A/N: This was written for a TWoP challenge and is entirely tongue-in-cheek. While there is absolutely no sex involved it is rated R for nudity. As always I own nothing, any resemblance to real people is all in my head, and you could fit everything I know about writing and producing a television show on the top of a very small pin.
Naked!Ryan
"Hey Ryan, wait up." Josh jogged a bit to catch up with the young actor. "Look, I've spent some of our down time reading the posts at Television Without Pity and the people there really want to see some Naked!Ryan. How would you feel about showing a little extra flesh?"
"Not another make out scene with Marissa?" Ben complained. "Josh, I just don't think I can stomach that this early in the season."
"No, not Marissa. I've decided to take their advice and send her to rehab until after Chrismukkah. With a little luck Mischa will spend that time eating and taking acting lessons."
"Yay, TWoP! I guess Naked!Ryan is the least I can do in return. How do you want to set it up?"
"My thought was that Ryan comes back in the middle of the night and takes a shower to wash off the stench of Chino. He slips into bed not realizing that in his absence Hailey has reclaimed the pool house." Josh began explaining the scene he had meticulously written the night before. "There has been some concern at TWoP that Amanda is not totally female, so I thought I'd kill two birds with one stone and have her dressed in a tight camisole and panties."
"Sounds great" Ben replied.
Ben stood still as Angelia, Mischa's old make-up girl, patted his rear with a large pink powder puff. When she had finished he wrapped a soft cotton towel around his waist.
Naked!Ryan Scene 1
Ryan drops his towel briefly exposing his backside before climbing under the covers, not realizing that Hailey has already claimed his bed for the night.
"Ya know, Josh, it's not just Ryan the TWoP posters want to see naked." Adam pointed out to his friend and boss. "There was a tremendous amount of internet squeeing at the sight of my pelvic bones."
"Adam, don't be jealous. It's not Ben's fault that Ryan has 304 pages to his thread and Seth only has 41. Besides, why would Seth be naked in Ryan's bed?"
"Didn't you read the fan fiction threads? Seth/Ryan slash is hot."
"The hoyay on The OC is implied, not explicit." Josh stated firmly. "There is no way the censors will allow the two main male characters to hook up."
"OK, so how about Summer spends the night and they decide that it would be easier to sneak her past Sandy and Kirsten if they played in the pool house instead of Seth's room?" Adam asked. "We could have Rachel dressed in one of her Victoria's Secret panty sets. That always goes over well."
"Works for me. Just give me a half hour to write the scene and we'll be set." Josh opened his laptop and began tapping the keys.
Ben stood still as once again Angelia softly beat her pink powder puff against his naked rear. He wrapped himself in the towel and walked toward the bed.
Naked!Ryan Scene 2
The towel slowly slides over Ryan's muscular butt, falling to the floor as he climbs beneath the covers of his bed, not realizing that Seth and Summer were already there, tangled together and sleeping peacefully under the silk sheets.
"Josh, it's not fair that only the kids get to show some skin. I have fans who think I'm hot." Melinda whined in a faintly sexy way.
"You, yes. Caleb, no. Sorry, but nobody wants to see Alan Dale naked." Josh wasn't about to give in on that issue.
"Ok, how about bringing Chris back for this episode?" Melinda asked. "Luke could be visiting his mother when we hook up again. Knowing that the pool house is empty, we decide that it's safer to rendezvous there than at my house or his."
Josh sighed and agreed to write the scene.
Ben paced and complained about the additional shoot, but stood still when Angelia glared at him. He graciously allowed her to gently brush her pink powder puff against his naked rear and back and spritz warm water on his shoulders. He picked up a clean towel and quickly covered himself then stalked to the bed.
Naked!Ryan Scene 3
As isolated drops of water wind their way down Ryan's tanned and muscular back, he allows the towel to slowly slide to the floor, exposing his tight buttocks before climbing gracefully under the covers, unaware that Julie and Luke have chosen his bed as the safest place to resume their clandestine affair.
"Josh, I know I'm not in the same shape as Mindy or the kids, but really, the TWoP threads are clear that they expect more Sandy and Kirsten love scenes this year. They've even nicknamed us Kandy." Peter's voice was deep and intense as he tried to reason with the young producer.
"I know that, but I can't think of a good reason to have Sandy and Kirsten naked in Ryan's bed. It's just, well, ew." Josh was beginning to tire of the demands of his actors. "I'll write some extra scenes for you and Kelly for a later episode."
"Actually, I've been thinking about it and I figured in Ryan's absent Kirsten will have excess energy and has undertaken a major remodel of the master bedroom. That gives us a legitimate excuse to sleep in the pool house without squicking out our viewers." Peter was sure his idea would work.
Josh silently opened his laptop and began to write the scene as the actor looked over his shoulder, offering suggestions and encouragement.
Ben stared open-mouthed as Josh explained the upcoming scene. He sighed heavily, shook his head and then stood still while Angelia cheerfully used her pink powder puff to buff his nude torso, slyly giving his butt an extra stroke or two and then used her squirt bottle to lightly mist his shoulders. He then found the pile of clean towels and grabbed one to wrap around his waist.
Naked!Ryan Scene 4
Ryan walks over to the bed, his golden chest glistening in the moonlight. He turns and isolated drops of water wind their way down his tanned and muscular back. Slowly the towel slides over his tight, well-shaped buttocks, dropping to floor as he stretches sinuously before climbing into bed. He quickly jumps out, grabbing the towel as he stares in shock at the sleeping forms of his foster parents.
"Hi, Josh, how's the porn business?" Samaire winked and hugged her former boss.
"What are you doing here?" Josh asked, staring confusedly at the younger woman.
"Ben called and said he was doing multiple nude scenes and thought I might be interested in filming one with him." Samaire explained.
"Ben?" Josh turned to question the actor.
"C'mon, Josh, I've had four nude scenes and haven't gotten to kiss anyone." Ben ducked his head and glanced sideways at Josh, giving him his best Scared!Ryan look. "I've written the scene for you so you don't have to do any extra work. See, with Marissa gone, Ryan will need someone to hook up with. So, Anna misses her parents or Summer or something, and comes back. Ryan meets her his first night home and without Seth or Marissa to muck up the works they realize they're attracted to each other and head back to the pool house."
"I guess it'll work. Hell, what's one more scene? Although I have no idea how I'm going to tie all these together into one episode." Josh complained.
"How about a dream sequence? Each of the characters could dream about Ryan's first night back in the pool house." Ben had an answer for everything.
Angelia gave up any pretense of disinterest as she rubbed stage make-up onto Ben's butt and then used her pink powder puff to even out the colors, smiling at the pretty form before her. She even spiked her water bottle with a drop or two of her favorite cologne before lightly coating his shoulders. Ben grinned at her and then grabbed a towel, securing it around his waist before walking toward the bed.
Naked!Ryan Scene 5
Ryan emerges from the shower and strides purposely to the bed. His golden chest glistens in the moonlight and shadows form on his well-defined abs. A soft trail of honey colored hair disappears beneath the thick towel he has wrapped loosely around his hips. He turns and stretches sinuously as isolated drops of water wind their way past his muscular shoulders and down his perfectly tanned back. Slowly the towel slides over his tight, shapely buttocks, pooling on the floor as he climbs gracefully under the covers. Then, pulling Anna close he loses himself in her welcoming embrace.
Josh smiled as he left the sound stage for the night, visions of happy Ryan Thread posters and the promised Tollhouse cookies, kosher dinners, and a special spun chocolate replica of the Big House danced in his head.