All That You Are
Summary; She was a smoker and a drinker, maybe even partied too hard. And he was one of the few people that didn't want to change her. AU
Warning; Just a warning to younger viewers, there is tons of swearing in this, maybe not this chapter but in general this story will contain lots and lots of swearing. There will be violence, not much, but there will be some. There will be drinking, partying, minor sexual content--meaning groping and talking about sex, etc. Smoking will be in almost every chapter. There might even be drugs and cutting as well. There will be talk about eating disorders, and lots of family issues, one or a few chapters might have abuse. And teenage pregnancy is mentioned in the story as well. So please, if you find a problem with reading these, you have been warned.
Disclaimer; I do not have any ownership in the Naturo anime or manga, I am simply a girl trying to write a good story for people to enjoy.
Author's Note; Just so everyone is clear, this is a very AU story. Also this chapter, like in most stories, is the backbone chapter, meaning everything that is in this chapter is important to the plot, characters or is explaining something. The next two chapters (chapters two and three) will most likely be similar in that context, just because if you have no sense of who the characters are before then you will have every little sense of how they've changed and grown or fallen down, etc.
"You know you really should stop," Tenten said as she peered over the top of her gossip magazine. "I thought you were trying to shake that habit."
Sakura looked at her and rolled her eyes. "Right, like that is going to happen," she said, continuing what she was doing before, and that was lighting her cigarette. She took the cigarette between her thumb and her index finger and pulled it away from her face, breathing out the smoke. "I really tried to quit, it was just too hard and not for me," she told her best friend, raising the cigarette back up to her mouth.
Tenten wrinkled her nose, she wanted to be a nurse when she was older and graduated from college, she might even what to be a physical therapist or something along those lines. "At least try not to blow the smoke at me if you're going to do that."
"At least we're outside," Sakura said lightly, leaning back in her pool chair. This was how most of the summer days went for Sakura, she would sit outside with Tenten, listening to the hum of cars go by on the street as they lounged by the pool, gossiping about what they were going to do now that they were seniors.
Tenten set her gossip magazine down and sighed lightly, standing up. "I'm going to get some nail polish to paint my toe nails," she told Sakura before going to enter her house.
Sakura let out another puff of smoke, placing the cigarette back on her lips. She never thought that she would be a smoker, then again she never really thought that she would have gotten her stomach pumped twice before she was even eighteen. Sakura had always been the more capable of the two of them, she had always been the one person to take control. She lived her life the way she wanted to.
But then, much to her dismay, her parents split. She was angry at first, depressed and confused. And she went off and started to drink vodka straight and smoke cigarettes. Tenten was really the only person that had been there for her. Sure there was other people that she could talk to but there was really no one like Tenten.
Sakura and Tenten had been next door neighbors for as long as Sakura could remember, they never really talked when they were younger. Sakura hung out with the 'popular crowd' or the 'private school crowd' and they were needless to say, very straight laced. Sakura's parents had money, and Tenten's did not. Which was why Tenten found herself in public schooling. Sakura started going to Konoha Community School when she was a sophomore, and when she had to ask Tenten for a ride to school one winter morning because her car was in the shop, the two became friends. And about a year or so ago they started calling one another; best friends.
Tenten had been the only person that asked Sakura if she was okay, when they first started being friends, maybe even before that, Tenten just asked Sakura if she wanted to talk about it. Of course Tenten knew that Sakura's parents were no longer together. But Sakura was grateful for having Tenten in her life. She always made Sakura feel better about herself when things were bad.
The brunette opened the patio door, stepping out and shutting it behind her. She sat back down in the chair she had been sitting in a few minutes before. Then she took a hair tie and quickly put her long brown hair back away from her face. "I brought out gold and navy because, well that's our school colors and the big football game is tonight," Tenten reminded her, as if Sakura really needed reminding of that. "Here," she said, holding out the navy polish to Sakura.
Sakura took one last puff of her cigarette, and then tossed it on the patio, crushing it with the heel of her foot. "Remind me why we are going," Sakura asked her, uncapping the dark polish. "Because I thought when I told you I didn't want to go you said 'that's fine'."
Tenten looked up at Sakura. "You're really still mad about that."
"Who wouldn't be Tenten; he went off and slept with some tramp. And got her pregnant! That's a total shoe-in to be mad at him for as long as I want to be," Sakura retorted bitingly. She started to paint her toe nails, carefully not trying to get any on parts that weren't her toes. "He cheated Tenten, and I can't forgive him for that."
