Chapter 1: This wasn't the first time-

This wasn't the first time my so called mother was late from coming home from work. She was actually way past late from coming home. 4 hours late. But me and my brother I guess got used to it. We somewhat expected it. Alec would start our dinner, and I would straighten up a little and we would talk about our day. I hadn't much to talk about. Unlike Alec who was quarterback of our school team, total hotty (words from other girls) and incredibly smart. Then there's me. Light hair blue eyed freak which happened to be the twin to the hottest guy in the world. I'm not smart and definitely not pretty. It must be hard for Alec always having to be paired with me. Total hunk and his anti social twin sister. Story of my life.

"Are you finished?" Alec asked as he got up with his plate.

"Yeah I'm done" I said handing him my full plate.

"You didn't eat much" he said as he scraped the scraps in our dogs' bowl.

"Just not hungry" I said quietly.

"You okay" he urged.

As I was getting ready to mumble some excuse, my mother pulled in the driveway. Her truck roared and then slowly dwindled to a muffle. The car door slammed shut. A shady figure was in the passenger's seat. The passenger door quickly opened to then reveal a man. A very tall and very dirty man. He wrapped his hand around my drunk mother's waist, moving his hand closer and closer south. She giggled as she opened the front door to our one bedroom house.

I looked at the clock 10:53 p.m.

Normally we would have eaten earlier, but Alec had football practice. So I attempted my algebra homework during that time. I did 1 problem and then said to hell with it. That would explain my d+ in that class. My mother looked at us both. Her eyes looked desperate. She wanted someone to love.

"Hello kids" my mother said flinging her purse and coat on the love seat.

"Hey mom" Alec said.

"Hey" I mumbled under my breath.

"What's for dinner?" She asked grabbing the mans arm.

"Chicken" Alec replied.

"This is Ray, he drives a truck for Bud light, and so I met him at his delivery" my mom said smiling at him.

"Well say hello" she added.

"Hi" Alec and I said at the same time. His hi seemed more cheerful then mine.

I went to get up, and then Alec grabbed my arm and whispered

"Don't leave me here by myself".

"Fine" I whispered back and sat back down in my chair. My mother was heating up a plate of chicken for herself and Ray. Ray was a tall man; he had dark brown hair and a mustache. His eyes were very wide and looked too large for his face.

"Well its nice to meet you to" Ray said.

"Your mother talks about you all the time" he added.

"I find that very hard to believe mumbled.

"Did you say something"? Ray asked.

"Nope not a word, I gotta go upstairs, its getting late" I said as I got up again.

Alec gave me the sternest look ever. I laughed inside.

The truth is I never go to bed this early. I usually wait till like 2:00 am.

"Nite" I said.

"I think I'm gonna go to bed to, Nite mom, nice to meet you Ray" Alec said.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me all the way to our attic bedroom. Once we got up there he just stared at me.

"Why would you try to leave me down there?" he said very irritated.

"I wasn't trying to leave you down there, I just wanted to leave, whatever happened to every man for himself?" I asked.

"You remember that the next time you need me" he said laughing.

"What a catch moms got down there isn't he" he said.

"Yeah, he is just sooo gorgeous" I said laughing.

I looked around our tiny room. There are two beds one with blue blankets, one with gets blue, I get green. The walls are wood and have nothing on them whatsoever. There are three stairs that lead to a window. That is my place. That is the place I spend most of my time. Looking at the sky. There is a dresser by Alec's bed and there is a dresser beside mine. There is a tiny closet which is where we change in the morning. There would be clothes in there if we had more. On the left side by Alecs bed is a little desk where we just pile stuff on it. There is a chair in the middle of our floor so that we can turn the light on. The switch broke so now we have to stand on the chair and turn the light bulb.

I walked up the three stairs and sat down on a pillow I had there. Alec followed and sat next to me.

"You know tomorrows New Years Eve right?" he asked.

"Don't remind me, its just the beginning of another terrible year" I said.

"Well I was thinking since we don't have school tomorrow that me and you could go downtown to see the fireworks." he said

"No, I don't want to, take your girlfriend'" I said as I opened the window.

"Don't be like that" he said looking straight at me.

"Why are you always so depressed?" he asked

"Because there is nothing to be happy about" I said getting louder with each word.

I looked away; I did not mean to yell at my brother.

"I'm sorry" I said quietly.

"Listen, I know this isn't the greatest, but things will get better" he said as he wrapped his arm around me.

I layed on his shoulder and looked at the stars.

"They are so pretty" I said quietly.

"What is pretty?" he asked.

"The stars, they are beautiful, they are just" I cut off.

He got up and walked down the stairs. He grabbed a blanket off his bed and walked back up. He sat at the same spot, covered me and him up, wrapped his arm around me, and sat in silence watching the stars. I layed my head on his shoulder and thought about how great he was. The most amazing person in my world. He takes care of me. He always has. We didn't always have to rely on each other though. When my mom had us, she dropped us off at grandmas. Our dad left when he found out my mom was pregnant. And so grandma took care of us. She was amazing. I wonder what she had done so bad to be given my mother for a child. My grandma was the most amazing parent in the world. 100x a better mom then my real mom are. My mom named me after her. Jane Elizabeth Cameron. But grandma was sick, and died when we were about 6. My mother swooped us away and we never even got to go to her funeral. Most people don't remember things from such a young age, but when that's the only good you had, you remember it as clear as day. My mom was gone most of the time, so me and Alec spent a lot of time together with sitters. Most of them were teenagers who had their boyfriends over and started to make out on our couch. But now, we just take care of ourselves. Mom has come home with so many guys now that she lost count. I lost count to. She brings them home, bangs them a couple of times, and then they move on. I guess she is hoping that she will find love. She had us when she was 15, and she is now 29. She said that we were the biggest mistake of her life. Well me, not Alec.

"Alec will be something some day, you, well I guess some whore house would love to have ya" she would say to me all the time. I was 8 when she first started to tell me that. I guess I'm a lost cause.

Alec and I drifted to sleep. I was asleep for about an hour before I started hearing moans.

"I guess Ray moves fast "I whispered to myself.

All you heard in this house was there moans. Alec started to move. He was barely awake when he said

"Are they doing it?"

I just started laughing. He opened his eyes and started laughing with me. HIs smile was wide and bright. He laugh is the most amazing thing to here. The way it rings and how happy it sounds. I wish my laugh sounded happy.

We both fell back asleep shortly after.

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