A/N: Hi there. (: So, I wrote this on Mother's Day. I was in my car and Father of Mine by: Everclear came on and yeah, the idea just popped into my head. The ending could have been better. I pictured it much angsty-er in my head. But I had a brain fart and that's all that came out. Maybe i'll re-write it later.
I hope you enjoy it. Oh, and happy belated Mother's Day to the all Mamas' out there. I know I love my mom. (:
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Literally, my parents buy me everything.
-X-X-X-X
EPOV
I was ten years old when my father left us. Edward Masen Sr. had left me and my mother for his secretary, Elizabeth. My mother, Esme, had found out about his affair and confronted him about it. He didn't try to deny it.
He had said that their marriage hadn't been right in a long time. They loved too little and fought too much. She worked too much, she was never around, she didn't have time for him, he had said. In truth it was all him. He was the one that missed dinners, he was never around, he always canceled.
To my mother family came first. I came first to her. I really loved my mom.
She was through with him and his lies. She'd had enough of him missing my soccer games and piano concerts and just letting me down. She hated the sad and disappointed look on my face everytime he called and said he couldn't make my game or my recital because he had to work.
He told her he didn't love her anymore and that he loved Elizabeth.
She told him to pack his bags and go. So he packed, got into his car and drove off. He didn't even say bye to me.
It's been twenty-three years since then. Haven't seen him since.
-X-X-X-X-X
My mom had to work more and book more clients to pay the mortgage on our ridiculously expensive mansion, on the bills, put food on the table and provide me with everything I needed. A few months later my mom decided that the house in Chicago's upper-class suburbs wasn't worth all the extra hours that she was working instead of spending it with me.
She felt like she was neglecting me and so she sat me down and asked, "Eddie, if you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?" I preferred Eddie. I was a kid, I didn't need such a formal name. Eddie was just fine.
I didn't even hesitate before I shouted, "New York! The city that never sleeps!" Mom though it was a pretty good place to start over. So we moved. We left Chicago without even a glance back. There was nothing there left for us.
We moved to Brooklyn Heights. Now, don't knock it till you try it. Brooklyn Heights isn't as bad as people think. I made many friends there during my first week of arriving. Eric, Tyler, Mike, Jameson and Vicky. The coolest thing was that they weren't just one ethnicity. They were mixed and they could speak more than one language. Eric was Korean and Cambodian, Tyler was Jamaican and Italian, Mike was Italian and Greek, Jameson was Irish and Cuban and Vicky was Polish, Greek, Irish and German.
I picked up a few words from them, it was fun when I went over to their houses for dinner. There was always something new and different to try.
My mom made a very nice income as a well-known Interior Designer. She had her own business and was her own boss but celebrities were all about having the best of the best pads. She really did work hard and the celebrities paid well. My mom also had money saved up for me since before I was born. She came from old money.
-X-X-X-X-X
We moved in with my aunt Tanya, my mom's younger sister, and her husband, my uncle Nahuel. They were really nice people. I had only seen them a handful of times before then. They were really fun and easy to get along with. They really liked kids and were trying to get pregnant.
After the divorce between my parents was settled my mother received two million in alimony and my father sent us two-thousand a month as child support. My mom got full-custody. Since I was enrolled in a private catholic school in Chicago my mom decided to enroll me once again into a catholic school. My uncle drove me to school on the mornings my mom couldn't. St. James & St. Joseph elementary school was about an hour away.
We only lived there for the school year. We moved into our own place in Park Slope in late June. My mom didn't want for us to stay with Aunt Tanya longer than we had to. Something about visitors and fish stinking after three days. I didn't get it at the time. But I do remember I was terribly sad to say bye to all of my friends.
-X-X-X-X-X
We got a brownstone and there were people everywhere. On their front steps, on the sidewalk, in the park, running across streets, riding their bikes, walking their dogs. It was much livelier here. We lived near Prospect Park, my favorite park.
Prospect Park was one of the main reasons my mom moved us here. She wanted me to be able to go to the park whenever I wanted to. She knew that I missed playing on a soccer team. I did spend a lot of time in the park, practicing with my soccer ball. I remember that I wanted to be a famous soccer player one day and play for Manchester United.
