2nd Series 04/10 - Reminders

by InfamousB

Another step is taken in recovering from past events.

Reminders
by: Laura Boeff

He hated hospitals.
With a passion.
The way they smelled. The way they sounded. There were always people moving, talking, pages being sent and the clattering of carts. There was never silence or peace in a hospital. Even in the dead of night. Hospitals were places of pain. They existed only to deal with the suffering of mankind. Just the general overall feel was enough to make him want to make a break neck run for the door.
Plane and simple; he just hated hospitals! Now more so then ever.
Especially now.
Today Cosmo was going to have the reconstructive surgery. The facial wound running over the teen's left cheek, cutting past his eye and through his brow was just barely healed. Still angry red. A vibrant reminder of what had happened. Too vibrant. Ace winced at the brief memory. He still felt guilty, would feel guilty the rest of his life. Though his friend did not hold him at fault, Ace did. After all, he had introduced Cosmo to the office door window head first. A soft shudder went through him and he tried to lock down on these dark emotions. To keep them from disturbing the teen further. Technically, Cosmo was still a teen, though he had recently just celebrated his eighteenth birthday. Ace tried to distract himself with that fact and the quiet pride Cosmo now wore at being his official and legal partner. He tried to distract himself, but it was hard. Very hard. Especially here.
"It's okay, Ace."
He was shaken from his moody thoughts to look down with a blink. A sardonic smile crinkled his lips. So much for hiding his feelings.
The were in the out-patient wing of the Merrick Clinic. A private medical facility. Cosmo was currently draped out on an operating table, slightly inclined. He was trying to relax against the stiff mattress, but not quit succeeding. A thin monitoring wire ran to his left wrist, another snaking beneath the throat of his shirt, leaving a small bump under the fabric over his heart. The soft beep of the EKG in the background being the only sound in the small, neat little surgical booth. His right arm was now graced with a IV needle, a small of piece tape keeping the sharp intrusion in place. A saline drip rested by the bed, readying the young man's system for the surgery to come. It was minor surgery, one the doctor assured them would go smoothly, but any surgery, no matter how minor, always had risks.
Risks Cosmo was having to take because of him. Ace jumped as fingers lightly brushed against the back of his hand. Cosmo's hand rested briefly on his and somewhat guiltily he realized he was clutching at the surgical table.
"Ace." There was exasperation this time in the young man's voice. Ace looked down into a pair of concerned, gray eyes that were frowning up at him. He tried to look straight into the pale gaze and once again failed. Almost of their own will, his eyes slid along the length of the jagged disfigurement, over every course edge and rivulet. Cosmo let out a frustrated breath.
"It'll be fine, bud! No big deal," he stated, trying to sound blasé. Ace sighed, hearing the nervous tremor buried beneath the unconcerned words. He drew in a slow breath and tried to smile.
"I know, Cosmo," he said softly. "It's just..."

The words drifted and Cosmo shook his head, frowning as the gravity defying red hair flopped forward. He was currently sans his headband glasses and the rogue locks kept falling into his face. Lifting his hand, careful of the monitor wire, he shoved the hair away again, not for the first time. Man, he wanted his glasses back. Useless wish. They couldn't do the reconstruction with the things on certainly.
"Ace, it's over, okay," he sighed, not for the first time. He was nervous, certainly, but actually happy as well. Well, maybe not happy, but relived. It tore at his heart the fleeting guilt and pain that would still cross Ace's face every time he looked at his partner and the brutal scar. Occasionally the emotions coming so strong that Cosmo felt the distress when confronted with the physical reminder of Ace's actions. Ace was doing better, finally coming to grips, but the process of healing was slow, painful. Maybe now it would be better. For all of them. He hated being a source of Ace's anguish.
"And don't shield me out," he added tersely. Ace had tried this morning, when his anxiety worsened in lue of the upcoming surgery. It'd taken some heated words and Cosmo's darkest glare to get him to drop it, but at last, Ace relented unhappily. He hated when Ace did that! Even if it was only to try and protect him from the older man's negative emotions. Still, It hurt in a way all it's own. Not a physical pain, more mental. Like losing something precious. A part of you.
