked up at her.

What she saw literally brought her to her knees in front of Ranma. Tracks of tears were running down his face! Despite their openness with each other, and despite all the painful things they had shared between them, Ranma had openly cried like this only once before: the manliness promise that seemed to have cost him his mother. He must be serious when he said this was huge. She knew something had been bothering him, but had waited for him to be ready. This thing was hurting her man!

She felt a flash of anger, but under it a hard resolve grew. Although she never used the word for fear of pressuring him, Akane had known for some time that Ranma owned her heart. She loved this complicated, beautiful man with a fierce, firey urgency that was sometimes frightening in its intensity. She would cheerfully die for him. Sometimes, alone at night when sleep wouldn't come and the dark thoughts did, she worried that she might even be willing to kill for him. There had to be a way to help him. Suddenly she thought of something... something ugly and threatening.

She grabbed his clasped hands and pulled them into her lap. "Ranma-kun, was this a promise to keep a secret from _me_?" He nodded, closed his eyes then bowed his head.

Looking at his glossy black hair through a curtain of sympathetic tears she felt as if someting were wrenching and pulling at her stomach. Oh no, what to do? Technically, keeping this secret from her was permitted by the complex dance of rules and rituals promises and trust that had grown to define their odd relationship, but it felt like betrayal. What to do? In the end, the answer was simple. What single thing had gotten them safely through every crisis since the beginning? What was the adamantine core of the bond they shared? She drew in a deep shuddering breath and let most of it out.

"Then don't tell me."

She would trust him, again.

He looked up at her in surprise. "I mean it, Ranma-kun. A year ago I would have demanded you tell me. Six months ago I probably would have. Even three months ago, maybe. Now?" She let out a short bark of laughter. "I know your heart pretty well, my dear man. I'm in no danger from this, am I?"

A sharp shake of Ranma's head - no.

"Hmm... this _is_ something I could figure out for myself if I thought about it, isn't it?"

A tentative nod - yes.

She closed her eyes for a moment in thought then opened them and leaned forward to give him a quick peck on the lips. She settled back into her kneeling position. "I guess we all have to grow up sometime, neh, Ranma-kun? I think this is my problem and not yours. I know how important your honor is to you. If I asked it of you, you'd break your honor and tell me, wouldn't you?"

He nodded shyly - yes.

"Then don't. I give you permission not to tell me this secret."

Relief flooded Ranma's face and he leaned forward to hug her. It didn't work very well face to face on the floor like this. After a moment he rose to his feet and gave Akane a hand to help her up. She bent to fish a handkerchief from her shoulder bag and handed it to him.

After wiping his tears and blowing, he folded it and put it in his pocket. He slowly reached out to cup her cheek and asked, "Should I appologize for keeping this secret from you, Akane-san?"

She caught his hand and held it tightly. "I don't think so. Maybe you should save it for when I figure out this big secret." She looked at him out of the corner of her eye. "I'm likely to be pretty angry just then, right?"

His free hand darted to the back of his head and he gave an insincere giggle. "Ah, that would be telling, wouldn't it. No more clues, please?" He looked at her beseechingly and then cutely fluttered his eyelids at her.

She laughed. "All right. All right. No more on that one." Still laughing she said, "You know, you need a dose of cold water to pull that one off properly."

He started to pull back his hand and was surprised when Akane wouldn't release him. He looked at her questioningly. Oh boy, this was an Akane he didn't see very often. This looked just like the post combat adrenaline rush. He realized that this had been as hard for her as it had been for him.

She had a little 'v' shaped smile with lots of teeth showing. "Do you remember that long talk we had a few months ago about give and take?" He got that standard Saotome cornered-rat-looking-for-a-way-to-escape look on his face and nodded. "Well... don't you still owe me one?" Without waiting for a reply she leaned so close to his face that he could feel her breath as she said, "I want you to tell me the other one. The really _embarassing_ one."

