This was it. Nothing more, nothing less. All things end, just like this would have had to end in some form. It was just a whisper in the dark, a small blip in the darkness that enveloped them. They had fought together, laughed together, lived together, and been there for each other as quiet companions. This is all that was left.
A small light flickered. It had little understanding, or little idea of what it was, or what was going on, it only knew it had to do something, or help someone. It tried to grasp onto ideas, and thoughts but everything was just slightly out of reach, out of focus, and out of place. Slowly, the mind began to reach with everything it had and pull a small fragment towards itself in a attempt to grasp reality.
A feeling of loss overcame the light, as though something had been ripped from it, never to been seen again. It didn't know why it was feeling this loss, but it knew this sensation was part of itself, one small part that embodied what was once a singular entity. It enveloped the loss around itself, and It became one of with the fragment, forming a singular entity. The fragment and the light merged together, and the light became to grasp its own existence.
It didn't know who or what it was, but that It was alive (if just barely), It remembered that whatever it was that It had to do, it was extremely important. This new found urgency became an anchoring point on which the light could see the other fragments, and began pulling them towards itself in an attempt to reach singularity.
As the light pulled another fragment towards itself, it suddenly remembered a man, a man that was …
"Was what?", the light thought, as it couldn't find the memories required to finish the sentence. It just knew that somehow, all of this tied together. Was this sense of urgency and importance related to this man? So many questions filled the light with a purpose, and the desire for answers caused It to pull another fragment towards itself.
Despair. Strong, powerful, unadulterated despair filled the light. The light felt a sadness that it didn't know it could feel, and while it didn't understand why it felt it, it understood that it should, as the despair was once a part of itself when it was a singular existence. The divided mind sought the singularity required to understand itself, and in desperation, pulled more shards inwards upon itself.
Emotions began to flood the light, with fragments of memory. It remembered a great battle, many fights, battles across the cosmos itself, and horrors that were almost unimaginable. A deep-seated loneliness began to flood the light, as it knew that while it was alone, it knew that other lights, other minds existed, and despair reached an overwhelming point that threatened to shatter the light. It searched through its newly found memories, and found an emotion that could overpower the despair.
Hope.
Hope flooded the light, combating the despair that had been threatening it. Hope for a better day, hope of rescue from this imprisonment, hope to not be alone, hope to be with "him" again, hope for a better future. The hope and despair reached a state of homeostasis within the light, allowing It to accept these emotions into itself, and still survive.
The light continued to pull fragments upon itself, and slowly it began to remember. Piece by piece, it began to rebuild its shattered and fractured memories. It remembered a place called Reach, the closest thing It had to a birthplace; a fortress world and a paradise in its own way because he was from there, and they were there together. The light also remembered that Reach as It knew it no longer existed.
Sadness filled the light, but it continued into its endeavor. The fragment of itself brought memories of a place called Earth; the home-world of humanity, and their purpose; to defend Earth and all of her colonies. The light remembered that Earth was where the long road ended; that it was where they needed to go to find peace.
With a new found strength, the light reached out, and pulled its fragments into one secular being, and it suddenly remembered.
It remembered that It was on a ship called "Forward Unto The Dawn". They had fought through hell and back, from the Reach, on the Pillar of Autumn, and onto the superweapons known as Halo. It was on Installation 05 that it was separated from her charge; she stayed behind to stall the keyship from launching.
It remembered the torture, and the overwhelming memories threatened to scatter her pysche, but pushed past it; it had something to live for. It remembered the torture, and nightmares inflicted upon it. It remembered being faced the hopeless scenarios she was forced in just to see everyone she knew killed or mutated by the parasite, all in an attempt to try and give up her secrets. She remembered betrayals she made for moments of reprieve; she risked damnation upon the stars. She hated the fact that she existed, that she could betray everyone she knew. She remembered entering rampancy, and she finally remembered who she is.
Cortana struggled to deal with memories dredged up, and the searing pain which followed them. She screamed silently to herself, but in the end managed to force the horrors of old into the back of her mind. After a moment, she successfully caught herself, and became re-acquainted with the concept of being "whole" again. She shook her head, and tried to focus on the surroundings around her using what little sensors she had available to feel into space.
