Picture Perfect
A/N: Do you remember that cover picture of Chuck and Sarah where he's got his arms wrapped around her and they're smiling adoringly at the camera? Jem Joven tweeted it yesterday, reminding me that it was taken when they went to Roan Montgomery's condo, given the background and their outfits, and I couldn't help but wonder how and why they'd stop to take that. So I made up a story. I sincerely hope this is not what happened.
This has not been beta'd so all errors are mine. You can't ask a man to work on his birthday.
I don't own Chuck.
"Chuck, what are you doing?"
He jumped at the sound of Sarah's voice, hoping she hadn't noticed, but she was a trained spy and nothing slipped by her. Turning his neck slowly he tried to come up with something clever to say, but when he caught sight of his cover girlfriend, leaning casually against the doorframe, her arms crossed over her chest, only one thought flashed in his brain like a neon sign.
God, she's so pretty.
"Uh…cleaning?" he replied eventually.
Sarah rolled her eyes. "I can see that. The question is: Why?"
"Because the martini glasses were stacked ceiling high?" He didn't know why he phrased his responses as questions. It wasn't like he was committing treason.
"Chuck, it's not your house, so it's not your mess."
Sarah was fixing him her best you-need-to-focus expression, which was both a little scary and sexier than it ought to be, but he could see the amusement dance in her eyes. He loved her eyes.
"I know." He shrugged a shoulder and turned back to the basin before he could ask her when they would finish the second half of their previously interrupted second first date. Grabbing another glass from the tower next to him, he dunked it in the soapy water, giving it a good scrubbing. She'd just say no and he'd been so close to kissing her before Mr. Imposing had felt the need to poop all over his party.
Not the best choice of words, but speaking of party poopers…
"Is Casey having any luck?" he asked.
"The shower stopped five minutes ago. I'm guessing he's helping Agent Montgomery get dressed."
"Ah, the glamorous life of a spy."
Behind him he heard Sarah snicker, but when he shot another glimpse in her direction she'd already slipped back into agent mode, which probably had something to do with the heavy footsteps descending the stairs. Chuck whipped the dishrag off his shoulder, dried his hands and hung it over the back of a kitchen chair before following Sarah out into the living room. The rest of the dishes would have to wait for the cleaning crew. He wondered briefly it that would be the same team responsible for clearing the blood, bodies and debris they sometimes left behind after a mission.
Probably not.
"Where's Agent Montgomery?" Sarah asked.
"Sleeping it off," Casey replied absentmindedly, his eyes fixed on the object in his hands. "The cold shower didn't work."
"How long is that gonna take? The mission is tonight, which doesn't leave us with a lot of time to prepare," Chuck said.
"Keep your panties on, Bartowski." Casey didn't bother looking up from the item he was holding around, stroking along the black finishing in a soft caress. "All you have to do is kiss a girl. And who knows? You might even like it."
"Will you the two of you give it a rest?" Sarah interjected.
Casey ignored her. "Do you know what this is, Bartowski?"
"A camera? Or maybe a rhetorical question?"
"This," Casey said, "is the Canon EOS one D Mk four. Sixteen point one mega pixel APS-H CMOS sensor. Dual DIGIC four processors which offer ten frames per second for up to 121 JPEGs. A mind-twistingly high sensitivity up to ISO 102,400. Full HD movie capture with manual control. Three inch clear view two LCD is complete with live view. A 45-point AF system with 39 cross-type sensors. This is not just a camera, Bartowski, it's the Crown Vic of cameras."
Chuck stared at him slack jawed, then turned to Sarah who'd expressed her surprise by raising two perfectly sculpted eyebrows.
"He's scaring me," Chuck whispered under his breath.
"Maybe he's been at the Buy More too long," she replied in the same tone.
"You know what you guys need?" Casey asked, finally able to tear his eyes away from the digital marvel. "You need some decent cover couple photos."
"We have cover couple photos," Chuck said.
"That photo-shop crap the C.I.A. threw together?"
"Hey!" Chuck and Sarah spoke over each other.
"We don't have time for this, Casey," Sarah said. "We have a mission to prepare for."
"And an instructor who's out cold," he replied. "What else are we gonna do while we wait? The dishes?"
Chuck could feel his ears starting to burn when Sarah gave him a sideways glance, failing to suppress her smirk.
"I'm not really dressed for pictures," Chuck said. "I'm sure my hair's a mess and – "
"Your shirt matches your blush," Casey replied. "Don't worry, Bartowski, it's not my first time. I'm sure I can make you look good…ish."
"Gee, thanks, but I think I'll pass, if it's all the same to you."
"Bartowski." Casey held up the camera in one hand. "I can shoot you with this – " Then he pulled his Glock from his shoulder holster with the other, aiming it at Chuck's chest. "Or I can shoot you with this."
"Picture time it is," Chuck said, barely containing a nervous laugh.
"Hug Walker from behind."
Chuck didn't have much choice. As it turned out, Casey wielding a camera was a lot scarier than Casey wielding a semi-automatic.
"That's it," Casey spoke, clicking away. "Cross your arms under her breasts. Yes, I said breasts, Bartowski, put your eyes back in your skull. Better. Now lean your head into hers. Lean, Bartowski, not head butt."
"I am leaning."
"No talking. Smile. No, not like I'm about to eat you. Pretend Walker is crawling towards you and you can see down her – "
"Casey!" Sarah had been fairly quiet through the whole ordeal, only speaking up when things threatened to get out of hand.
"Fine," Casey said. "Smell her hair. How does that make you feel?"
Sarah made a little growling noise in the back of her throat and Chuck figured was safer to ignore that particular instruction. It was difficult though, given their proximity. But he had to admit, holding Sarah and feeling her warm hands on his arms made this little side mission completely worth it.
"There's that goofy grin I was after."
"It's not goofy."
"Hush, Bartowski."
"Take the picture already," Sarah said.
Chuck wanted to point out that Casey had taken probably six dozen photos by now, but then decided against it. He didn't get the chance often to be this close to Sarah and he wanted to enjoy it for just a moment longer.
"Make love to the camera, Bartowski."
"What? No!"
Casey chuckled and finally separated his eye from the viewfinder. He popped the memory card out and slipped it into his inside pocket. Then his face morphed back into his trademark I-had-lemons-for-lunch expression before he turned on his heel and marched back into the condo.
"Is it me," Chuck asked, "or was that completely weird?"
"Completely."
The conversation died and Chuck couldn't help but notice that Sarah had yet to step out of his embrace.