I loved the bike trails there. The first time I tried to get up a hill on my bike I nearly cried I was so exhausted. A middle-aged man on his bike stopped and hopped off his bike, walking over to me. His name was Kaius the fourth, but he went by Kai. He told me that when he first went up the hill on his bike with his father almost twenty-seven years ago, he jumped off his bike and threw a fit. His father had told him to suck it up and push. So he did. He grabbed the handlebars and ran up the hill. So he told me to suck it up and push. So I did. Eventually I conquered that hill. Going downhill was the best part.
Saturdays were 'Attack-the-hill' day, every other day was for soccer.
My mom would sit a few feet away on a old blanket and read, watching me and making sure I stayed safe.
Kai was there everyday in his biking gear, he was a marathon bicyclist. I never actually spoke to him again but he would see me kicking my soccer ball around in the grass as he rode by and shout out at me "Suck it up and push, Eddie!" chuckling and riding away. I would grin and wave and that was our thing.
He was as close to a father figure as I could find. I really wished I had my dad around. Eventually Kai started bringing his seven-year-old son with him and suddenly I was left alone again.
-X-X-X-X-X
I made new friends the first day I went to the park on my own. Emmett McCarty, Jasper Hale and Jacob Black were instantly my best friends. They were on a street soccer team and taught me the basics. There were no rules. My mom didn't like that very much but there weren't that many soccer teams around so she let me play as long as I didn't get too injured. I learned that they attended M.S. 51, a middle school nearby. I had pleaded with my mom to enroll me there. Two days later I was also a student at M.S. 51 William Alexander.
I remember thinking the coolest thing about my house was that it was castle-like. Many buildings in New York were. Like, the schools, houses of worship, brownstones, apartment buildings, etc..
Every brownstone on my block had people who lived in the apartment-like pads under their house. They had their own small staircarse. It was pretty cool. Jacob lived under mine. His family always invited me over for dinner when my mom had difficult clients and had to stay late at her office. I remember the first time feeling so out of place. My pale skin sticking out amongst their tanned skin. They were Puerto Rican and Native American. I felt like they could smell the pure Italian on me. I was a silly kid. They were some of the kindest people I ever met.
Jacob had many siblings, but only four lived at home with him and his parents. His two older sisters Rachel and Rebecca and his older brothers Jared and Embry. It was packed but they didn't mind. His mom was a plump, short woman with the warmest smile. She smelled like Orange rice and sugar cookies. Sarah was really sweet and I loved her motherly hugs. Not as much as my mom's hugs though.
-X-X-X-X-X
His dad William, or Billy, always gave us advice for when we were men after he would get home from work. He was a Limo driver. He gave us the real deal. Advice that would help in the future, he didn't sugar coat. Then he would ask Jacob to fetch him a Modelo, his favorite beer, in spanish. I remember it being his fault my mom punished me for cursing in spanish. He laughed so hard when I told him. "Ay, Chamaco tonto. Los gringos siempre saben cuando dices algo no 'stas supuesto a dicer."
I tried to understand what he said but failed. Jacob whispered the translation to me and I let out a short laugh. Because it was true. My mom knew enough spanish to know that I had said something I wasn't suppose to.
He sometimes really made me miss having my dad around. My dad wasn't always a douche. He was really a good dad when I was little. He used to call me Junior. I was his golden boy he would say.
He always took me somewhere new every weekend. He would take me to fairs, carnivals, museums, to the movie theaters, to the beach. He would hold my hand when we crossed streets and around big crowds and hoist me up on his shoulders when I couldn't see. He would point out everything and tell me stories about them. I'm pretty sure he made up the stories half the time, but I didn't care. Because when I was little I loved hearing his voice. My dad was my hero. Of course that changed.
Now he barely called. When he did I wouldn't take the call and my mom would tell him I was busy or out with friends. He sent me cards on Christmases and birthdays, each card containing a crisp hundred dollar bill with the same message. He always got my age wrong.
Hey Soccer player,
Have a great day today. You're ten today! That's a pretty big number. Your present is in the mail. Be good for your mom. Here's a hundred to spend on whatever you want. Dad's treat.