"Cosmo," Ace protested. Cosmo glared at him.
"Don't," Cosmo shot back defiantly. "You suck at shielding anyway, Ace."
Well, maybe not sucked, but he definitely wasn't too good. Ace wasn't the empath after all, so he was kind of flying blind.
"I'll shield when I need to shield, okay, Ace?" he snorted, then sighed and smiled slightly.
"Man, I think your more nervous than me," Cosmo teased playfully, shaking his head and glaring as more hair fell down. Man...
Ace actually laughed and kindly pushed the tresses away again.
"You know, a hair cut wouldn't be the worst thing in the world," he said lightly.
Cosmo let out a horrified gasp.
"Never!" he protested over-dramatically, letting his eyes roll.
"This, man, is art," he added, jerking his gaze up to his hairline. Ace just chuckled and Cosmo beamed. Ace laughed so little these days. Any chance he got to lighten the magician's mood he took.
The soft chuckle died and Ace took a deep breath looking at his partner. He reached out tentatively and let his finger trace along the freshly healed wound. Cosmo didn't pull back, even though his touch stung slightly. The wound was just barely healed. Just enough to allow the cosmetic surgery to take place.
"Are you okay?" Ace asked at last. Cosmo shrugged.
"Little nervous," he admitted. Actually, he was a lot nervous. After all, someone was going to be cutting into his face in a few minutes. But Ace didn't need to hear that. Not in the least. He looked around with an unimpressed snort.
"White. You'd think they could come up with better color than white."
"Maybe they think everyone's color blind," Ace mused. Cosmo laughed.
"I'd settle for blind. Did you see the nurse at registration?" Cosmo shivered. "Not pleasant."

Ace laughed again and shook his head. Only Cosmo.
"Well, don't worry, you won't be staying," he assured. This was an out-patient procedure after all. Ace was happy for it. Bad enough Cosmo had to be here. At least he could recover in the comfort of their home.
"Saving grace," Cosmo still chuckled, pleased to see Ace's mood lighting. The door opening drew both men's attention to the gentleman who'd entered.
Dr. Williams. Cosmo's surgeon. A competent man in his late thirties with a pleasant, round face and bright green eyes. They knew the man and his skill well. He'd been the doctor responsible for undoing the work of the infamous Dr. Martin for Ace.
"Hello, gentleman," Williams said pleasantly, coming along-side the table.
"How's the patient?"
"If you think I'm going to say thrilled to be here, I'm going to disappoint you, bud," Cosmo said lightly as the doctor jotted down a note. Williams laughed.
"Well, at least you honest," he admitted, as the door opened again, this time a nurse entering. Ace sighed as Cosmo checked out the young woman. She was perhaps twenty five and somewhat tall, with a plain, yet kindly face.
"This is Joan, she'll be assisting," Dr. Williams introduced politely.
"Hello," Joan paused long enough to say, with a small smile, before returning to her work. She was currently prepping the surgical tools on a small counter against the far wall. Briefly, Ace looked at the instruments and shivered. Soon these tools would have his partner's blood on them. It made him faintly ill.
"Ace?"
He pulled his attention back to Cosmo who was frowning up at him. From his position the teen couldn't see the nurse's work and Ace was distantly glad for it. He patted his friend's hand.
"I'll be okay," he assured.
Cosmo looked at him, frowning slightly, then sighed. "So will I, Ace," he returned softly, meaning it.
"Sure he will, Mr. Cooper. He's in good hands," Williams added not missing the distress shining in the magician's face. Everyone in this hospital knew just how close these two were. Dr. Beckett had asked him to be extra sensitive to the issue. He'd been slightly annoyed at the request. He always tried to be sensitive to his patients, but now, he understood better her concern.
"Any last minute questions?" he asked of his patient.
Cosmo shrugged, brows lifting briefly. "No. You, Ace?" he asked, looking up to his partner. Ace slowly shook his head. No, he didn't have any question, just worries, and the doctor couldn't take care of those.
"No, no questions," he said at last. Dr. Williams nodded.
"Okay then," he stated, patting Cosmo on the shoulder. "Just try to relax, despite all the rumors to the contrary, I do know what I'm doing."