"Sakura, I know that he betrayed you. I know he did, but… maybe you should play the field now, stop trying to fall for the bad boys. The players. It wasn't Sasuke's fault, I think it's just his personality. And you were in a state of weakest and he took control of that," Tenten said, bending over as far as she could to blow on her toes. "Besides it's been seven months now since you two broke up. I think you should move on, it's what's best."
The pink haired girl looked at her friend, who was concentrating on her toes at the moment. "Tenten," she said slowly "I loved him." She paused. "But I think that you're right. It's time for a change. I need to get over him. It wasn't like he was my only boyfriend I mean there was, Gaara, which ended okay, I mean I still talk to him. Then was Lee, which was more or less a pity thing. After Lee there was Shikamaru and I am still close friends with him, wouldn't you say."
"Yeah, he eats with us at lunch sometimes. He comes to most of your parties, he eats most of the food and sleeps but yeah I would say you are friends with him still. Kind of like how I am still friends with Neji, even though we really don't go out of our way to hang out we still talk kindly to one another. Just not so much with Hideo anymore," she said, rolling her eyes at the thought of her first boyfriend who tried to get her into having public sex with him constantly. "Best day of my life was breaking up with him."
"I second that," Sakura said and the two of them both shared a laugh. "I'm not sure what I am going to do once summer is gone, and then before you know it, the school year will be gone too."
Tenten looked up at her best friend and frowned. "Let's not think about that too much okay? I don't want to think about what I have to do without you."
"Yeah, I know the feeling," Sakura said, bending down to blow on her toes. She didn't want to think about what would happen after high school was over and Tenten went away to become some medical person saving lives and Sakura would go to college on a Track and Field scholarship.
"I hope this year is fun," Tenten said with a smile crossing her face. "I want it to be filled with memories of my senior year. I don't want to go telling my children that their mother had no life in high school because that is really not what I want at all. I really just want to have fun and share it with my best friend."
"It better be me that you are talking about," Sakura said with a chuckle. But then she started to frown. "Do you think she'll be there?"
"Who?"
"Ino."
"Oh, I don't know, I don't talk to her for you know obvious reasons. But I don't know. I am guessing that she would be, she was on the cheerleading team last year, and she might be this year. She was supposed to have her baby some time ago, like three months or so. I think I heard the lady's at the Food Mart gossiping about how she named her Hana and gave her away to a nice family from somewhere out East. And why are you smiling so much."
She couldn't help but laugh. Tenten was big on being the good girl and Sakura knew that and she really didn't have that big of a problem with her friend being that way at all. "It's just amazing to me that you know all of this."
Tenten sighed. "It's a gift and a curse, sometime my Mom comes home and starts gossiping about all this stuff that I really don't care about but whatever, it's nice to know what goes on around this town. Like how if you write your initials under the bridge and the park that goes over Konoha River, you and your love will be together forever."
"Okay, that is a myth. I tried it with Shikamaru and we are not together."
Tenten shrugged her thin shoulders. "Whatever that is what I heard and I am just telling you what I heard."
"Fine, now come over here and do my nails, I screw up if it do them."
---
"Sakura put it out," Tenten scolded, pulling on her best friend's arm as the duo walked toward the bright field lights and the sound of the pep band playing in the background. "Come on, we're on school grounds and if you get caught this is going to be terrible."
Sakura blew out a puff of smoke, letting it trail behind her. "Oh, we're not even there yet. Chill out Tenten." She laughed half heartedly and raised the cigarette back to her mouth inhaling as she did so.
Tenten tugged on her arm again, trying to get her best friend to stop. "Sakura, come on please, put it out already. We're in the fucking parking lot for God's sake." Tenten's voice was filled with worry as they both approached the ticket booth. Sakura knew that she was worry or stressed, because Tenten never really swore unless she was worried or stress. "Please."
"Fine, fine," Sakura said to her friend, flicking the cigarette out and making sure that she stepped on it. As they made their way to the ticket booth they walked up to a silver haired man. "Kakashi-sensei, in the hoooouse." Sakura said, with a laugh shared on her part and Tenten's part.
The teacher frowned at them slightly. "ID's please," he asked of them, holding out his hand.
"Oh right, of course," Tenten said, digging in her purse to pull out her school ID.
Sakura reached into her back pocket, not bothering to bring more than five dollars and her ID to the Football game. But her pack of cigarettes that she begged to have Tenten put in her purse was besides the point, besides, if Tenten got caught with them both of them would be toast, but Tenten had slipped them away into a zip in pocket and placed her iPod over it.
"Alright you are free to go in," Kakashi said with a forced smile, handing both of them back their ID cards. "Have fun."
Tenten and Sakura both took back their ID's and smiled at him, walking into the gates of the Football stadium. "We have to hurry," Tenten said to her with a smile. "The game is going to start in," she glanced over at the light up game board "three minutes and twenty eight seconds, well about."
