Out Think, Out Smart, Out Gas
Part 5
A Get Smart Fan Fiction
By Resurgent-class
Finally! Everyone who're still with us, welcome to the conclusion of this 5 part fan-fic! And yes, NEVER again a pentalogy if I can help it! Whew! Okay if you're all set da read, I hope you like it.
Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN ANY GET SMART ORIGINAL SERIES CHARACTERS
CHAPTER 1
"Oh Max! What're we going to do?" 99 whispered as she marched, shoulder to shoulder with Max, her arms holding onto his, her only anchor in a situation out of control.
"Don't worry Ninety-Nine." Max assured. "Maybe they'll just tie us up and leave us here when they finish their job."
99 looked anxiously about them as they were escorted through the hangar, now walking through the space that separated the revetments with the prototype AV-Seven-Z Harriers. She looked left and right at the 4 aircrafts at each wall, in their individual revetments and her breath caught in her throat as she saw the unconscious technicians and crews who laid on the hangar floor outside the reinforced barricades. Through the greenish haze and emerald hue of the lights, 99 could see KAOS agents inside 4 of the aircraft's cockpits, likely removing the X-10 missile detectors.
Kerstin walked behind them with Hayler and the big KAOS agent on either side of her, weapons levelled at their backs while the remaining two KAOS agents marched on either side of 99 and Max. Max's dress shoes and 99's flat heeled black leather boots clopped softly on the hangar floor as they walked for their captors had confiscated the bulky hazmat suits and accompanying masks and overshoes along with Max's shoulder holster, revolver and wrist communicator T-37 and her handbag which she had hidden inside her hazmat suit along with her derringer pistol.
Despite their situation, 99 was glad to be moving unencumbered again in her navy blue woollen skirt suit with the knee length A-line pleated skirt and 3 large buttoned, waist length cropped jacket over her turtle neck sky blue and navy blue horizontal stripped t-shirt. She actually felt 3 pounds lighter at least and most comforting of all, she could feel the strength and warmth of Max's arm through her black kidskin gloves and his Davy's gray suit jacket sleeve and even more acutely on her lower forearms left bare by her three quarter length jacket sleeves.
"But Max, it'd make no sense for them to just let us go!" 99 whispered urgently into Max's ear, her pulse racing from the contact of their bodies and despite their perilous situation.
"Ninety-Nine!" Max declared softly as he rubbed her gloved knuckles causing 99 to tremble exquisitely. "The very fact that I'm alive and breathing right now, is PROOF that the forces of evil and rottenness hardly EVER does anything that make's sense!"
Max nodded definitively to punctuate his sentence only to open his mouth again and freeze as they both frowned at what he just said.
As they approached the internal building at the east wall and the last revetments on either side, they heard the continuous droning and whine of some form of motor. Upon clearing the revetments, Max and 99 stared for a moment at the source of the sound. 2 forklifts—the first had crashed sideways against the wall of the internal building about 30 feet to the right of the door while the second one had slammed headlong into the side of the first forklift and they remained locked together in a united wreck, engines still straining but going nowhere.
As they approached the central door of the building, Max and 99 saw the two sleeping airmen that had likely been the drivers, having fortunately been thrown clear before the crash, snoring away on the floor just a few feet from the nearest revetment at the south wall.
"Catargi." Kerstin spoke up behind Max and 99. "Shut off zhose engines."
The stockier KAOS agent on Max's right with the F1 submachine gun ran towards the wrecked forklifts, the soles of his overshoe boots screeching on the hangar floor.
"Dona try-a anyding Shmart!" came the muffled but still threatening growl of the big KAOS agent behind them with the Beretta M12. "Uzzar wise I make-a formaggio svizzero of you two wit led! Capire?!"
Max frowned as he kept his big hand on 99's slender gloved fists at his arm.
"Wait a minute. I KNOW that voice!" He turned to look over his shoulder as they kept walking. "Is…is that…Specchi?!"
With a theatrical bow while keeping his Beretta M12 aimed at their backs, the bigger KAOS agent confirmed.
"The same!"
"You mean Martino Mino Specchi?" 99 asked her blue eyes shining against the green lighting around them.