Cosmo laughed and rolled his eyes.
"Man, you're as bad as Ace," he chuckled. Ace tried to give Cosmo a mock glare, but his partner grinned at him all the same.
"I try," Williams chortled, moving to the IV drip. Silently, Joan came up and handed him a hypodermic which he slid into the feed line.
Cosmo gulped as he watched the plunger drop, the clear liquid blending with the saline. A hand rested on his shoulder, offering mute comfort and he took it, fear tickling his gut.
"It'll be okay, Cosmo," Ace said softly, smiling gently down at him. He clutched briefly at his friend's hand, trying to grin back, but his heart wasn't in it.
"I know," he said softly.
Dr. Williams came back to his bedside, looking down sympathetically.
"You'll get an odd taste in the back of your throat. That's not unusual. Now I want you to count backwards from ten."
Cosmo rolled his eyes at the silly request.
"Humor me."
Another eye roll, but Cosmo relented.
"10, 9, 8... 7...."
Ace waited as the young man's voice caught, thickened, then died out in a whisper. Cosmo's eyes rolled back, pupils dilating as the lids fluttered, then dropped. His body went limp against the mattress, head lolling to the side, breathing soft and shallow. Fear clutched at Ace briefly at the startling transition. He shoved it away. Cosmo was okay. Was going to be okay.
"Good. The anesthesia took well," the doctor announced cheerfully, making a small adjustment to the EKG. He turned and smiled kindly to Ace.
"I'll take good care of him, Mr. Cooper. Please, don't worry," Williams promised gently as Joan brought the instruments over. Ace nodded slightly and let his fingers brush some stray hair from his young friend's face, eyes resting briefly on the scar, hopefully for the last time.
"I know you will," he offered softly, looking up at the man. "Thank you."
Dr. Williams nodded as Ace forced himself away from the bed and to the door. With a last, quick look and a silent prayer he slipped out to wait.

Ace stalked down the bustling hall, cape moving in a whisper around him. Some people looked up. Some recognizing him, some just taking in his unique dress. Ace didn't notice any of it as he made his way to the small waiting room-- who's location he was all to familiar with.
It was a pleasant enough place; for a hospital. Brightly lit and decorated with live plants, with an atrium looking over a small English garden. But, despite the cheerful setting, there was no hiding the purpose of this room. Briefly, Ace looked at his fellow occupants with discreet curiosity.
It was depressing. His eyes moved from face to face. Everyone, so somber, so... worried. He drew in a heavy breath.
So like him.
He bypassed the line of chairs and went straight for a window, all but pressing himself up against the glass. The garden was actually lovely. A small, but well cared for affair. Delicate and in fresh bloom in the late spring. A time of growth and renewal.
Ace's heart clenched.
And instead of being out, enjoying the sun and the warmth, his best friend was stuck here. Here. Because of him.
Ace drew in a deep breath and let it out again. He couldn't do that! He couldn't dwell. It would change nothing-- help nothing. But still....
From the depths of his cape Ace drew out Cosmo's glasses, letting his thumb run lightly over the smooth V.R. lens. They were the young man's pride and joy. He almost never, ever went without the eyeware. Even fancy dress parties. Ace had assured him he would take good care of them during the surgery, smiling slightly at the fleeting image of Cosmo's concern as he handed them over. That was not the only reason he accepted responsibility for their protection. It was for his own guilty reassurance he took them. Guarding them when he had to leave his partner to the care of others. Trusting those others to tend to him.
Hoping that it would be over soon. For the better.
Ace had been overjoyed when Cosmo had approached him on the subject of the plastic surgery. He had not brought it up. Felt he had no right to, no matter how much he wanted it. It was Cosmo's choice, not his. No matter how much Ace's heart clenched at the sight of the destruction he had wrought.
Not that Cosmo didn't undoubtedly pick up on those emotions. Ever since the teen had accepted his magic, his empathic abilities had grown and expanded to an amazing degree. Thankfully, so was had his shielding capabilities. Especially during more awkward moments.