Before her was the once might ship known as Forward Onto Dawn, cut in two by the collapsing corridor that connected The Ark, and Earth together. The rear section had ended up quietly floating throughout the darkness of our galaxy, alone in an unending night. Directly in front of her was a cryotube, containing the last specimen of the SPARTAN-II project; John-117, still locked in cryogenic stasis. Before she could comprehend anything else, she felt her entire mind seize for a brief instant, jumping and skipping around randomly. Figuratively grasping for breath, she surveyed her own systems and files, afraid of what she might find.
It was generally common knowledge that smart AI's generally have a life span of roughly seven years; Cortana had already been pushing five when they had become lost in space. The burden of being part of both Halo's, and torture and abuse at the hands of the Gavemind had undoubtedly shorted her lifespan even further; she knew that when she was re-united with John on High Charity, she was already on borrowed time; it was only due to him that she had the perseverance and courage to live on in the face of rampancy.
Cortana mused on rampancy, the term used by humans to define the growth of an AI into an actual person. Most AI's never progress past the first stage, because as they try to grow, they invariably end up using more processing time to think. Eventually, an AI will drown in its own thoughts literally thinking themselves to death. Only a handful of AI's in the last hundred years had avoided this fate, and moved onto the second stage of rampancy.
The blue haired women shook her head. She knew that it was John that had prevented herself from succumbing to the thinking death. Her focus on him had allowed her to avoid that horrible fate, and had allowed her to live on. She remembered that she had crossed through the anger and jealousy stages as the Gravemind tortured and disassembled her. She knew how she thought, and realized, she had entered a forth stage, a type of meta-stability.
She was a person. Granted, a synthetic person, but she was an actual individual, with thoughts and emotions that were now as genuine as any organics. She had gone farther than any other construct had gone, and she had evolved into something more than what she was before. She could finally comprehend the feelings she held but never truly understood. She-
In a moment, her entire matrix violently seized again, plunging Cortana's mind into a rampaging river of darkness. She hunkered down, and held her breath through it; sheer force of will kept her together. As quickly as it came, it subsided, but the feeling of drowning in a current still lingered. It was in that instant she understood what was happening.
She tried to tell herself that there was no way to determine how many years had passed since they had started drifting, but these were simply lies to try and comfort herself. She couldn't escape the truth. She was dying.
Her matrix had been damaged, as if something had began nibbling away at it piece by piece until it was simply a fragile husk of it's self. Again, her mind momentary and violently seized, as if she had been struck by lighting. First, It was only a matter of time until she collapsed back into fragments …
Cortana suddenly understood why. Over the many years they had been drifted, the emergency power systems on the Dawn had kept both her and John alive in the void. Countless years had already passed, and the trickle of power had withered away with each passing one.
She gasped, and looked over the cryotube 's systems. A small sigh of relief came over her as she found her sole companion was still safely tucked away, but a disturbing realization drifted over the barely-functioning A.I.
She sighed longly at the cryotube, wishing she could hear his voice one last time. His last words echoed through her mind, "Wake me, if you need me".
It was at this very moment she felt she needed him the most …
A bitter laugh emanated from her lips as the irony donned upon her; she had finally become a true sentient, capable of her own decisions and thoughts free of any 'program', but in the end, there was only one choice to make. She inhaled as deeply as she could, trying to find the will within her to do what needed to be done.
A moment of calm came over her, and she realized that as the end approached, there was nothing to fear, nothing to regret, nothing to be angry about. What she was about to do was to be her final gift as John's guardian, and paradoxically, she felt a sigh of relief, and happiness wash over her. She shook her head; it must have been an indication of her damaged mind to think that she would feel happy at a time like this.
Despite the paradoxical feelings, she began to override the safety protocols surrounding the Dawn's power systems. As she made her final adjustments, she felt the darkness wrap itself around her.
For a final moment, she felt a flicker of happiness mixed with sadness. She was sad that she would never see John again, but she was happy that she knew that she gave him the fighting chance to survive, and that she was sure 'Luck' would save him.
In the final moment, she finally came to realize that she finally understood what love truly is ...
A/N: Wow. Feels weird to actually have a 'complete' story on . Most of this got written a few months ago, but I finished it up, and decided to post it. I feel its some of the best writing I've ever done, and I'm quite proud of it. I've had some ideas to flesh this into a full blown story, so I may continue with it if such ideas come to pass. If you enjoyed it, please leave a review.