"We're fine Tenten," Sakura reassured her best friend. "Just calm down, it's a Football game."
The two walked under the bleachers, making their way to the stands were the high school students were jumping up and down on the bleachers, cheering for the Konoha Pirates before the game had even started. Everyone loved the Konoha high school football spirit, it was fun to go to the games even if you had no idea what was going on like half of the female student body.
Sakura and Tenten climbed the stairs of the bleachers, Tenten looked around, not seeing a space big enough for her and Sakura to squeeze into. "Hey Nobu," she said, tapping the shoulder of one the boys leaning on the railing.
"Tenten, Sakura, hey," he said to her with a smile, pulling Tenten into a hug and then Sakura into one, lifting her off the ground slight, probably because she was fairly smaller than Tenten, by about two sizes and four inches.
"Can you do me a small favor," Tenten asked him with a pleading look on her face, holding up her hand, about an inch separating her thumb and index finger as if to show Nobu how small that her favor was. "So can you?"
Nobu smiled at Tenten. "Sure I can, depending on what it is."
"Get us some seats?"
He nodded his head, trying to the crowded student section. "You," he said, pointing a group of two guys on the second row up. "What year are you,"
"Um sophomores," one of them answered for the two of them, receiving an elbow from the other, who muttered 'dipshit'.
"To the back," he said, pointing to the back of the bleachers. "Maybe when you are seniors you can sit in the front." Nobu said to them, looking at them harshly. He knew as well as anyone that was listening in that they would move for him, Nobu was a bigger guy, taller than most as coming in at about six foot five, and he was about two hundred some pounds. He was a baseball player, they had wanted him to play football but he shot them down claiming that it just wasn't for him.
"Dipshit you shouldn't have said anything," the one who had just recently jabbed his elbow into his friend's side. "Now we have to move," he grumbled as the two of them got up and walked to the top of the bleachers.
He looked back at Tenten with a grin on his face. "There you are Tenten; just ask if you need anything else.
"Thanks Nobu," she replied as she and Sakura made their way to their seats. "I kind of felt bad for them, but not really because we all know that it has happened to-"
Sakura knew that Tenten probably said more, but she couldn't hear her over the roar of the crowd that erupted in their chests.
"TEN… NINE… EIGHT… SEVEN… SIX… FIVE… FOUR… THREE… TWO… ONE… GAMETIME!" The crowd started to jump up and down, cheering loudly as the pep band began to start playing the school song.
"Hello ladies and gentlemen," the voice over the loudspeakers came, "welcome to the Konoha Football Field, home of the Pirates!"
A massive amount of cheers broke out amongst the student body.
"Tonight the Konoha Pirates will be going head to head against the Suna Sharks, in both teams opening season games. Now the starting lineup for the Suna Sharks. At-"
And loud clash of 'boos' and 'you suck' came from the student body from Konoha. Sakura couldn't even hear the announcer; well she was sure that she could have heard him if she really tried listening to him.
"And know for the main event, the starting lineup for the Konoha Pirates. Uchiha Sasuke!"
Sakura swallowed, watching her ex boyfriend run out onto the field, pumping his fists in the air. "I hope he gets crushed," she muttered to herself, knowing that no one was really going to hear her over the roar of the crowd.
The starting lineup continued to be called for Konoha and the kick opened the game, with Suna getting the ball, and it was pretty much back and forth for a long time. Sakura really tried to stay focused but most of the time she would just watch them run around and picture Sasuke getting crushed in her head.
At half time the score looked a little something like 14 Suna and 20 Konoha, a close game that either team could pull forward and win in. So Sakura was a little lacking in the school spirit. She had dressed up, painted her toe nails navy blue and her fingernails gold. She was wearing gold gym shorts that covered her knees and she was wearing a navy blue shirt with gold print letters on it that said. Konoha Pirates, with a pirate right on the front and on the back it read; we'll make you walk the plank! It was Sakura's most worn shirt that she had gotten the summer before her sophomore year.
With about eight minutes in the game left Sakura tapped Tenten's shoulder, her best friend looked at her, smiling slightly. "Yeah?"
"I'm going to get something to eat."
"Alright," she said, and then turned her attention back to the game.
Sakura stepped off of her spot, walking back to the concession stands, where the smell of popcorn and hotdogs filled the air. This was her favorite part about coming to the game by far, the hotdogs and the popcorn, the food in other words. Sakura stood in line, digging a dollar out of her pocket.
"I can help you," an older woman with glasses and dark brown hair said to Sakura with a smile.