Yes. Undoubtedly Cosmo had felt his despair and undoubtedly that had helped bring on the request. Though, wanting to return his looks back to their original rakishness also probably had something to do with it. Cosmo wasn't vain, but he was self conscious. What young man wouldn't be.
Either way. Ace was glad.
Very.
He looked back out at the garden and thought briefly of walking out. Enjoying the warm day. But the thought passed. He knew better.
Here, or out there, his conscious would follow and give him hell either way. A smile drifted across his lips. His conscious... It had been putting in overtime over the past several weeks. Definite overtime.
Everything in his world seem to bring guilt... depression. He was tired of it. So very tired of it, but uncertain how to shed it. Mona had helped. Tremendously. She had finally broken down his thick wall of self loathing. Broken it and crumbled it to dust, out on those wind swept cliffs. But the guilt remained. Would remain. Possibly for the rest of his life. Probably for the rest of his life.
How could he forget? What he had done, without doing.
No, he would not forget, but he could not dwell. No more. His friends deserved better then that. He deserved better. The smile that had faded, returned. The glasses were passed carefully from one hand to the other.
He had done Cosmo a great disservice in leaving. Doubly so for attempting to shield himself from his younger partner. Yet, Cosmo had held none of it against him. None. Not for shutting him out, not for shielding against him and most amazingly, not even for his attacks against him. His forgiveness had always been total. Complete and unwavering. Ace did not feel worthy of such a gift, but it warmed him all the same, and made him determined to make himself worthy of that forgiveness.
Ace had been proud when Cosmo had told him that he'd tried to continue his lesson's in Ace's absence. A new shard of guilt had stabbed him then. In his weeks of hiding at the house he had never once thought about Cosmo's studies. The fact that he had abandoned his responsibilities as a teacher on top of being a friend and partner cut him. A fact made worse by his realization that he had forgotten Cosmo's birthday as well.
Cosmo had just sighed and shook his head, looking annoyed or compassionate, or both, as the case may be. Assured him it was okay and that he hadn't blown anything up during his practices in Ace's absence. At least, nothing they couldn't afford to replace. Ace had actually laughed when Cosmo said that. Cosmo did at last confess, somewhat guiltily, to trying a new spell while he was gone. Ace had nearly gone through the roof. Such experimentation could be dangerous.. fatal even. He'd been upset to put it mildly. That was... until he learned what Cosmo had done.
Tried to track him down. Tried to get past the barriers Ace had erected.
The guilt had attempted to come back, but Cosmo crushed the emotion cruelly. With humor. With his general cheekiness and self confidence. Whenever Ace had started to return to his dark thoughts, Cosmo had been there to punt him back into the light. And when that didn't work, Mona or Vega would suddenly show up at the Express' doorstep.
Purely on whim, they would swear! Ace knew better. Much better. Particularly since Cosmo tended to disappear at these times. Especially when Mona popped up.
Ace chuckled. There had been a time when Ace had been the watcher. The one watching a brooding, young boy. Coaxing and assuring, not so much with words, but by a steady presence. A friendly companion.
Now the tables were turned and Cosmo had assumed the role of watcher. Friend. Guardian.
It made him all the more proud. For one brief, spiteful moment Ace wished Cosmo's real father was before him, just so he could biff him on the nose and say 'Look!'
'Look at what you would have destroyed... Wasted!'
It would never be. Probably better that way. Much better since he really did want to biff the man on the nose, if not worse. Ace got to see the results. That was enough. More than enough.
So many people had been so wrong about the Cosmo. Vega being one of them. Ace smiled, not in the least bit mad. Vega had been worried for Ace, not the young trouble maker that had entered his life.
Once again, that had changed. Had become completely the opposite. Vega still groaned and bemoaned Cosmo's magic use. The old cop would probably go to his grave doing so. Yet, Vega now too trusted the young man. Not just his magic, but his skill and his integrity. The integrity being only recently added to the cop's list.
'See what you started, Vega' he mused to his silent reflection. Eyes brushed over the white streaks. The sign of his magic. The sign of his own true self. As strange and unique as he was.
'You started this ball rolling, old friend. I'm just keeping up the momentum.'
He laughed again. Such thoughts Vega would glare at. Truth or not.
