Pan's Dream
by Majs

Pan walked quietly in her house. Everyone was taking Goku's departure a few weeks ago differently. Pan's father Gohan, seemed more immersed into his work. ChiChi cried herself to sleep every night. Even Goten, Pan's usually cheerful uncle, seemed to be in a downcast mood lately. Somehow, everyone felt that Goku's departure was different from the other times that he left. At least during those times he would be somewhere, whether it was in the afterlife, or somewhere in what Pan called the land of the living. The land of the living was where everything was in, that wasn't dead. Pan and Vegeta knew beforehand that Goku wasn't coming back. Everyone only seemed to catch on afterwards.

Pan sighed and turned off the light switch in her room. Her room became dark and even darker shadows loomed in every corner. She sat down on her bed and hugged one of the pillows as she stared out the window. She really didn't think of anything, her mind only replayed the events of the day.

Bra came up to her earlier in the day. She asked Pan to train her. Pan to train her, Vegeta's daughter for Kami's sake! Obviously this was in secret because Vegeta would probably kill Pan if he knew about this. She was confused why Bra had asked her. Vegeta would be better trainer, but, then again, Bra was spontaneous sometimes. Bra knew how to fly, but never really learned how to fight. Besides that, Pan wasn't a sensei, she didn't know how to teach Bra how to fight. Pan told her that she would think about it. Some part of her wanted to teach Bra, it would give her something to do. She would probably tell Bra her decision tomorrow.

'Heh, not only a challenge, its only more competition', Pan thought. Pan was envious of Bra. She had money, looks... oh it was definitely the looks. Bra developed fast even though she and Pan were the same age. Bra looked as though she was a senior in high school, and Pan, with her tomboyish look, looked as though she was eleven years old. She hoped that it would change soon.

Those weren't the only thoughts running through Pan's mind. She had gotten a huge surprise. Her mother, Videl, was pregnant. That meant the she would get a little brother or sister. She couldn't wait. That wasn't the only thing. Gohan had said that the family will officially move to the city before the baby would be born. ChiChi didn't take that too well. Gohan had to leave. His work required him to be in the city more often and besides, Pan would be closer to the schools. ChiChi didn't like the idea of living in the city. It would probably take some time before she finally moves on, Pan thought.

Pan sighed and laid back on her bed. Her father had gotten a bit more serious. He hardly smiled anymore. She couldn't imagine how he must have felt. He lost two father figures in such a short amount of time. Piccolo and his own father. Although he was taking it better than she thought he would.

Pan felt tired and started to close her eyes. A small fear tugged in the back of her mind. 'What if it would happen again, tonight?' She figured that she was used to the dreams but there were some nights that they were unbearable. She didn't want to go to anyone about her dreams. It wasn't that much of a problem for her anymore and she figured that it was sort of her little secret. There were some nights that she wished that she could talk to someone about them, but she figured that they would think of her as crazy.

She had different feelings towards her dreams. She was afraid of them. Seeing the future wasn't a good thing to grow up with. She ignored them. If they got too bad, she would just shrug them off and not think about them. She hated them. They told her the future and that's why she hated them. There were some things that she would have rather not have known that was going to happen. And it was because of them that she went on that stupid trip around the universe, collecting the black-star dragonballs. But she ignored some of her dreams and her grandpa Goku turned into a kid. She sort of blamed herself because she knew that it was going to happen.

'Well, the trip wasn't that bad...' Pan thought. She had to admit that while there were times she was scared, there were a lot of fun times on that trip. And if they hadn't gone, then they couldn't have stopped Baby and then.... Pan shuddered. Another thing that she hated about her dreams was that they were so mixed up. While there would be images that were crystal clear, they would be in fragments. Different nights, different fragments. Pan opened her eyes suddenly. She just remembered that when she had the dreams of her Grandpa as a kid, she saw a few images of Baby too. Pan groaned and shook her head. She really need to get some sleep that night. She would have to face those dreams sometime.



Pan stood on a gray field. There was a fog lying low on the ground and all she saw was different shades of gray. No, she thought, I'm not gray as she looked at her hands. She was still the same. "Where am I?" she said out loud, expecting an answer. When no one answered she started walking. Suddenly she felt something behind her. In a flash, she turned around and assumed a fighting stance. But there wasn't anyone there. Instead there was a door. Hesitating, she reached out, turned the doorknob and walked in.....