"That's right Ninety-Nine!" Max confirmed speaking to her and over his shoulder at the same time. "Formerly, Maggiore—Martino Mino Specchi of the Royal Italian Army's Sixth Alpini Regiment in World War Two, then Capodecina to the Cosa Nostra in Mussomeli after the war and now—low down KAOS killer!"
"I moving-ah up in der world no?!" Specchi taunted before laughing with his cowl shrouded head tossed back, the muffling of the gas mask only making him sound more terrifyingly demented. "And-ah don't ting I forget—YOU put me in prison for THIRTY years!"
"What're you talking about?! You were SENTENCED to thirty years but you escaped after TWO months!" Max exclaimed looking back over his shoulder at the big KAOS agent.
"Sì! I couldn't wait dat long to KILL you!" Specchi snarled, puntuating his malice with a nod.
"Always in a hurry!" Max snorted shaking his head as he grimaced over his shoulder at the big man.
The elevator deposited them on the third floor and Max and 99 were shoved out into the centre of a T-shaped corridor's horizontal arm. They both noted the vertical branch of the corridor ended nearly 30 feet away, intersecting another horizontal passage and the solid rectangle of gray steel that was the door to the command centre. The green gas made the passage ways looked like emerald rivers of swirling mists which were slightly lower at about calf level on this floor.
99 stifled her gasp as she saw the two air policemen sitting on the floor and slumped against the wall on either side of the door, blood soaking their flak jackets and a vertical swath of blood over their heads on the wall showing where they had slid down, carried by the weight of death. She managed to make out 2 other collapsed air policemen outside the C&C, a stocky looking veteran and a young African American and was relieved to hear them snoring in the green mist.
They were marched about 3 yards down the vertical corridor to a heavy, varnished, knob-less hardwood door. As they approached, they saw another 7 or 8 air policemen collapsed in the swirling green mists on the floor or slumped against the walls outside the wooden door. 99 could see some of their name tapes on their flak jackets—Mitchell, Hallenbeck, Smith, Conklin, Hale…
99's attention was pulled away as they stopped outside the wooden door and Kerstin spoke into a walkie-talkie.
"Jäger Scout Vun to Jäger Scout Four. Open zer door."
A moment later, the wooden door whooshed aside. Max and 99 upon being pushed through found themselves at the corner of a large windowless, rectangular office. The width of the wall which the door was in measured about 20 feet and they found themselves looking down the approximately 30 feet of the office's length, at the end of which was the 10 feet wide desk of the occupant, just a few feet from the rear wall.
As Max and 99 was marched down the length of the office towards the desk with the green mist swirling around their shins and calves, passing by large portraits depicting individuals and scenes of the American Civil War mounted on the walls to both sides of them, they saw the man in a blue Air Force service uniform with neat white hair and matching neatly trimmed thick moustache, standing before the large desk, a military issue Colt M1911A1 in his big right hand. The silver buttons of his service dress, single breasted coat reflected the greenish light in the office and an impressive 6 rows of ribbon devices and service ribbons decorated the left breast of his jacket above the pocket along with other badges and awards.
But more importantly, both of them saw, seated on the floor, slumped back against the desk's front panel at right corner, his chin tucked in to his chest, was the Chief of CONTROL. The front of his tweed sports jacket was rumpled in several bluish gray undulations due to his slouched position while the emerald mist enveloped him from his waist down hiding most of his legs. 99's heart thumped anxiously in her breast at the sight of the thin stream of blood trickling from their superior's left temple.
"Oh my god! Chief!"
The sight of the Chief's injury and state pushed her into a desperate rush forward but Catargi's gloved hand closed around her right arm with the power of a raptor's claws tearing a yelp from her as she was jerked so violently to a stop that the round head of her humerus grated audibly in the shoulder blade's cup-like socket. Max lunged over, grabbing at Catargi's shoulder only to have Specchi and the slender KAOS agent grab hold of his arms and yank him off.
As Max struggled against his captors, 99 squirmed in pain from Catargi's unrelenting grip on her bicep but she noticed the Chief was still breathing and his arms were behind his back, likely restrained by his wrists to the leg of the desk. Their captors despite keeping hold of them continued to escort them forward till they were about 15 feet from the desk before stopping them entirely and wrenching them around to face the direction whence they had just came with 99 on Max's left.
