This was prompted to me long time ago on tumblr and I got around to writing it two weeks ago but forgot to post it here. Look for the sequel: Conversations on Watch.
I own nothing and all mistakes are mine.
Rick couldn't sleep, again. For the passed week, it seemed that sleep had completely forgotten all about Rick Grimes. Lifting his sleeping daughter out of the makeshift crib they'd made, Rick held her small form against his and left the room he was sleeping in, walking down the hallway. When he couldn't sleep, Rick would take Judith and walk around. Walking calmed him and he couldn't just leave Judith alone in the room.
Holding his daughter on his side, Rick began his walk down the hallway, full intention of heading downstairs as to not wake anyone with his pacing when he heard it. It was soft but barely contained sobbing. Realizing it was the room that Carol Peletier had taken residence in, Rick stopped and took two steps over to the part way open door, poking his head in. In the darkness, he could just barely make out Carol's shaking form lying on top of the bed.
Instincts kicking in, Rick stepped into the room further and cleared his throat before he spoke. "Carol?" He heard a bit of rustling and sniffling before she responded.
"Rick? Something wrong?" A strained voice escaped from Carol as she leaned over and turned on one of the oil lanterns, cringing as the light broke through the darkness. When she saw that Rick had Judith in his arms, Carol became even more concerned. "Jude okay?"
"Yeah, she's fine. Just didn't want to leave her alone when I took my walk.." Rick said. "I uh.. Heard you.. Thought I'd check on you." Adjusting Judith on his right side, Rick took a seat on the right side of the bed next to Carol.
"Just… Tired." Carol said softly, leaning back against the headboard with Rick. "Thinking.."
"About?"
"Everything. Everyone. Lizzie and Mika… T-Dog… Lori… Andrea… Sophia…" Rick cringed at the break in Carol's voice when she mentioned her daughter. He'd once accused Carol of being cold because she didn't mention her daughter. He could add that on a list of things he regretted saying to Carol. "Beth."
Ever since they'd buried the young blonde, no one had even said her name. It was just too hard for anyone to mention her. Rick's bottom lip trembled as Carol continued. "We were so close to getting her out of there. I thought that maybe if we could have saved her, the things we'd done… could be balanced out." Carol's voice was trembling again. Rick lifted his arm up and slid it across Carol's thin shoulders, tugging her close against him. To Rick's surprise, Carol dropped her head to Rick's shoulder.
Rick opened his mouth to say something, but he didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to comfort Carol in what she was feeling. He barely knew how to comfort himself. Carol adjusted a bit and wrapped her arm around Rick, having seen the tears in his eyes. "I don't know what to say to Maggie." Rick admitted. "Every time I look at her, I just see B—Beth on the ground." He leaned his head against the headboard, feeling angry with himself. Beth was dead and he felt bad for himself.
"Sometimes I think Beth would slap us all if she saw how we just mope around without her." Carol said after a few moments of sitting in silence with Rick. Rick chuckled and looked down at Carol as she looked up at him. "She'd tell us to pick ourselves up, that everything happens for a reason." Rick smiled, he could almost hear Beth's voice instead of Carol's.
"You've got a point there." Rick said, the finger on Carol's shoulder tracing circles on her exposed flesh. Carol shut her eyes, the simple touch soothing. Judith began to stir, softly whimpering as she woke up. "Better take care of this before she wakes up everyone." Rick said as he (reluctantly) pulled away from Carol. He climbed off the bed, gently as to not startle Judith.
"She's got lungs on her." Carol commented, remembering how Sophia used to scream at the top of her lungs when she was a baby.
Rick must have sensed that she was thinking about Sophia, he leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead softly. "Get some rest." He mumbled against her skin before starting to leave the room.
"Rick?" Carol asked. Rick turned his head to look at her, raising an eyebrow at his friend. She opened her mouth to tell him he could come back if he wanted to, once Judith was changed or fed. She opened her mouth to ask him to come back. "Thank you."
Rick nodded, his lips twitching up in a slight smile. "Anytime, Carol." He spoke gently as he moved out into the hallway. He went back to his room, changed and fed Judith, then returned to Carol with his daughter and the makeshift crib.
She'd turned the lantern off and was curled up under the blankets, but Rick could see her smile as he climbed into the bed next to her.