And The Award Goes To

by The Humbug

This is a very short Kim/Shego pairing story set late in my ‘Who’s Writing This Crap?’ storyline and was inspired by the 2009 Fannie Awards. Kasy Ann and Sheki Go Possible are the creations of NoDrogs and Anna Lipsky is the creation of Yuri18.

And The Award Goes To…

Author: The Humbug

Disclaimer: "Kim Possible" and all characters within © The Walt Disney Company and its related entities. Kim Possible created by Mark McCorkle & Bob Schooley. All rights reserved. No profit is being collected from the fiction contained within. The rest you can blame on me.

Rating: PG-13 for intimations of a physical relationship and intimate contact between consenting adult females, and should also cover a little harsh language now and then. If this will offend you, please read something else and then seek some professional help.

Summary: This is a very short Kim/Shego pairing story set late in my 'Who's Writing This Crap?' storyline and was inspired by the 2009 Fannie Awards. Kasy Ann and Sheki Go Possible are the creations of NoDrogs and Anna Lipsky is the creation of Yuri18. Alexander Rockwaller is my own creation, as are 'GJ' agents Benson and Hedges, though neither they nor Anna appear in the story.

And The Award Goes To…

"SNERK!"

Shego eyed the critter warily as it sat at her kitchen table and vented its sinuses into a dishtowel. The mad wreck of red hair and the familiar pink bathrobe and the somewhat bedraggled bunny slippers supported her conviction that the noisome critter was her beloved wife… but the God-awful sniffles cast some doubt.

"Princess, that towel is…"

"SNORT!"

"… is only going to…"

"… sniffle… cough…"

"… going to make your…"

"HONK!"

"… make your nose sore."

"HOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!"

That the meager chest cavity of world-renowned hero Kim Possible had sufficient capacity for such a prodigious blow defied medical science. The petite woman dabbed tenderly at her face to clean away the residual mess of her most noxious symptom and squinted at her wife standing just beyond a table laden with orange juice and numerous cold remedies.

She opened the towel to expose its contents.

"Do you know any ting srong enuh for dis crap?"

"EW! Gross, Kimmie! Geez!" The pale green woman's disgust was palpable. The sick woman at the table nodded in agreement.

"Tissoos are too flimsy."

"Do you want me to stay home?" And she would have, too. Shego felt little guilt over having an enhanced metabolism and an unearthly resistance to germs; it was the hand she was dealt when she gained her plasma powers. She did, however, feel bad for her Princess when something as simple as the common cold brought down so powerful a force of nature. Kim's health was excellent, otherwise, and this would do little more than lay her up for a day or two.

But on this day of all days to be stuck at home with a cold!

"Nah… I wan you ta go."

"Kimmie, say the word and I'm here."

"But yoor all drezzed up." Kim gestured with the towel, its floral pattern hopelessly splattered with yuck. "An you look zo priddy."

"Oh! Thank you, Pumpkin." The former thief's heart filled; she always received more than her share of compliments from her wife, but they never failed to make her feel good.

Shego was wearing what Kim had once called her 'Miss Go' outfit; the jacket was faded beige tweed over a light blue turtleneck sweater and her modest skirt was the same basic brown as the belt and shoes. Combined with a simple hair band that matched the turtleneck, it was the most conservative outfit Shego owned. It wasn't her green and black mission uniform and it certainly wasn't her most glamorous party dress but it was so conventional and so downright… normal… that hardly anyone noticed her unusual skin tone when she wore the outfit in public. At any rate it was more befitting of a Junior Director of Security for the Middleton contingent of Global Justice.

Kim had also told her that it made Shego look younger… and this was never more appreciated than when faint streaks of white began to subtly appear in Shego's hair.

"Forget the dress. I can wear it any old time."

"But you can't mizza dinner!"

Shego waved that off.

"It's just a silly dinner."

