Title : I Hate You
Author : Ila Way!
Fandom: Katekyo Hitman Reborn!
Pairing: 6927
Disclaimer: I do not own Kateikyoushi Hitman REBORN! This is a work of fanfiction, and I am not making any financial profit from it.
I HATE YOU
Acknowledge my heart once more
Accept these tears that are for you
Not even expecting love
The ended story, the past story
Mukuro eyed the couple he just saw. The girl was smiling happily and the boy was talking about things that he didn't bother to hear or know. The sight was hurting him and he punched the wall next to him as he felt slight pain that slowly pierce his heart. He used to love and be loved back. He used to smile like that girl when his lover talked about random things and about his day. He used to like his lover's presence as he watched his lover laughed and smiled next to him. Those brown eyes, it was the most beautiful eyes he had ever set his eyes on. It was big and shy and the way his lover would look at him was so cute. Tsuna could never look at him for more than a minute. Tsuna had said something about being shy and felt awkward when he did so and he would laugh at him before kissing him on the cheek for being so cute.
Tsuna… Tsunayoshi…
Yes, that was his lover's name or more correctly, ex-lover now. He felt the pain continued to strike him from the inside. Not wanting to kill everyone or every couple he saw, he went back home, to a place where he could trash himself alone. He walked past the couple and continued walking, ignoring them. He didn't want to remember about his memories again. On his way back home, he saw a familiar brown hair and eyes who smiled happily with another man who he called as his new lover while eating ice cream. The raven haired boy, Hibari Kyouya, as he remembered the name was eating a vanilla ice cream too and he was listening to what the brown haired boy's talking. They looked happy and Mukuro felt his heart burns. He quickly walked pass the couple, avoiding any attention from them. When he was far away from the couple, he noticed that he was standing on a bridge and he looked back to see the two lovers' back.
I hate you to death (even more you, who are like this)
I hate myself to death (even more me, who is like this)
Just one more time, one more time, look at me
Now I'm crying
He hated him, that Tsunayoshi. He hated how Tsuna would always say that he loves him but he left him for another guy. He stared at the two lovers' back. Tsuna was being all happy and he moved around a lot. Tsuna would always do that back then when he was with him. Then, suddenly Tsuna stopped walking and he fell. Out of reflex, Mukuro ran to the younger boy to help him but he stopped running when he saw Hibari kneeled down and held the younger boy's shoulder as he shook the boy lightly. Tsuna looked up to the worried Hibari and seeing that Tsuna responded, he hugged the petite boy. His face was showing how worried he was and he held the boy protectively.
Mukuro wondered what happened and suddenly he too was worried. Tsuna would faint so easily lately. He used to saw Tsuna fell and fainted on the ground before they broke up too. And at those times, he would do what Hibari does. He would ask Tsuna if he was okay and when the boy replied he'd hug the boy protectively to calm his own thundering heartbeat. He was always scared when Tsuna suddenly fainted. He was scared of Tsuna might leave him. He was scared that Tsuna was not okay. He was always scared because he loved the boy so damn much. In fact too much that he was still worried about the boy even after they broke up.
He loved him too much that he still felt the thundering heartbeat when he saw Tsuna fell back there. And he wondered why the hell he still cares about that boy. He shouldn't anymore. Not when Tsuna broke his heart and tore it to pieces.
I hate you so much I could die, I hate you
I hate myself so much I could go crazy, I hate myself
I hate myself for being like this
He hated that boy so much he thought he'd just die hating him. He hated that boy so much that it pained his heart more than nothing else. But why does he still long for that boy's touch? Why did he dream of kissing the boy every night? Why did he even care to spare a look to the boy whenever he sees him? And why the hell that he not only spare a look but would just stare at the boy until the boy was lost from his sight? Why the hell that he did that?
Because he hated him so much he's started to go crazy.