Sakura smiled back at her, walking over to her. "Can I just have one hotdog please," she ordered, laying her money flat on the counter.
"Sure dear," she answered to Sakura, taking her dollar and went over to get her a hotdog, and returned in a few seconds. "Here you are dear."
"Thanks," Sakura said, as she walked over to the table with the ketchup and mustard. She set her hotdog down, grabbing the ketchup and drowning her hotdog in it. She loved ketchup, so much that it was dripping outside of her bun. She closed the cap on the ketchup. And picked up her hotdog and turned around quickly.
Before she knew it, her hotdog was squished between her and a tall boy. He stepped back and Sakura looked down, ketchup smeared all over her shirt.
"I'm so sorry," the boy said quickly, grabbing some napkins, and handing them to her. "I really didn't mean to, I can buy you a new hotdog if you like."
Sakura held up her hand as it to silence him. "No," she said shortly, wiping some of the ketchup off of her shirt, which only seemingly made it seem worse and worse. "You don't have to. It's fine, shut like this happens all of the time, you know. Shit happens," she said to him with a chuckle, glancing up at him, not really studying him.
He was tall, dark hair and eyes. He was wearing a Konoha shirt so he must have been an underclassman that Sakura really never gave the time of day to. "I really am sorry though," he said to her, handing her another handful of napkins and taking the ones that she had used that threw them away.
"Like I said it's fine," she said to him with a smile, throwing away the remaining napkins that she had used. "But I'll take your hotdog, plain this time though," she said with a laugh. It was times like these that Sakura was glad that she wasn't a bitch.
The boy looked down and frown. "I took a bite out of it," he said to her, "but if you want it."
"Makes no difference to me," she said honestly, taking the hotdog from him and smiled. "Thanks."
"Yeah, no problem I guess."
She nodded to him, breaking off the piece of his hotdog that he took a bit out of, and tossed it in the garbage can before walking back to the bleachers. When she got there Tenten eyed her up.
"What happened to you?"
---
"Sakura I'm begging you not in my car," Tenten pleaded with her best friend as Sakura dug in her purse, pulling out the pack of cigarettes and her purple lighter. She opened the carton, taking out a cigarette and held it up to her mouth, lighting it. "Do you really have to Sakura, really?"
Sakura rolled down her window before talking a drag of her cigarette. She blew the smoke outside of her window. "I think me quitting for that week made me worse."
"Tell me about it, is that like your ninth one today."
"No it's my forth."
"Wow, big difference."
"Probably is."
"Sakura, you really should quit."
"Not going to happen anytime soon."
"Not even for yourself."
"Not even for myself."
Tenten came to a stop at a red light and looked at her best friend. "You are terrible."
The pink haired girl shook her head. "Nah, just addicted." She tapped the cigarette on the top of her rolled down window before bringing the cigarette back to her mouth.
As the light changed to green Tenten punched the gas. She sighed, looking over her best friend again. "Tell me how you can afford those things again, aren't they like five dollars a punch."
More smoke was blown out the passenger side window. "My father sends money to me every month, about one hundred dollars or so, so I stick about thirty of it into my savings and the rest is for my hobbies, things like that. And when I work with that old lady… her name is Akira I think, she buys my cigarettes when I give her the money. She doesn't ask questions, just what type I want, I tell her and she gets them, in return I let her keep the change."
"By hobbies you mean smoking and drinking right."
"Pretty much what I was getting at."
A frown appeared on Tenten's face. "You really are terrible."
Sakura just shrugged her shoulders, more smoke escaping her lips. "I know I need to break the habit. I just don't want to. I know my lungs will be fucked up someday, but I haven't been smoking that long."
"And how long is that long Sakura?"
The little pink haired girl thought for a moment. "Let me see, I've been smoking about a year and seven months. Give or take a few months off there."
In truth Sakura knew it was the day that she and Sasuke had started dating. She got her to start smoking and drinking. He had wanted her to change for him; he made her what she was today. Sure she hadn't been a virgin when the two of them started dating; she had lost her virginity to Shikamaru about two months before the two broke up. Sasuke and her had been good, or so she thought. But he really just knew how to charm a girl. And Sakura at the time just wanted a boy to be there for her, or at least be there in the physical sense.
"Time to quit is now then. You're going to ruin your lungs." Tenten turned onto their street. "Throw it out we are almost home."
Sakura took one last breath of her cigarette before discarding it out the window of the car. She held the smoke in for a few seconds, before blowing it out the window as Tenten stopped in front of Sakura's driveway.
"Call me if you need anything Sakura. And if you need to stay over because of your mom or something, just let me know," she said, leaning over to give Sakura a hug but then stopped. "I'll give you your good bye hug next time, I don't want to get all of that," she said, pointing to the ketchup on Sakura's shirt "all over me."