"Iznot! Z'important!" Kim's flushed and slightly snotty expression was incredulous; the dinner was anything but silly and she hadn't missed the annual even in years. It was the Global Justice Service Recognition Banquet and awards were given for service, both exceptional and in terms of lifetime achievement. Kim had received her share of recognition, with more than a few awards bearing her name competing for space on a shelf in the den.

"I bet the mashed potatoes are lumpy."

"You're lumpy!"

"It's gonna be boring."

"Z'not!"

"Snot?"

"Oh, your about az funny aza rubber cruss." Kim prodded her raw nose. "Besides, you're an adminizdrader now. You gotz to be dere." She waved her slender hands. "So scram."

"Would you like me to call someone? See if anyone can stay with you?"

"Naw. And who would you call?" The redhead changed the boogery towel to her other hand and proceeded to count off with her fingers. "Ron's already dere, Bonnie's at home with little Kimberly, Monique probably has plans wit Wade… furdermore, I'm a grown woman who doesn't need to be treated like a child!"

"Oh, that reminds me. I washed your Pandaroo while you were napping. He was getting kinda icky." Shego pointed towards the laundry room. "He's in the dryer."

"Yay! Pandaroo!" Kim lurched down from the chair and padded off, much to her mate's amusement. The ill woman returned seconds later with the stuffed toy tucked in her robe.

"Happy now, Pumpkin?"

"Yep!" She gave the plush toy a hug. "He's still warm!"

"Feeling chilled?" Shego's tone and look were expectant and Kim flinched a bit before answering.

"A little, yes."

"Kimmie…"

"I'm fine! We've got da electric blanket and I've got my flannel jammies. I'll be plenty warm when I go to bed." She reclaimed her seat at the table and sipped more juice. She grimaced at how the cool citrus burned her sore throat but it was the most delicious thing she had tasted. Shego hadn't missed the expression, though.

"Throat hurt?"

"No big. Tanx for the jooce."

"You're welcome."

"I love when it's freshly squeezed." She smacked her lips. "Yum!"

"As you say, 'no big'!"

"So get going, already!"

"Hey," the tall woman threw up her hands. "Don't blame me. I'm waiting on the glamazons."

"Da who?"

"You'll see." The sound of footsteps in the living room behind her brought a knowing smirk to Shego's face. She turned and Kim craned her stiff neck around to see who was about to walk in.

Two figures strode into the lighted archway of the kitchen from the shadowed recesses of the open hall; they were slightly slimmer than the voluptuous Shego but were every inch as tall and svelte and carried themselves with a grace that only world-class athletes could lay claim to. They each wore a form-fitting dress of shiny, tight knit fabric, cut of similar design and with short jackets of different colors that offset of the primary hue of the dress. Identical belts clinched the fabric tight at the narrow waists above shapely hips and enough skin was revealed to verify that they owed half of their existence to the former villain standing beside them. Their faces were narrow with firm chins and high cheekbones, intelligent green eyes like dazzling emeralds and thoughtful mouths that would be as quick to laugh as they would be to snarl if leaping into battle.

The former villain leaned back and shook her head.

"And you always thought that I liked to make a big entrance!"

Kim's eyes traveled from the newcomers' impressive curves down to her modest figure under the shapeless robe. Great, she thought, strapless and probably backless under those jackets. Somebody shoot me.

"Mom, are you sure that you don't want someone to stay home with you? Maybe I could…" Kasy stopped the moment that Kim started shaking her head. The younger redhead's dress was silver and the jacket was golden; this complimented her frizzy bob of fiery red hair.

"No, tank you, sweetness. Your Momma and I have already been over dat."

"We could come home early." Sheki proposed, her metallic green dress reflecting the ceiling light, contrasting against the jacket that was as black and lustrous as the mass of hair that flowed down her back. "Or one of us could arrive late and the other come home early."

"Totally unnecessary. You two can't stay home because you were tagged to present some of da awards tonight. And I've already reminded your Momma dat she can't skip out, eader."

"That blows!"

"Yeah, it won't be the same without you!"