That's what he wanted to believe. He wanted to believe that he doesn't love the boy anymore. He wanted to believe that he will never love that boy back but every time he thought of it, his heart would hurt so much, betraying him. He stared at Hibari who helped Tsuna to stand up again. Tsuna thanked Hibari for helping and smiled to the boy. Hibari sighed in relief and smiled back. They looked so perfect together. Mukuro even wondered if it was actually better for Tsuna to have Hibari as his new lover. Maybe he wasn't the right one for Tsuna.
Stop your heart that's turned away
Accept this gaze that is looking at you
Not even expecting love
The ended story, the past story
He didn't realize the gaze Hibari directed to him. Because he was too busy in his mind and too busy watching Tsuna's back. He snapped back from his own thoughts when Tsuna too looked back, revealing his large eyes that almost look like girls. He was staring at Mukuro back and Mukuro was stoned. It had been so long. It had been too long since the last time Tsuna looked at him. Usually it was only him who would secretly look at the brown haired boy. But that look pained him. Tsuna's gaze was almost pleading. Pleading to what, he didn't know. And he decided not to know. Not in million years. He hated the boy and he would hate him forever.
And when the couple didn't stop staring at him, he broke his gaze and turned back as he left the bridge slowly back to his apartment. He felt regret suddenly. He regretted his retreat because that look Tsuna was giving was something the he didn't usually see. Then again, what he was supposed to do? Should he go there and ask Tsuna what the hell he wanted? No. He will never show any weakness to Tsuna and Hibari. Never.
I hate you to death (even more you, who are like this)
I hate myself to death (even more me, who is like this)
Just one more time, one more time, look at me
Now I'm crying
When he got home he went straight to his bed. He pulled a pillow and covered his face with it. He hated that boy. He really hated him. He hated Tsuna to the brink of insanity. Even though he was known to be the guy that doesn't give a damn about anyone else, he does have a heart and this heart, he hated it so much because it was betraying him right from the start. It betrayed him to love the brunette. It betrayed him to believe that Tsuna would always be his. It even betrayed him when he broke up with Tsuna. It pumped so hard that he thought he would die of the pain.
That of course will never happen.
He held the pillow and threw it away, with anger evident in his face. He hated him. He hated the brunette. He hated him so much. But even with this much of hate he had never done anything to the brunette. All those touches, all those kisses were nothing. Tsuna had played his heart. He never loved him even though he said that he did. He stared at the ceiling, his body was hot from the anger and frustration.
The first time he met Tsuna was at the hospital. He was visiting Chrome and when he was waiting for Chrome's daily check up, he went to the café to buy some cold drinks for himself. When he was on his way to go there, he saw a brown haired boy who fumbled with medicines on his hand. One of he pill bottles fell and Mukuro picked it up chuckling at the clumsy brunette. Tsuna smiled at Mukuro and thanked him for his help.
"Aren't those medicines are too much for a person?" asked Mukuro. He wondered why this brunette was holding a lot of medicines.
"Ah… Yes, but these are not for a person. It's for five. I'm distributing it," smiled the brunette.
Mukuro laughed at this. He thought it was the brunette's because the brunette looked somewhat pale so he thought he was sick. "Well, I thought it was yours. You look sick."
"Ah, well… I'm the pharmacist here and last night I had to work because my friend had something important to do so… yeah probably I look sick because I'm tired," he smiled weakly.
"Doesn't pharmacist stay where they are and the patients will come to your place to take the medicine themselves?" asked Mukuro again.
"Well, because I was up all night I didn't feel like staying at the same place for long. Or else I'd fell asleep.. haha… Oh! By the way, why are you here? Are you sick?" asked Tsuna back, wondering.
Mukuro chuckled at the question, "Do I look sick, miss?" and answered the question with another question. This boy certainly looks like a girl. If he doesn't really pay attention to him, he'd thought that this brunette a girl. A cute one at that.
"Eh? Uh… you certainly do not. Well, then you must be visiting somebody, right?"
"Good guess. That's right," replied the blue haired man.
"Who are you visiting?"
"Chrome, somebody so dear to me."
"Your girlfriend?" asked Tsuna.
"No. I'm gay," laughed Mukuro.
