Picard: Captain's Log, Stardate...um...Stardate...oh hell! It's the one after yesterday! Captain's Log...did I say the Stardate? The crew appears to be losing it's...dammit!
Blue Lettering: "///?@//"
*on the bridge*
Riker: this doesn't look like a bridge...
Geordi: I think I'm an engineer...they build bridges, right?
Data: this program has performed an illegal operation and must be shut down...this program has performed an illegal operation and must be shut down...*slower and deeper* this p-program has p-p-p-p-p-p-....
Wesley: I have hands! Why aren't I running this place?
Warf: Ar matey...thar be gold in these thar parts...
Troy: *twitching on the ground* BANANAS! I SENSE...BANANAS!!!!!
Ensign Random: We go together like Ramalamalama Kadingadadindadong...
*in sick bay*
Crusher: I'll give you ten seconds to hide and if I find you, I'll give you an old fashioned earth shot...
Medical Officer: uh-oh...
Crusher: one...two...threeeeeeeeee...
Medical Officer: EEEEEP! *hides under Crusher's desk*
Crusher: fourfivesixseveneightnineten! Ready or not, here I come!
Random patient: I see dead people! *covers head with blanket*
Crusher: where? I'll have to give them a shot too!
*whistle thingie*
Ensign Random: this is the bridge! We must sing an old earth folk song together...WE GO TOGETHER LIKE RAMALAMALAMA...
*on board the Klingon Ship Ka'Put*
Klingon Captain: Let's see just how formidable this Enterprise is...fire *zoom in* *pinky on mouth thing* 100 billion slugs!
Klingon First officer: I question your decision! Now I will kill you! AAAAAAAAAAAAURGH! *lunges at Captain*
Klingon Ensign: the Enterprise has opened hailing frequencies! Audio only!
Audio: The eastern world...it is explodin'...violence flarin, bullets loadin'...
*a sense of peace comes over the Klingon crew*
Klingon Ensign: I...I feel...
All on Klingon Ship: PEACE!
*on board Romulan Ship Spiffierthanyou*
Romulan Ensign (or their equivilent): Captain! There is a cloaked Klingon Vessel near the Enterprise! Shall we attack both?
Romulan Commander: Hail them! See if we can attack together!
Romulan Ensign: Hailing them...on screen!
Klingon Crew: Imagine all the people...living liiiiiiiiiiiiiiife in peeeeeeeeeeeeace...
Romulan Subcommander: CUT THE DAMNED SIGNAL!!!
Romulan Ensign: Aye sir! *screams* It won't stop!
Romulan Commander: *covers ears* TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF! My Wax ear tips are melting!
Romulan Subcommander: Mine too!
Romulan Crew: AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!
*We see the Romulan Ship Explode*
*on a Borg Cube*
Borg: We will assimilate the Enterprise...resistance is Futile!
*Borg all come out of their regenerators and start marching around the Cube singing like the green guards from Wizard of Oz* Oh-oh...E-oh-oh...
*back on the Enterprise Bridge*
Troy: Ready? OKAY!
Riker: *that damn "Bring It On" Chant* I'm Sexy, I'm cute, I'm popular to boot!
Enterprise Crew: I'm stylin', great hair, the boys all want to stare!
*Borg appear on their screen*
Crew: I'm wanted, I'm hot, I'm everything you're not!
Borg on the view screen: *sniff* We are the Borg, and you have hurt our feelings! We are TOO hot! We are the Borg, and we want our ship painted like a Rubix cube so we can amuse ourselves when there is nobody left to assimilate!
Crew: Don't hate us 'cause we're beautiful cause we don't like you either!
Borg: THEY HATE US! *sob* we'll have to steal their popularity secrets! *buzzing sounds*
Borg *singing*: whoa yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah... I think I did again...I made you believe we're more than just friends...*all Borg start to dance*
Borg 1: like Oh My God! I like have my individuality like back!
Borg 2: raaaaaaaaaad!
*hailing stops*
*in the Captain's room*
Picard: Stardate 297.2!
*the crew on the Enterprise returns back to normal*
Data: Commander Riker, you might want to see this.
Riker: What is it, Data?
Data: if the sensors are correct, it seems we have given all the Borg their individuality back and made the wax tips of the Romulan's ears melt.
Riker: How is this possible?
Geordi: I'll run a diagnostic.
Data: and commander!
Riker: what?
Data: the Klingon High Council hailed...they said "thanks for the groovy tunes, man."
Riker: *hits comm. badge* Captain, please come to the bridge...you might want to see this.
*Picard enters*
Picard: what is it Number One?
Riker: Data can explain it better than I can.
Data: it appears the Klingon Culture has changed to one resembling San Francisco in the 1970's.
Picard: *horrified* it's become a planet of hippies!
Warf: Peace, man!
Geordi: so withut trying we've solved all the problems of the galaxy.
Picard: Take us out of here, Ensign Random. 3 Warps per hour.
Riker: Sir?