Love you, Junior.
-Dad
I hated to be called Junior after he left. He always got me exactly what I wanted...the year before. I had turned eleven that day. My mom would shake her head, when my shoulders would sag after reading his card and opening his present.
"Dammit, Ed." She would say cursing him then she would take out a hidden present, one more extra than I had asked for, saying "I couldn't help it. You're my baby boy. I'm suppose to smother you and embarrass you in front of your friends and spoil you rotten." I would grin at her and she would wave her hand at me while scooping up a chunk of birthday cake with her fork.
"Hurry up, kid! Open your present! I'm excited!" I would tear the wrapping paper off and tackle my mom in a hug, because she always saved the best for last.
I loved my birthday that summer. I got to have all of my friends over the next day to play videogames and soccer and eat more cake. Emmett had brought his younger sister Alice over and Jasper brought his twin sister Rosalie. Jake brought Embry and we all drove my mom crazy. Running around, screaming, laughing, throwing waterballoons and shooting our waterguns at eachother outside in the street. The older kids down the street had opened the fire hydrant and blasts of water was shooting out. Everybody was running through the water in their bathing suits. It was a great summer to start off my new life.
My mom had always been friendly with our neighbor Mr. Cullen. He was a genuinely nice man. He was really funny too. He was my mom's age and lived alone in the brownstone next-door. He was a Cardiologist and coincidentally Emmett and Alice's uncle. They were always at his house. He loved kids and always wanted a family of his own but never found anybody to settle down with because of his demanding job. So he settled for spoiling his nieces and nephew. He had a game room just for them.
-X-X-X-X-X
When my mom would have to leave on business trips she either always left me with the Blacks' or under Mr. Cullen's care. My mom wanted for me to be under Mr. Cullen's care more than the Blacks' because she felt bad. They had enough kids to watch after without adding me to the mix. But they never complained and took me in on rare nights with open arms. Mr. Cullen volunteered to take me in whenever she needed and he did have more space in his house than the Blacks'.
It was close to Halloween and Mr. Cullen had taken us costume shopping. Emmett picked a Warrior outfit and Alice picked an Angel. I shuffled my feet awkwardly and picked out a Soccer player costume. Mr. Cullen smiled at me when we were paying and swatted at my hands when I reached for my wallet.
"Hey! Your money's not to leave your wallet, Eddie. Not when you're under my care. I will treat you as if you're family. I got it, okay?" I nodded hesitantly and smiled.
"Alright. If you're sure. Thanks so much, Mr. Cullen!"
"Call me Carlisle."
So then he became Carlisle.
We went back to Carlisle's house and I was playing videogames with Emmett and Alice when my mom came back from one of her business trips. Halloween was next weekend and I was excited to show her my costume.
I hadn't heard her come in and was on my way to ask Carlisle if he knew when my mom was suppose to arrive when I walked into the foyer and saw them making out.
"Ew." Alice whispered somewhere near my elbow. She was crouching and peeking around the corner.
"Ew is right. Come on! You guys are old!" Em shouted, grossed out. They instantly broke apart, their eyes wide. I elbowed him in the gut. "Idiot!"
I looked back at them. "So, hi. I can see how much I was missed. How was your trip?" I grinned. My mom was blushing but smiled and hugged me tight. "Shut up. I did miss you and your messy hair. My baby boy." She squeezed me and kissed me all over my face.
"Jeez, cut it out! Okay, okay! You've made your point. I'm embarrassed!" I laughed, pushing her away lightly. She laughed and wrapped her arm around my neck. "Say bye to your friends, babe. We need to go home. One, we need to talk and two, I really missed you, Eddie."
"Bye, kids." My mom waved. Emmett and Alice were standing stock still in front of us with the biggest grins ever on their faces.
"Bye, Mrs. Edward's mom!" They waved erratically before sliding their eyes deviously over to me.
"Bye, Eddie." Alice and Em laughed and wiggled their fingers at me. I scowled playfully at my mom. "You realize this is your fault, right?" She rolled her eyes and ruffled my hair and said a more appropriate 'bye' to Carlisle.
"Bye, Mr. I-got-game." I joked and shook his hand. He grinned. "See ya, Eddie."