"What am I, chopped liver?" Shego did her best to appear hurt. The façade fell through when Sheki kissed her cheek and Kasy moved around to give her a hug.

"Sorry, Momma."

"You're our favorite!"

"I'm gonna count to ten." Kim raised the crusty dishtowel. "If I don't see 'Team Bimbo' running for da car by da time I reach 'zero' I'm gonna show you what's been coming out of my nose all day long."

"She'll do it, too."

"Gross!"

"One…"

"Mom, that's disgusting!"

"… two… dree… nine…"

"EWWW!" Twin streaks of blazing hotness ran out of the room as quickly as their Gucci's could carry them. Kim winked and smiled at her wife, then peered down into the towel and shuddered before tucking it away.

"Buncha sissies!"

"They can be girly-girls, can't they? We've seen them shred a tank in half, though, didn't we? So we know how tough they are."

"My babies!" Kim gave a silent squee. "But how iz it dat dey can face a fearsome foe…"

"Watch the alliteration, baby. You're not up to it."

"… and dey run screaming from znot goblins?"

"Dunno. We were sick as dogs once and that didn't stop us."

"Yeah, but we were fighting each uder."

"Oh." The pale green woman flushed a bruised purple color. "Yeah, that's true."

"Uh, Shego?"

"Hm?"

"Iz it wrong for me to say dat our babies have really amazing racks?"

"Only if you didn't notice that that also have equally amazing back porches."

"Geez. All grown up."

"Yep. Who'd a thunk it?"

"Twenny years."

"Yep."

"Not fair."

"What?"

"I never looked dat hot at twenny." The green eyes shone like jewels and the bottom lip curled out and down. It didn't have the effect that she'd hoped.

"Oh, Kimmie, don't start that now! We're not stoking your ego tonight."

Moisture filled the eyes and the lip quivered.

"… you don't wuv me…"

"Shitfire, woman! You were trying to chase me out of here a few minutes ago!" Long fingers curled into claws. "Ok! You were beautiful when you were their age. You always have been. Just don't make it sound like you want me to say who I think is the more beautiful, my wife or our children, ok?"

"Oh." That gave Kim pause. "No. No, you're right. Sorry. I didn't realize dat it came across like dat."

Shego smiled.

"It's ok. All three of my women are knockouts. If you ever doubt how I feel about you, just remember that clause I demanded Dr. Director add to my provisional contract way back when."

"Da one dat guaranteed you always waking up next to a certain sexy redhead?"

"I still don't believe that she actually added it!"

"Consider it a late wedding present." She shrugged and the bathrobe was loose on her shoulders; it shifted as Kim raised her hand to her face. "So? You still wuv me?"

"Princess, you are the most beautiful woman I know, both inside and out." Shego looked away and her normal shade of green paled slightly. "Except right now that you're picking your nose." True enough, the former 'girl who could do anything' and current 'woman who can do anything' had her index finger buried in her right nostril up to the second knuckle.

"Dere's one way up in dere dat's da problem…"

"Kimmie, seriously… take your finger out of your nose or I won't touch you ever again." The tone and expression must have hit the target because the petite redhead scowled and withdrew her finger.

"Oh… alright, alright!"

"You make damn sure you wash that hand before we get home."

"Yes, Ma'am." In the meantime, Kim wiped her finger on the dishtowel. "Good ting 'GJ' doesn't allow dates at dese tings."

"Yeah. I'd be keeping an eye on Alexander all night."

"He's a good boy!"

"Yes, but he's definitely a male and he'd be crazy not to want to hit…" Shego caught herself and shuddered. "Ok, ok, sorry! Didn't mean that! Rewind! Erase!"

"I should think so!" Still, Kim had to grin. "Sheki can handle him. What about Anna?"

"Her mother would take care of her for us. Anyway, I suspect that we'd be more likely to protect Anna from Kasy."

"Who said dey could wear dose drezzez?"

"Doy! You did!"

"Dey should need a permit to wear dose!"

"But don't they look beautiful?"