He jumped back, blushed and tried to smile... weakly. 'Hmm... So she wants to play,' he thought to himself. 'Well, Miss Akane Tendo gets what she wants from me. I think I have just the thing, and it looks like a good time.'

"Oh boy. You don't miss a thing, do you." He put his hands on her shoulders and gently turned her to face away from him. He dropped his hands to her waist and pulled her back against him. As he slid his arms around her in a hug he said, "This kind is a lot easier to tell if I can whisper it into your ear." She snuggled back into him and put her hands on his arms. "It's about my feelings, and you know what a struggle that's been for me... telling you, I mean." She nodded. "I haven't been keeping it to myself because I was worried it would make you angry. I've been keeping it because it's so intimate."

She shivered in anticipation. She almost always liked these secrets, especially now that Ranma had grown much more confident about his manhood. It had been an uphill struggle at first when he had been convinced that boyish bravado and macho pride was all that stood between him and his greatest fear. 'As if having a girl's body from time to time could turn _him_ into a girl,' she thought to herself. *Hah!*

He jumped. "What was that for?"

"Ooops. Was that out loud? Sorry. I was just thinking."

"What were you thinking?"

"Weeelll, Ranma-kun. Since we promised to always tell the complete and honest truth to each other and since you _did_ ask... My exact thoughts, and this is verbatim mind you, were: As if having a girl's body from time to time could turn _him_ into a girl... Hah!" She craned her head back to look over her shoulder. "Want to hear the rest?"

"Yeah!"

Turning her head back to face away she continued, "I was remembering how impossible it was for you to talk about your feelings back when we first started. Also I was thinking about the very first two secrets we ever shared... that night on the way back from Doctor Tofu's. You do know that telling you about my feelings of inadequacy as a martial artist was the hardest thing I ever did, don't you?"

"I sure do. Just like telling you about my fear that my curse would turn me into a girl was by far the hardest thing I ever did. How were we able to do that? Where did the courage to take that kind of risk and trust somebody that much come from? I can't figure it out, and I think about it a lot."

"I don't know about that. I'm just glad it came from somewhere. Very glad. Anyway, the last part of my thoughts just now was how nice it is that you seem to have gotten over a lot of that fear. So tell me, what is this intimate secret?"

"Earlier you mentioned an incident in a bedroom involving a Chinese person. This is connected with another forgiven and forgotten incident in a bathroom near that bedroom that happened the day we met. One part of the secret is that I haven't forgotten all of that particular incident."

"Yeeesss. Do go on."

"My father and I did a lot of traveling when I was young, as you know."

"What's that got to do with it?"

"Just be patient. I'll get there. I learned a lot from all that travel and not just martial arts, although Dad rtried hard to limit it."

"Grrr... You're such a tease sometimes! Get on with it, will you?"

"One of the things I learned was the world has a lot of beautiful things in it. I had chances to see quite a few of them. I could spend a couple of hours describing them, if you like."

"Don't you dare!"

"Well it was beauty of nature type stuff. You know, tree covered mountains in the fall, Fujiyama under a coat of fresh snow, waves on the ocean at dawn just after a storm. You get the picture, right?"

"Uh huh."

Ranma's voice had dropped as he had spoken and he was now speaking in a whisper. "I saw a lot of beautiful things. Naturally beautiful things. And I saw something I wasn't supposed to see, too. I got a real good look at you, Akane-san. A real good long look, and you know what?"

"Uhh?"

"Out of all the beautiful things I've ever seen, one of them has to be the most beautiful. It was you, Akane-san. You, right there and then were the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"Ohhhh... That's a pretty good secret."

"That's not the secret, Akane-san."

"What? It's not?"

"No, it's just the lead up to the secret." Ranma pressed his lips against Akane's ear and whispered very quietly, indeed. "The secret is that I'd really like to see that sight again some day."

"'Oh, my!' to quote my straight laced sister. Do you want to see me naked, Ranma-kun?"