That night my mom told me that she had secretly been seeing Carlisle for the past few months and really liked him. She said that they were planning on telling me that they had made it official. But I had made it easy for them with my accidental snooping. So Carlisle was now Dr. Carlisle Cullen, Cardiologist, dedicated worker, funny man, my mom's boyfriend.
He made her smile and all I wanted was for my mom to be happy. I didn't want her alone, she always put me first and took care of me. She needed to be taken care of too.
-X-X-X-X-X
I met Bella Marie Swan on Halloween. She was dressed as Joan Jett, with a killer wig and attitude. She was Alice's cousin that had just moved across the street and Carlisle's other niece. She was Carlisle's older half-brother Charlie's daughter. She was originally from Park Slope but moved to Queens then to Manhattan and was now back in Park Slope.
She was really sarcastic and snarky and loved music. She was a tomboy but could be girly if she wanted to be. She also had what I liked to call "A New York Accent." But apparently I was the one with the accent. She was really into music and she, Jasper, and I attended music classes at The Brooklyn Conservatory of Music. I already knew how to play the piano so I took guitar and added on a drum class after Bella told me she was taking guitar and drum. Jasper wanted to learn how to play the piano and his mom forced him to take Cello lessons as well.
Bella became my best friend. I could talk to her about anything. I told her about my 'daddy issues' as she liked to call it and she listened and helped me get all the negative out.
She said that her dad had 'daddy issues' when he was younger too but that his step-dad was a great dad. Bella loved her Pop-pop Elliott. Carlisle, his older brother Christian and Charlie all had the same mother. But Charlie's dad had left them when he was only a year old. His mom met and married a man named Elliott Cullen a year later. A few years after that Chris was born and then shortly after, Carlisle. But they were tremenduosly close, nothing could seperate the "Cullen brothers" except Charlie had always legally kept his real father's last name, Swan.
Elliott Cullen raised Charlie into the man he is today and always loved him as his own. He had drilled it into his sons' minds that no matter the problem that the child is innocent and cannot be blamed. I loved my pop-pop Elliott.
-X-X-X-X-X
Bella was there when my mom announced, at the New Year's Eve party we were having at my house, that she and Carlisle were in love and engaged. She thought I would break down. But I was ecstatic and ran over and gave them both a bear hug. Carlisle was a great guy and I really thought he was worthy of my mother.
He later on pulled me aside and asked me if I was sincerely okay that they were engaged. To which I nodded. Because I really wanted him as a step-dad.
By February we were all settled into Carlisle's house and they were married in July. I was a Groomsmen along with Em and Ali's dad, Christian and Carlisle's best friend Aro. Carlisle's best man was Charlie, Bella's dad.
My mom's Maid of Honor was my aunt Tanya, whom had hugged the life out of me before exclaiming that I was gonna be a big cousin because she was three months pregnant. Which was great news that I happily congratulated her for...after I could breathe again that is.
My mom's bridesmaids were Bella, at my insistence and also because my mom really liked her. Renee, Bella's mom and my mom's newest best friend. And my mother's older sister, Carmen. Whom I didn't really know all that well because she lived in Springfield but she was nice enough.
Bella, Jasper and I played a Beatles song for my mom and Carlisle at the reception. Bella, of course was on the drums, because she loved Ringo. He was her favorite Beatle. We then played a cover of Ben's Brother's song "Stuttering".
My mom loved it, she rushed up, hugged the three of us, applauded at our skill, and cried and hugged me again and told me she loved me about ten times. I asked her if she was pregnant. She laughed, conked me on the head and called me a smartass then proceeded to tell everyone that she was selling me for a dollar. Which made them laugh and me hide behind Bella.
For their honeymoon they went to Italy for two weeks then spent another two weeks in England. I was left under my aunt Tanya's care. She and my uncle stayed at our house. By our house I meant Carlisle's brownstone.
My mom and Carlisle called me every night and asked about my day and wished me a goodnight. Carlisle asked if it was alright to tell me that he loved me. I said yeah, 'cause I loved him too. He then asked if it was okay to call me "Son," and I answered, "Only if I can call you dad." he chuckled as my mom sniffled over the phone. "It's a deal."