"So… this Chrome person is a guy?" Tsuna asked again.
Mukuro laughed right there and then. This boy was so funny. Then he leaned closer to the brunette. "Well, Chrome is a she."
"Oh… I see," Tsuna said as he blushed a bit.
"By the way, my name's Mukuro. Rokudo Mukuro," said the blue haired man, offering a hand to the brunette.
"Oh! Well, nice to meet you, I'm Tsuna, Sawada Tsunayoshi," replied the brunette who took the offered hand hesitantly.
I hate you so much I could die, I hate you
I hate myself so much I could go crazy, I hate myself
I hate myself for being like this
It had been great. He had went out with the brunette few times before the brunette confessed to him that night. And that night too he had taken the brunette's first kiss. He loved how the brunette tasted. He had loved those hands and that soft skin. He had loved his smile and his pouting face. He had loved the look Tsuna would give him when he teased him. But everything turned sour when Tsuna came to him the other day. It was a cold night and he was happy to see his lover. But when he saw his lover's hand was laced with another man's, his smile started to wear off.
"Tsunayoshi?" he asked Tsuna, eyes asking hundreds of question in silence.
It seems that Tsuna knows what he asked inside as Tsuna plainly said, "Mukuro, we need to break up."
Mukuro's eyes widened. He felt blood suddenly rushes into his head and his heart was pumping a bit too fast to his liking. "What?"
"I know you heard me, Mukuro. We need to break up."
"But why? Is it because of that guy next to you?" Mukuro glared at the raven haired boy who just stared coldly back to him.
"Yes." One word. A word that made him so mad. He was so mad that he lunged forward to punch the raven haired boy. But the punch didn't make it as he was hit by a tonfa which sent him flying to the right. He saw Tsuna voiced out his protests on beating him to the raven haired boy.
"Hibari-san! Stop! Please don't hurt him!"
So… that guy's name is Hibari. He rose up and went back to punch the man with the name of Hibari but his second attempt failed when he was hit by the same tonfa again. Then before he could do anything he was sent few meters away with a strong kick from the raven haired man who glared at him.
"Herbivore, stop trying. Or I shall bite you to death," said Hibari. His eyes were cold, as cold as the weather. But of course, that didn't do anything as Mukuro took out his trident and went into a fight with Hibari.
"STOP! MUKURO! HIBARI-SAN! STOP!"
Both of them stopped and they look back to the now teary brunette. He was holding his tears. "Please… Mukuro… I just… can't be with you anymore… Please… let me go… Forget me…," he said before his tears slide down his pale complexion. Mukuro stared at the brunette. He wanted to hold him and asked him why but Hibari went to Tsuna faster and he held the crying boy.
"I see… If that's what you wanted, Tsunayoshi…"
He then left the scene. He couldn't bear to see Tsuna cry. And he couldn't bear to see his lover in other's arms. It hurts him more than he thought it would be. He remembered that time tears suddenly fell. He doesn't know why but it just did. It's not like he was crying. He did not. Rokudo Mukuro does not cry. And he was not. But it hurts so much.
Baby, come back to my world
Come back and be my girl
If you don't, know that I'll hate you to death
Before this heart that has loved you turn into hate
Come back quickly. That you're sorry, please tell me
He remembered it, back then. It was last month when he went to see Tsuna again. Tsuna was alone when he saw him at the café. He was staring at his hot and steamy drink. Mukuro took the seat in front of brunette. The brunette was shocked with the sudden personal bubble invasion and looked up to see a familiar face. He then frowned and sat straighter. He only stared at the invader who also had a frown on.