"I would enjoy that very much."

"Now?" She was pleased by Ranma's surprised jump.

"Was that an offer?"

"What do you think?"

"Truthfully, I think we don't have the time and this is certainly not a good place. To maintain honesty, I have to add that those two thoughts fill me with regret."

Akane turned in Ranma's arms and loosely wrapped her arms around his neck. Looking into his eyes, now. "Let me tell you something, my _man_ friend. Just pick the time and the place. I'll be there."

"Are you serious, Akane-san?"

"What I think is that it's about time. I'm not saying we should break any laws, but if you'd like to get a little more physical, it's all right with me. Why not? I'm certain I can trust you to treat me right."

"I've got to think about this. You really surprised me." He grinned at her. "I really should be used to that by this time, but there's always more to you. You just keep coming up with surprises for me. Pleasant ones. I'd love to be more physical with you, but I'm a little worried it might widen a gap I've been feeling." He hugged her tightly then released her and began to pace.

"What did that acting book say? Something like 'be the role'?" Ranma struck a totally fake 'dramatic' pose, held it for a bit and then dropped his arms to his sides. "It's kind of hard for me to 'be' the 'Baka'. Sure, I can do it in my sleep once I get going. My trouble is that it's hard for me to want it. My 'there' isn't there when I need to get back into the role. At least not without a struggle. I think the problem is, as time goes on Ranma is growing away from 'Baka' more and more. It's easy to see why. 'Baka' hasn't changed a bit in the last year except for learning some new martial arts techniques."

"I don't really have the same problem with 'Tomboy'. I think it may be because I liked myself, then. I like what I'm becoming _more_, but 'Tomboy' isn't such a bad kid... just a little odd and one sided. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention this earlier. 'Tomboy' is going to learn one of the great secrets of the ages in the next few days. It's one of the closely held secrets of cooking that she's been too dumb to figure out on her own."

_This_ definately got Ranma's attention. "And what is this obscure cooking secret?"

"It's called: 'Taste the food before you serve it.'"

Ranma fell to his knees and bowed deeply. "Praise be to Buddha and all the Avatars. At last! A Clue! Will wonders never cease?"

"Enough! Enough!" *giggle* "Come on, you knew 'Tomboy' wasn't going to get any better at cooking very soon even when you taught me how. Besides, it's such a great way to torture our Dads. She's not going to get _that_ much better. Just a bit less toxic. I want to tweak Ukyou a little."

"How will that tweak Kuonji-san?"

"Where do you think 'Tomboy' is going to learn the secret?"

"You have a truly devious mind. I like that in a friend. Say, you must be Nabiki Tendo's sister."

"Just a matter of self confidence, Ranma-kun." *sigh* "It's been a long time. I think we better get out of here, don't you?"

"Yeah. Right now people are probably wondering where we are and looking for us. Together or separately this time? I'll be so glad when this is all over and we can drop the act."

"Well, no one saw us come in. Otherwise we would have been invaded by now. Let's go together, this time." She pulled Ranma to his feet and grabbed him in a truly world class glomp. He glomped her right back. "It's only a matter of time, Ranma-kun. Someday we'll be able to do this anytime we want. Someday we might even be able to let it all show. All of it!"

"Ahhh... don't tease me, Akane-san. Please. It would be so _nice_ to just be able to tell all the others to get the hell out of our lives and leave us alone, and then stand back to back with you and knock them into next week when they attacked us. Someday I swear I will kiss you in front of your father and tell him that no I won't marry you until and unless you and I are both damned good and ready to."

"That would feel so good. I'll match you, Ranma-kun. One of these days, soon, my _man_ friend and I are going to go see Mrs. Nodoka Saotome and let her find out how manly you really are." She growled and bit him on the neck.

Ranma began to chuckle. "Oh yes, and then I'll splash myself and you and I can pound on Kuno together until he finally understands that we aren't interested. Hmmm... we may have to break every bone in his body, though, before he finally figures it out."

