Disclaimer: I own nothing

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Chapter 1

Oliver looked up from his paperwork as soon as he heard the three sharp knocks on his door.

"Come in" he called and waited for a few seconds till the person came it.

"Mr. Queen, this just came for you" his secretary said handing him an ivory colored card written with the handwriting of a person he knew all too well.

"Thank you Mary" he replied and took the card from her.

Ollie,

Would you be able to meet me at Le Monet tonight at seven? I have something I need to talk to you about.

Dinah

He placed the ivory colored card in his drawer along with all the other cards that he'd received from Dinah. He quickly scrawled back a note saying that he'd be able to make it and gave it to Mary to deliver.

At seven Oliver walked into Le Monet and went over to their usual table. Dinah was already there dressed in a black dress with spaghetti straps. She looked up at him, giving him a small smile as he walked over to her and kissed her cheek.

"So" he said as he took a seat opposite her "what did you want to talk about?"

"Look" she said taking a deep breath "I don't think this is working anymore" she said and he looked slightly puzzled.

"What do you mean?"

"Us Ollie, we're not working anymore" she said gesturing from him to her.

"What? Dinah that's crazy I love you" he said leaning forward.

"I know, but maybe that's the problem. I mean we both love each other, we're just not in love with each other".

"Come on Dinah, you know that's not true" Oliver replied.

"Yes Ollie it is, and although I think we have amazing sex I feel that that's all there is. Our relationship is purely physical. You're not ready to commit to this relationship I don't even think marriage has even occurred to you at all has it?" she asked waiting for his answer but when none came, it confirmed her suspicions.

"Marriage?" he asked gulping.

"See what I mean? You're not ready for it and I am. I am ready to be a wife and a mother Oliver but you're not ready to give me that. I want kids Ollie" she said and Oliver looked uneasy.

"Kids?" he asked. "But kids would slow us down and dull our marriage" he replied.

"See? That's just it. I don't think we're going anywhere in our relationship. Like I said, I love you but I'm not in love with you. I'm sorry Oliver, I wish it didn't have to be this way but I've wasted three years of my life with you and I'm not going to waste any more". With that she placed her napkin on the table and with a last kiss on his cheek; she walked past him out the door and out of his life.

Three hours later, Oliver found himself sitting at a shady rundown bar drinking his body weight in alcohol. "Another beer please" Oliver said beckoning the bartender over. When the beer was placed in front of him, he wasted no time in knocking it back. Her words rang in his head over and over again like a broken record.

"I love you Ollie, but I'm just not in love with you. I've wasted three years of my life with you and I'm not going to waste any more. I'm ready to be a wife and a mother and you're not ready to give me that".

He shook his head again trying to clear away that haunting voice, taking a large gulp of his beer. He didn't know what he was doing here of all places, he stuck out like a sore thumb. His forest green shirt and black slacks looked like they belonged at Saks Fifth Avenue rather than at some dingy roadhouse bar. Yet for the first time that day he felt comfortable. The cool bottle of beer seemed to numb the dull throbbing ache in his heart for a while. He was so absorbed in his own troubles that he didn't notice the door to the bar open. Most of the men in the bar had stopped what they were doing to look at the woman who'd now stepped, albeit nervously, into the dimly lit bar. She too looked incredibly out of place with her crisp short black work skirt and her white blouse and bright red heels. She had been wearing the same clothes since morning and she was not in the best of moods. Ignoring the suggestive leers she was receiving from the uncouth men in the bar, she made her way to the lone figure sitting at the bar top.

"Oliver" she said when she reached him.

"Sidekick? What are you doing here?" he asked slurring slightly.

"I am here because the boys were worried about you and they wanted me to check on you" she said simply and subtly pushed his beer further away from him.

"Why didn't they check on me themselves" he asked turning around unsteadily to face her.

"They're smart, they decided to avoid pushing themselves into the line of fire" she replied. "Do you know how long it took for me to access your location from your car's tracking device? And you wouldn't believe my shock when I got to your car only to find a homeless hobo sitting in the front seat. I can't believe you gave away your brand new BMW to a hobo" she said flopping onto a bar stool beside him.

"Doesn't matter to me" he replied and took a large swig of his beer.

"Come on Ollie, that's enough" she said firmly taking the bottle of beer away from him and placed her hands on her hips.

"You can have that if you want" he said and beckoned the bartender over for another beer.

