It wasn't tell she stopped screaming momentarily and looked at Louis' face when she realized how bad this really was. But she couldn't process that yet, she had to get Jake to hear her. She needed some hope…

… She couldn't stop running. The Red Door was so close but she couldn't get there. She had never run so much. She was so tired. She needed to keep going, she was going to do this herself. She was Olivia Pope. She could get to a freaking door…

… "I need a glass of water please." She knew her people were smart and tech savvy she had to hope that they would realize what she was planning to do. The only thing she really needed was to feel safe. She didn't have anything, or anyone. She looked at the men around her as she help the glass up as long as she could without it seeming out of place.

She made sure to glance up at Ian in case her team needed a little extra help. He couldn't go to war for her, her team needed to bring her home…

Olivia was suddenly thrown out of her nightmare and realized where she was. As she looked around Blair House she breathed a sigh of relief to see Fitz's tired eyes staring back at her. She could feel her heart beating out of her chest as she tried to focus on his words.

"Livvie? What's going on? What were you dreaming about?" His deep blue eyes showed his concern and confusion.

The blanket on top of her suddenly felt so restricting she could barely breathe. She jumped up surprising both her and Fitz. "No…no… I'm sorry." She and her stupid nightmare woke him up. They were doing so well. It wasn't ideal but it was great. She really didn't want to ruin it with her stuff. The back of her mind registered him quickly moving around and standing with her his concern evident. "I'm sorry you should go back to bed. I'm sorry. I'll be fine." She internally cursed herself for letting her tears fall.

"Please don't be sorry Olivia. You've done nothing wrong here. Please just talk to me. Tell me what you dreamt about." Fitz reached out to touch her but she flinched backwards quicker than he had ever seen her move before. "You're safe here. I promise. It's just you and me." He finally figured out where her head was. He saw her breathing quicken. "Just breathe with me." He slowly took in a few deep breaths.

She all but ignored his request in her panic. "I'm sorry. I thought I was better. I thought I was better. I tried to be better. " Olivia needed to see the whole room but she couldn't bear to go against the wall, she didn't know what to do so she paced.

Fitz sat down on the couch nearby hoping Olivia would eventually calm down enough to let him touch her and help her through whatever this was. "You don't need to be better right now. You need to be whatever you are- nothing more. I love you so much. You are safe here. You have so many people that love you. It's just me and you we'll do this together, whatever you need. You just need to talk to me. Tell me what you went through. Please." Fitz didn't know he could love a woman as much as he loved Olivia. Even when he thought he loved Mellie he didn't love her as much as he loved Olivia.

As Olivia kept pacing his words became clearer. "I'm sorry." She needed to say it one more time. She didn't want to ruin things as good as they had been. She loved finally having Fitz all to herself. "I thought I was better." She sat down on the other side of the couch.

"From your kidnapping you mean?" Fitz saw an opening and tried to take it.

"Yeah. At first I wasn't good. I pretended I was but I wasn't. Then I thought I got better. I hadn't had a nightmare in a while." She looked incredibly uncomfortable opening up, but she was so Fitz took it as a good sign. He saw her breathing slow down. "For what it's worth I'm happy you're here. It's just hard to talk about it." Olivia started to cry again.

Fitz reached out to hold her hand and breathed an internal sigh of relief when she didn't flinch. "Oh Liv I can only imagine how hard it is to talk about it and don't let me or anyone else pressure you to you need to go at your own pace." Olivia scooted closer to him but still not touching besides their hands. "I'm happy that I'm here to. I've never been happier to be with someone. I'll stay here, or wherever you are, for as long as you'll have me. I want to be here, to help you."

"I love you so much Fitz." Olivia scooted into Fitz's arms which he quickly molded to hold her.

"I love you too Livvie." Fitz had to fight his own tears as he held her as close as he could on the couch.

"I saw all of it. My neighbor, the door, the proof of life video." It took him a second to realize she was answering his earlier question. "I had to read off of these horribly written cue cards and they were all just staring." Fitz had never felt less powerful as she began to shake in his arms, he just held tighter. She decided to start with the video. "I asked for a glass of water. I asked because I knew if I held the glass up long enough Huck might be able to get the guy who had me through facial recognition. Fitz I've…" Her tears choked her up as she tried to keep going.

"You're safe here Liv. I've got you and that's how it's going to stay. You are safe now." He wished he knew what to say. Fitz tried to stop his tears but he couldn't, he had never seen Olivia in so much pain.

"I've never been so scared Fitz. After everything I've done I've never been so scared." Olivia tried to hold back and tensed up her jaw. She really didn't want to ruin what they had going.

Fitz felt her tense. "I'm not going anywhere Liv. I promise. I love all of you. You are safe here. No matter what I'm going to be here. You can let go with me." He wondered if she had let her feeling all the way out since she had returned.

She took a deep but shaky breath in. "They told me even after you declared war that they were just going to kill me after you left office. I felt doomed." Then she finally let herself fall apart. She pushed the thoughts of ruining her new relationship to the back of her mind because she knew Fitz was going to stay with her.

He pulled her in tighter then he thought he could. He whispered any words that came to mind trying to sooth her and allow her to have her feelings. He held her and let her cry for what felt like hours until he finally felt her breath even out and she fell asleep. Once he was positive she had he quickly followed.

XxXxXxXxX

When Olivia woke up the first thing she saw were Fitz's eyes, staring at her. "Hi." She decided on their line.

"Hi." He smiled down at her as she sat up from off of his lap.

"Sorry you couldn't get up." Olivia stretched and smiled at him, thinking about how lucky she was.

"I was happy and comfortable." He smiled and stretched himself.

"Sorry about this morning." Olivia suddenly broke eye contact as the events of the night came back to her.

"Hey. Look at me." Fitz guided her chin so she met his eyes again. "I love you so much and nothing could change that. No apology necessary."