After seeing this picture (the one on my home page CLICK MY NAME!!) I got inspired by nonsense and stupidity.
SO BE AWARE that this is stupid, full of nonsense and that Hitsugaya is not his prideful self, he's kinda like Ichigo/Renji with part of the lil guy we know and love. Plus half of it might not even make sense and there's like no plot.
READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!
I don't own Bleach
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Running footsteps were heard as three figures ran through a long hallway. The hallway was plain, there was nothing in it, just a hallway. As the three approached you can clearly make out who each person was, even if the flew by you, like they are going to right now. A flash of red, orange, and white can be seen.
Ichigo, Renji, and Hitsugaya were all running, behind them a large metal ball threatening to squish them like little bugs, in Hitsugaya's case, like a cell, or just something smaller then a bug.
"WHY THE HELL DID YOU TOUCH THAT ANYWAY!?" Hitsugaya yelled.
"I THOUGHT IT WOULD GET US OUT!!" Ichigo yelled back.
"WHY AM I EVEN HERE?!" Renji shouted to no one in particular.
You, Renji wasn't even suppose to be there. Hitsugaya and Ichigo wanted training so they went to Urahara and asked for some training, of course they expected something crazy, but never like this. Renji was just there at the wrong time and Ichigo pulled him into the portal out of instinct, after Urahara pushed them in. Also, they didn't have their swords, Urahara said they wouldn't need them and Renji just didn't have his on at the time.
So here they were in gwad knows where, running for their lives for 10 minutes.
They finally reached an opening in the hall where they were finally able to get out of the way and allow the ball to go on without them. They stood there panting.
"Now what?" Renji asked and as if on cue, the ground lifted up and created 2 different ways, one going to the left and the other going to the right.
"Shit," the three said together. Hitsugaya sighed.
"You guys stay here, I'm going to check down that way," he said and pointed to the left. As he walked on I seemed there was a dead end, he cursed under his breath and turned around to go back. As he turned he felt the ground under him lower a bit. He turned around and saw spikes coming from both sides of the wall.
Ichigo and Renji were sitting down when they suddenly heard fast approaching foot steps. Hitsugaya was running at high speed.
"Oi, Toshiro wh-" Ichigo didn't even need to finish when he saw the spikes. Him and Renji bolted right up and ran. Hitsugaya caught right up to them.
"WHAT DID YOU DO!?" Ichigo yelled.
"I DIDN'T SET IT OF INTENTIONALLY LIKE YOU DID!!"
The spikes were not far behind. Just as they reached the end of the hall, a ripping sound was heard. Free from the spikes Ichigo and Renji smiled at each other, but when they turned around they were meet with a very unhappy scowl. They couldn't help but laugh at the sight.
Hitsugaya's entire back half of his robe was pierced with the spike. He also hung about a foot above the ground.
"How'd you get above the ground?" Renji asked still laughing a little.
"Shut up you two! It's a good thing I'm alive to kick your ass'!" Hitsugaya said as he flailed around, causing them to laugh more.
"Maybe we should leave him if he's gonna kick are ass'." Ichigo whispered to Renji.
"Yea, we can take anything he has, too."
"Maybe he has some food."
"Yea."
"I CAN HEAR YOU!! And if its food you want, get me down I might give you some."
"OK!"
Renji and Ichigo each grabbed one of Hitsugaya's arms.
"O-oi what are you doing?" Hitsugaya asked.
"1."
"Eh?"
"2."
"Wait, a minute, don't just-"
"3!!" Ichigo and Renji used all their strength and pulled Hitsugaya. A loud ripping sound echoed though the empty place.
"-pull me..." Hitsugaya finished. He stood there, the whole top of his robe ripped off, leaving his chest and back bare.
"Ok, where's the food?" Ichigo asked. Hitsugaya sighed and pointed his finger to an apple tree not that far away.
"WHAT HELL' UP WITH THAT?!" Renji shouted.
Hitsugaya kicked both of them where it hurts. (if ya know what I mean /wink/)
"YOU BASTARDS! NOW I HAVE NO TOP THANKS TO YOU FOOLS!" he yelled at them as the squirmed on the ground in pain. He headed to the strange/random apple tree.
When the "three musketeers" got up to the tree they all sweat dropped. They trees trunk was as slick as Ikkaku's bald head, so there was no way of climbing it, and it was tall...very tall.
"Now what?" Renji asked.
"You have a habit of saying that don't you?" Ichigo replied.
"Guess we have to climb on top of each other." Hitsugaya said.
