Title: HOW THE STORY ENDS….
Pairings: none

*I have used quotes from both the show and some of my fav writers, who include JK Rowling, Jodi Picoult and Jim Butcher*

Please review, this story didn't really go in the direction that I planned and I don't even know if it makes sense or if it is any good so cookies for anyone who reviews! Please enjoy!

SAM'S POINT OF VIEW

"I have never been more sorry in my life, Dean, you have to believe me" I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs. How could he not know how much I regret drinking the demon blood? How can I possibly prove that to him? he looks away, his back is facing me, is he walking away? Is he leaving me?

"then why do it?", his voice is a whisper, cracking in pain. I can hear the tears, I can hear the vulnerability. I can hear the despair, the betrayal, the hurt…

"I had my reasons at the time, I thought I was protecting you, I was becoming stronger, I could save you, and I could protect you, instead of the other way round. I would take this all back in a heartbeat if it would make it any better, but I can't. I was hurt, I was angry, I don't know, but my feelings didn't matter when I realised that I had hurt you."

"so that's ok than, as long as you feel better! You should have left me in hell. It's what I deserved" I can tell by his eyes that he truly believes that. And it scares the shit out me. I thought things would be better now that he's back, that things would go back to the way that they use to be, but I still feel so lost, so alone. That's the worst type of pain I think, of feeling alone among family and friends. The pain of being a stranger to the people that I see every day, the pain of putting on a show that the world so easily believes. The pain of not being able to look into the mirror because you can't face yourself, you can't face your past. Your scared to look at those hollow eyes that will stare back out at you, and finding that pain that it is always going to be this way. I will never be able to change this. I will never be able to go back.

"You jerk, don't you understand at all, I can't do this without you, your my brother, ever since I was little I looked up to you, I wanted to be just like you, you were gone for months Dean, months. I didn't know what to do. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, but there's nothing I can do to take it back, but I'll prove it to you, I promise, please." Now it is my voice that begins to break, he doesn't understand, and I don't know if he ever will.

He looks at me, his eyes cold, I can almost physically feel my heart sink.
"Sammy," he shakes his head, taking a deep breath he continues, "you are so much better off without me. you never needed me, you were doing just fine, you were at college you had a girl you had a life, and I took that away from you. But for you to destroy yourself like this. To betray your only brother, the only family you have left, you say you did it to make yourself stronger, well how is that going for you…" he sighs again rubbing his hands over his face and for the first time he looks old, he looks tired. Tiny cracks are beginning to appear in his amour. Cas speaks up from the shadows,
"why do you think you shouldn't be saved, Dean?"

I look between Cas and Dean, I can see the bond, the connection, and I feel… I feel jealous. Great I'm jealous of an angel this couldn't get any worse…

"look at what I've done Cas, it's easier just to hide it away, pretend like nothing has happened man, have some pie with a couple of beers, chuck on a porno and just ignore that voice in the back of my head, reminding me, taunting me, so I eat more pie, drink a little more, but you know your screwed when pie doesn't help…" Cas smirks and the anger in me rises up again… I reach for the gun tucked safely away, hidden out of sight, I pull it out quickly and aim straight at Castile's heart. They both see the gun at the same time. Their reaction slow and clumsy if this wasn't so serious I would laugh my arse off at them.

"Sam, man" Dean struggles to get the words out, Cas is giving me a weird look. One that I just can't read but I'm so angry that I don't care. "why are you doing this Sammy?" the fact that Dean has to even ask makes my blood boil, it makes my heart beat faster… what the hell is going on here. Normally it's the other way round, Dean is the hot head and I'm the one thinking it through and now I just pulled a gun on an angel. What the hell.

Cas looks at Dean then to me and back to Dean, "Don't blame him Dean, his hurt, his scared, his angry and you can't really blame him," he turns and faces me, I can feel his chest hit the tip of the gun, but I know his not afraid that I'm going to shot. Hell it's only rock salts anyway. Not even enough to kill a human let alone him… "Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it. And now you are feeling it, I understand Sam, but fight the demons, don't let it get the better of you. You're stronger than this. Fight it" I can do nothing more than growl at him, God I want to shot him, for taking Dean away from me, for everything.