Chloe sighed as she watched the broken shell of a man before her. Something was wrong with Oliver; he never acted like this unless something was really bothering him.

"Ollie are you ok?" she asked placing a hand on his arm.

"Oh yes I'm absolutely fine, the woman that I'm in love with just told me that she doesn't want to be with me anymore because I'm not ready to commit. So to answer your question sidekick is yes I'm bloody fine".

"Look Ollie, I know you're hurting but this isn't the right way to go about it. Just come back with me ok? I promise everything will be fine" Chloe said taking his arm.

"I'm not coming with you or anyone. Just leave me here" he slurred, his head lolling to one side.

"Clark" she whispered using the communicator "I need some help here".

"I'm on my way" she heard him reply and with a soft swish he was by her side.

"Clark" she breathed letting out a sigh of relief.

"What's wrong with him?"

"He's consumed his body weight in alcohol, that's what's wrong with him" Chloe replied.

"Let's get you out of here" Clark told Oliver and supported him up.

"I like big butts and I cannot lie" Oliver said and both Chloe and Clark stopped for a moment to stare at him. Then without a word his head dropped to the side and his eyes closed.

"Oh great" Chloe remarked sarcastically "just what we need".

Chloe took off Oliver's shoes and socks and helped him get settled into his bed. Looking at the man sleeping peacefully before her brought a small smile to his lips. Tonight was actually the first time she had seen him lose control. He must have really loved Dinah. She pulled his blankets up to his armpits and brushed the hair away from his face.

"So you think now's a good time to tell him about Lex's insanely large shipment of meteor rocks?" Bart asked from beside her gesturing to the sleeping man on the bed. Oliver stirred and turned over onto his side.

"Where did you come from? Wait. Never mind I don't want to know" Chloe replied.

"I'm just going to remove his shirt so why don't you go tell the others that he's ok" Chloe said and before she knew it Bart was gone.

After removing Oliver's shirt she folded it and placed it on his bedside table in front of a framed photo of him and Dinah. She was about to get up and leave when his arm shot out and held her hand.

"Sidekick?" he asked groggily.

"The one and only" she replied with a smile.

"She said she didn't want to be with me because I'm not ready to have kids. Who wants to have kids anyway, they only slow you down" mumbled and then closing his eyes he promptly rolled over and went to sleep with his thumb in his mouth.

If Chloe wasn't so filled with pity for the man before her, she would have laughed. This was a whole new different side to Oliver that she was seeing. "Goodnight Ollie" she whispered and turned off the lights.

Oliver woke up with a splitting headache. His head felt like someone had taken a sledgehammer and bashed him on the head repeatedly.

"Oww" he groaned nursing his head with his hand. He flopped back into bed and closed his eyes. "Just a little while longer" he said sleepily and closed his eyes. Suddenly he felt weight on his chest and opening one eye he saw a little blonde head staring at him curiously. He closed his eyes shut again immediately.

"Daddy" he heard it say "stop being silly, I know you're awake".

Well he almost had her fooled didn't her. Wait. What did she just call him? He sat up in his bed so suddenly that the little blonde on his chest fell backwards with a squeal.

"Daddy" she shrieked "you always do that".

"Daddy? Did you just call me daddy?" he asked her and she nodded. "I'm not your daddy" he replied looking horrified.

"Yes you are. Daddy are you ok? You don't look to good" she said eyeing Oliver's pale complexion.

"I-I-I" he stammered.

"Oooh wait till I tell mommy that you had one too many drinks with Uncle Bruce again" she replied cheekily and Oliver's eyes widened.

"Mommy?" he asked dumbly.

"Yes mommy" the little blonde replied looking irritated. They drifted off into an uneasy silence with the little girl staring curiously at him and him trying his best to ignore her.

Just when he thought things couldn't get any weirder a loud wailing pierced the air. "What the hell is that" he asked her and she put her hands on her hips, a gesture that seemed oddly familiar to him.

"Don't use the word hell daddy, it's not very nice" she scolded "and that would be your son Carl" she said hopping off the bed. Oliver stared after her. "Well" she asked putting her hands on her hips again. "Aren't you coming? He needs a diaper change and it's your turn today". Oliver turned a pale shade of green.

"A- a diaper change?" he asked looking revolted.