When Tsuna said nothing, Mukuro started first. "Tsunayoshi…"
Tsuna only stared at him though his gaze slowly turned vacant. And Tsuna fainted again. Mukuro had been shocked and he shook the boy softly, "Tsunayoshi… Tsunayoshi…"
Tsuna's consciousness went back. He took Mukuro's hand and lifted it up to his cheek. "I'm sorry, Mukuro." Mukuro's heart pained with the apology. He wanted to hold the petite boy right there but his action was halted when Tsuna let go of his hand, "I have someone else now so… stop looking for me and stop loving me…"
Look at me once more, locking our gazes
Hold me once more, locking our lips
Once more, once more, look at me
Look at me, me, me
He went out that night to go to Tsuna's apartment. And when he arrived, nobody was there. He could just leave but he went inside. He knew where Tsuna hide his spare key and he took it, entering the apartment. It was a bit messy than usual. He went further to Tsuna's bedroom. He had so much memory here. His memory with Tsuna. They had kissed there before. They had even made love there. That picture of him and Tsuna were still there. But he didn't care anymore. He stayed there and waited for his prey.
When Tsuna arrived home, he was so tired he didn't notice that there was someone else beside him in the room. When he lied on his bed, he heard the door clicked and there was Mukuro, coming closer to him after he locked the door. Tsuna's eyes widened at the sight. "M-Mukuro?"
"Kufufu, my pretty Tsunayoshi…"
"What are you doing here?" Tsuna asked as he stood up.
"Nothing much. Just came here to tell you that… I hate you," replied the blue haired man, his face was stern and he did not smile at all.
I hate you so much I could die, I hate you
I hate myself so much I could go crazy, I hate myself
I hate myself for being like this
"Stop! Stop there!" Tsuna commanded as he took his cell phone and speed dialed Hibari.
"Oya, Tsunayoshi, why are you so scared?" pouted Mukuro fakely as he came closer and closer to the now scared brunette.
"Hello?" A sound was heard from Tsuna's cell phone. Hibari's voice.
Mukuro glared at the brunette. "Calling your boyfriend, Tsunayoshi? I don't like it…"
Mukuro lunged forward and grabbed the brunette's hand and forced him onto the bed. Tsuna screamed and Mukuro smirked at it. "Tsunayoshi…"
Tsuna stared at him wide eyed. Mukuro smirked and kissed the brunette with force. Tsuna tried to break free from the other's grip but it was useless. Mukuro was too strong. Mukuro then broke up the kiss. "Tsunayoshi… Look at me and tell me that you're sorry."
Tsuna stared at him again but he didn't do what Mukuro said so he was kissed once again this time rather roughly. And this time Mukuro kissed him long until he can't breathe and when he almost passed out, Mukuro broke the kiss. "Tsunayoshi… open your eyes and look at me…"
"Mukuro…"
"Yes, it's me…" smirked Mukuro. Oh, he's having fun now. This is so fun that his heart started to thump like crazy. This is so fun that his heart too started hurting.
"I'm sorry…"
"Good…" Mukuro smiled. "Now, Tsunayoshi… tell me that that you love me."
"No… Mukuro… Please…"
"Hmm? Wrong… You should tell me that you love me now, Tsunayoshi."
"No… Mukuro…. Please… Let me go…," Tsuna pleaded, his eyes were teary. He felt hopeless.
"I hate you, Tsunayoshi." Mukuro kissed the boy for the last time. A long, passionate kiss that lasted until he almost passed out himself. And when he felt Tsuna gasping, he lifted up the knife and stabbed Tsuna right into his heart. At first Tsuna struggled a bit but then after the second and the third stab, Tsuna limped out and he stopped moving. When Tsuna stopped moving, Mukuro let go of the boy's hand and broke the kiss.
Tsuna was pretty with blood all over his body. Tsuna was pretty with those cloudy eyes, probably staring at him. But why are those stares look so… sad? He should look frightened, not sad. There are traces of tears and Mukuro wiped it off. He then too cried a bit before whispering to the dead Tsuna, "I hate you. I hate that you made me like this."
It was then Hibari came barge in to the room. He panted and he glared at the blue haired man angrily when he saw the dead Tsuna on the bed. The red blood ticked down like seconds ticked by.
"Rokudo Mukuro. You shall be bitten to death now," he said with angry glare and he lunged forward to really kill the man.
