First off: Spazz Kadet is watching me as I upload this, trying not to laugh (and watching my epic fail at typing oh man I blame the Faygo).

Second: MERRY CHRISTMAS! :D

I kinda rushed this, so I'm sorry if it's... shitty? Anyway. Have some fluff- that's my Christmas gift to you, my dear readers!

(but rae what about 25 days of christmasstuck)

Shoooosh, voice in my head. Shooosh -pap-

Enjoy :D

Disclaimer: Nope. Andrew Hussie owns this. I hope he has a Merry Christmas... AND I HOPE HE ENJOYS ALL THE PAIN HE PUTS US THROUGH -slaps self-

Secret Santa

My eyes couldn't leave the slip of paper in my hand, like it was one of those strange malformations that you couldn't look away from- no matter what you did, your attention was always drawn back to it, staring, gaping, unconvinced that, yes, it was a real thing that happened, and it was allowed to happen by whatever deity existed. My mouth fell open in a silent gesture to my disbelief in the situation, and I was almost one-hundred percent sure my confusion, shock and embarrassment were written all over my face for the entire table to see. And, written upon the slip of paper I held was a name, a name that became synonymous to every feeling I've seen portrayed in Karkat's stupid romcoms and more, and I felt my world falling apart before my very blue eyes and buck teeth.

'Dave Strider'.

Maybe I as well ought to have died right then and there. I lifted my eyes carefully to the other side of the table, where my cool-kid best friend was staring down at his paper, and any emotions he would have felt about it where otherwise unreadable because of that grade-A poker face he always wore, and his shades. Dave Strider tilted his head up, presumably looking at me, and sent a smirk in my direction, which I responded to with the deepest blush of my life. "You look a bit flushed, Egbert. You sick?"

I laughed nervously, waving my hands in front of me comically, and shaking my head. "N-No! Just a bit warm in this jacket, that's all, haha!" I coughed up a shitty excuse, watching his smirk grow a bit as he folded up his paper and stuck it into his pocket.

"Whatever you say."

My cousin- Jade Harley- stood at the end of the lunch table, smiling wide as we all read over our papers, some of us ecstatic with our results (Kanaya seemed quite pleased, as well as Gamzee), others not so much (me being the prime example, but I could see Tavros shrink away from his paper). "Well, not that you all have drawn names, I would like to give a bit of a foundation for the rules!" She cleared her throat, feminine voice still childish and graceful, even full of enthusiasm. Her green eyes sparkled happily as she began to speak again. "Okay, so you're required to buy or make one present for the person you drew, and include a hint with it to lead the person into figuring out! If they don't get it by Christmas when we all meet up at my house for dinner, then you're allowed to tell them! However, you can't tell anyone who you drew, no matter what." She gave another sweet smile. "I hope you guys are able to find a present for your people! I wish you all good luck!"

Just then the bell rang, and we all disbanded, ready to head off to our different classes, and I stuffed the paper in my pocket, standing and waiting at the end of the table with Jade for Dave. "I can't believe you actually went through with this," I told her, leaning against the tabletop, watching her behind my glasses. "I know you wanted to do something like this last year, but I didn't actually think you'd get anyone in on it."

She giggled. "Of course I would, John! Kanaya and Rose where thrilled at the idea, and even Sollux thought it would be fun to try!" She gave me a thoughtful smile before walking up, right as Dave put a hand on my shoulder.

"Hey, you're off this period, right?" he asked, coming around to stand next to me as we walked out of the lunch room, heading toward our dorm. He stuffed his hands into his hoodie's pockets, and I knew he was watching me from behind his shades. I swallowed the anticipation in my gut.

"Yeah, I would have math, but I've already taken the final, so I don't have to go back." I told him, adjusting my backpack on my back, watching my feet as they hit the tile, then the stone walkways outside. My breath hovered in front of me for a moment before fading away.

He chuckled. "Awesome. We should play some video games or something. I'm not going to rush the secret Santa thing. I'd have my recipient falling all over me like 'oh Mister Strider, oh' in no time anyway." Something inside my chest started hurting. "What about you? How well do you think you'll woo the person you drew?"

I smiled, unsurely and sullenly, before shrugging. "Probably not real well, to be honest. I think I'll just end up being a complete and total idiot, like I always am. I doubt they'd even return the feelings." He gave me a weird look before I cleared my throat. "So, I vote we play Left 4 Dead 2."

"As long as I get to be Nick, haha."

"Of course, hehe!"

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Are you stairs?

Because I'm falling for you.

I looked down at the poem, eyes wandering over the wrapped box that came with it, and back to the typed up note, blinking a little and even more so gaping. 'falling for you'? My secret Santa liked me? I swallowed down the embarrassment stuck in my throat and then dared a glance up to Dave, who was studying over the note on the present I got him, holding the movie (Mission Impossible) in one and the paper in the other. I tried to contain my blush, knowing he was reading my confession and I was standing not two feet from him, and I looked down, back at my present before sighing.