"Yes daddy a diaper change, now stop being so melodramatic" she chided and bounced out of the room with her two blonde pigtails swinging behind her. He followed her with unsteady legs until they reached a room painted in an emerald green wall papered with archers and Robin Hood.

"Nice décor" he mused as he glimpsed the room from the outside.

"Well you chose it" the little girl replied grumpily.

The first thing that hit Oliver as he entered the room was the stench. It smelt worse than any rotting corpse he had been unfortunate enough to come into contact with. He held his nose to prevent himself from wanting to throw up.

The little girl was standing by the crib looking at him with utmost annoyance and standing with her hands on her hips. He felt like he should know the little girl. There was something about her that reminded him of…he couldn't place it but he felt like he should know her.

"So are you coming or not?" she asked.

He willed himself to walk towards her. "So what am I supposed to do?" he asked and she looked at him like he'd gone mad. "Its just that daddy" he said feeling the name drop off his tongue "hit his head a little too hard last night and can't seem to remember a lot of things".

"Oh daddy" the little girl exclaimed and bounded over to him, hugging him around his legs. "Does it hurt?" she asked looking up at him with sparkling green eyes.

"Uh yes it hurts a little so try not to speak too loudly ok?" he asked and she nodded.

"I feel for you daddy" she replied simply, tears brimming in her emerald orbs. Then detaching herself from her fathers legs she walked over to the crib.

"Wait, how old are you anyway?" he asked.

"I am five daddy, but mommy says I'm smart for my age" she said holding up five fingers "you should know that, I celebrated my birthday last month". She looked at him disapprovingly.

"Right I bet you are. It's the head thing, it makes me forget" he replied pointing to his head and her little mouth formed a 'O'.

"Its ok daddy I understand" she replied and stood on a little box by the crib to coo to her brother. "Hello Carlie Warlie! Looks like you did a stinky one today" she said placing her hands over her mouth and giggling.

"Oh dear god" Oliver exclaimed as he got closer to Carl. "I have to change this?" he asked the little blonde. Speaking of the little blonde, he didn't even know her name. "By the way kid, what's your name?"

She looked at him with an expression of disbelief. "Daddy you must have really hit your head hard not to remember the name of your favorite child" she said and he fought the urge to laugh at her expression. "I'm Lois" she said pointing to herself proudly. He staggered backwards. feeling flabbergasted.

"Who named you that?" he asked looking at her.

"Well you and mommy did of course" she replied looking incredulous.

"What? I would never have given you such a stu"- Lois narrowed her eyes "I mean stimulating name like Lois" he said.

"Daddy you're crazy" was all she replied as she bounced along getting various diaper changing instruments.

"Ok look how about you help me change Carl while I get some aspirin for my poor head" Oliver asked looking at Lois.

"Ok" she replied "but what's in it for me?" she asked and this time is was Oliver who looked at her incredulously.

"I beg your pardon?" he asked.

"I mean the previous times I've been charging you two bucks but Uncle Bart told me I've been selling myself short. He said I should up the stakes a little".

"I'm going to kill Bart" Oliver mumbled "I'm making a deal with a five year old".

"If it makes you feel better daddy I'll be six in eleven months" she replied with a smile, displaying all her milk teeth.

"This is officially a nightmare. I must be dreaming" he reasoned.

"No your not" Lois replied and promptly pinched him hard.

"Ow, ok I'm not dreaming. I think we've established that" he exclaimed.

"So what's it going to be daddy are you going to give me something to help you change Carl or are you going to do it yourself?" she asked.

"Well how I about I just not do it at all" Oliver said.

"Uh-oh I don't think that's a very good idea daddy. Mommy said that if you don't change Carl, she's not going to give you any prideledges tonight".

"I think you mean privileges" Oliver replied.

"Yep that's the one".

"Ok fine, how about I give you five bucks and you help me change Carl?" he asked holding out a five dollar note he's scavenged from his pocket.

"You're kidding me aren't you daddy? Uncle Bart said I should settle for no less than ten bucks" she said authoritatively.

"What that's insane. I'm not giving you ten bucks to change a baby's diaper" he remarked.

"Well then" she said folding her hands "good luck with changing Carl" she said and was about to walk out the door.

"Ok wait alright I'll give you ten bucks. Ok? Happy?" he asked and dug around his pockets for another five dollars.

"YAY" she exclaimed and jumped up and down.

"Ok I only have a five on me but how about I write you an IOU? And then I'll give you the other half later".