Mukuro dodge the tonfa and kicked Hibari which sent the disciplinarian flying to the wall. "You have nothing to do with this! You better leave before I kill you too," Mukuro too was angry with the sudden intrusion.
"Tch, you know nothing, Rokudo Mukuro," Hibari said as he get up and started to attack the man again.
"What else do I need to know? About you?" he asked teasingly.
"Why Tsuna left you, herbivore," Hibari replied between the attacks.
"I don't want to know and I don't care," Mukuro said, kicking to Hibari's direction.
Hibari dodge the kick and said, "Even if you don't kill him, he'll die anyway this month."
"And why is that? He has a brain tumor or something?" asked Mukuro, glaring at the raven haired man.
"True. He does have that." Hibari was calm. A bit too calm to Mukuro's liking. He was angry and he started to hate this man too.
I hate you so much I could die, I hate you
I hate myself so much I could go crazy, I hate myself
I hate myself for being like this
"Enough with all the lies." Mukuro was mad. His face was red with frustration and anger. Hibari shouldn't say anything like that! Tsunayoshi doesn't have brain tumor! He doesn't have them! He never told him and… he never told him…
"You knew but you never really does." Hibari kicked Mukuro right on the left knee. Mukuro lose balance and fell on his right knee. He glared to the disciplinarian angrily.
That's when he felt pain strike him right in the heart. And it wasn't Hibari who's causing it. He hated it.
A sudden realization hit him. Tsuna had a brain tumor and he will die within this month. He knew something was wrong right from the beginning. He should have checked. He had asked Tsuna about his illness but Tsuna always tell him that it's nothing and it was because he was born weak or something. When he insisted to have Tsuna get a medical check up with him, Tsuna would always brush it off, telling him that it was really nothing and made him forget about it with kisses. Those kisses that made him forget everything.
Tsuna had a brain tumor.
He was going to die.
He broke up with him.
And who the hell is this Hibari?
"Who the hell are you?" Mukuro asked.
"Me? Heh, I'm his cousin," he lied. Mukuro doesn't have to know. It doesn't matter who he is now. What matters was… nothing really. But he just felt like letting this man know. Probably it just felt right that time. Or probably he just wanted this man to regret what he had just done. He should regret killing Tsunayoshi. And he should take this as a part of his punishment. Hibari jumped, backward to evade Mukuro's attacks. From what he could see, Mukuro's not as serious anymore. He seems to be in deep thoughts.
Cousin? Like him and Chrome?
Mukuro stopped attacking suddenly and he was sent flying with a violent hit on his stomach. He rose up, coughing and went back to the dead body lying on the bed. Hibari too stopped attacking and just stared at him.
"Tsunayoshi… I hate you…" he cried. "I hate you. I hate that you never told me…"
Hate you, hate you, hate you, hate you
Enough to go crazy, I hate myself for being like this
He stroked the pale cheek and took out the knife slowly, so slow like he's afraid that he might hurt Tsuna again. "I hate you… Tsunayoshi…"
"I hate you so much… that I hated myself being like this…" he cried and after the last sentence he stabbed himself. Hibari took out his phone and called the ambulance as fast as he could. The blood are all over the two boys and he rushed straight to the bleeding man and tried to give him first aid. Tsunayoshi has a last wish and he left it with Hibari. And he can't just let this man die. There are reasons he's doing this and that's for Tsunayoshi and this man himself. He sighed. He hated this. And when he was trying to stop the bleeding he saw tears fell from Mukuro's closed eyes and he had this face like he was being rejected. Hibari ignored them and went back to his task before he heard soft voice coming from Mukuro saying,
"I hate you… Tsunayoshi…"
AN: First of all, it's not my fault. My fingers and brain typed it without me realizing it. Probably because I'm crazy over this song. Yeah, it's a song, I hate you by 2PM. If you must know they are Korean. xD My sister and my cousin drag me into liking Korean artist. By the way this song rocks. xD But this fic... I don't know.... when I asked my sister to read it she commented... I HATE TSUNA. haha!
....
AHHHH! MUKURO!!! I'M SORRY!!!!