"you don't know what you're talking about" and with that I get ready to pull the trigger when out of nowhere I hears Deans voice. "ENOUGH! enough…"

DEANS POINT OF VIEW

He held the gun towards Cas. "ENOUGH!" I say "enough." He looks at me eyes wide so curious they might be fearful. I slowly stumble over. I can feel blood on my face. My breathe is in short gasps I am now standing in front of him and he doesn't know what to do. The gun is still pointed at Cas, I raise my hand placing two fingers on the cool metal and I pull it around placing the tip on my chest, right over my heart.

"it's time to end this once and for all"

His eyes widen, his mouth opens and shuts like a fish gasping for air. Breathe I will him, just breathe. " w why ?" his face is so confused o my darling brother you just don't understand do you? The demon blood has destroyed the heart that once served to protect. The heart that now seeks to destroy. If by killing me ends this nightmare for him then so be it. Maybe in death I can finally be the brother he deserved the brother that could finally save him from himself! But he is hesitating his fighting the demons with in

"you are many things Sammy but a cold blooded murderer is not one of them " he looks at me like I'm speaking another language. This kid us so lost and it is all my fault. I should have killed ruby when I had the chance. I should have saved him. Hell you don't need water to drown I know that better than anybody. But here we are ...

How could I let it get this bad, how could I fail him like this. He was so desperate that he had to turn to a demon, a demon, for help. He has never been one to admit that he is in pain, physical or not, but he should have been able to trust me enough, he should have been able to come to me. his hand is shaking, but the gun hasn't moved from my chest. I can see it in his eyes, the demons fighting for control. He has kept everything bottled up for so long, masking it so much that he has even been able to fool himself. But why should he suffer in silence, this is nothing more than I deserve, I don't understand why he couldn't trust me, couldn't show me his pain. Then again, I guess I do, he really is my brother, he is scared that I will turn away from him, terrified that I won't care, his either terrified that I won't see behind the mask, or scared of what he is hiding behind the mask. How can I possibly show him how much he means to me though when I can't trust him, he lied to me, he used me, he chose that bitch demon over me. does he really believe that saying sorry would make it all better…

His eyes are welling up with tears.

"Dean, you have no idea, no idea what I've done, no idea who I've hurt. People are dead because of me, families are torn apart, I was supposed to save them not destroy them. And now look, I'm about to kill you… maybe you should kill me."

He stares at me. just stares.
"come on man! Your my brother! You can't tell me that this is your fault after months of telling me it's not mine. Yeah we screwed up, we lost people and yeah, I'm tired. I'm hurt and I'm losing faith but it doesn't give you a right to keep walking away! Every time it got hard, every time it didn't go your way, you ran away! And now you're telling me that it's over. You're a solider now man, you fighting in this battle to be free and you want to finish it, you want to just give up because you're scared, because you don't care, well here's what I think, to many innocent people have died, people we loved, people who stood by us. We owe it to them to finish this."

"Have you ever even been in love? Do you even know how horrible it is? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest, it opens up your heart, and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defences, you build up a whole suit of armour, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love. I hate what I have become, Ruby, man ruby, she just got to me and…" the tears are falling freely now, his losing control, "what and I suppose to do Dean, how the hell am I supposed to fix this! How the Hell am I supposed to beat the devil.?"

Well what can I say to that… I open my mouth about to say something stupid and pie related when Cas opens his mouth.

"NO! don't you boys understand it is your destiny."

"Destiny?" I spit "Don't give me that "holy" crap. Destiny, God's plan... It's all a bunch of lies, you poor, stupid son of a b*tch! It's just a way for your bosses to keep me and keep you in line! You know what's real? People, families - that's real. And you're gonna watch them all burn? Sammy are you really going to do this, kill Cas, Kill me because your hurt. I know that, I can see the pain, I can see the anger, the rage burning, but use that to salvage those innocent people. Save this world."