So, the three all got on the others shoulders, Renji at the bottom, Ichigo in the middle, and of course, Hitsugaya at the top. If anyone saw this, people would think they belonged in a home. BUT DUE TO ALL THEIR EFFORT TO REACH THE WAS ONLY ONE PROBELM!! AND THAT WAS!! Hitsugaya couldn't reach the apple. He was able to touch it, but couldn't grab it.
"HURRY UP YOU TWO!!"
"COME ON STRETCH, TOSHIRO!
"I AM, SHUT UP!!" Hitsugaya yelled as he stepped on Ichigo's face, causing them to lose balance and fall.
"NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID!" Renji and Ichigo shouted at the little one.
"I'M SICK OF THIS!!" Hitsugaya shouted and kicked the tree. He clutched his foot in pain. About 5 seconds later the shouts of Ichigo and Renji were gone, he turned around and saw them pasted out. A few apples had fallen and knocked them unconscious.
"Well, that was easy," he said as he picked an apple up and started eating. As he watched the two lunatics sleep he got an idea.
When Ichigo and Renji both woke up the first thing they noticed was they were topless. Why? They didn't have a clue.
"WHAT THE HELL!!" Ichigo screamed.
"Must you always yell?"
Ichigo looked down and noticed Hitsugaya sitting on the ground with a fire going. How the hell did a fire get...wait...is that black clothe burn?
"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU BURNING ARE ROBES!!" They shouted.
"It's for tearing mine off before. I was gonna where them but when I pulled them off you guys they were all sweating and disgusting. I didn't feel like having your body fluids on me, that's just gross."
Ichigo and Renji just stared, sighed, and took a seat next to the fire. Three boys now sat topless by a fire using shinigami robes to stay alight. Lets hope they don't lose their bottoms...
"Why do we even need a fire? And where did you get that stick and those rocks?" Ichigo asked.
"These sticks fell from the tree, and those rocks were under the tree." Hitsugaya said as he lifted a burning apple to check to see if it was cooked. Seeing it was ready to eat, he nudged it towards Renji.
"What?"
"Here, I don't want it."
"Why?" Renji asked, but he didn't answer and just nudged more
"Fine, fine," he said as he took the apple and bite into it.
"You think I would eat something from this sweaty fire?" Hitsugaya said a moment later. Renji spit out the apple immediately after hearing that.
"YOU LITTLE ASS!" Renji yelled as he wiped his tongue.
After that little event they all feel asleep.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
When they awoke the weren't in the place they fell asleep.
They were now in a cubicle room, with no door.
"I'm gonna kill Urahara when we get out," Hitsugaya said as he sat up and walked around the room. After ten minutes of hearing Ichigo and Renji snore, he decided to wake them up, by stepping on their stomachs really hard.
After some more yelling at each other, a beeping noise was heard. They all turned around and saw words appear.
WARNING: LASERS WILL APPEAR IN 5...
"Lasers?" -Ichigo.
4...
"Will appear?" -Renji.
3...
"In this room?" -Hitsugaya
2...
Little green lights appeared on the walls.
1...
"OH SHIT!"-All.
0...
Buzzzzzzzzzzz
Lasers appeared from almost every corner of the room, luckily, they were able to go in weird positions to dodge.
Ichigo was flat against the wall, his head bent to the right and his leg sticking out in front of him.
Hitsugaya was stuck on all fours, his little ass in the air.
And Renji, well, Renji was balancing on one foot, positioned like a ballerina.
"I don't know how long I can stay like this." Renji said.
"Renji, don't," Ichigo begged.
"I can't..."
"Renji! It's an order you stay like that!" Hitsugaya said.
"Like hell!" Renji shouted. "Can't..." Renji said as he stood up, allowing the lasers to touch him.
They all closed their eyes. Waiting for something.
Nothing happened.
"Hm, guess it wasn't anything at all." Renji said.
Beep beep beep.
"Huh?"
Before anyone could say anything, they were all electrocuted.
And hell it hurt if they were all screaming.
When they awoke again they were in Urahara's training ground.
"Hullo!" a cheery Urahara greeted the three forms that walked over to him. "How was it?"
When he looked more carefully, he could see they were actually running towards him with murderous intent.
So he got up and ran.
And Renji, Ichigo, and Hitsugaya just chased him.
When they caught him they did unimaginable things to him, so it was censored.
THEY THEN ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!
THE END!
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YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
No I was not on drugs when I wrote this.
It was a momment...IM SURE YOU ALL GET THOSE MOMMENTS TO WRITE NOTHING BUT STUPIDITY!
Flames are gladly welcomed and will be used to cook apples over an un-sweaty fire .