"My boys." My mom's teary voice cracked. "Mom, you're ruining the moment." I teased and Carlisle guffawed at my mom's affronted scoff. "I'm gone for a month and already I'm kicked to the curb! Don't you miss me, Eddie?"
"Mom." I whined, "Yeah, I miss you. Okay?" I yawned but tried to cover it up. "I miss you too, baby. We'll be home soon. Be good for your aunt Tanya and uncle Nahuel. Go to sleep. I love you so much, Eddie." her voice was soft and soothing.
"Kay, I love you too, mom...I love you, dad." I whispered. I heard a sigh of relief over the phone. "I love you too, son. We'll be home soon. Goodnight."
Turns out my mom was pregnant during her wedding, about two months. She had my little sister Grace "Gracie" Arianna Cullen six months after returning from their honeymoon. Carlisle was a great dad to both me and Gracie.
-X-X-X-X-X
I was so grateful for him. He helped me through my awkward teen years, he cared for me, he loved me. He was there to take me and my friends to go see the Yankees play at Yankee Stadium. He bought me souveniers and would put his arm around my neck, ruffle my messy hair, and happily introduce me as his son or 'my boy' to people who knew him. I loved it. Or he would take us to Prospect Park to play soccer with us. He bought me a Gibson acoustic guitar, a 70th Anniversay John Lennon J-160E, a guitar that cost almost five-thousand dollars, for my twelfth birthday that year before they were married. He bought me a white grand piano with black keys, a Baldwin Grand 275, for my thirteenth birthday. He also bought me a Les Paul electric for Christmas.
He had said that he had started learning how to play the guitar when he was my age.
He saw how much I wanted a dog so two weeks after Christmas I came home and found a blue-nosed pitbull puppy with a white patch on his left eye sitting on my bed and chewing on my pillow. "No way!" I scooped him up and ran downstairs and saw my parents exchange grins and knowing glances. My mom continued on feeding Gracie.
"What?" She asked innocently. "You know what. Does this mean I can keep him! What's his name? It is a 'he' right?" I checked quicky and nodded. "He's a he."
"He is yours. We got him at the pound." Dad chuckled. "He doesn't have a name yet. Up to you, Eddie."
"Thank you! You guys are the best! I'm gonna go tell everyone. Bye! Love you! Later Grace!" I raced out into the street where I saw Bella and Jake heading in my direction.
"Bells! Jake! My dad got me a Pit!" Their eyes grew wider than saucers and they started running towards me.
"He's legit, dude!" Bella high-fived me.
"Aw, he's so cute!" Jake gushed.
Bella and I both turned to look at Jake, quirking our brows at him. "What? He is cute." He said defensively, turning red.
We laughed at him and he scowled at us. "Yeah, he's cute alright. But he's a pit, so he needs a badass name." I said, frowning at the puppy who licked my nose.
"How about Francis? That sounds threatening!" Bella exclaimed, I nodded thinking it over.
"That sounds lame. Walter would be a more threatening name." Jake reached over to pet the puppy but Bella smacked his hand and pinched his side. "Say sorry. You were mean."
"Gah, fine! Sorry."
"Tyson! Tyson is his name." I decided. I looked at the puppy. He looked like a Tyson to me.
"Why Tyson?" I pointed at the garbage where a Tyson chicken appetizers wrapper laid on the floor.
"You named your dog after food. That's how I know you're a dude." Bella sighed.
-X-X-X-X-X
He was a great dad not because he bought me things, that's what I had my father's money for, Carlisle was a great dad to me because he was always there for me. He taught me how to drive and took me to get my permit when I was sixteen and then later on my license. He taught me how to ride a motorcycle. He helped me practice for my soccer games and was always there cheering me on, along with my mom, my little sister and Bella, who was my girlfriend by that time.
Bella and I had been together since my fifteenth birthday. My dad didn't have anybody living below him anymore so he had my instruments moved down there. We couldn't get the piano down there so we had to settle for a keyboard. It was our spot, our place to play music. Many nights me and my friends could be found passed out on the fuzzy blue rug or the couches.