"They glow like you."

"Yes, Princess, but they shine like you." There was no smirk; Shego was intently serious. Kim lowered her face, less to hide her blush than the fact that she didn't trust herself to speak right away. Eventually she sighed.

"You all look absolutely gorgeous while I'z all boogery!"

"Would you be happy if we promised to not have a good time?"

"No, I want you to have a good time." Kim cleared her throat. "Seriously, dough, promise me that you'll be careful and not let dose young recruits give the girls any trouble."

"We'll be fine, Pumpkin. There won't be any trouble." The tall woman smirked. "Most of the senior agents watched them grow up, and if Du, Benson or Hedges can't handle those punks, I'm sure that Uncle Ron will break someone in half if they get too close!"

"Please and… and … and…" The younger woman felt a sneeze coming on. Shego shook her head in sympathy and crossed her arms.

"Kim, are you really sure that you wouldn't like me to stay home with you?"

"HOOOOOOONK!"

"Nice one!"

"Sorry." Kim cleaned her face for the umpteenth time. "I swear dat I'll survive. Besides, Team Possible might be up for an award or something."

"Promise me you'll go straight to bed?"

"Yes." The towel was lowered and the skin beneath was tender and red but clean. "Let me finish my jooce and take a little more cold medicine and I'll hit the sack." She meant it because she was thoroughly exhausted from being sick. In her Uncle Slim's vernacular, she'd been 'shot at and missed, shit at and hit all over'.

Shego uncrossed her arms and collected her purse and car keys from the counter top near the phone.

"Good girl. I hate it when you feel sick!"

"I know. I appreciate dat."

"Sleep tight and we'll do our best not to wake you when we get home."

"Kay!" Kim waved from her seat and Shego, with one last look around the kitchen, waved back and shouldered her purse before turning away. She crossed the darkened living room and casually exited via the front door.

The weary hero groaned to herself and slumped the moment the door closed: she was far more tired than she had let on, afraid to show how terrible she really felt lest her brood and spouse refuse to leave. It was a cold, nothing more, and she was resigned to the much-needed slumber that she usually denied herself on other occasions. Her family could just be so darned overprotective!

Pouring the last of the fresh citrus into her glass, Kim set the empty pitcher aside and opened the bottle of cold medicine. She let a glop of the viscous, green fluid fill the tiny plastic cup that came with each bottle and, raising the stinky concoction to her lips, polished off the shot. As soon as the tremors passed, she poured herself another and sank that one, too.

Blech! Two shots and one hundred ten pounds. Oh yeah, I'll sleep 'til morning.

Kim stood and cleared the table of pitcher, glass and all the over-the-counter cold remedies, placing the medicines back in their particular cabinet and the glassware in the sink. She turned on the hot water to let these two items soak and maybe better for killing the germs.

Behind her, however… in the darkness at both the front door and at the sliding patio door in back… there was motion that would never have gone undetected if she were at her best.

The locks and latches had been skillfully picked as she drank her medicine, and the openings slowly moved aside when she clambered to her feet. The sound of the running water masked the careful steps of seasoned warriors as they crept into the ground level of the Possible residence like a rising tide. These nameless figures had varied origins, with different backgrounds and holding disparate worldviews. They had managed, however, to pool their resources at the prospect of taking down in a combined force their singularly troublesome nemesis in her time of weakness, the one person who had defeated them time and time again in their bids for power… Kimberly Ann Possible.

Weapons locked and loaded and with muscles tensed like coiled springs, they slowly converged on the kitchen.

88888888

Three and a half hours later…

Headlights flared and swerved as Shego's car entered the driveway, briefly illuminating the black interior of the home place from outside. The downstairs remained quiet until the subtle scratching of a key in the lock of the front door announced the return of three quarters of Team Possible.

"Momma, what about…"

"Baby, please don't wake your mother. She's dog tired."

Silhouettes of similar size and shape strolled through the door but didn't bother to flip the nearby light switch; why bother in such a familiar environ?