Picard: Engage!
*the Enterprise crawls off the screen like a slug*
THE END!
Blue Lettering: "///?@//"
*on the bridge*
Riker: this doesn't look like a bridge...
Geordi: I think I'm an engineer...they build bridges, right?
Data: this program has performed an illegal operation and must be shut down...this program has performed an illegal operation and must be shut down...*slower and deeper* this p-program has p-p-p-p-p-p-....
Wesley: I have hands! Why aren't I running this place?
Warf: Ar matey...thar be gold in these thar parts...
Troy: *twitching on the ground* BANANAS! I SENSE...BANANAS!!!!!
Ensign Random: We go together like Ramalamalama Kadingadadindadong...
*in sick bay*
Crusher: I'll give you ten seconds to hide and if I find you, I'll give you an old fashioned earth shot...
Medical Officer: uh-oh...
Crusher: one...two...threeeeeeeeee...
Medical Officer: EEEEEP! *hides under Crusher's desk*
Crusher: fourfivesixseveneightnineten! Ready or not, here I come!
Random patient: I see dead people! *covers head with blanket*
Crusher: where? I'll have to give them a shot too!
*whistle thingie*
Ensign Random: this is the bridge! We must sing an old earth folk song together...WE GO TOGETHER LIKE RAMALAMALAMA...
*on board the Klingon Ship Ka'Put*
Klingon Captain: Let's see just how formidable this Enterprise is...fire *zoom in* *pinky on mouth thing* 100 billion slugs!
Klingon First officer: I question your decision! Now I will kill you! AAAAAAAAAAAAURGH! *lunges at Captain*
Klingon Ensign: the Enterprise has opened hailing frequencies! Audio only!
Audio: The eastern world...it is explodin'...violence flarin, bullets loadin'...
*a sense of peace comes over the Klingon crew*
Klingon Ensign: I...I feel...
All on Klingon Ship: PEACE!
*on board Romulan Ship Spiffierthanyou*
Romulan Ensign (or their equivilent): Captain! There is a cloaked Klingon Vessel near the Enterprise! Shall we attack both?
Romulan Commander: Hail them! See if we can attack together!
Romulan Ensign: Hailing them...on screen!
Klingon Crew: Imagine all the people...living liiiiiiiiiiiiiiife in peeeeeeeeeeeeace...
Romulan Subcommander: CUT THE DAMNED SIGNAL!!!
Romulan Ensign: Aye sir! *screams* It won't stop!
Romulan Commander: *covers ears* TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF! My Wax ear tips are melting!
Romulan Subcommander: Mine too!
Romulan Crew: AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!
*We see the Romulan Ship Explode*
*on a Borg Cube*
Borg: We will assimilate the Enterprise...resistance is Futile!
*Borg all come out of their regenerators and start marching around the Cube singing like the green guards from Wizard of Oz* Oh-oh...E-oh-oh...
*back on the Enterprise Bridge*
Troy: Ready? OKAY!
Riker: *that damn "Bring It On" Chant* I'm Sexy, I'm cute, I'm popular to boot!
Enterprise Crew: I'm stylin', great hair, the boys all want to stare!
*Borg appear on their screen*
Crew: I'm wanted, I'm hot, I'm everything you're not!
Borg on the view screen: *sniff* We are the Borg, and you have hurt our feelings! We are TOO hot! We are the Borg, and we want our ship painted like a Rubix cube so we can amuse ourselves when there is nobody left to assimilate!
Crew: Don't hate us 'cause we're beautiful cause we don't like you either!
Borg: THEY HATE US! *sob* we'll have to steal their popularity secrets! *buzzing sounds*
Borg *singing*: whoa yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah... I think I did again...I made you believe we're more than just friends...*all Borg start to dance*
Borg 1: like Oh My God! I like have my individuality like back!
Borg 2: raaaaaaaaaad!
*hailing stops*
*in the Captain's room*
Picard: Stardate 297.2!
*the crew on the Enterprise returns back to normal*
Data: Commander Riker, you might want to see this.
Riker: What is it, Data?
Data: if the sensors are correct, it seems we have given all the Borg their individuality back and made the wax tips of the Romulan's ears melt.
Riker: How is this possible?
Geordi: I'll run a diagnostic.
Data: and commander!
Riker: what?
Data: the Klingon High Council hailed...they said "thanks for the groovy tunes, man."
Riker: *hits comm. badge* Captain, please come to the bridge...you might want to see this.
*Picard enters*
Picard: what is it Number One?
Riker: Data can explain it better than I can.
Data: it appears the Klingon Culture has changed to one resembling San Francisco in the 1970's.
Picard: *horrified* it's become a planet of hippies!
Warf: Peace, man!
Geordi: so withut trying we've solved all the problems of the galaxy.
Picard: Take us out of here, Ensign Random. 3 Warps per hour.
Riker: Sir?
Picard: Engage!
*the Enterprise crawls off the screen like a slug*
THE END!