Gracie loved to come downstairs and hear us play. She was the cutest kid and had us all wrapped around her tiny fingers. Especially me. She couldn't really say my name or "Eddie" for that matter so she called me "Dee," I didn't mind at all.
Bella loved playing with Gracie. "God, Edward. She's so cute! What happened to you?" She teased, tickling Gracie. I smirked and held my ear close to my guitar's sound hole, trying to tune my sixth string back to "E". "Different gene pool. And you can't really be talking right now, seeing as you like me and are currently dating me. You have to like something about me." I poked my tongue out at her and strummed my guitar, making sure it sounded right.
She blew a raspberry at me. "Nah, I'm just with you for your brains. Do you know how hard it is to find a smart nerd these days and have them do your homework for free?" I laughed and she turned Gracie to face her. "Screw teen-angst books. Read the encyclopedia. Be smart." Gracie blinked at her and grabbed her face. "Okay, like Dee?" she pointed at me. "Exactly like me, Grace." I blew her a kiss and began playing the intro to a new song I was writing.
My dad was a great doctor. He loved what he did and I wanted that. He took me to work with him on take your kid to work day every year. But when I was sixteen it felt different. I followed him around and everyone threw kind smiles and greeted me as Cullen's kid or Carlisle's boy. I loved it. I saw how everyone greeted him warmly and how the patients seemed to love him and how the other doctors respected him. I wanted that.
That day changed my life. I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. Just like my dad. Maybe not a Cardiologist but maybe a Hospitalist. It sounded like a good job. I sat down in his office and told him of my decision. His face split into the widest grin and he walked around and drew me into a hug.
"I feel so honored that you want to follow in my footsteps. I'm so proud of you. I know i'm not your real dad, I'd always thought you would want to be a lawyer just like him."
"You are my real dad. He's nothing but a sperm donor, just a monthly paycheck. You're my dad and my hero."
I graduated two years later. I also legally changed my name to Cullen. As much as Bella said that I was a genius and that she was only with me for my brains, it was all to downplay how smart she really was. She was the actual Einstein. She was Valedictorian and made an incredible speech. We threw our graduation caps up into the air when we were given the 'Okay'. We said our final goodbyes to our high school. Jake, me and Bella attended NYU and Em, Rose, Jazz and Ali went to Columbia.
Jazz and Ali had a great big wedding during their third year of college. They had a son named Jaxon. Jake met this sporty, pretty girl named Leah during our first year of college and they had a small wedding and a very much loved 'Oops baby', Claire, two years later. Em and Rose were the last to get married, they eloped, but were the first to have kids. Two girls, Emma and Madeline.
Bella majored in music and became a guitar teacher at one of the private high schools near our apartment in Park Slope. We couldn't say goodbye to our park, so we made the long commute to work and school everyday.
I went onto Med school. I proposed to Bella during one of her classes. The kids were really silly and were pretty amazing guitarists, after I walked in and started my speech they began playing the wedding march.
We still laughed at the weirdness of our family tree. I had belatedly realized that the love of my life was technically my step-cousin. It was a good thing we weren't blood related. It would get real awkward if we were. Not to mention illegal.
We were married eight months later. A year and five months after that we had our first son, Kaien Anthony Cullen. Three years after him we had Jace Alexander Cullen. We gave Jace my dad's middle name. As much as I loved my dad, I didn't want to give my kid such an old-fashioned name. I didn't want to call him Carl for short either. My dad agreed whole-heartedly.
They were spoiled rotten by their grandparents, aunts and uncles.
-X-X-X-X-X
Gracie babysat often.
I remember when she was a baby. Chubby, smiling, toothless and drooly. And now she had a boyfriend and was driving and was a total girl around him. It killed me to see Gracie all grown up. I loved my kids, they were my world. But Gracie had a special place in my heart too.
She was my first baby. She was my baby sister. I took care of her. I would volunteer to feed her and burp her. I loved helping my parents with her. I loved having her around, I always wanted to be holding her. She was so cute.
My dad made sure I knew how to change diapers. He had said if I learned now it would come in handy in the future.