How could this be?

I opened the box and stared down in it. A new, collector's edition of Con-Air sat inside, with another small note on top. 'heard you like this movie, so here- have the collector's edition. it's worth the money to see the smile on your face'. My face went bright red, and I felt my heart speed up. Someone got me this? For a secret Santa exchange? I gaped at the DVD for a few moments before a hand clasped down on my shoulder and I jumped. "Con-Air? Collector's edition? I didn't even they made a collector's edition for that shit."

I turned to look into Dave's shades, face turning red all over again. "Con-Air isn't shit! It's the best movie and you're just jealous you can't look like Nic Cage!" I snapped, giving him a look from behind my glasses before giggling insanely. "So what did you get?"

"Mission Impossible, and this letter. My secret Santa likes me, if I'm not reading this wrong."

'You're not.'

"That's cool! Mine too, hehe."

Dave took the letter out of my hands, and the note that was on the wrapping paper and read over them. "Shit 'are you stairs because I'm falling for you'? This person is a total sap," he shook his head, watching me behind his shades. "Whoever drew your name is a hopeless romantic. Any idea who it might be?"

I looked at the note, shaking my head, and then looking up at Dave's shades, seeing something in his face I've never seen before, but shrugging it off. "Nope… No idea."

I straightened my blue sweater and raised my hand to knock at the door, worrying my lower lip between my buck teeth before the door to Jade's apartment swung open and she giggled happily. "John!" she lunged at me and threw her arms around me, like it had been years since she had last seen me, when in reality it had only been a couple of weeks. She pulled back and smiled wide, pulling me into the warm apartment. "C'mon! We're only missing Sollux and Karkat, but I think they'll be here soon," she told me, cheerily skipping over to her tree and picking up a gift bag, then turning and holding it out to me. "Here! I got you a present!"

"Oh, gosh, Jade you shouldn't have…" I told her, smiling and pulling out the tissue paper to reveal a DVD copy of "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes". That was shitty, even by my standards. I looked up at her and giggled. "Now I feel like a bad cousin because I didn't get you anything…"

She shook her head, braids running down to her lower back and over her festive red and green oversized sweater with her black leggings underneath. She smiled and gave me a little wave. "It's no big deal, and I have to get back to the kitchen to finish cooking. I'll talk to you in a bit!" Jade skipped off and I shifted my eyes to the others, who were chatting happily amongst each other- Rose and Kanaya were cuddled up together on the couch, Gamzee and Tavros sitting next to the tree, looking at a book I assumed Tavros had gotten, Equius, Aradia and Nepeta laughing at some joke Terezi told them, then I caught sight of Dave, who was leaning up against the kitchen counter, sipping at a glass of apple cider and watching the ignored TV like he actually cared. My brain exploded.

What if he figured it out?

I tentatively walked over to him, smiling my usual smile, and getting a smirk in return. "Hey, Egbert. Took you long enough to show up." I punched him lightly in the arm, looking down at my gift. "What did she get you?"

"Oh, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes. And I'd actually agree the movie is total shit. Haha," I chuckled a bit, and then looked at his gift bag, all the tissue paper still on top. "What did you get? Did you even open it?"

He chuckled under his breath. "She got me condoms, and then said something like 'you're going to need them'." My heart started racing. "Yeah, okay Harley. Funny joke."

I laughed with his smug snort, looking down at the floor rather than him now. Two weeks and I hadn't even been able to somewhat decode my secret Santa, and Dave hadn't hinted that he had, either. We were at a stand-still, but I could never tell with Dave- what if he knew it was me and was just waiting for the right time to reject me? I was his best friend so I figured he wouldn't hurt me, but he was such a womanizer, I knew he'd never like me back. And if he did, then I surely had chased him away with the 'I am not a homosexual' rant I went on our senior year. I sighed, mentally, and then cast my eyes back up only to find Jade's, and I blinked. "Um. Hi?"

"Did you figure out your secret Santa?" she asked, and I looked next to me. Dave was as straight-faced as always, and not even looking to us.

"Uh, no…" I told her, turning a bit red at the thought, and seeing her chuckle.

"Good! No one else did, either. Hehe. As soon as Karkat and Sollux get here, I thin-"

The door flew open and Karkat walked in, soaked from the snow and glaring miserably at Sollux behind him. "We're fucking here, finally."

"Well they're here! Yay!" She clapped her hands together. "Now that they're here, we can wrap up our secret Santa!" My cousin smiled, turning to me, green eyes bright and wide, and I felt my stomach bottom out. I suddenly had a feeling she knew exactly who mine was. "I want you to go up to the person you drew and tell them! But I don't want any fighting, okay!"