"Sure, right." Sheki struggled with her load in the darkness. "Sorry. What should we do about all that food?"

"Your sister and I will go back for it in a minute. You go ahead and set the gifts and goody bags on the dining room table." Shego moved aside and let her progeny tiptoe past. She followed closely behind, as did Kasy, and both women struggled to share their cumbersome burden without making any undue noise. They all managed to deposit their respective packages on the large table with very little commotion and they stared at each other in the gloom.

"Quite a haul."

"Is all this stuff because Mom's sick?"

"Some, yeah."

"How'd they know?"

"Baby, please! The rumor mill in 'GJ' is almost as bad as the one among villains!" Shego eyed the mound of swag on the table. "I wouldn't be surprised if the whole damn world doesn't know that she's under the weather. And if it wasn't a well-wisher it was some visiting dignitary from Kersplatistan or Stanstanistan or whatever."

"I know… they all kept coming out of the woodwork. It's almost good that Mom wasn't there."

"Meaning?"

"She'd be bugging from the embarrassment!"

"She hates that sort of thing"

"Well…" Shego waived that off, still keeping her voice down. "I always used to tease her about being a glory hound. Oh, wait, I still do." She waited for the giggles to stop. "But your mother really isn't. The adulation gets awkweird when it's so overwhelming, but she recognizes the need for people to express their gratitude. She smiles her dazzling smile and accepts their praise with her goofy reply." the tall woman shrugged in disgust as the twins shared a grin.

"Wait for it!"

"'No big!'" She snarled. "And stop making me defend the same woman who used to beat the crap out of me!"

"Still, it's so strange."

"Wazzat, baby?"

"That so many people…"

"… after so many years, they…"

"… all still keep asking about her and…"

"… following her… uh, your… exploits… um… together." Sheki caught herself and Shego laughed sardonically.

"Nice save." She sighed and twirled a lock of her daughter's flowing hair around a pale green finger. "It's ok, I'm used to it. Always the sidekick."

"Momma! I wasn't serious!"

"I know. I just love messing with you!" Her smirk was every bit of the old Shego; her daughters might carry the best of her inside them but they never would master that evil glint of the eyes!

"Hello? Food still in the car?" Kasy pointed back to the open doorway. "About a ton of it?"

"Lordy." One sigh came from three throats at the image of what filled the trunk. "We're not going to have enough room in the 'fridge. We'll freeze the meat and all the desserts and cram anything else in the 'fridge for tomorrow." The former villain pursed her black glossed lips. "And for the next several days."

"It's like the whole kitchen staff prepared…"

"… a special banquet just for Mom."

"The sad part is that is that she could eat all of it and not gain an ounce. What's worse is that she's gonna force us to eat most of it and we'll be burning the calories off in plasma for weeks." They were smiling, however, and Shego looked to the daughter who was the very image of her younger self.

"Darn those redheads!"

"Yeah!"

"Hey!" Kasy gave a Pout that didn't accomplish much in the gloom; the fallout was just enough to make her sibling and parent relent.

"Ok, how about 'darn those skinny, little redheads'?"

"That's better."

Shego set her hands on her hips and looked around the darkened hall.

"Nuts."

"What's the sitch, Momma?"

"I can't see! We're gonna need light to bring all that food in here or someone is gonna break their neck… and by 'someone' I mean me." She reached out and snagged her progenies by the waist, leading them to the doorway. "Would a member of Team Babe-age hit the lights on the way out, please and thank you?"

"That's a big can-do." Kasy reached out and casually flipped the switch that would illuminate the foyer and living room, the action resulting in a subtle 'click'.

The three froze, and it was only her decades of experience that granted Shego the ability to find her voice first.

"Kasy, baby, turn the lights back off, please and thank you."

'Click'

The room was plunged into darkness and Shego counted to five while her stunned children held their breath.

"Kasy, lights again, please?"

'Click'

The tableau had not altered.

"I vote we waive the bad language rule."

"Seconded. Those in favor?"