Her first word wasn't mama or dada. It was Dee. I couldn't stop smiling or bragging about it for a week. When my parents couldn't get her to sleep they would find me and lay her on my chest and off to sleep she would go. As she got older she picked up a habit of grabbing onto my ear as she was drifting off. She would hold on and squeeze lightly and once my ear became warm she would switch to the other. She took her first steps towards me when I was practicing a song on the couch when I was fourteen. She was a late walker, for sure. She had been about a year and six months.
My mom flipped out and ran around trying to find the camera, all the while screaming at me to hold Gracie still until she found it. Just as my mom had found it, Gracie plopped down in front of me and banged her hand on my guitar and blinked at me, her pacifier hanging out the side of her mouth. My mom had huffed at the missed chance and stomped away to sulk.
"Hey, booboo. What'ya want? Wanna hear a song I just learned? It's by Journey and it's called Don't Stop Believing. I don't normally sing, so don't laugh. This is just for you, Gracie." I lifted my guitar and scooped her up and placed her next to me on the couch. I had had my guitar for almost two years around that time and had been trying to write my own songs. It wasn't easy, but the first song I ever wrote was for my baby sister. I wrote it when I was sixteen, I named it Graceland. As she got older that song was a must on her birthdays or really whenever. She said it was the only present she wanted from me.
She was just the coolest kid. If she had big news she always told me first. She was our band's number one fan. And she cried her eyes out when I went away for college. But I made sure we didn't live too far from eachother. I missed my favorite blonde. As she grew her hair darkened and before we knew it her trademark blonde, curly hair she got from dad was replaced with my mom's straight, black hair. Gracie had thick black hair, which she never dyed. I sometimes missed her cute blonde curls that she had as a kid. But she was radiant with her dark hair and hazel eyes. We were still as close as ever and I would forever be her "Dee". She was my little monkey. A name she earned when she would spontaneously show up at our place with my parents in tow, and tackle me into her gripping hugs. She loved hopping onto my back and demanding I be her royal horse. I couldn't deny the kid her piggyback ride.
-X-X-X-X-X
I studied to be a Hospitalist, I was now thirty-three. It was my first year working at Manhattan Presbytarian Hospital alongside my father.
"Dr. Cullen! I just passed by your dad, he was looking for you." A nurse from the fifth floor called out. I chugged my water and took off down the hall. I skidded to a stop in front of my amused-looking dad. "Sorry I'm late. I was thirsty." I panted.
He smirked. "There was water right there." He pointed behind himself. "What!" I looked over his shoulder and surely enough there was the water.
"I worry about you sometimes. Can't even find water." he murmured jokingly, walking off.
"Shut up, Dr. Jerkface." I grumbled.
He opened the door. "Come along, my shadow. We have work to do." I walked in.
"Hello there, sir. I am Dr. Carlisle Cullen and this is my son Dr. Edward Cullen. I'm just showing him the ropes, he's new." My dad said smiling and reading over the frail man's chart.
"Hmm, heart problems, I see. Well let's see what we've got here, Mr. Masen." He handed me the file and walked over to the man.
I froze and my head shot up. "Mr. Masen?" The old man nodded, staring at me with grey eyes.
"Uh,"
"Edward? What is it, son?" My dad's eyes were confused.
"Uh, no...no, nothing. I'm good."
My dad finished up checking Mr. Masen and was writing down some new notes in his file.
"You know, you remind me of my boy. His name was Edward, too. I haven't seen him in years though. Eversince he and his mother left me." Carlisle's eyes shot to me. I scowled at Mr. Masen.
"You left us, you bastard. You couldn't keep it in your goddamn pants. Don't make mom seem like the bad guy here. It's your fault, not hers. You were never there for me. Mom wanted what was best for me."
Mr. Masen's eyes bulged. "You're my boy? Junior?"
"I was. I'm Edward Cullen now." I said proudly.
"He's my boy." Carlisle squeezed my shoulder, pride in his words.
"He's my son. Don't you dare take him from me. He's my flesh and blood, not yours." Masen spat.
"You're just a sperm donor, Masen. Carlisle is my dad. He's been there for me, whenever I needed him he was there. He loves me, he cares about me. He is my dad." I growled.
