Goodbye, My Headmaster
Snape's head was pounding, and it felt as though it was going to explode that very moment, but he kept running. The scars along his right hand were searing deep into his pale flesh, and he knew that Draco couldn't do it. He'd known it all along; he knew this day would come. As he ran he felt his heart pounding twice as hard as usual, and knew that he needed to get to the tower as soon as he could. He held his wand tight in his hand and jogged faster, passing the greenhouses. Hogwarts' magic preventing his reaction to apparate he was reduced to a pathetic sprint. "Draco," he murmured to himself as he flew through the night. "My God, Draco. . .Narcissa. . .Oh bloody Merlin. . ." He looked up from the shadow of the side of Hogwarts as he ran and saw the Astronomy tower looming in the near distance. He swallowed to try and contain his fear, as he always had ever since he looked Lilly in the eyes for the first time. He continued on, staring at the solemn tower reaching to the sky where the Dark Mark was imprinted, gazing at him with mockery. He saw a few silhouettes at the top, under the dome, and spotted with ease the figure that was Dumbledore. From that moment on he felt nauseous, and memories came back in brief glimpses before his eyes.
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"I don't understand this recipe!" a young boy pouted in the empty Potions classroom after the school day was over, skipping dinner so he could work. "The juice from the Ptomus beans would come out so much easier if you simply applied pressure to the bean, added a Frutimius charm, and then cut it! You can't get it from dicing it, that's preposterous!" He was furiously scribbling notes in his Potions book when he heard footsteps enter the room.
". . .You know, I do agree, and I couldn't of said it better myself," chuckled the headmaster as he walked in, tan and gold robes and hat framing himself. The child's eyes widened in embarrassment as he gazed at him while the headmaster planted himself on top of a desk easily.
"I-I," the child stammered in nervousness. He fell silent before the headmaster, forgetting the man's name, yet remembering that he wasn't supposed to be in the classroom now. He was caught red handed by this proud looking man; he felt about the size of a mouse. He froze and looked straight at the headmaster.
"No, you're quite right, I actually did the same thing you did when I was making that potion," the man said shrugging and smiling. The child stared, bewildered that he wasn't in trouble for being in class after hours, shouting, or writing in the school's books. "You look quite flustered my boy, why, as if you've been petrified! Please, don't be, I promise I've had all my shots. . . .Well then,. . . what is your name?" the headmaster finally asked. "One typically should know the names of the person they are talking to. I am Dumbledore, in case you have forgotten," he added with a glint in his eye. Snape felt slightly jumpy-how had he known? Despite his fear he finally found his voice.
". . .S-severus," he replied after a moment. "My name's Severus Snape."
"Well then, Serverus Snape, I encourage you to delve deeper into the magic of Potions, I feel like you have a calling there. And that?" Dumbledore said while pointing to Snape's scribbles "keep doing that. You have better ideas than the writers themselves it seems, which comes as no surprise to me!" He gave a throaty chuckle, a sweet, infective kind of laugh, which made Snape giggle in bashfulness and relief. "Well my boy, I must be off, but I do hope we run into each other again soon!" With that Dumbledore arose and began to stride out of the room, but not before giving Snape a warm grin and handshake.
"S-see you later Headmaster," Snape said, nervously smiling. Dumbledore nodded merrily and then left the room. Soon it was quiet again, and cold. He was left wondering where the headmaster had decided to go, and wondering when he would run into him again. Maybe-
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"No!" Snape shouted as he went on. He felt guilt mounting inside himself and hadn't even reached the tower yet. Despite his cry his mind wandered. . . .
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"Ah, Severus! It's been too long!" Dumbledore said energetically as Snape walked into his office. The sunlight was a beautiful tangerine which coincidentally matched the Dumbledore's hat and robes.
"Indeed," Snape said coughing awkwardly while looking at Dumbledore's attire. "Well, you see Dumbledore; I am here on a matter of business. I. . .I would like to teach here," Snape said calmly while staring at his old headmaster. "I saw that you needed a Potions master," he said gesturing to a Daily Prophet that was laying on a stack of books nearby.
"Still a man of few words and more action I see. Well, it would truly be an honor Mr. Snape. Please, sit down," Dumbledore said gesturing towards a cushy chair and flicking his wand, making a contract and quill appear out of thin air. "I must say that I've missed my old student." Snape opted for a plain wooden stool and sat down before the headmaster.
". . .I've missed Hogwarts," Snape said while gazing around the magnificent office, finally ending by looking at the headmaster himself. ". . .I have missed Hogwarts, and I have also missed you, Headmaster," he admitted while glancing coolly away, hiding his admiration for his mentor. Dumbledore simply smiled.
"Well then, let us make sure everything is in order, and then both of our quandaries will be solved," said Dumbledore with a light nod. "And since we'll be working together, please, don't hesitate to call me Albus my young friend." At that Snape felt himself instinctively smile but turned away.
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"S-snape," uttered Dumbledore as Snape directed Dumbledore's floating body with his wand to the door on the outside of the castle wall that led to the dungeons and his classroom.
