Selfless – selfish
– I do not own Percy Jackson. All rights belong to Rick Riordan. –
They called him selfless, the most selfless person they had ever known. Again and again, without fail, throughout all the years he had known them. And each time he would listen patiently, with a warm smile, that sardonic twitch of his lips going unnoticed.
They called him selfless because he put his life on the line, time and time again. They called him selfless, because he was willing to sacrifice anything for his friends. They called him selfless, because he kept them alive at all costs. They called him selfless, because he always looked out for others first and himself second. They knew he was selfless.
He knew they were wrong.
He was selfish when he put his life on the line. Every time someone he cared for died, he lost his will to live. Not wanting to go on without his friend, he would throw himself into the fray, practically trying to get himself killed. Even though he knew how much his death would hurt them, that it would destroy them, he still foolishly risked his life.
He was selfish when he was willing to sacrifice anything for his friends, Athena had at least gotten that part about him right. He would let innocents die, would destroy the whole world single handedly to keep them alive, even as they begged him to stop, to just give them up, to sacrifice them so everyone else could live. Yes, he would sacrifice anything for his friends, but he would never sacrifice them.
He was selfish when he kept them alive at all costs. When death would be kinder, a blessing, an escape, he still kept them alive. They would ask for death, assure him it was all they wanted, but he could not bear to let them go.
He was selfish when he looked out for others first and himself second. He looked out for their lives, not their happiness. Because, selfishly, he would keep them living for his own happiness, whether they wanted to or not.
Yes, they may believe him selfless, but he knew the truth: Perseus Jackson was the most selfish of them all.