99's arm ached as Catargi finally released her and stood a few steps off to her left with his back towards the wall with the tactical and situation maps. At the same time, Max grimaced with indignity as the 2 KAOS agents restraining him released him finally but he yanked his arms away as a sign of defiance all the same and straightened his Davy's gray sports jacket's sleeves.
As Specchi backed off a few steps on Max's right, joined by the slender KAOS agent, both of them putting their backs to one of the long black leather sofas and as well as corresponding coffee tables of black glass that faced the opposite wall where the tactical maps were.
"What have you done to the Chief?!" 99 demanded, looking over her shoulder at their unconscious superior.
Facing them just beyond an arm's length with Hayler cradling his MP-40 on her left, Kerstin's luscious lips twisted in a frosty smirk as she kept her Hi-Power pointed at hip level.
"No need to concern yourself. Your Chief ees simply sleeping along vith—MOST of zer personnel of Area Fifty-Three-D. Und S-S-Nineteen intends to keep eem alive for ransom."
As Kerstin spoke, she was joined by the white moustached officer who took up position on Hayler's left while pointing his M1911A1 at the CONTROL agents.
Despite his age, the depth and width of his chest within his service jacket pointed to an athlete but it was the name tag on the right breast of the jacket that 99 gasped at.
"Max! It's Colonel Archer!" 99 gasped, her blue eyes wide shining forth in the green hue of the office.
Max's smiled humourlessly as his beady eyes narrowed at the man's name tag.
"So! THAT's how you infiltrated the base and got your hands on the antidote. The colonel here is on your side.—" Max looked over at Archer's stone cold face as he addressed the commanding officer. "—Well colonel! I hope you realise that once the Air Force discovers you're a KAOS double agent—you'll only be entitled to ONE pension!"
"I live, serve and die, at the pleasure of the Marquise!" was Archer's only response causing Hayler to turn his head towards the commanding officer.
Max turned to 99, nodding with admiration as he declared.
"A man who values loyalty over financial rewards."
As Max spoke, Hayler points a gloved finger at the impressive rows of ribbon devices, service ribbons and assorted badges decorating Archer's service jacket before pointing to his own chest, a mournful muffled lament emitting from his gas mask.
"I have zhose too.—"
"Max!" 99 declared leaning her head towards him. "The colonel is obviously under some kind of mind control."
"—but not zhose…sigh." Hayler sagged as he pointed at Archer's shoulder sleeves to which were pinned, the gleaming rank insignias of the stylized silver eagle dominating the Great Seal of the United States, clutching an olive branch in it's right-side talons and a bundle of arrows in the left-side talons.
"The Marquise's finest verk so far." Kerstin smiled. "Oh. Bevore I forget. Specchi—Mister Shmart's shoe phone."
With that, the hulking Specchi stepped up and delivered a kick to Max's right shoe producing a loud crunch and ring. Max jerked forward slightly, his eyes popping in pain as Specchi stepped back again.
Grimacing, Max stared at Specchi scowling.
"THAT'S it Specchi! If you think the Nuremberg trials were bad—just wait till A-T and T, hunts you down!"
The exchange was interrupted by a voice filtering over an intercom speaker at the colonel's desk causing Max and 99 to turn towards it momentarily.
"Kerstin. Die Tür bitte."
Kerstin spoke towards Archer with a tilt of her head towards the desk.
"Süßigkeiten Bär."
As 99 frowned at how Kerstin had addressed the commanding officer, Archer strode away past them to his large desk where he pushed a button on a control box on it. The door at the other end of the office again whooshed open.
The sound which often was associated with strong winds was further accentuated by the sudden chill that for no reason coiled around Max and 99 in the climate controlled office. 99 thought for a moment that she was actually standing outside in the snow surrounded by the snow drenched mountains and half expected the swirling green mists around their knees to be blown aside. It was the same chill that gripped them both in the National Museum back in Washington D.C only now, it was more pronounced. And with that, the visual impact of what they saw now almost paralyzed both the CONTROL agents.
