"Sheldon Swifties LIV: "The Adventures of Professor Proton's Smarter Son II…"
Summary: Brief bits, not necessarily connected…Similar to my Buffyverse "Immortal Beloved" series…
Disclaimer: What's Chuck's is Chuck's…No infringement intended…
Cue canned music…
Slightly shaky black and white video opens on scene of Sheldon and Amy in white lab coats standing in Sheldon and Leonard's living room…
Sheldon wearing fake glasses…Having bowed to Amy's and Penny's urging, backed by a completely serious and sober Leonard's careful agreement ("Is Leonard alright in the bathroom? I hear him howling…") that frames exactly matching Amy's would be both appealing and quite manly.
("What?" Leonard eyes Penny. "I feel kinda bad about lying to Amy as well as Sheldon…" sigh. "But you still went ahead and urged it on him…" "Well, of course, Leonard…You saw how he looked in Amy's glasses next to her in their matching lab coats…" chuckle…)
"Hello Science Fans…And welcome once again to the Adventures of Professor Proton…Junior…" Sheldon notes, pointing to whiteboard behind him on which is written… "The Adventures of Professor Proton, Jr."
"I hope you're ready to share in this week's Odyssey with me…And my good friend and colleague, Dr. Amy…" indicates Amy beside him.
Amy beams at Sheldon…
Imagine what the kids will make out of that… "good friend" she noted to herself, with rather guilty happiness.
Must have a talk with my bestie regarding this...
After all with great power, comes great responsibility. Can't lead thousands of young scientifically inclined boys astray with my alluring charms…
"Glad to be here, Professor P." Amy noted happily. "So…What fantastic journey of the mind have you planned for this week? Will it be a real…
Head trip?" grin to camera.
Sheldon, narrow sidelong glance…
Oh, very well…The need for whimsical pandering to an audience jaded by laugh tracked TV sitcoms…Yes…I…Under protest…Get it…To Amy's urgent glance back…
Director's signaling…Gotta get it rolling, Sheldon…
"Indeed…It will be quite…" repressed grimace… "A 'head trip'…But one carried out solely through that most wonderful of all mind-expanding experiences…
…Learning." Solemn nod to camera…
"That is the most wonderful of mind-expanding experiences, Professor P."
Excepting maybe one other all-natural one I can think of…Amy thought…
"Is it about time to begin…?" she continued.
"Yes. And funny it is…That you should…Mention that. Because…"
Chorus, Sheldon and Amy: "It's about Time…"
Oh, we are so in sync…Amy sighed.
"But first a short film to introduce our subject…Cameragirl Penny? Would you 'roll film'?" Sheldon called to Penny, out of sight.
("Cameragirl Penny"? Leonard eyed Penny by the video camera.
"Eh, it's ok…Kinda cute in its way, actually. And my character is never to be seen so there's this kinda neat bit of mystery to her…" She grinned. Pressing on laptop…
"Really…"
"Yeah…You know I've kinda created a whole backstory for her…" Penny beamed. "See 'cameragirl Penny' is this aspiring actress from …Kansas…Who came to LA to be a star…"
"I see…And when she didn't make it…"
"What?" Penny frowned. "Of course she made it…On the boards of the theater as we in the creative arts like to say…She's been hailed as the future of acting in America…A new Helen Hayes…But of course, being a true artist she's not willing to soil her craft in the pursuit of money…"
"So no luck breaking into TV or the movies?" he noted.
"…And she has a bitter boyfriend, disabled by lactose tolerance whom she's sacrificed herself to care for… "
"Right…Just as long as he doesn't start calling me, 'Labboy Leonard'" Leonard frowned.)
"And as we always say…" Sheldon beamed to Amy who beamed with him at camera… "Who's ready for some…Science…" echo effect…Science…Science… "…Adventures…" Adventures…Adventures…Adventures… Chorus…
Jerky old classroom style film begins…Complete with canned music…
"The Moody Institute of Science Presents:
The Mystery of Time…"
Cut to shot of Sheldon on the screen superimposed on a black and white image of a sundial…
"Yes…What is…Time?"
Amy in lab coat appears on screen beside him… "Sorry, Professor P…Got here as…Quickly as I could. Am I…In Time?" she eyes camera, slightly arch cock of head.
"Yes, Dr. Amy…Just…In Time, the nick of…As we so often whimsically like to say." nod.
"But what is it that we are, In…If we are, in…Time?" Sheldon eyes camera, arch stare, one eyebrow raised.
"Whoa. Way to blow my mind, Professor P." Amy looks at camera, stunned look.
"And blow it more we will. But lets let our friend from…The Past…Take it from here…While we watch, from the corner here." Sheldon notes…
"Lets, Professor P…" Amy nods.
("What?" Penny eyed Leonard, with grin… "I thought this was meant for kids…" Leonard eyed her, mock frown).
Narrator appears in black and white, wearing 1950s suit "The Mystery is Time, the Haunted House is Space." He intones.
"And the Ghosts travel at the Speed of Light and come from out of the Past, your Past." The narrator takes a seat… " Have you ever tried to define Time? The harder you search for a definition, the more it slips through your fingers. We're going to study the Mystery of Time in the Laboratory. But before we find the Ghosts of the Past, we'll have to sort through some facts…"
"Yes…" Sheldon reappears… "Time is indeed a Mystery…" Mystery…Mystery…Mystery… "For us to solve. And we must as our friend from 1957 tells us, search through…The Facts. But we're not afraid of searching things out, are we Dr. Amy?"
"Oh, I'd be willing to search just about anywhere you say, Professor P., Junior. Just lead…The Way." Hand flip…
"Indeed, as I would…Given the poor understanding of Time most of our viewers are sure to have. But today we have a special guest to help us search out the Facts about Time, Dr. Amy?"
"Oh, my." Stare at camera. "A special guest, Professor P, Junior? And I didn't even put on my special guest lab coat."
"No need, Dr. Amy…You already did…" narrow-eyed stare at camera.
Dat-dat-dah…Music.
"…In the future."
"Whoa. And I'm not even aware of doing that."
"Well, that's thanks to our special guest…A time traveler."
Amy makes large hand waves… "Hold the horses, Professor P, Junior. I thought there weren't any such things as Time Travelers. Now you say we have one as our special guest. How can this be?" she stares at the camera.
("You ok?" "Oh, yeah…")
"Oh, it can be…If your special guest is Time Traveler Marty McFly!"
Thin clapping…As Leonard with slicked hair, in red Marty McFly vest, slides across living room floor on skate board…
("We'd best dub that clapping in later…" Penny began…)
"Whoa! Oh…!" crashing sound outside camera range…
(Yeah, in fact we'll dub that whole thing in later…Knew I should've insisted on a stunt double…)