She skipped off merrily, making a bee-line right for Kanaya. Everyone began going up to the others (Tavros' tortured look finally understood- he had drawn Vriska), and I looked up to Dave. He hadn't moved an inch. "Well, who did you draw, Dave?" I asked, putting a smile on my face, even though there were butterflies in my stomach, erupting even more when our arms just barely brushed together. My face was heating up, and I felt the shake in my hands.

'He's going to hate you. He's going to abandon you. He won't talk to you. He doesn't like you. What were you thinking? He's cool.'

"You tell me first," he said, simply, and I froze up, eyes wide. He looked at me from out of the corner of his eye. "Well?"

I blinked, completely caught off guard and stunned to feel the burn of tears behind my eyes. "I drew…" I shifted my eyes to the carpet under my feet, rather than looking at his shades because I felt the rejection burn my heart. The words echoed in my head. "I drew you." My world crashed in around me, and all I could hear was my heart thudding loudly in my chest and my own ragged breathing before I stood up straight and stalked off to the bathroom, only able to hear Jade's concerned "John?" before I was in the back hallway, the cheery voices a bit duller once I reached Jade's guest bedroom. I sat down on the edge of the bed and ran my hands through my hair, my emotions a train wreck and messy. He knows. He knows. He knew it was me, that lame confession letter I wrote, the stupid movie I heard him talking about liking, the shitty emotions I had to put into that stupid gift. I could have just left it well enough alone, but I had to make this into what it was- I had to get my emotions involved. And now, I was down a best friend. He hated me. I know he would.

"Egbert."

Never before had my head whipped up so fast, my eyes landing on his shadow cast in the doorway, shoulder resting carefully against the doorframe and shades glinting in the low light filtering through the shades from the street lights. My mouth fell open and I used my sleeve to wipe away my tears. "O-Oh... uh, hi…."

"Hi to you, too, derp," he said, but his voice didn't sound like it was full of hate or icy or pity or anything. It sounded almost… concerned? He took a few steps forward, sitting on the edge of the bed next to me, hand dangerously close to the one I had rested next to my hip. "So you drew my name? You were the one who wrote the letter and gave me Mission Impossible?"

I answered with a nod.

"You never let me tell you who I drew," he told me, leaning a little closer, teasing my emotions with his stupid suave moves that I know I'd never be able to witness personally. His breath ghosted over my skin as his mouth rested near my ear, and my entire body was on fire. I closed my eyes from fear. "I drew your name."

My eyes snapped open. Oh my god. He drew… my name?

'Roses are red, violets are blue. Are you stairs? Because I'm falling for you."

I was an idiot! I knew the reference in the poem- Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, his comic he had been working on since he was thirteen. My heart started thudding even more when I remembered the note with Con-Air, and I swore I almost fainted from all the happiness. 'its worth the money to see the smile on your face'. I braved looking up, my eyes meeting his, shades gone and I gaped at the red irises in front of me. "So. You… like me?" I asked, carefully, suddenly feeling thirteen again with a crush, not at all like a college student.

"Yeah. You're the only one I'd ever get something as shitty as a collector's edition of Con-Air for. You like me?" he turned it back to me, and I felt my face heat up.

"Hah… yeah… I don't even know how long I have, but… I do." I told him, giving him an unsure smile, not sure where the waters ended for being tested, but I suppose he could deal with the fact his hand rested on top of mine. "I knew you liked the movie, so when I saw it at the video store I had to get it for you."

He chuckled, leaning forward and kissing my forehead gently, sparks shooting all down my body. "You had me completely fooled, John. I hope you feel proud- you fooled a Strider."

I laughed, resting our foreheads together and smiling, eyes closed. "I'll never let you live it down, hehe."

"Well, fuck."

That sent me into a fit of uncontrollable giggles before Dave grabbed my hand and pulled me up, sending me an look that wasn't shaded by his sunglasses, and a genuine smile that made me melt. I giggled a little more, absolutely sure I was thirteen again before he chuckled sinisterly. "Hey, John, look up."

I blinked, raising my eyes to look at the doorframe, almost scared to find a branch of mistletoe hanging above us, and I gaped. What in the hell Jade? I cast a look back to Dave, smiling nervously. "Why don't we pretend that doesn't exist? Haha…" I was too chicken to tell him I had actually never been kissed, and the butterflies in my stomach were freaking out again.

"Hmm," he sounded contemplative for a moment, humming low before wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me toward him, probably savoring the little gasp I gave. "Nope." And then without any warning or sign, he leaned down and kissed me, his lips pressed against mine softly, and I felt my eyes widen before I slipped them closed, putting my hands on his shoulders and trying to keep my heart steady. My first kiss was with my best friend and one love, Dave Strider. Best Christmas present ever.

We parted and I smiled at him, feeling the warmth in my stomach and my cheeks, and he returned the smile. "Merry Christmas, Dave."

"Merry Christmas, John."

So maybe the secret Santa didn't backfire.