"He may not be my flesh and blood, but he might as well be." my dad always spoke calmly. I've never heard him yell. "I have other patients. You can handle this?" I nodded. "You can finish up here and say your peace if you'd like, Dee. I'll send in a nurse."
I nodded. "Thanks, dad." He walked out and I turned to Masen.
"So, he's why you never called me back or came to visit." Masen coughed bitterly.
"No, the reason I didn't do either of those things was because I hated you. You walked away, just like that. So easily, for that woman. It hurt. You didn't even say goodbye. I got over it and Carlisle just became my dad." I grabbed a chair and dragged it towards me and sat.
"What are you doing here? In New York, I mean." I crossed my arms.
He sighed. "I missed you, Junior. I asked around and heard from a friend that you were living in Parkslope with your lady a few years ago. So me and Liz packed up and moved closer. I've been hoping to catch a glimpse of you, but never had the chance. Until now, I guess it's lucky that I have heart problems, eh?" He let out a dry chuckle.
I just stared.
"I was good to you, wasn't I? I sent you money. I kept you and your mother living comfortably. Why do you hate me so much, Junior? You used to love your old man. You once told me I was your hero." He said his eyes cast down.
"That was a long time ago. You left and I realized that my father wasn't fit to be my hero, you didn't even care about me. Carlisle and my best friend Jake's dad were the only father figures that I had. Carlisle eventually did become my step-dad. And he was fantastic at it.
I grew up happy. He was always at my soccer games cheering me on, he created a space for me and my band to practice, he got us gigs, he taught me how to drive a car, how to be a gentleman, he taught me how women were always right, without them men would be nothing. He taught me how to fix my car, how to cook and do my own laundry the right way, he taught me how to shave, how to ride a motorcycle, he took me to work and showed me the ropes, he taught me how to work hard for things that I wanted, he was proud of me when I got accepted into NYU, he went with me to pick out Bella's ring, he made sure I behaved at my bachelor party, he gave me my father-son talk when I had the nerves before my wedding, he gave a speech about how proud he was of me."
I smiled and took out the chain he gave me. There was a black guitar pick at the end. "This was his most prized possession when he was a kid. He went to a Nirvana concert in Seattle with his two buddies and he caught Kurt Cobain's pick. He gave this to me when I was eighteen, the day I officially changed my last name." I re-tucked it and patted it over my shirt.
"You're my father, but he's my dad. Anybody can be a father. A father is basically a sperm donor. It takes a kind and caring man to be a dad. Like Carlisle. "Masen's eyes watered and he fidgeted with his blanket.
"I'm sorry, Junior." His rough voice wavered. I pursed my lips.
I took my wallet out.
"I have two kids. Boys. They look just like their beautiful mother." I took out our family picture we took for Easter.
Kaien's shaggy curls combed neatly. Bella made him wear a white button up with khaki pants and a light green sweater vest. He begged to wear his new converse though. She let him. I wore the exact same thing Kaien wore. Little Jace had his normally cool-kid fauxhawk combed to the side. He was wearing a green button up and a white sweater vest and khaki pants. Bella had wore a light green and yellow dress with a white cardigan. The picture always made me smile because even though were were all on our best behavior and smiling, Kaien's big smile with two missing teeth made the picture goofy.
"That's Kaien and that's Jace. And that's my Bella."
"Those your kids, eh? They're pretty damn cute, Junior. And you're wife is beautiful, just like her name says." He smiled at the sight of my family but then ducked his head and looked at me from the corner of his eye, I grabbed the picture and put it away.
"I know you said you're sorry. But I'm not, though. I'm...thankful. Carlisle's the best dad I could have asked for. If anything, you did me a favor. I know that I will try my very hardest to never be like you. Because my sons and my wife mean the world to me and I would never jeopardize losing them for anything. And I swear i'm not going to let them know all the pain I've known. The pain of my own father leaving me. Not even caring enough to say goodbye. I will never hurt them. I've gone through a lot because of you. But I had mom, Carlisle, my little sister Gracie, Bella and my best friends. I had the best life. I never wanted for anything. I was loved and cared for. So, thank you for leaving."
The End.
-X-X-X-X
A/N: Hit or miss? I think it could have been better.