A/N- This is one-sided. Obviously. Because it's told purely from Dean's POV. Maybe I'll do a Cas one later. Idk.
I don't own Supernatural. Sadly.
One night, Dean had a dream.
It was about Cas.
Cas was falling, falling through the sky in a ball of flame, and as he was falling he fell through everything that had happened in the last four years, from pulling Dean out of Hell to getting left in Purgatory and everything in between. Dean saw everything that had passed between them, every harsh word he'd ever said to Cas and every time he'd let him down. Everything Cas felt and said and did in the space of a second, condensed into a bitter face of blue-eyed disappointment.
Dean was there with him for a while, falling too, and then they fell to Earth and Dean stayed but Cas kept falling, through the dirt and the sea and the rock. Dean was left by himself, with Cas's words echoing in his ears, telling him that it was all his fault, that all he did was break everything he touched and cause more problems than he solved, and now he had nothing left. And then there was fire everywhere and Dean couldn't move and he struggled but it was fruitless and then he tried to call for someone to help him, but there was no one there and he was alone.
He woke up with a sheen of sweat covering his face, his blankets tangled around his hips, telling himself it was just a dream, it was just a dream.
But the feeling that maybe it wasn't just a dream wouldn't go away.
He tossed and turned for a while, but he couldn't get back to sleep.
Then he heard footsteps go past his door. They weren't Sam's; Sam's were softer and blunter.
Which left only one person.
So Dean got up, and padded out of his room and into the kitchen, somewhere in the back of his mind registering how much he loved having a familiar route to walk.
Cas was there, standing at the sink, filling a glass with water. He turned when he heard Dean.
Dean kept walking, straight up to him, ignoring his 'Dean. What're you…?', and wrapped his arms around the ex-angel's shoulders.
Cas hesitated, and then returned the hug, pressing his face into Dean's shoulder and locking his arms around Dean's back.
Dean was apologising. He couldn't find the words, and even if he could have he wouldn't have been able to say them. So he was trying to put them into the way Cas's chest was crushed against his own and the way his chin dug into Cas's shoulder and the way his nose was just slightly turned into Cas's neck.
He was apologising for not trusting him, and not being there for him, and expecting him to do too much. For saying that nobody cared if he was broken, and for not helping put him back together again. He was apologising for all the times he'd spoken carelessly, and all the times he'd wanted Cas to do something for him without considering Cas himself, and all the times he'd called Cas to help with his own problems and then not returned the favour. Every time he'd forgotten every sacrifice Cas had ever made for him.
He was telling him about the dream, and what it made him realise. How it had made him see how important Cas was to him, how much he meant, how many times Dean had taken that for granted. He was telling him that they were still family, they always would be, telling him that he didn't know what he'd do if Cas didn't come back because then Dean would lose a friend and an ally and a brother.
He put everything into the hug, and hoped that Cas understood.
A/N2- Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed. :)