"Aye."

"Aye"

"The ayes have it. Holy shi…"

"Son of a bitc…"

"Mother fu…"

"Ok, that's enough. Your mother would murder us in our sleep." They gazed in silence at what they beheld.

On the floor of their living room, some prostrate and some leaning upright and all thoroughly bound and gagged were several large and impressively outfitted men. They wore black fatigues with what appeared to be plates of body armor incorporated into the fabric. Riot gear hung from body harnesses and they were silent but breathing. None of them appeared to be fully conscious and the more reflective pieces of their body armor flared green when three plasma emissions burst into life.

"Sheki! Go check on…!"

"On it!" The young woman had already kicked off her shoes and raced towards the steps, taking to at a time as she made her way to the second floor. Her mother and her twin stayed behind and moved closer to the men, battle-ready with hands poised to deliver a plasma-charged blow if the sitch warranted it. Shego inspected the simple lock-tie bindings with a practiced eye while her remaining daughter tallied up the number of mysterious strangers sacked out among the sofa, the recliners and the end tables.

"Who are these chumps, do you think?"

"Dunno… four, five… seven… nine…"

"Any of them able to answer a few questions?"

"… eleven, twelve… No, ma'am, but we've got this," the young redhead pointed to a pile of formidable looking weapons stacked neatly on the coffee table.

"Nah, sweetie, that just raises more questions." The tall woman threaded her way around bodies until she could see the pile in more detail. The knives gleamed and the handguns were a glossy black… which made the bright pink notepaper standout that much better.

"Note!"

"Where?"

"Table… under the double-A-twelve automatic shotgun." Shego circled around and homed in on the table. She plucked the pink sheet out from under the black stock of the weapon and gingerly stepped over the recumbent forms to meet her daughter near the stairs.

"Honey, please go up and help your sister." The last word was still on her tongue when a pair of long, powerful legs sheathed in a shiny green dress came down the stairs.

"Sheki?"

"Here. Sorry I took so long."

"What's the sitch?"

"Safe and sound." The tall girl was almost casual. "I freaked for a sec' when I looked in your room and didn't see her. She's in the guest room." She shrugged at their curious stares. "Hey, don't ask me. She's out like a light and snoring like a Husqvarna chorus."

"But she's ok?"

"Looks that way to me… but she's fully dressed and almost buried under a crap load of blankets."

"Damn it, she's chilled. I knew she felt worse than she let on. I should've stayed home." Long pale green fingers reached down and lifted the pink paper; Shego held it close to her face before shaking her head and blinking rapidly.

"Ow… Someone hand me my purse, please." She let her eyes relax while the bag was retrieved and she fished her reading glasses out of their zippered pouch.

"Your mother should've gone into medicine like your Grandma."

"Why?"

"Because she can't write for shit. Would've made a great pharmacist." Shego rested the spectacles across the bridge of her nose and, with a huff, started to read the note. "'Dear Team Hawtness… Team Sicko gone to bed… hope all had great time, so proud of you… let glass & pitcher soak overnight to kill germies, P&TY…"

"Doesn't she say anything…"

"… about the goons on the floor?"

"Not yet." Shego peered at the note, squinting at the chicken scratch. "Wait, here's something… 'had to take care of some stuff before bed… washed our bedclothes and changed sheets… don't want you sick too.'"

"Maybe that why…"

"… she's in the guest room!"

"'Sleeping in guest room so won't infect you'" Shego continued with a rueful grin. "'Cold and snotty so stay away… wuv you all & see you if I live through the night'."

"What?!"

"Relax, she drew a little smiley face next to it." Shego held up the note so that Kasy could see the tiny doodle. "See?"

"Momma, there's something written on the back."

