Code of the Ninjurai/Samuinja

By the Qing

Full summary: A half samurai, half ninja warrior (all moron) is sent to destroy Zim once and for all. He appears to be fully prepared to take down the irken invader but he overlooks the greatest threat of all: his own stupidity.

Ch.1 The Power of the DSV!

Location: PLANET DETENTIA,

DSV Headquarters,

On the surface of Planet Detentia in the DSV center, a human-like alien dressed in strange clothing (that seemed to be a cross between a ninja and a samurai) was ranting to a bored vortian lady.

"I am the last of the Ninjurai or Samuinjas! Hiiya!!!"

All of a sudden he chopped the vortian's desk in half. The alien lady just rolled her eyes in reply.

The ranting continued. "What is a Ninjurai you ask, or a Samuinja for that matter." The warrior looked at the vortian for a reply, but got none. "Well anyhow, my father was an galactic samurai from the samurai planet and my mother was a deadly ninja warrior from the ninja planet. Well anyway they got it on and had MEEE!!!! A perfect mix of both warrior races! The ultimate bounty hunting machine! Isn't that impressive?"

The vortian sighed before replying. "Look Mr. Ninja or Samurai or whatever you call yourself."

"Yes?"

"Regardless of your touching introduction, here at the Department of Spacing Violations we enforce our rules and laws with determination. We make universal travel safe and hazard-free as possible." She looked at the Ninjurai/Samuinja who appeared to be half-asleep. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Huh, oh yeah. By the way can I have my spaceship back now, please?"

"No."

The warrior hybrid was clearly confused. "What do you mean no? It's just a small spaceship! Couldn't you cut me some slack?"

"Like I said, here at the DSV we take no favorites, or cut anyone any slack! We even confiscated The Massive once! If you want your ship back there are tests to do, forms to sign, penalties to pay, and don't forget the tip!" the vortian pressed a button on the right half of her destroyed desk…and a huge pile of papers fell from the ceiling and crushed the Ninjurai.

A feeble ouch could be heard from the bottom of the pile followed by the scribbling of a pen. After a while a small beeping noise came from the pile. "Yeesss!!!!!!!! Hiiya!!!!" The Samiunja emerged from the pile triumphant. "That was my job alert watch! Someone must require my INCREDIBLE TALENTS!!!! Let's see what it is!" he pressed a button on his watch and a small hologram screen came out with a message. "Hmmm…an unnamed client wishes that an irken named Zim must be destroyed. And the reward is…500,000 monies!!! Yes, I will do it! To honor my warrior heritage I will not rest until my target is destroyed and I get paid!" he was about to go to Earth and kill Zim when he realized his spaceship was still detained. "After I have completed my paperwork, accomplish the tests, pay for my penalties…and give a tip."