Written because I'm stressed and angry about chapter 57. No spoilers though. Another NightClan one word prompt for 'heartbeat.'
…
Humanity's Strongest and Humanity's Hope; they were nothing more than the titles, those two words. They were objects. Things to be molded and used. Tools. And broken and battered ones at that, with dents, scratches and scars. Maybe even a few cracks. But they never rusted and never dulled. They weren't allowed to.
Levi was older and he knew. He knew what his job was, he knew that he was just a sword, a weapon. When people spoke about the things he could do, what and who he would sacrifice for the cause, it didn't bother him. He knew it was better him than them, even if they didn't understand. And when he looked at Eren, he knew what the fifteen year old brat was.
Eren didn't know yet. He was foolish and loud and brash. He was young. He wanted. He wanted his friends to be safe, he wanted humanity to be free, he wanted to see the ocean. A tool, but a flawed one. And not in a bad way either. But Eren looked Levi in those cold, dark eyes he had and saw something. What it was, he didn't know, like he didn't know so many things. He didn't know he was seeing himself at that age, if the war didn't end. He was seeing what he already was, what was inside him.
Levi knew and Eren didn't, not really, but it didn't matter in the end. They were the same, no matter how different they looked, acted or even what their ideals were. No matter what they knew, they were the same.
People who are the same somewhere inside are always drawn together because no one else can understand them as perfectly as the other can. It was dark the first time those symbolic objects shared a kiss, but it was right because they both felt electricity. It was a simple brush of lips against lips and that was it. It was all that was needed. After, they looked each other in the eyes and then just walked away.
More kisses were shared, mostly in the dark. Not because they felt the need to hide, but because they felt that it was right. Maybe comfortable, even. Although neither were really sure about that, because Eren had no idea what he was doing and Levi had never had actual feelings attached to physical pleasure, so, really, he had no idea what he was doing either.
Hands wandered and caressed, all the while making one feel what he had thought he couldn't and one feel what he hope he could. And both were… well, glad. Happy was too much. They couldn't really be happy. But they were glad and they felt warm inside, which was something one had to relearn and the other had to cling onto. They clung to each other and perhaps they were almost happy. Perhaps.
They never hid. They let hands and eyes linger, fingers brush lightly across shoulders and cheeks and arms wrap around waists. They knew they should probably be more careful but they couldn't really bring themselves to care if anyone found out. After all, neither of them were disposable, not yet.
Everyone knew. Some frowned and scowled at them, wrinkling and turning up their noses. Other supported them in their own fashions and others had nothing to say at all, not if the little tools were still doing their job. Neither tool cared. They knew what was happening to them, because they weren't stupid. They moved together on the sheets on the bed and then they tangled together under them, pressed together because he was Humanity's Strongest and he was Humanity's Hope and sometimes they just liked listening to each other's heartbeat.
Eren wanted to make sure his... Captain was still there, and that, as long as he could hear that sound, everything was okay. He felt more alive.
Levi wanted to know if his monster was still his. That he wasn't broken, not yet, not fully. When he heard that thumping, he felt like he had a reason to be alive.
End