Note: I read a lot, but this is my first venture into writing fanfic, so please be nice and don't expect a masterpiece.
Jane was NOT a happy camper when she found out that her mother's "birthday present" turned out to be a ticket for a singles cruise that she had won in a raffle, but Jane couldn't refuse the look on Angela's face. Sighing, she reluctantly agreed to go. Angela grinned and threw her arms around her daughter, who tried to fend off her overly excited parent.
"Ma! No hugging! No!" Sometimes Jane thought an outsider might believe she was speaking to a dog.
Her brother Frankie tried unsuccessfully to hide his laughter behind a mouthful of lasagne, but Tommy, the youngest sibling, smiled and said, "What could be bad, Jane? Two full weeks of hot chicks in bikinis on beautiful beaches…" His voice trailed off as he imagined the scene.
Jane rolled her eyes. "Try two weeks full of old hairy men wearing speedos. In the hot tub. Together."
"Ew. I see what you mean," Tommy replied. "Is the alcohol free at least?"
Frankie chuckled and chimed in, "Well if it's not, I'm sure Janie can find some hairy old man to buy her drinks…or whatever."
"Boys! Be nice." Angela interrupted. "And Janie, don't assume that all the men will be old and hairy. I know how you feel about body hair, but still – the love of your life could be on this cruise and if you don't go, you'll never meet him!"
"Ma, if I find the love of my life on this cruise, when I come back, I'm going to buy you a house."
"Janie, have some faith!" Angela didn't always appreciate her daughter's snarkiness/sarcasm. "If you don't have a positive attitude, then you'll always end up in the negative."
Tommy tried to rescue his sister. "Ma, have you been spending too much time in the self-help section of the bookstore again?"
"There's nothing wrong with a little motivational help. Just look at your AA meetings." Angela was not always the most tactful individual.
Jane's phone buzzed, and she rose to check the message. "And on that happy note, I'm off to work." She took the cruise paperwork with her to see if she could find a way out of this mess.
After her work at the crime scene concluded, Jane returned to the station. Frost, her partner, and Korsack, her former partner, were already there. After chasing down some dead end leads, the three decided to call it a night and go for a beer at the Dirty Robber.
Sitting at the booth, Jane looked at the depressed faces of her friends and decided to lighten the mood. "So guys, I got another problem you can help me solve. Hopefully it won't be as difficult as this murder."
"What did your mother do this time, Janie?" Korsack knew Jane and her family very well.
Jane smirked and pulled out the cruise packet her mother had given her. Korsack suspiciously opened the large envelope and focused on the cruise ticket. "Woah, Janie! Your mother is sending you on a Carribean cruise?"
"Yeah sounded great until she told me it's a SINGLES cruise. Can you believe that shit?" Jane's anger at her mother's interference with her personal life was obvious to the older man.
"Old hairy men in speedos. Gonna be rough, Jane." Frost finally voiced his opinion on the matter, briefly looking up from his examination of the fine print on the cruise agreement to glance meaningfully at Korsack's abundant midsection. Korsack frowned back at him.
Jane laughed. "See, now that's exactly what I said!"
"So when do you leave?" Korsack asked.
"Three weeks from tomorrow," Jane replied. "So we've got 22 days to figure out how I can get out of this."
"We?" Frost laughed. "Well, I hate to tell you this, Jane, but if you told your mother you were going to go, you know she's going to throw you onto that boat herself if she has to." Korsack nodded in agreement.
Jane sighed and rolled her eyes. "Sometimes I really hate my family. Anyone up for doing shots tonight?"
[Three weeks later]
"Ma, you didn't have to come all the way out here to see me off." Jane's annoyed tone was obvious. "I'm a big girl; I can check in on my own."
"I know, Janie, I just want to make sure you get on the boat safely, that's all," Angela replied sweetly, putting her arms around her daughter.
Jane struggled out of the embrace and took a deep breath to try and calm down. "Right. I'm sure that's ALL you're here for." Jane rolled her eyes and looked around. Surprised, her breath caught in her throat as she noticed a stunning woman walking up the gangway in 3 inch heels, her strawberry blonde hair blowing in the wind and her emerald green dress clinging to her hips.
"Jane, what are you looking at?" Angela asked. "Jane? Janie?" Her voice rose in volume as Jane ignored the question. Angela peered around, seeing a handsome man with a military bearing boarding the ship. "Ooooh, Janie! He's very attractive!" Angela grabbed her daughter's arm.
"Huh? Who?" Jane finally noticed that her mother was trying to get her attention.
"Last call for boarding!" The announcement rang out on the dock.
"Oh, Janie, you're going to have such a good time, but I'm going to miss you!" Angela tightly hugged her daughter, tears forming in her eyes.
"Ok, Ma, I gotta get on board now." Jane hugged her mother back only briefly before taking
"Love you, Janie!" Angela called out.
"You too, Ma," Jane muttered. Even if you are hopelessly interfering, she finished the sentence in her head.
At the end of the gangway, Jane showed the steward her ticket and was directed to her stateroom. On the way, she caught a glimpse of the green dress and red-blonde hair out of the corner of her eye and smiled slowly. Perhaps this cruise will be more interesting than I had anticipated, she thought.
Note: So, should I continue? Thoughts and comments are always appreciated, unless they're mean.