Vega had helped him in the past. Helped him now. He was not the constant, reassuring presence of his young partner. Or the gentle love and safe shelter of Mona. Vega was bedrock. Always there to fall back on. Always there to help. Ready, willing and able at any hour that he was needed. As long as you didn't mind him griping and grumping about it.
Hot air!
All of it!
Yet, it made Vega all the more precious to him.
Precious. All his friends. And he to them. Three very different people with one thing in common. A very unique magician. Amazing.
"Mr. Cooper?"
Ace spun about reflexively, startled.
Fear rose anew in his throat. Was something wrong? Had something happened?
Dr. Williams was there, looking up at him with a pleasant smile.
"We're all done," he announced simply.
Ace blinked.
Done? Already?
He looked at his watch and let out a small gasp. Two hours had already passed. Yet, it had been mere moments to him and his thoughts.
"How is Cosmo?" he asked, faintly worried over the answer.
Dr. Williams' smile brightened just a touch. Warmth graced his eyes.
"Just fine, Mr. Cooper. Just fine. The procedure went off without a hitch," he assured. The doctor held out a few sheets of papers to Ace. He took them, paging through them curiously.
"A do and don't list, along with Cosmo's prescriptions. One's an antibiotic, the other a painkiller. The painkiller can be taken rather arbitrarily, when needed, but he must take the antibiotics on a strict regiment," Dr. William's explained as Ace studied the scrawled notes. How a pharmacist could read doctor's handwriting was beyond him.
"Infection is usually the biggest problem with any type of reconstructive surgery. So keep him on them till they're all gone. That is an absolute must."
Ace nodded. "I'll make sure he takes them. I most certainly will," he promised sincerely. He most certainly would indeed. It was high time he resumed his role as guardian. As partner and friend. Cosmo had shouldered the burden for too long. Now it was Ace's turn to return the favor.
"Anything else?" he asked. Dr. Williams shrugged.
"That's the important stuff. Make sure he keeps the area clean, fresh bandage every morning. Ice pack if there's a problem with swelling. He'll have to come back in a week for a follow up. Just to make sure there are no complications. Everything is in the notes and if you have any questions you can reach me..." He paused to point at a number at the bottom of the sheet. "Here. That's my direct line. Reach me there. And, if any serious problems or reactions do arise, bring him back immediately."
"I hope that won't happen," Ace said softly. He truly did.
"Oh, I'm sure it won't," Dr. Williams chuckled. "Problems rarely occur after the actual surgery. But it's always good to warn people."
Ace nodded at that. Some people, including stubborn magicians, had to be reminded once in a while. He carefully delivered the papers to the safe confines of his cape. Along with Cosmo's precious glasses.
"May I see Cosmo?"
"Certainly, though he's still groggy." Dr. Williams turned, pausing briefly till Ace started walking alongside him.
"He will be fine, Mr. Cooper. Don't worry. He's young. Healthy. With a little time you'll never know the original cut was there," he assured as they made there way down the hall.
'Fat chance of that,' Ace thought to himself. Scar or no scar, Ace would know, and remember. But not dwell. No, he'd done enough of that. Just as Cosmo's wounds would heal, so would his and they'd both be whole in the end.
Dr. Williams held the door for him as Ace stepped through. He stopped briefly as the doctor touched his arm.
"Call me if there are any problems. Any!" Williams reiterated firmly, the warm eyes not detracting from the seriousness of the request. Ace smiled and nodded.
"I will. Thank you. For everything."
Dr. Williams simply smiled and nodded letting the door close behind him.
Ace looked to the bed were Cosmo was still stretched out. Though no longer burdened with the monitoring wires or the IV.
Groggy had been an understatement. The teen looked almost frail, a touch wasted. The doctor had warned them the surgery would take some toll on the young man. Minor as it was.
Cosmo turned toward him, eyes barely slits, as he stared fuzzily at him.
"Ace?"
"It's me, Cosmo," he assured brightly. Once again, the young man's face was bandaged. The white gauze stark against even Cosmo's pale complexion. Skin slightly puffy and bruised beneath the edges of the protective cotton.