It took them a few seconds to realize it wasn't a trick of the light or a shadow. Upon narrowing his beady eyes, Max finally made out the slender, black jump-suited form at the doorway to the office. It stood so still at first he thought it was some form of mannequin someone had placed there. When it began moving forward, the mists around it's knees seemed to swirl and roil before it's long legs even reached them to give way to it's passage. If it was not for the moving limbs, Max could swear that it was eerily floating towards them which would be scarier than the gollywoggles awaiting him always in the darkness of his bedroom.
The figure moved with absolute silence and as it closed in, 99 finally made out the draped turban on it's head and the shimmering black silk veil that hung from the matching millinery surrounding the head at face level. The veil was so close to the face 99 thought she could just make out a sharp nose pressing against it but strangely, the cloth did not stir or flutter at all despite the obvious need to breathe.
As the figure drew nearer, Kerstin and Hayler stepped aside from each other to let it pass. Max also began to make out the strong yet feminine curves of the figure at hip and chest despite the heavy fabric of the jumpsuit. Pockets over the chest further accentuated the distinctive but soft slopes at it's chest which to him was dichotomous against the masculine utility belt which held pouches of various sizes including at least 5 slender ones near the left hip for detachable box magazines for the holstered Luger P08 at the curve of the right hip.
As the figure whispered past Kerstin and Hayler and Archer re-joined them, the alto voice, seemingly disembodied, wrapped around them like a winter gale and disconcertingly soothing which 99 realized was how a person felt as he or she was lulled into the fatal slumber in the final stages of hypothermia.
"If I had six hours to chop down a tree—I will spend the first four sharpening the ax.—" Stepping past Kerstin and Hayler, the figure finally came to a stop, within reach of Max and 99 gesturing with a black gloved hand at the portraits of the prominent historical figures. "—A saying, commonly attributed to your former president, zhough some dispute zhis. Regardless, I am zure sumvun of hees visdom vould agree vith it's principal—zhat zer achievement of any objective, requires careful und rigorous preparation.—" The figure paused and it's veil turned from Max to 99 and back again before continuing. "—Yet, whoever spoke it probably never encountered you—Mister Shmart.—"
Max puffed out his chest at his, smiling widely, head nodding slightly from side to side, with his eyes half-lidded, riding his ego powered locomotive as he straightened his maroon, black and scarlet striped tie.
"Ovar FIVE months of planning for everyvun of zhese oparations—" SS-19 continued her gloved hands clasped behind her. "—Every single step, every phase, contingences upon contingencies for every possible aberration und event, alternate hideouts und deceptions. I had zhis feeling zhat somevun vas vatching owver second hideout een zer Copper Mountains. I prepared countermeasures, und zer Oberführer confirmed zhat Ancaster vas on owver trail. Vee suspected he vould sell zhat eenformation to CONTROL soon as possible to prepare for a larger profit vhen he discovers owver final target. Eet vas my failing I now vealized for not moving us from Copper Mountain to anazher hideout as time vas running out und I trusted zer electronic surveillance to detect intruders—vhich you both obviously circumvented.—" She stopped for a moment as her right hand came out from behind her back to raise a gloved finger before she continued with her head slightly bowed. "—Und zhen, vhen I veturned from zer Oberführer at vhich time—I now vealized you were both hiding inside vun of zer trailers—I again had zer feeling zhat somevun vas een zer barn vith us. I led a search und I SHOULD have discovered you yet of all times, a stray DEER interceded. Und Specchi now eenformed me zhat earlier, zhey also thot zhey heard something—likely vhen vun of you, most likely Mister Shmart accidentally locks zer trailer door— vut vhen he checked, zer vind und a flapping barn door saved you both—"
SS-19's head lifted now and her veil faced them again.
"—Zhen as eef zhat vasn't enuf—due to my OWN planning, und zer deception I orchestrated, instead of letting zer men ride, spread out in both trailers, it necessitated me to have all zer men vith me inside vun trailer so zhat I could brief zhem upon veaching our true objective. However, I did NOT specify to zhem VHICH trailer. Zhere vas a fifty-fifty chance zhat zhey vould have boarded zer trailer you vere both een und discovered you vut AGAIN—against all odds, zhey boarded, zer UZZER trailer enabling BOTH of you to remain undetected und to discover owver true final target."
SS-19 paused her veiled visage sweeping back and forth between them before continuing.
