Title: Five Pop Culture References Prowl Didn't Get (or How Bluestreak Finally Won a Bet)

Summary: Jazz quotes. Prowl tries not to fritz. Everyone else is amused.

Disclaimer: I don't own Transformers, RENT, Gundam Wing, Star Trek: The Next Generation, End of the World, or The Princess Bride.

Authors Notes: So, last week, I spent most of my time high out of my mind off of various pain killers (falling down two flights of stairs? Not so fun, I don't recommend it) and Ambien. Apparently, I am fairly prolific when in an altered state of mind. I quite honestly don't remember writing most of these and only stumbled onto them when looking for something completely unrelated. Welcome to Transformers on drug cocktails! I don't really know what the time line is on this other than it is G1. I don't think the animation I reference was out yet, but hey, I was high. Let's pretend. :)

i.

You're working together on some reports in the common room and you ask, very politely you think, for Jazz to pass you an energon cube.

He looks at you with a raised optic ridge and says, "Not in MY backyard, utensils. Go back to China," and continues working. Bumblebee, not looking up from his game of cards with Wheeljack and Bluestreak, pipes in with a "Bee dee bong" and you are left wanting for both energon and comprehension.

ii.

You both are almost out of enemy territory when a Decepticon spots you. Before you can even think about doing anything about it, Jazz has taken aim and fired.

"Nice reaction time," you say, and he smirks and replies, "Those who have laid eyes on an Autobot shall not live to tell about it." You think you recognize his words, but only shake your head and motion forward because you know if you think about it for too long your battle computer will fritz.

iii.

"Hey, Prowl, got two tickets to th' orchestra's outdoor performance for next Friday night," Jazz's voice says, and you jerk your gaze up to see him poking his head into your office. You cock your head to the side consideringly.

"Well, I don't know..." you start, wanting to attend but thinking of your work load.

Jazz waves two pieces of paper in front of his face. "Ya know ya wanna!" he sings and has you fighting a smile.

"Well, yes, but regardless--" but Jazz interrupts you.

"Resistance is futile," he says in a monotone voice.

You furrow your optic ridges in confusion. "What does that--"

You bring a hand up to your head and try to decipher what just happened but you can't really think clearly because this haze in your CPU that's been steadily growing the past few days just got a little thicker and Jazz is still staring at you and it's all you can do to nod.

Jazz grins. "Great! We're gonna have a blast." He waves before disappearing. "See ya later, Prowl!"

For some strange reason the phrase "WTF mates" bounces around your increasingly cluttered mind. You think maybe you need a vacation.

iv.

The boulder you are hiding behind provides shelter from the relentless barrage of hits from Soundwave. Jazz looks over at you and says, "I'll cover you," but there is something in the way he says it that makes you take note.

After the battle is over and you are getting various dents pounded out of you by Ratchet, you take the time to think back over the past few days.

You think you finally might get it.

v.

You have done your fact checking, an act which has lessened significantly the thick haze of confusion that has developed in your CPU the past week. In one of the now clear sections you have cultivated a simple yet hopefully effective plan and are only waiting for the proper opportunity.

It comes as you are walking to his quarters when you ask him what he wants to do.

"Well, we haven't played Euchre in a while. How 'bout we start with that an' go from there?"

You say, "As you wish," and there's a funny little thing around the corners of your lips that could be called a genuine smile only because your optics do most of the work for you.

Jazz stops abruptly and turns his head to look at you, his mouth slightly open in shock. His visor glows a little brighter and he smiles the smile you have finally figured out is just for you.

vii.

"I told you it would work!" Bluestreak exclaims with his doorwings high and face glowing in triumph as he counts his winnings. "No one ever believes me, no one ever takes my suggestions, but Jazz did, and it worked!"

"Yeah, yeah," Sideswipe grumbles good naturedly and hands over two cubes of his finest high grade.