A/N: A commercial for The Bachelor came on the other day and this story popped into my head. This is definitely an AU CRACK FIC. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I am writing. I do not own The Bachelor or POI. The mistakes are my own. ENJOY!

JOHN THE BACHELOR

Reese entered the library with his usual morning haul. Coffee for him and Shaw, a cup of Sencha Green for Finch, French donuts and a doggie danish for bear. "Just in time Mr. Reese we have a new number."

"Can I fill him in Finch, please?" Shaw asked with just a little too much glee for Reese, he had a bad feeling about the situation. "Alright proceed Ms. Shaw."

Shaw taped a picture of a pretty brunette on the glass board. "Meet Rachel Baxter, 30, single, a sales associate for a major pharmaceutical company lives in the city. "I have a question for you Reese."

John took in a deep breath and let it out, wary of what Shaw would ask. "Go ahead Shaw."

"How do you feel about warm weather?" John looked at both Shaw and Finch with a puzzled look?

"Ms. Baxter, Rachel has been picked as one of the bachelorettes to appear on this season of The Bachelor. And guess who the bachelor is going to be?" Shaw could hardly contain herself.

"It's going to be John Rooney, assets." As Shaw fell back in her chair laughing, John turned and glared at Harold.

"What is this Finch?" His voice getting murderously low.

"Mr. Reese it seems Ms. Baxter's appearing on the show The Bachelor and that has put us in a unique position. I've not determined whether she is the victim or perpetrator, but we must get close enough to her to determine that and this seemed the ideal response to the situation."

"But me Finch you know I'm not comfortable in those type of settings. I've never watched It, but the whole thing seems pretty ridiculous to me." If Finch didn't know better he could swear Reese was whining.

"Mr. Reese you're former CIA surely you can handle a room full of women." Finch rolled his eyes and shook his head as he returned to his computer screens.

"Besides I have enlisted the assistance of Ms. Shaw but also I'd like Detective Carter to help with this assignment. I hoped you would ask her," at that Shaw laughed so hard she fell off her chair. "I'm willing to take one for the team only if I can be there when you ask her."

"No!" Both men responded at the same time. "If I have to be on the show the least you could do is come with me when we ask her Harold," as John reluctantly text Carter to meet him and Finch at the diner in twenty.

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"Oh hell no!" As Finch and John laid out the details of the case to her. "Come on Carter where is your sense of adventure?"

"Why would you think it would be adventurous to go on a national television show to try to get a man? Do I look like I have trouble getting a man to you?"

Both men knew when to keep quite. "Look you'll be saving a life, getting a free vacation, not to mention all the pampering and trips the show provides. John was getting just a little exasperated trying to convince Carter and himself.

"No…..I'm a detective I have a reputation to maintain. Get Zoe or Root to do it."

Just then Joss' phone rang it was Shaw being Shaw. "Did they ask you yet? I wanted to be there!" as Carter put the call on speaker. "Seriously?" As she held the phone up eyeing both men so they could hear Shaw.

Finch interjected. "Detective you will not be on the show alone Ms. Shaw will be there with you to help keep an eye on Ms. Baxter." Joss thought of Shaw in a room full of emotional women who is going stop her from shooting one of them if they start getting on her nerves that's all we would need is for her to do it on camera. Carter's resolve starting to wane. "Finch isn't there a better way. Can't you hack in to some system somewhere and keep Baxter from going?"

"Detective hack is such an ugly word, I'm wounded." As he put his hand on his chest in mock distress.

If Finch didn't know better he would swear Detective Carter was whining too. He'd already heard enough of that from Reese.

"Well at least I'll fare better than you, having to choose the future Mrs. Reese out of all those women." Joss teased turning to look at John. Reese ran his hand through his hair stone faced. When Fusco and Shaw met them at the diner they began to solidify their covers.

I'll be on set as a network executive checking up on Chris Harris and the show I'll be monitoring things from one of the bungalows. Detective Fusco will be there also as Mr. Rooney's assistant. John, Shaw and Detective Carter will be on the show." John and Joss couldn't believe they were agreeing to do this but for them it's always about the mission. "Alright Finch only to keep Ms. Baxter from getting hurt or doing something dangerous" ...Fusco and Shaw exchanged a look…. Alright then everyone head home and pack we have to be there in eight hours to check in with the shows staff. We'll take a private jet to LA. Finch rubbed his hands together "Ladies and Gentlemen we are going to Hollywood."

Fusco and Shaw were sitting towards the back of the private jet having a discussion. "How much you wanna bet Reese will pick Carter out of all those women?"

That's a suckers bet you know he will even though he swears they're just friends they shook their heads "The guy needs a serious reality check, if he keeps this up I just might shoot him myself."

"What's got you two in such deep conversation?" John asked as he walked up.

"Oh nothing Fusco and I were just placing a little wager."