"Zer Oberführer was right about you Mister Shmart. You are zer vun thing zhat zer greatest strategic minds, tactician und military genius can never account for—"
Max's wide smile turned into a giant smirk as his chest puffed out even further then his rib cage would reasonably allow while he kept adjusting his tie.
"—A lucky-bumbling-fool."
Max's smirk shrivelled into a pout and his half-lidded eyes popped open in shock and 99 thrusted her smooth sharp angled chin out in defiance at the assessment.
"Vut zhen to discount luck entirely, ees to most certainly court failure as vell. So—" SS-19 bowed her head. "—vell played."
Straightening again, she acknowledged.
"Vee have not been formally introduced. S-S-Nineteen. Maxvell Shmart—" she turned and nodded at 99. "—Agent Ninety-Nine. Eet ees a privilege to meet you both een person."
"You won't get away with this!" 99 declared. "Even if you get the fuel and the X-Tens out of this installation, this base MUST have a pre-scheduled radio check with another Air Force installation. When you leave and no one replies upon their next transmission, they'll send troops and aircrafts to investigate and stop you!"
At this, Kerstin smiled as SS-19 replied.
"Vee are prepared for zhis. Gerd ees een zer command centre, setting up zer relay link to owver own communications eqvipment. It vill relay any transmissions zhat comes eento Area-Fifty-Three-D to us even eef vee vere hundreds of miles avay. Und vith zer authentication codes zer colonel has kindly supplied us, vee shall be undetected long after vee are gone."
"Well, S-S-Nineteen! I suppose you think you've got everything covered don't you?" Max's beady eyes glittered as he smirked at the veiled woman. "You think you're all so smart huh!"
As Kerstin's eyes glittered like emeralds and SS-19 listened quietly to Max, he continued, lifting up a finger so swiftly it caused the men and Kerstin to lift their firearms at him as he continued relentlessly.
"Well THINK again! There is one thing you haven't counted on!"
"Und vhat ees zhat?" SS-19 queried with a tilt of her head causing her veil to rustle softly on the jumpsuit's fabric over her breasts.
"The KEEN razor sharp mine and strategic PLANNING of Maxwell SMART!" Max declared, his narrowed eyes as focused as a raptor's. "Alright! Drop you weapons and surrender now!"
Muffled chortling and laughter along with shaking shoulders broke out from all the men around them except Archer who simply stared at the CONTROL agents with his ever ready M1911A1 levelled.
As Kerstin's full lips smirked and a snigger escaped her smooth throat, SS-19 asked.
"Und vhy vould vee do zhat?"
"Because! When we first arrived at Area-Fifty-Three-D and I realized you had taken over the base, I IM-MEDIATELY contacted the Joint Chiefs and Sec Def. Right this minute, this en-TIRE mountain—is being surrounded by three HUNDRED, highly trained, mountain-warfare equipped, Green Berets! Would you believe it?! Three HUNDRED Green Berets!"
"No." was the response from the veil.
"Oh." Was Max's response and after a second of strategizing, leaned forward and turned his head to cast a sideways stare at SS-19 as he tried again. "Would you believe TWO hundred, highly trained, Marines on snowmobiles?"
"Nein."
"How bout' a vacationing Canadian Mountie with a tired Alaskan Malamute?"
99 could not tell if SS-19 was fuming in anger, smiling or simply disappointed behind the veil but her wintry soft alto voice came forth again as chilling as ever.
"I regret, zhis vill be owver first und final meeting. Rest assured, your Chief will live to mourn your passing."
"I'd hate da bother our Chief." Max grimaced shaking his head. "Could I do the living and mourning FOR him?"
"Max!" 99 gaped in shock.
"How bout just the living?"
99 could hear a sigh from beneath the veil like a whisper of a frost laced breeze through the snow covered forests outside before SS-19 continued.
"You vill be glad to know, I find slow, elaborate und painful methods of death distasteful."
Max smiled happily as he turned to 99.
"Well thank heavens for that! See Ninety-Nine? The forces of evil and rottenness can be reasonable!"
"Vee vill simply shoot you both in the head, quickly und efficiently."
As 99 took a deep breath, Max leaned his head forward asking.
"On the other hand, I hear slow, elaborate and painless LIVING is reeeeal popular with all the really COOL organisations of evil these days."