I look at Cas expecting him to reply, what I don't expect is Sammy answering, "What is worth saving? I see nothing but pain here. I see inside you. I see your guilt, your anger, confusion... In Paradise, all is forgiven. You'll be at peace. Even with me."

This is not going how I planned. I was supposed to save him, and I'm watching him fall apart. I'm watching him drift further and further away from reality and I don't know what I can do. So the next best thing, say something stupid and get him off guard, "The gun's filled with rock salt, it's not gonna kill me…"

"haha, no it won't kill you, but it will hurt like hell" he laughs. I stand up tall, Cas is just watching, almost as if he is just waiting, but waiting for what.

"Sammy, I'm sorry" he raises his head and looks me dead in the eyes, his face contorts in agony. "I'm sorry I can't be the big brother that you deserve, I'm sorry that I let you down. I should have been there, I should've been able to save you, done something…"

CAS POINT OF VIEW

These boys will be the death of me, neither of them can see that there trying to save the other. Understand that they will get hurt. Casualties are to be expected in war, but they just can't walk away. These boys will never walk away from each other. Never. Sam lowers the gun, he is beginning to understand now. They both understand, now they have learned that value of pain, the value of brothers. The gun now hangs limply at Sam's side and they just stare at each other. Humans seem to do that a lot. Just stare, but it's like a whole silent conversation is happening between them, understanding is passed through the silences, forgiveness is shown through the tears, and these two boys, no, these two men, these two brothers hug. All is not forgotten, all is not fine or back to normal, but it is a step in the right direction, right now that's all I could really ask for.

They were still hadn't learning that growing up is all about getting hurt. And then getting over it. You hurt. You recover. You move on. Odds are pretty good you're just going to get hurt again. But each time, you learn something.

Each time, you come out of it a little stronger, and at some point, you realize that there are more flavours of pain than coffee. There's the little empty pain of leaving something behind - graduating, taking the next step forward, walking out of something familiar and safe into the unknown. There's the big, whirling pain of life upending all of your plans and expectations. There's the sharp little pains of failure, and the more obscure aches of successes that didn't give you what you thought they would. There are the vicious, stabbing pains of hopes being torn up. The sweet little pains of finding others, giving them your love, and taking joy in their life they grow and learn. There's the steady pain of empathy that you shrug off so you can stand beside a wounded friend and help them bear their burdens.

And if you're very, very lucky, there are a very few blazing hot little pains you feel when you realized that you are standing in a moment of utter perfection, an instant of triumph, or happiness, or mirth pains you feel when you realized that you are standing in a moment of utter perfection, an instant of triumph, or happiness, or mirth which at the same time cannot possibly last - and yet will remain with you for life.

Everyone is down on pain, because they forget something important about it: Pain is for the living. Only the dead don't feel it.

Pain is a part of life. Sometimes it's a big part, and sometimes it isn't, but either way, it's a part of the big puzzle, the deep music, and the great game. Pain does two things: It teaches you, tells you that you're alive. Then it passes away and leaves you changed. It leaves you wiser, sometimes. Sometimes it leaves you stronger. Either way, pain leaves its mark, and everything important that will ever happen to you in life is going to involve it in one degree or another.

They turn and face me Sam cast his teary eyes downwards, "Cas," he begins but I simply hold up my hand, I don't need to hear apologies, I don't want them, they are not the only ones who have learnt something today… Dean tries to speak but I silently plead for him to be silent, and he it.

" I'm sorry you boys had to go through that, but it was necessary for you to prove how much you can count on each other. It was a lesson for the pair of you, the anger you felt Sam, was emphasised by me, you were fighting each other but you didn't know why. You needed to get it out in the open, talk it through and you have done just that. Things might not be perfect right now, but we will get there. And Dean, you were right." The shock in his eyes is humorous, "You can change your own story, you can make your own destiny. So tell me, how the story ends…. "

Ok that was defiantly not how I planned this story to work! I was bored and I just kind of went with it, not really that happy with it though! Any idea's on how to improve it is welcome. Please review, all reviews are welcome, what you liked, what you didn't how I can make this better!