The Poison Deep Inside of Me...
"WHAT ON EARTH HAVE YOU DONE!", I whisper screamingly to myself.
"WHAT... on earth have I... done?", I mumble while a sour tear slowly runs down my left cheek.
"What... how... why have we...", I swallow back the lump in my throat, which seems to suffocate me – I can't breathe.
"Damn... it hurts... so much...", with raging agony I quietly accept my tears to flow freely.
"How... to continue if your world's everything disappeared irreversibly?", with conviction I steadily reach forward and take the dark crystal glass from the table infront of me.
"Hm... right, you can't."
My gaze points straight ahead into the flickering flames of the fireplace. A short moment – just a heartbeat – and with one steady motion I lead the glass to my pale lips. The crystal feels soothingly cold on my blood-drained lips. The dark red liquid reaches my lips, my teeth, my tongue. I taste – it's crimson bitter sweet. My heart races but it doesn't matter, the decision was made, the stone hits bottom. With one greedy sip I emptied the glass and its deadly content rushed down my throat. Instantly, brutal warmth spreads through my stomach and my body finally calms down. The sense of dooming fate soothes my sore muscles and for once after IT happened I relax and lay back into the sofa. The fire starts to slowly go down, like the flames of my life... Slowly, the glass falls from my hand and shatters as it hit the black marble floor.
"Draco!"
I know whose voice that is. Way too often have I heard it.
"Draco! What have you done?", my father inquires agitated. It's a little bit like he cares. Funny, in the end perspectives seem to change a lot.
"Draco?! No...", as realisation strikes him, he immediately controls himself. Funny, for a brief second I think I see compassion in his eyes. Something rarely observed in his eyes.
My father, Lucius Malfoy, slowly sits down next to me on the couch, facing the dying fireplace. He lays down his staff and opens the first two buttons of his shirt. After a deep breath and a moment, which feels like an eternity he finally speaks up: "I knew it all along, son..."
In amused shock I have to face him and an unsure grimace creeps along my face: "You... you knew?"
"Of course. I foresaw your pain. The death of Harry Potter, the boy-who-lived, was inevitable to the victory of the Dark Lord. I chose this tough path for you Draco. I never thought about what I demanded from you. I was blind."
"Yes, you were.", slowly I feel the warmth in my stomach go away and instead soothing chillness starts to spread through my limbs. "Dad, I love you and I always struggled as hard as I could to fulfill my duty for our family."
"Indeed son that you did. Even though it tears my heart apart to see you dying like this, next to me, with nothing I can do about it – I am proud of you. Yes, I am."
A slow smile sways over my lips. I start to lose the feeling in my legs as well as my emotions in my heart.
"Draco!", my father slowly looks over to me, "Did you love him?"
Sadly, I look into Lucius' eyes and ever so slowly answer, like a whisper: "Yes. I do." Once again a silent scream of tears runs down my cheeks. My heart feels like eyes. It did so since the Dark Lord killed Harry for all times in the battle of Hogwarts. Right now, I start feeling the venom's effect. My heartbeat slows down and my fingers begin to tingle. My head feels dizzy, my mind is filled with agony.
My father – I nearly see a streak of despair, well guarded behind his aristocratic features, extends his left arm to me and gently tugs me into an embrace.
"It's ok, Draco, my boy. It's ok. I love you, too, and I forgive you..." His voice breaks and I think I hear him sob against my head.
But yet, I'm not that sure as my head fills with dizziness and as I finally let go and let death embrace me, I remember my first kiss with Harry – the bloody boy-who-lived... but died because of my cowardice...
The last thing before I close my eyes forever is the heartbeat of my father... And the awareness that the world had fallen to the darkness – the light had been extinguished. In the world as well as in my life. Finally, I let go and Death takes me on my last journey.