Disclaimer: I don't own anything I claim to! –cries and sniffles in a corner- IT'S ALL A LIE!!!
A/N: Alright, I was in the bath, washing up with my favorite body wash, this peppermint thing and then I remembered that a scent is a major turn on for some guys and then I somehow thought of pick up lines. Don't ask me how it got to that, I don't know in the least. Alright, this is in script for BUT FOR A VERY GOOD REASON! It's also OOC. Sorry, but it's my fic, I get to do what I want with it. THIS IS A ONE SHOT FOR THE MALE CHARACTERS ONLY! Enjoy!
Dragon's-Maidens: (holding a microphone) Hello and welcome to "The Pick Up Lines" with the popular anime Yu-Gi-OH! Today we have all of the male characters that have played a major part in the show. Meet today's characters: he's a rich and famous retired card player, the maker of the game Duel Monsters, Maxamillion Pegasus!
(audience claps and cheers)
Pegasus: Merci, DM and might I say, that outfit is stunning.
DM: Um…thanks, it's just some blue jeans and a blue t-shirt.
Pegasus: Marvelous.
DM: (sweatdrops and coughs) The torturing yami with a wicked attitude and a very sharp knife, Marik Ishtar.
(can we get on with this?)
Marik: I RULE YOU ALL! (fangirls all go hiserical)
DM: He's the former Thief King, the one who summoned and worked for Zorc, give it up for Bakura!
(fangirls go wild and Bakura smirks)
Bakura: I could get used to this.
DM: I'm sure. You know him as Atem, the once proud and mighty ruler of Egypt, here he is, the alter ego of Yugi, Yami.
(more fangirls cry out and cheer)
Yami: (raises a hand for silence) Please, you're too kind.
DM: Ego will go straight to the head, Yami. (turns back to the audience) He's a street punk with a wild side, the blonde hottie of Yu-Gi-Oh, Joey Wheeler!
(fangirls screaming out "WE LOVE YOU JOEY!")
Joey: Alright, finally, my name in the spotlight.
Seto: Too bad it's short lived.
Joey: Why I ought ta-
DM: Joey! (frowns at Joey and then turns back) Well, the man who needs no introduction but pays handsomely for it anyways, Seto Kaiba!
(you get the point with the fangirls)
Seto: (closes his eyes and crosses his arms) This had better be worth it, DM, or you're fired.
DM: Yes sir, NOT! (fangirls boo) From the smallest of the group to the hero in only the whole season, the King of Games, Yugi Mouto!
(need I say more?)
Yugi: (blushes) Is all this neccisary?
DM: No, it's fun. The British accent, white haired little hikari we all know and adore, Ryou Bakura!
(-sighs- more fangirls)
Ryou: (gives a small waves and is very red in the face)
DM: From San Fransisco, the maker of Dungeon Dice Monsters, ruler of the dice, Duke Devlon!
(fangirls, again)
Duke: Ladies, ladies, you'll all get a chance with me.
DM: He was tortured at birth by his father, locked away in a cold, dark hole, Malik Ishtar!
(this is getting old fast)
Malik: Thank you, thank you!
DM: With a stylish haircut and a motorcycle to match, the best friend of Joey and rival to Duke, Tristan Taylor!
(once again, fangirls)
Tristan: (blushes and rubs the back of his head) Thanks.
DM: (counts and stops then recounts again) Oh yeah. Growing up with the famous CEO for a brother is hard but this young boy managed to pull it off well, Mokuba Kaiba!
(fangirls go all into motherly/sisterly cuteness mode)
Mokuba: (waves and laughs)
Seto: What's he doing here?
DM: (looks at a slip of paper) He had signed up, along with you a minute later.
Yugi: It's alright, Mokuba just wanted to have fun.
DM: Yeah. Now all contestants must give two pick up lines.
Joey: What? You're joking, right?
DM: Nope. You will each go in order. Pegasus, you're first with the cheesiest pick up line.
Pegasus: Face it, honey, I drive you wild with the one eye look.
Joey: I think I'm going to barf.