Kerstin stepped up next to SS-19 and levelled her Browning at 99 who closed her eyes while Specchi to Max's right lifted his Beretta M12.
"Vait." SS-19's soft alto tone froze the both of them as effectively as a physical restraint. "Zheir presence is an unknown factor. Zhey might be useful if anysing else happens. Keep zhem alive for now.—" SS-19 addressed Max and 99 as they both breathed out with relief. "—Mister Shmart. Agent Ninety-Nine. It has been a pleasure. Auf Wiedersehen.—" With a parting nod, SS-19 turned and walked away but spoke as she did. "—Kerstin."
Kerstin turned and followed SS-19 and Max and 99 watched as the 2 women walked about halfway back towards the door before stopping to speak out of earshot.
"Zer tumpered Lund Rovers have slowed owver progress." SS-19 whispered shoulder to shoulder with Kerstin.
Kerstin snorted softly looking over her shoulder with a smirk at the 2 CONTROL agents as she replied.
"I have eversing under control. You can take Catargi und Rilski vith you."
SS-19 paused for a moment as she turned ever so slightly, seemingly to look at Max and 99 again via her peripheral vision through her veil. Turning back, she decided.
"Best to be cautious. Do not underestimate him. Rilski ees zer better forklift driver."
Kerstin nodded and with that turned and walked back to the group while SS-19 called out.
"Rilski! Pomognete da zaredite kamionite!"
"Da, komandir!" the slender KAOS agent next to Specchi nodded as he jogged off towards the door with SS-19 following close behind.
As the sliding door closed behind the departing KAOS agents, Max grimaced at Specchi's Beretta M12 that pointed too eagerly at him to his right along with Hayler's MP 40 in front of them with Kerstin's pistol while the stocky Catargi to 99's left had his F1's barrel, shrouded within it's ventilated casing, levelled at her ribs.
In the command centre, Klehr, sitting at the communications console had a large panel opened exposing a mass of internal circuitry with blinking lights and dozens of multi-coloured cables criss-crossing from one point to another. He had several of the wires pulled out and connected to a gray box about 20 inches by 9 inches which featured rows of complex dials, read-outs and 4 short rubber antennas. As Gerd relaxed at the chair next to the body of Major Parish on the floor in the roiling green mist, Klehr used a pair of wire-strippers to peel away the insulation on a gold and red cable before connecting it to a terminal block on the device. After that, he flicked several switches on the gray box and a number of green and yellow lights blinked into life and gauges began flickering.
"Alvight! Zer relay ees veady!" Klehr announced flicking a few switches on the communications console.
"Gut." Gerd nodded getting up and walking over to the angled glass windows to look at the activity down in the green mist filled hangar. "Eet looks like zhey are making gut time despite Shmart's meddling."
Gerd's blue eyes looked up at the swivelling Vulcan cannons in the ceiling of the hangar as Wilson sat at Appleby's weapon console, bare and black leather gloved hands gripping the control columns and manipulating the massive weaponry.
In the hangar, Lorenc spund the wheel of his loaded forklift to point it towards the trailer of Mikhail's W900 on the left and eased the vehicle forward, sliding the forks with the pallet of fuel canisters onto the floor of the trailer along with the other 3 canisters in what was now the 5th row of the pallets.
SS-19 watched the progress as Lorenc reversed his forklift drawing the forks out and almost without any delay, another forklift on the other side driven by Rilski was pulling up to the opened side of the trailer with another pallet of canisters on it's fork to begin forming a 6th row. She turned to see more forklifts driving back into the tunnel while others came speeding out with more pallets of the fuel.
SS-19 turned as Marold, Lacza, Barton, and Baidukov approached her, each one carrying two back packs.
Marold lifted the loaded backpacks as his muffled voice reported through his gas mask.
"Vee haf za X-Tens, velitel. Explosives planted alzo!"
"Where you want these boss?" Barton enquired.
"Sehr gut." SS-19 nodded. "Place vun X-Ten een each lund rover. Zen help vith zer loading of zer fuel."
"Igen parancsnok!" Lacza declared lifting one of his back packs as they all walked off quickly towards the parking lots at the North wall while SS-19 turned back to oversee the trailer being loaded.