"Sorry I don't do IOUs" she replied and turned up her nose on him.

"Ok, ok I'll get the rest now. You just wait here" he said and ran back to his room to get his wallet.

"Ok" he said coming back a while later "I've got the other five" he said handing her another five dollar bill.

"Well" she said looking thoughtful "since this is an awfully stinky one, I think I should get paid a little more". She looked up at him with puppy dog eyes.

"Ok fine" he said grumpily and handed her another five dollar bill. "Can't believe I'm being scammed by a five year old he muttered.

She smiled brightly and went over to change her brother. Oliver watched as she did everything carefully and precisely while humming to herself.

"So where is your mommy anyway?" he asked.

"She went for a jog when she woke up but I think by now she'd have gone in for a shower" Lois replied. "There all done" she announced as she taped the diaper together. Carl gurgled happily and Oliver leaned over to look at the baby in the crib. He was little about six months or so, Oliver couldn't tell. He'd never really come into contact with many babies in his life time. The kid looked somewhat like him with a darker shade of blonde on his head.

"No Carl here is going to go back to sleep and I'm going to watch Spongebob Squarepants" she said pulling him by the hand back to his room. "And you're going to watch it with me" she said and Oliver groaned which he quelled when she shot him a dirty look.

Oliver flopped onto the bed, stretching out his legs. He was bare bodied; only wearing his pants from last night. His forest green shirt was folded neatly and kept on his bedside table. Lois switched on the plasma screen mounted on the wall in front of the bed and then climbed onto his lap.

"OOOOH who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS. Absorbent and yellow and porous is he. Spongebob Squarepants. If nautical nonsense be something you wish SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS. Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS".

Oliver watched in horror as a yellow sponge like creature appeared on screen along with an obese pink star like creature. They would do something incredibly stupid and then laugh maniacally at their lack of brains. Oliver had heard that Spongebob Squarepants was turning somewhat cultish. He'd heard of children everywhere succumbing to its hilarity, but he'd never believed it. Yet right in front of him, his own 'supposed' daughter was staring as if hypnotized at the screen.

"Isn't he the greatest daddy?" Lois asked pointing to Spongebob. "I like Spongebob but mommy prefers Patrick. She thinks he's sillier" she said putting her hands over her mouth and giggling girlishly.

Oh dear god. His future wife watched this hideous abomination as well? Which crackpot did he marry? And why in her right mind would she watch this ridiculous children's TV show. He gently pushed Lois off his lap and went to the dressing table that was at the corner of the room. He was hoping to get some clues to as who he might have married. As he passed his en suite bathroom he heard humming coming from within and he willed himself to wait a little longer.

He caught sight of a two framed pictures by the dressing table. The first one was of him and Clark posing together looking all chummy with each other. The second one was a framed picture of the whole justice league. Everyone was there, Bart, Victor, AC, Dinah, Chloe, Clark and himself. It looked like it was taken at Queen Towers. But he was still no closer to finding out who he married. He was about to go back to watching Spongebob with Lois when he caught sight of something that made his breath hitch in his throat. Looking in the mirror, he caught sight of his reflection. His eyes were a shade darker than he remembered and his hair was longer than he would have liked. Along with that he had a few wrinkles here and there but apart from that, he looked the same. He'd aged well. He grinned at his reflection and by doing so looked a god couple of years younger.

"Make mental note" he mumbled to himself "smile more".

"Daddy what are you looking at?" Lois called from her perch on the bed.

"Nothing, just realizing that I'm old" he replied.

"But daddy" she said looking puzzled "you were always old".

"Maybe to you" he mumbled back grouchily "but when I was younger, many would have killed for this face".

"Really?" she asked looking surprised "I wouldn't".

"Now is your mom going to be in there the whole day? Or is she planning on coming out sometime soon?" he asked and Lois shrugged her shoulders.

"Hold your horses Ollie, I'm out already" a voice replied and Oliver turned in the direction of the bathroom and his jaw dropped.

"Sidekick?" he asked gulping.

"Yes my darling?" she asked her voice husky.

Oliver was temporarily paralyzed. There she was; sidekick, watchtower, Chloe Sullivan. There she was standing right in front of him, wearing nothing but a towel.

A/N: Just to let you know I have nothing against spongebob in fact I love him. I just didn't think Oliver would. Hope you liked it…and please dear readers do review!! The more reviews I get the faster I update.