To find herself in what looked like a nursery. Pan entered the room and looked around. She heard cooing and walked toward the crib. Inside was a baby boy. Pan smiled as she looked at the baby until she saw something that made her eyes open wide. The baby boy had a tail! He held the tail protectively in his hand while he looked at Pan.

Pan looked into the baby's eyes and felt drawn to him. She went deeper and deeper. Then she saw his as he was now. He was in her mother Videl's womb! Pan tore herself from his gaze and backed from the crib. He was her brother! Pan shivered a bit from what she saw. Something was different. When she looked through his eyes and saw him who he really was, she felt something. She felt him grow. She felt what he was thinking. Pan shivered more and let a few drops of tears fall from her eyes. The contact was brief, but it was enough. She walked back to the crib and looked at her brother. She avoided his eyes this time and absent mindedly said "So your my brother, eh? I wonder what's your name?"

"His name is going to be Goku Junior." A voice from behind said.

Pan turned around in fright. She stared at the tall figure in front of her.

"Grandpa?" Pan hesitated. Tears started building up in her eyes as she saw her grandfather in front of her, alive and well.

Goku smiled and opened his arms to her. Pan ran towards him and hugged him with all her strength. "Oh Grandpa, grandpa -sniff- why did you go? Why can't you be with us? Why, grandpa, why?!!" Pan cried. Tears flowed from her face and all Goku could do was to hold her, trying to comfort her.

After a few minutes, Pan's crying subsided and she loosened her grip, enough that she could see him in the face. Goku smiled and wiped the tears from Pan's face. "I see that your just as strong as ever! I couldn't breath for a second, I thought you were going to crush me!" Goku said.

Pan smiled a bit and let go of her grandfather. He smiled back at her and put a hand on her shoulder. "Come on, Pan, lets take a small walk."

Pan followed him into the grayness. She didn't seem to notice that the nursery was gone, vanished. All she knew was that her grandfather was back. She did notice something strange about him. He seemed to glow. Not literally, but something about him seemed brighter. It was strange, he seemed.... whole....perfect. There wasn't any words that Pan could describe him as. She felt a little frightened for a second but then something told her that there wasn't any reason for her to be. She looked up at her grandfather questionably. "Are you back... to the land of the living?"

Goku smiled at that statement but it was a sad smile. He looked at her and shook his head no. Pan frowned and looked to the ground. Then another question formed in her mind. "Was that really my brother? What was that I felt?"

"Yeah, it was your soon to be brother. The thing that you felt, well, I sort of made that happen. I wanted you to see him how he really is, or going to be. Besides, it was something that you needed to see. It might not be clear now, but it will be. Pan, both of you are special, I want you to watch over him in the future."

Pan nodded and looked straight ahead. "I have another question."

Goku nodded and stopped walking. This was the question he was waiting for.

"Even though you aren't back.... could you come back....if you wanted to?"

Goku had a serious face and nodded his head yes.

Pan closed her eyes swallowed. "Will you come back to us then?"

Goku closed his own eyes and turned his head away. "No."

Pan looked at him in shock. Her own grandfather just said no. No to coming back. No to being with everybody. No to her.

Her anger was starting to grow. Tears started to flow down her face like they would never stop. "Why?" she managed to whisper.

Goku looked straight into her eyes. "My time is over. I could only make things worse if I come back. There are other things that you don't understand....yet. You will someday. Don't worry about me. I lived my time. And I will come back one day. Just... different." Goku sighed and tilted his head. "Pan, you have an incredible gift. I know how you feel about it. You'll understand someday why you have it."

Pan looked up in shock through her tears. How did he know about her dreams? she thought. Goku smiled and put his finger under her chin. "Don't worry. Be strong." He kissed her forehead and pressed something in her hand.

"I'm going to visit your grandmother now. This is, I believe, good bye, for now." Goku walked away and briefly did a two fingered salute before disappearing. Pan looked in her hand and saw a gold charm bracelet that her grandpa Goku had given to her on her four birthday. Pan held the bracelet close to her and felt to her knees crying.



Pan woke up with the bright light of the sun entering her room. She sighed and stared up at the ceiling. 'Just a dream' she thought. Her face felt cool and damp and when she brought her hand up, she realized that she had been crying. Then she realized she was holding something. She looked in her hand and saw the gold charm bracelet. 'Was it a dream?' she thought now.

She got up from her bed and quietly snuck into her grandma's bedroom. There she was, sleeping, with a smile on her face. Pan smiled and walked back to her bedroom. 'Maybe it wasn't just a dream,' she thought as she sat back down on her bed. 'I'm going to have a brother.' Pan thought, with a smile on her face.