It didn't take long for Shuichi's life to fall apart at the seams. He supposed it was fitting; it didn't take long for his life to come together perfectly. He instantly fell in love with Yuki, and Bad Luck's success was almost instantaneous. Things seemed so perfect; he nearly forgot good things never last.
With Bad Luck quickly becoming the most popular band in Japan, the boys had very little time to live normal lives. They were constantly in the studio, on tour, putting on concerts, spitting out singles and CD's. Paparazzi and crazed fans followed them everywhere, shoving cameras in their faces and microphones under their noses. The pressure was amazing in the worst way.
Shuichi was under so much stress, gone so often, that his relationship with Yuki was suffering. Yuki couldn't stand the extra attention that he garnered from being with Shuichi. The paparazzi began to chase him down streets as well, and not because of his own success. Shuichi began snapping at Yuki without much provocation, resulting in the worst fights their relationship endured each time. Although he would always cry and apologize after, every incident took its toll.
Looking back, Shuichi knew he should have realized he wasn't happy. Nobody was.
Shuichi kept his head down as he darted from NG to the black escalade waiting for him. The camera flashes were like a strobe light. K stood beside him, keeping him close, and the reporters at bay.
"Shindou! Over here, look this way!"
"Hello, Shuichi, how's the new album?"
"Give us a smile! Where's your energy, come on!"
"How are things with Yuki, fighting again?"
Even when he was in the vehicle, the paparazzi pressed their cameras to the windows, still screaming questions. Shuichi sighed miserably. Hiro, who was already safely in the vehicle seated beside Suguru, put his hand on Shuichi's shoulder lightly. He tried to smile at his friend, but Shuichi could tell Hiro felt the same way he did. The only one who seemed to enjoy the attention was Suguru, waving pleasantly at the reporters. The tabloids had looked upon him kindly, complimenting him in every aspect. They weren't always so nice to the others.
"It's just too much, y'know?" Shuichi mumbled. Hiro nodded, but he had no words. It was part of the business. They shared a weak, fake smile. Hiro's hand fell away, and Shuichi looked out the window, contemplating.
Why did they insist and pretending? This wasn't who he was—he expressed himself honestly. Yet, each day, he found he smiled when he felt like crying.
Because of all the people trying to pry into their lives, Shuichi and Yuki had to move to a place with more security. It was actually a happy moment for the couple, even under the circumstances. It was the first time they officially made it both of their place.
They had fun making it home, making it comfortable, breaking in every room. Shuichi lived for those moments with Yuki. When they weren't screaming at each other, they were truly in love. Those moments, Shuichi felt, were the only thing keeping him together.
Despite dragging his feet to the door, Shuichi made sure there was bounce in his step when he got inside. He wanted things to be normal with Yuki. He wanted to be happy with him, wanted Yuki to be happy. The one thing that never changed in all the madness was how much he loved Yuki. So he didn't mind trying to fake happiness, although he really didn't have the energy some nights.
Looking back Shuichi should have realized he wasn't happy. Nobody was. Not Hiro. Not Yuki. Looking back, he shouldn't have been surprised that Yuki was waiting, with his things packed.
Probably the only surprising thing about the conversation was the fact that Yuki waited around to have it with him. Feeling numb, Shuichi could only listen as Yuki explained that things were too much for him lately. He didn't want his life plastered on the cover of every shit tabloid at the newsstand. Shuichi's attitude was wearing on him too, it was too forced, they fought too often, and he wished Shuichi could be honest, but was frightened by the prospect as well. He couldn't bear to hear that he was unhappy with him. And his health was affected. His relatives were pressuring him, his editor.
He needed to leave to get in touch with himself again. He stopped beside Shuichi before walking past. "I haven't stopped loving you… I hope we can both remember who we are while I'm gone." He kissed Shuichi softly, and left.
Shuichi was too numb to notice that Yuki was crying the entire time, or that he was too. He stood there until the sun came up.
And that's how he felt for the next couple of months.