With a giggle, Akane chimed in with, "After that we may have to do the same thing to Kodachi or Shampoo, too." Suddenly a bit more serious, she added, "I really don't want to go that far with Ukyou. Of all the others, she's one I would really like to be friends with. Don't you agree?"

"Yeah, I think she's really a good person. She just needs to get over me. I don't know, Akane-san. Maybe she'll let us help. That would be nice."

"Yes it would. And after we get our fathers to give up on the marriage thing, we'll go find a real cure for your curse, Ranma-kun, and fix that, too. I mean, if we can fool everybody this much for this long, we can probably accomplish just about anything, together. Maybe even marry each other someday."

"Maybe so. I know the idea doesn't scare me or nothing. err... I mean 'or anything.' That's later, though. We've got a lot to handle right now." Ranma stepped back and took Akane's hand in his. It was time for the last ritual. "One thing is for sure..."

Both of them together: "Whatever happens we will be better parents than ours were." They hooked their little fingers together like two children. "No matter what, friends for life. I promise."

They dropped hands, stepped away and turned their backs to each other. Akane covered her face with her hands for a moment while Ranma put his hand to the wall and leaned a bit with his eyes closed. They both took a few deep, calming breaths. Akane, as usual, started it: "Ranma, you perverted baka, are you ready to help me with my shopping now?"

"Kawaikunee tomboy! I'm no pervert. You're just too dumb to notice!"

Akane flushed and drew her hand back to slap. Drew it back just a bit further than necessary and paused for just a moment before she swung it. *smack!* "How dare you say that to me. As far as I'm concerned you can just go do what ever you want to do! I don't need your help!"

Ranma put his hand to his cheek and rubbed it making it redden a bit and show a palm print. As he did this the two turned toward the north side exit to the tunnel and began to walk along. "You're so violent, _Akane_! I think you're just jealous of me, you know that?"

"What do you mean jealous!? Of you?!...

Bickering and arguing the way they always did the two walked through the tunnel and out into the hostile, watching world.

The End

Obligatory author's afterword:

I don't know if I should do an afterword to this. I mean,

the story ought to stand on its own merits, shouldn't it? Oh

well, it's my first fan fiction story so I guess I'll find

out if it stands on its own or not. I would like to say

something about the source of the idea, though.

You know, world class martial artists are not ever dumb

people. Since it's as much a matter of the mind as of the

body, you just don't get that good if you aren't pretty

smart. Since I first started watching and enjoying Ranma 1/2

the apparent stupidity of Ranma and Akane has bothered me.

The more I saw of the anime and later read in the manga the

more this bugged me. The two of them never get a clue of how

to get along better. Both of them just keep on stubbornly

doing exactly the _same_ dumb things that make their

relationship worse and worse. Why is that? Why don't they

ever change? Any actual human adolescent will tell you this

is the time of life where change comes the fastest to a

person. Anyone older... well, remember what it was like?

One day, this idea came to me. Anyone who has seen the anime

will remember the night that is referred to in the story.

I'm assuming that Ranma and Akane in my story just want one

thing: to be left alone to love the one they want and not

(one of) the one(s) they should. It doesn't actually seem to

me to be a lot to ask for. I haven't decided in my own mind,

yet, if Ranma and Akane will ever marry, assuming they can

keep their fathers and all the rivals at bay long enough to

make their own choice. As it is, I didn't have to make my

mind up about that for this story because this story is

about love, not marriage. Do Ranma and Akane love each

other? That's a damn good question, don't you think? ^_^

- = O = - - = O = -

Responses, comments and criticism are eagerly solicited.

Please contact me at rbarnes(moscow dot com) . My other stories

(all one of it, so far) along with rough drafts (sometimes

very rough) of further parts of this story can be found at

the following URL:

(geocities)Tokyo/Towers/8341/

(Thank you, Dave.)