"Hm?" The former villain turned the paper and saw the added scrawl. "Indeed there is." She sighed at sloppy printing. "'P-S… Shego, please add lock ties to shopping list 'cause we're all out… had to use your fluffy handcuffs on a-hole by TV…'"

Shego felt the heat of her own blush rise up her neck and onto her cheeks. Her second realization was that her daughters were standing nearby with expressions of thinly veiled amusement on their faces. She turned her head casually and glanced past the rest of the bound forms until she singled out the large and fearsomely outfitted man at the base of the entertainment center.

Yes, there were the cuffs and there was the obvious attempt to not giggle coming from behind her. Nuts… she shrugged that off and closed her eyes, only opening them after her heart rate had slowed from the initial shock as seeing so many would-be assassins unconscious and hog-tied on her living room floor. So many men, each armed and dangerous, and no one left at home but her sick, little Pumpkin.

Shego crossed her arms and shivered; her face grew warm and her eyes burned… and at the same moment she felt so proud of her wife that she could jump for joy.

"… oh, Kimmie…"

"Momma?"

"Hm?"

"What now?"

"What now, sugarplum, is that we need a 'GJ' cleanup crew." Their Momma removed her glasses and glanced at the clock, the hour being terribly late. "It looks like your Mother had a party all by herself."

"Agent Du is gonna…"

"… have a shit fit when he…"

"… hears about this!"

"You got that right, ladies."

"Did anyone else notice that everything is neat?" Sheki gestured about the room and they looked for any visible evidence of a scuffle but there was none to be seen. Shego grew thoughtful and looked all about them.

"'Aye… and though we hunted high and low, and hunted everywhere…'"

"What's that, Momma?"

"'Flannan Isle' by Wilfrid Gibson."

"Who?"

"Wilfrid Gibson… 'and though we hunted high and low, and hunted everywhere… of the three men's fate we found no trace… of any kind in any place, but a door ajar, and an untouched meal… and an over-toppled chair'."

The twins shared a puzzled look.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning that it pisses me off when she does this."

"What do we do about Mom?"

"Your Mom has had quite enough excitement for the evening." Shego smirked and shook her head ruefully, pocketing the note for documentation later. "We'll let her sleep straight through."

"What can we do?" The words were Kasi's but they were both ready for action. Their mother removed her jacket and laid it over the back of a chair and she casually walked to the kitchen, glancing back at her daughters over her shoulder.

"There should be a Kimmunicator on the dining room table, so if one of you could put a call in to 'GJ' for that clean-up crew, that would be spank'n." Shego scowled. Damn those goofy phrases! She walked up to the refrigerator and opened the large door to remove a plastic mesh bag from the lowest shelf. The girls watched her with mild curiosity.

"What are you going to do?"

Shego held up the bag of oranges before answering.

"I am going to make some more of that freshly squeezed juice that your Mother loves so much. She's earned it tonight, don'tcha think?" The former villain located the juicer and set out a clean pitcher and the cutting board and a pairing knife before unbuttoning her cuffs and rolling up her sleeves. "And don't be surprised if I have the sniffles tomorrow morning."

"Huh?"

"Why?"

"Because, my tall, pale and beautiful bubble-butts, I have a stable body temperature of one hundred and one degrees because of my metahuman nature… so I'm not just 'hawt', I'm H-O-T." She sliced into her first orange. "And I know someone that could probably use a little extra warmth right about now!"

Da End

Author's Notes: The misspellings during Kim's dialog are intentional; it was my attempt to transcribe a head cold. As mentioned in the Summary, the 2009 Fannies and the chaos they create were my inspiration; best of luck to the Nominees!

As I wrote in 'My Last Kim Possible Story', I always envisioned Shego becoming a member of the internal 'GJ' security detail while Kim retained her Independent Operative status. Unlike some of our peers, I just cannot see Kim ever taking Dr. Director's place.

The 'shot at and missed' phrase was one that my Dad always used to say when he was feeling ragged and run-down. It's quite appropriate. When I'm sick… which is very rare… I always take two shots of the green, nighttime cold medicine, then make certain that I'm near a comfortable sleeping spot about a half hour later!

Fans of old school Doctor Who should recognize the reference to Flannen Isle.