DM: (sweatdrops) That was cheesy. Marik, you're up.
Marik: I'll send every man to the Shadow Realm just so I could get with you.
Bakura: You CHEAT! That was my line!
DM: Now now, Bakura, it was a nice line but he got to it first. Now it's your turn.
Bakura: I rule you like I rule the world.
Yami: You don't rule the world! I do!
Seto: You rule a land of sand. I rule the world with money!
Pegasus: Please, you inherited that.
Seto: And you didn't?
DM: Boys, please. (sighs) Yami, it's your turn.
Yami: I'm king, baby, you have to love me.
DM: (cracks up laughing) That was cheesy.
Joey: My turn, right?
Seto: Shut up, mutt.
Joey: Watch it, rich boy or I'll-
DM: JOEY! It's your turn!
Joey: Fine. (smirks) You look familiar. Have I seen you before? Oh yeah, you're my next girlfriend.
DM: Jeez. Seto Kaiba, you're turn is next.
Seto: DM, I can't believe I'm doing this.
DM: Just do it and I'll leave you alone.
Seto: Promise?
DM: Oh Seto, promise is such a hard word…
Seto: Whatever. (sighs) Do you have a map? I got lost in your eyes…
DM: I said cheesy, not an actual…(ish too red to say anything and waves Yugi on for next)
Yugi: If I bit my lip, would you kiss it better?
(fangirls go nuts)
DM: (slaps her forehead) I give up.
Ryou: (is red from what Bakura suggested) –AHEM- You'll be the iceburg and I'll be the Titanic. I'll go down on you…
DM: RYOU!
(several fangirls have nose bleeds)
Ryou: Bakura said to say it!
DM: (ish REALLY red now) Duke…
Duke: If I said you had a nice body, would you turn it against me?
Malik: I'm like a rubix cube. The more you play with me, the harder I'll get.
(fangirls go nuts and faint)
Tristan: I can't believe you used that line.
Duke: You got something better?
Tristan: Yes, in fact I do! If I toss this penny, what's the change of me getting head?
DM: TRISTAN! There is a KID in the show too!
Seto: (glares at all who make sexual innuendo jokes around his brother)
DM: Mokuba, it's your turn.
Mokuba: (BIG puppy dog eyes) I'll let you beat me at video games if I could get a date…
DM: Watch it kid, that might work one day.
Mokuba: Really?
DM: Really really.
Mokuba: Awesome.
DM: Now, ladies and…ladies, we bring you ACTUAL pick up lines that will work.
Pegasus: Out of all the painting I've worked on, you are far more beautiful.
Marik: I could kill every person in the world but you are the only one I would never hurt.
Bakura: You stole my line again! –ahem- I could rule the world but only with you by my side.
Yami: I'm a king but I've searched my whole kingdom to find the most suitable queen, and you my dear, are just the one.
Joey: Hey baby, I may be a duelist but I could never be beaten at winning your heart.
Seto: I am CEO, president and rich, but nothing would make me happier than I am with you.
Yugi: Well, this is embarrassing but I guess I could give it a try. (blushes and rubs the back of his head) Wanna go out on a date?
Ryou: I'll never let you get hurt and I'll never make you cry.
Duke: I may be famous and a flirt but you'd be my one and only.
Malik: I could help you with any history homework you might have…
Tristan: My motorcycle is for you to use as well as my heart.
Mokuba: (BIG puppy dog eyes again) You'd be my first girlfriend.
DM: Wow, you guys go from REALLY cheesy to extremely sweet. Guess we fangirls have a hard time cooping with it, right girls? (turns back to see them all faints with nosebleeds) –AHEM- Well, Pick Up lines were brought to you by: Lemon Club, hot sexy scenes for the romantics (ADULTS ONLY), Crack Fics, the so corny and random fics in the world and by Dragon's-Maidens, that's me, the girl who showed all of this. Now say bye boys.
All characters: BYE BOYS!
DM: (sweatdrops) Never mind.
A/N: Alright so it wasn't as good as it was in my head but it's okay. PLEASE POST A REVIEW!