"Albus, do not speak unless I ask you to," Snape uttered quickly as he strode faster to the door, straining his eyes in the cold shadow of the night despite his lit wand he held high above his head. He glanced back over and saw Albus give a weak nod, and stopped himself from purging at the singed and ashy flesh, oozing yellow pus, and white bone that was Albus' hand. "Please, a few moments longer, and the pain will be gone. Right?" There was no reply and Snape felt his body stiffen as he finally reached the hidden door and thrust it open. He quickly shut it and then began to run along cautiously in the narrow tunnel with the floating body. "Albus!" whispered Snape at the top of his lungs as he snapped his head back to his mentor and saw his chest faintly rising and falling, the breathing barely echoing on the brick walls along with his footsteps. "Albus, answer me this instant and let me know you will not give in to the pain!" Still, Snape received silence. Finally his tension broke free. "Headmaster!" At that Dumbledore stirred, his head bobbing as they entered the cold tunnel leading to the Potions room.
"I-I'm here Serverus, please, I thought you already knew the obvious answer to that, so please . . .calm yourself. . .," Dumbledore managed to rasp, but only to then shake violently.
"Headmaster!"Snape almost screamed, his head spinning as he kicked in the door to the Potions classroom. He quickly conjured up a bed and laid Albus on it gently, and began ripping open his drawers and retrieving the items needed for creating the antidote to inject into what was left of Albus' hand so he could save it, as well as a strong potion to regain his health. "Please, hold on a little longer, I've got the ingredients, and soon you'll be restored," Snape said, forcing himself to remain calm so he could think straight.
"Oh, I am not worried," croaked Dumbledore, sounding at ease despite his condition. Snape looked up in surprise at Albus' voice. ". . .I trust you completely Severus."
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Snape climbed the stairs of the Astronomy tower wheezing. The spell of the Unbreakable Vow was beginning to take it's final effects before. . .
Snape ran faster.
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Snape walked into Dumbledore's office smoothly and stood before him. Dumbledore stared him straight in the eyes, his ice blue eyes piercing his cheery demeanor. "Severus, I need to talk with you about something quite important I'm afraid."
"How out of character," Snape smirked. Albus chucked sadly at his student's dry humor that characterized him.
"You have always been a man of few words, so I will follow your example and make this as clear as I am able. You are already aware of my hunt for Voldemort's Horcruxes and my," at this Dumbledore looked halfheartedly at his right hand and held it out to Snape,"small risks." Snape swallowed and nodded while looking at the bandaged hand he had only repaired a few nights ago. He nodded for Dumbledore to continue while Dumbledore withdrew his hand. "In the case that I should die, please serve as Minerva's right hand man while she is headmaster, and I ask you to continue my search for the Horcruxes along with Harry." Snape's eyes widened as he looked up at Albus, but he knew what he was to do.
"I promise," said Snape.
"In the case that you should have to kill me," said Dumbledore, the glint in his eyes returning and Snape's blood running cold at the words that came from his headmaster's mouth, "I ask that you do what you must, even if that does mean killing me, so long as Voldemort will be defeated, and there will be peace in our world once more. Even if you must abandon your teaching post and your name, I understand that. I merely hope that you do."
". . .I do," choked out Snape, his smooth attitude gone, leaving him a bare and scared man of what the future would bring. He was sweating bullets as he held his head in his hand, the other hand balled into a determined fist. "I understand." He closed his eyes and shook his head gravely.
"Very good," Dumbledore said with a nod. "Well then, would you care for a lemon crumpet? They're quite delicious you know though they are a bit sour. Go figure," he added with some cheer. Just like that he was back to his strange and humorous self. Snape shook his head and finally looked up at him very pained.
"You know don't you?"
"What do I know Serverus?"
"What will probably happen. What I will have to do to you," Snape murmured with hurt. He couldn't look in Dumbledore's eyes, and instead stared at the patterns on the oval carpet he was standing on.
"As a matter of fact, I don't," Dumbledore said lightly. Snape couldn't help but look up in mild confusion.
"Hm?"
"I don't know what the future holds. I do not have the Inner Eye as our Professor Trelawney does. I could drop down dead tomorrow for all that I know about the future Severus," Dumbledore said evenly while Snape's eyes clouded. "However," Dumbledore said, which caused Snape to look up, "if you had to kill me for some reason, well, I think I'd be quite alright. I know you would carry out my final request of you, and I could die knowing that peace would be returned. Not to mention that I would be leaving this world by my friend's hand, which I would prefer over Voldemort's or that nasty woman Lestrange's-any day."
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Snape was staring at Albus when he finally awoke from his barrage of memories, and was doing everything in his power to keep a stone front before Draco, the Death Eaters, and Bellatrix. He looked up at Dumbledore who gave him the slightest nod, and with that Snape knew. He quickly and silently formed the words, "Goodbye my Headmaster." In the background he heard Bellatrix screech at him and he knew what he had to do.
"Avada Kedavra!" Snape bellowed, and at that a green jet of light shot out from the tip of his frail wooden wand and pierced through the chest of Albus Dumbledore. Snape watched the life drain from Albus' frost blue eyes and felt his own life restored by the Unbreakable Vow being fulfilled. He quickly spun on his heel and began racing down the tower, away from the scene of the crime; the murder of the greatest wizard of all time-the murder of his best teacher and friend.
"Bloody Merlin, I wish it had been me. . . .I must fulfill his wishes, somehow. No matter what it takes. My God, I wish it had been me."
These were the last thoughts Snape had in the castle of Hogwarts.
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