The teen blinked and squinted, trying to get him into focus. Ace came alongside the bed but it didn't seem to help.
"You okay?" Cosmo asked thickly.
Ace laughed. "Isn't that suppose to be my line?" he returned. It took a second for the joke to pass the drugged haze. That in itself was humorous, but Ace would not tease. In the end, Cosmo smiled weakly.
"Cool," he stated, then tentatively reached up, fingers brushing across his face.
"Bandages again. Getting tired of this," he muttered, annoyed. Ace patted him gently on the shoulder, letting his hand rest there.
"It'll be the last time, partner."
Cosmo nodded, eyes dropping shut briefly, then opening again, but not really any clearer.
"Good with Ulene," he announced, pleased. Ace cocked a brow at him.
"What?" he asked, a touch confused.
"Ulene. She gets real motherly when I'm hurt," Cosmo went on cheerfully. He tried to wink, but it didn't quite work.
"It's a good thing," he went on. Ace laughed and shook his head. Trust a his young friend to think in such lines. Ahhh, young love.
"Enjoy it while it lasts. I want this to be the last time," Ace ordered. Cosmo smiled and chuckled.
"Me too, Ace, me too." He reached out and reflexively Ace caught his arm. Cosmo tried to sit up on his own, but in the end, it was Ace who did most of the work.
"Easy there," Ace suggested as Cosmo planted his hands on the bed, trying to retain his balance.
"Whoa, head rush," the teen announced, shaking his head slightly.
Ace kept one hand on his back as Cosmo slowly adapted to being upright. Though the drugs seemed to be quickly losing their grip on his friend, he was not willing to let go the contact just yet. He peered around the younger man's shoulder, catching his eyes.
"Are you okay?" he asked again, softly. Earnest gaze asking for an honest answer.
Cosmo met his eyes and while still glassy, his reflection was comprehensive.
"Yes, I am," he assured, then raised his own eyebrow.
"You?"
Ace smiled and nodded. "Better. Much better."
"'cause of this?"
The surgery. It was part of it. A small part.
"Yes and more. Much more," he admitted. Not that Cosmo minded. "I think, I've finally just reached a point where, I realized enough was enough," Ace went own softly.
Cosmo nodded knowingly. In anyone else but his empathic partner, the motion would have been mere politeness. In Cosmo, it was true understanding.
"About time," he announced cheekily, trying to grin, but it came out in a wince.
"Cosmo?"
He waved it off.
"'s okay. Just starting to feel things again," he muttered, not without a touch of humor.
"Well, Dr. Williams has kindly provided you with painkillers," Ace assured. Cosmo just rolled his eyes.
"Man, those things put me to sleep," he groused. Ace laughed.
"Worried about missing quality time with Ulene?" he asked innocently. Cosmo gave him a dirty look, but it was tempered with a smirk.
"You bet, man! What's the fun of having a pity party if you sleep through it?"
"Well, no party tonight. Rest and a quiet dinner," Ace stated matter-o-factly. He came around the bed and offered his arm again. Cosmo accepted, feet sliding to the floor. He leaned against the bed as he regained his balance, hand tightening briefly on Ace's arm.
"Vega and Mona," Cosmo declared suddenly.
Ace looked at him puzzled.
"What?"
"Want them to come over," Cosmo went on, pushing away from the bed, but still keeping a hand on Ace's arm.
Ace frowned. "I'm not sure about that, Cosmo. You just had surgery," he stated unhappily.
"Tell me something I didn't know, bro," Cosmo shot back, then smiled. He patted the older man's arm.
"Anyways, I want to have a celebration," he explained, as they started to the door.
"A celebration?" Ace raised his eyebrows. "For this?"
Cosmo paused at the door, turning slightly toward him. He was smiling, but it was an unusual smile. Very deep. Perceptive.
"For everything, Ace," he said simply.
Ace looked at him for a moment.
Everything?
He thought about it. Thought about it hard. A smile came slowly to his face as he nodded his understanding.
For everything.
Cosmo was right. They had everything to celebrate. Together.
"Okay," he finally capitulated. "But I want you in bed by ten. No arguments."
Cosmo chuckled and smiled.
"Yes, mom."