She smiled at her best friend, shaking her head slightly. "Maybe it will do me some good, maybe it will get rid of the smell of smoke," she laughed. Sakura opened the car door, taking her lighter and carton of cigarettes in her hand. "See you tomorrow," she said as she shut the door to Tenten's car and started to make her way up her driveway. She reached up, opening the front door and letting herself in. Sakura closed and locked the door behind her, walking to the mudroom where her purse was. She slipped her light and cigarettes inside, zipping up her purse.
"Sakura dear can you come here please," a tired voice called from the kitchen.
"Just a second," she said, grabbing her purse and sliding it over her shoulder as she walked to the kitchen. "I'm here."
Her mother was currently doing dishes in the sink, not a good sign. The only time that her mother did something like that was to keep her mind off of something that was really bothering her. Her mother was a short woman, skinny and pale skin. She had big blue eyes and dark red hair. Sakura's mother wiped her hands off on a towel, turning to face her daughter. She eyed her up and a frown appeared on her face. "Where have you been looking like that?"
Sakura looked down at her shirt that was covered in ketchup. "The game," she told her mother, looking back up at her mother. "Why, where did you think I was."
"You really went to that game? What was the score?"
"Twenty one to twenty eight, we won."
"What time did the game get done?"
"About nine thirty."
"It's seven minutes after ten now. What took you so long?"
"Tenten went to the restroom; of course there was a line. Traffic and just driving home is what took us so long Mom."
"Are you telling me the truth?"
"Why would I lie!" Sakura pleaded with her mother.
The frown on her face deepened. "Well, because you've lied to me so many times before. It's disappointing sometimes, thinking that I raised a daughter as awful as you are to me."
"I'm awful to you," Sakura muttered between gritted teeth. "Try it the other way Mom."
Her mother was quiet for a moment or two, closing her eyes and breathing in slowly, as if to calm herself. "Have you been smoking tonight Sakura?"
"What the hell Mom, where did this come—"
"Answer the God damn question Sakura," she pressed bitingly, opening her eyes to look at her daughter. "Have you."
"Yes. I have."
Her mother's frown seemed to deepen. "You really want to smoke on that cancer stick. Do you really want to ruin your life Sakura?"
"Like you even care about that."
Silence filled the room once more. "Just don't be like your good for nothing father, and where you are going. You're heading down the same path that he was."
"I'd much rather be like him then be a stuck up bitch like you."
Her mother let a sigh, turning back to her dishes and she continued to wash them. "Go stay a Tenten's house tonight," she ordered "I don't want you over if you are going to act like a little girl."
Sakura glared at her mother before turning and heading back to her room. She grabbed a set of clothes, something to sleep in. Sakura took everything that was makeup wise from her bathroom, not forgetting a pair of shoes, high heels and a sundress. She also packed hair products and her curling iron, and even her shampoo, conditioner, body wash, and things like that.
She was just so sick of her mother. Ever since her parents split, Sakura was never really her old self. She started to smoke, drink and date Sasuke. She would lie to her mother, sneak Sasuke in through her window. She even stole money from her mother once. But Sakura thought she was getting her life back together again, maybe she was, she didn't really know if she was piecing her life back together. She hoped that she was.
Sakura packed her bag, and then grabbed her work clothes because she would be working tomorrow. She turned off the lights in her room and walked to the front door, unlocking it and slamming it behind her when she left. She didn't like her mother.
Ever since Sakura was little her mother never thought of Sakura as good enough. Her mother often would mumble to herself 'why couldn't I get the daughter I wanted' or something like 'she is just a mess. And so on. Sakura's father and mother had a falling out, her mother told the court that he was never around and the two just had their differences, she also told the court about his lack of effort to be there in Sakura's life, how he would rather go out and drink then help his daughter with homework, to get all of the control over Sakura until she was eighteen. Which was why Sakura's dad was no longer around.
To be honest, Sakura would much rather have lived with her father than her mother. At least he cared about her.
But sometimes God wasn't always kind.
Author's Note; Long chapter maybe, but the others will be longer. And some of you are like 'where the hell is Kiba at' well then your answer is; somewhere in this chapter. Just not a big part of it. So yeah, don't get all mad and not read afterwards. He will make his big entrance in the third chapter (or fourth). In most books, the love interest doesn't start running in until about the third, fourth or even fifth chapter, so bear with me. Comments are welcome; however I will be making the next chapter, regardless of reviews. But if you see to it that there is something that needs fixing or you just feel like commenting then go right ahead, reviews are more than welcome.