Love Shack, Baby
Written By: Col.UnderRoo (Me; Holly)
Disclaimer: I don't own the Stargate characters, they are are property of MGM. I also have no affiliation with Love Shack by B52.
Summary: Jack arrives at the SGC which also holds an extremely bored Vala. Bad combination...
Pairing: Jack/Sam with some Vala humor thrown in for good luck!
"Daniel!" Vala Mal Doran yelled down the unnervingly quiet corridor of Sub Level 28. Dr. Daniel Jackson sighed, having finally been found by the one person he was desperately trying to avoid all day.
Daniel stopped and waited for Vala to catch up with him in his stationary position. "Yes?" he asked impatiently. "Oh wait, let me guess; you're bored?"
"Are you psychic?" Vala teased with a childish grin displaying her pearly teeth.
"There's nothing I can do about it," Daniel immediately replied, continuing to walk.
Vala skipped after him, not letting him get away that easy. "What are you doing today?" she questioned.
"I am giving a briefing to SG-7 about P2X-763."
"The boring planet with all the rocks...?"
Daniel sighed again and rolled his eyes but humored her momentarily. "Yes, that one, so if you don't mind, I have to be somewhere."
If it wasn't so unlike him, Daniel would have sprinted down the halls to get away from Vala, but he took simple calm steps away from her, Vala watching with a frown upon her face.
She looked down the way Daniel had gone for a few moments before shrugging and replacing the grin on her face. She skipped along the halls some more before coming across a frazzled looking Sam Carter.
"Samantha!"
Sam grimaced as Vala approached. She was growing ever more fond of the alien woman but right now she had enough work to do without finding entertainment for Vala.
"Vala..."
"You don't look very happy to see me," Vala pointed out, hurt etched into her features.
"Oh! No, I'm just tired," Sam lied. Vala's face was once again carefree.
"So what are you doing?"
"Well I have to finish my report from M7R-992 and get it to General Landry before 1500. After that I'm going to check in with R&D, see how things are going on. You can join me, if you want," Sam offered out of politeness.
Vala smiled awkwardly, looking everywhere around her.
"Well... as much fun as that sounds, I'm going to have to pass. I, um, I promised Teal'c that I would... Kel'No'Reem with him. Bye!"
Vala hurried away from Sam, similar to how Daniel had to her. Sam smirked to herself, proud of the reverse psychology that got her rid of Vala. Sam continued in to her lab, opened her laptop and continued with her report.
Vala soon found Cameron Mitchell in the commissary, eating Jell-O. "Coo-Ee! Cameron!" Vala called happily, waving from the door. Cam looked up, saw her, then dropped his head into his wobbly dessert.
Vala didn't take the hint, and skipped over to sit opposite him. "So..."
"You annoy me. Please leave," he cut to the chase, not wasting anytime. Vala appeared clearly downtrodden but she left regardless. Upon leaving, she ran straight into a figure she was not expecting to see.
"General O'Neill," she gasped in surprise. Straightening her top, she smiled brightly. "What brings you to our lovely mountain today, then Sir?"
Jack shot her an awkward look before answering the question. "Well... you know. I was bored up in Washington. Thought I'd come down, see how the kids are. See if they've murdered you yet," Jack winced.
"And what's that supposed to mean?" Vala asked indignantly.
"Oh, nothing, nothing at all," Jack assured her, surprised when she believed him. "Would you happen to know where Carter is?"
"Yes! Colonel Carter is in her lab finishing a report for General Landry."
"Right... well thanks. Bye," Jack finished, uncomfortable being around the overly smiling, annoying woman.
Jack left the entrance to the commissary and continued the other way to Sam's lab, eager to find her. Vala watched him go, with all boredom gone from her mind. She began to think intently. "General O'Neill and our dear Samantha, huh? Interesting..."
Vala once again began skipping, until she arrived at Teal'c's quarters. "Muscles! Quick, open the door!"
It was a few moments before the door opened to reveal a disgruntled looking Teal'c, who obviously didn't appreaciate being interrupted half way though Kel'No'Reeming.
"Are you injured, Vala Mal Doran?"
"Oh, no. I needed to ask you something. Would you happen to know where I would find the stereo in this dreary mountain?"
"Cheyenne Mountain possesses no stereo, Vala Mal Doran. May I inquire as to why you would want this?"
Vala didn't answer him for a moment, simply gazed into space, a thoughtly look on her face. After Teal'c raised an eyebrow at her, she was snapped back to reality.
"Oh. Um, never mind, Muscles. See you later!"
Teal'c watched her skip off down the corridor, turning left at the end heading for the control room. Teal'c inclined his head downwards at her retreating body before returning to his room to continue his Kel'No'Reem. He could worry about that later.
Vala arrived in the bustling control room. All the off-world teams had returned and there were no teams scheduled for a mission until tomorrow. Perfect, Vala thought to herself.
"Excuse me," Vala spoke politely to Walter, twiddling her hair around her fingers. "Could I possibly use your very pretty computer for a moment?"
"Well, you know I'm not really meant to..." Walter trailed away as Vala grinned suggestively at her. "Um... sure. Just don't tell General. Landry."
Vala held a finger up against her lips, signalling her silence. "I wouldn't dream of it," she promised.
Walter stood from his chair, allowing Vala to sit down. Vala immediately connected to the Internet, opening YouTube.
"What are you...?" Walter began, but stopped when Vala held up a finger, telling him to be quiet. She continued working and brought up the base's audio commands, not caring that what she was about to do would probably be counted as illegal in this mountain. Vala activated the base-wide speakers as she'd seen Sam do numerous times for Landry.
Elsewhere, Jack was leaning against Sam's desk in her lab talking with a small grin on his face. He sure had missed these guys.
"... and Daniel threw his at Mitchell, so Mitchell pulled his out and shoved it practically up Daniel's ass," Carter finished with an excited laugh.
Jack raised his eyebrows. "Really? Who knew Mitchell could be so violent with his pencil? Sheesh."
Suddenly they both heard the crackle of the speakers being brought to life. They both heard Vala talking in her most sultry and seductive voice. "This is for our very own Colonel Samantha Carter and General Jack O'Neill..."
She pressed play and set on the speakers, while Jack and Sam glanced at each other out of nervousness and awkwardness.
If you see a faded sign at the side of the road, that says fifteen miles to the... LOOOVE SHACK! Love shack, yeah, yeah...
The End
A/N: Well that's my first Stargate SG-1 fanfic, and I'm looking to do many more, so please review and let me know what I can do to improve. Constructive critisism only please, no flames.
Thanks!