Chapter 1

"We navigate our world with the words we choose to define ourselves with. People will always say things about you. It's the way you choose to react to those words that will define who you really are."

Maya only let a handful of words describe who she really was. She was a 'baby girl' according to her mom every morning when her mom poured a stack of pancakes on her plate, and a 'trouble maker' to most of her teachers would tell her didn't hand in her homework. She was 'peaches' to Riley whenever she sat down near the Bay Window and listened to her story, and the 'world worst dancer' when she practiced that father-daughter's dance with Cory that magical evening. She let those words color her life.

But there was one color that stood out from the rest. It was her father had left it there first, and for the longest time in her life, she had berated herself for letting such a color into her life. Gray, to her, was just white tainted with black. It was a broken part of white; loss of meaning and underrated with void.

Broken.

The story of her life, really.

It was going to take her a couple of years, and a whole bunch of detours along the way, before she was going to come to peace with the grey on her canvas. But she was ready for the long journey that was waiting for her.

Bring it on World. Bring. It. On.

December 2016. Freshman Year.

"Maya. Hey Maya!"

Maya turned around to see her best friend Riley came skipping towards her through the halls. She let out a groan as she rubbed the temples of her head. "Riley. What did I say about skipping and Monday mornings?"

"That being cheerful on a Monday should be banned by law?"

"Exactly." She smiled in satisfaction. "I have taught you well, oh little one."

"I've learned from the best." She said with one of her best goofy Riley smiles. It was almost impossible not to smile along with her.

"You look like you were up all night. Again." Riley said peering at her face as they walked along the halls to their lockers. "Did you stay up all night, again?!"

"No. Yes. Maybe…" Maya let her words wander. She wanted to speak but she couldn't say the words properly. It felt like her tongue was too big for her mouth, and her thoughts were too large for her mind. She needed caffeine, badly. The lure of caffeine from the nearest vending machine started to distract her. "Ohhh…Pretty lights."

Riley stepped in Maya's ways, with a stern look on her face. "No Maya." She said as if she was talking to a child, "You're not supposed to be drinking caffeine when you have a sleep problem.".

"I didn't have any coffee today." Maya whimpered as she tried to side-step her best friend, but the stern look of determination on her best friends face told her that she needed to step up her game if she was going to get that coffee.

So she did.

"Hey look, isn't that Lucas?"

"Where?" Riley whipped her head around as she frantically searched for her boyfriend. Maya quickly took out the quarter she had hidden in her pocket and pushed it through the soda machine before Riley could notice.

"Wait a minute…" Riley turned around, her eyes brimming with suspicion, but it was already too late. Maya smiled in satisfaction as she pulled out the Blueberry Soda that came tumbling down the machine a few seconds later.

"You do know that caffeine is supposed to be bad for you."

"Shhh- Don't be so rude, Joe can hear everything."

Riley raised one eyebrow in amusement. "Joe?"

"That's what I name every caffeine drink I have." Maya said definitively. "Because I want old Joe to know that whenever I drink something else, I'm still thinking about his black murky waters."

"Joe…as in a cup of joe? Right? Please tell me we're still talking about coffee."

"Shhh-" Maya said as she put a finger to Riley's lips. "Let me carry out my ritual in peace."

"What ritual-?"

But before she could say anything else Maya opened the can of soda in her hand and started chugging down the whole thing, not even bothering to stop to care about the strands of soda that were dripping from her chin. She didn't really need to care because she knew that she had an overprotective friend who was going to do that for her.

"Have some dignity woman!" Riley said as she tried to swipe the can from her hands before Maya could inflict permanent damage on her outfit.

"Swiper, no swiping." Maya growled.

Riley looked scared. "Oh NO. I let my best friend date a tin can."

"Technically, you let me date the stuff inside the tin can."

"That doesn't make me feel any better!" She wailed as the both walked the halls.

They were lucky that they had adjoining lockers, but that was the only luck they ever encountered in high school. They had only 2 classes together; one of them being Mr. Matthew's American History class. They even took different afterschool electives! Riley had school council every Tuesday and Thursday, and she had advanced art shop every Monday and Wednesday.

Advanced Art Club was basically the only thing that she really looked forward to. The fumes of paint and the splashes of different colors were all so vibrant and welcoming, and the people there were just polite enough to keep their distance to her. There wasn't any nosy teenager looking for drama, or a melodramatic wannabe who was going to make fun of her getting excited over the paint. It was the only place that she had actually felt safe, a place she knew she could put her guard down without having to worry about anyone else in the world. It was HER place.

"Do you have anything planned for the winter holidays?" Riley voice broke through her thoughts.

"Well, let's see. I could either, to your house. Or maybe I should go to your house and have dinner. No wait-" she said as she gripped Riley's shoulder for extra effect. "I could maybe go all out with it and go to your house and watch re-runs of cheesy Disney Christmas movies starring stars that are now totally wasted today!"

"I hate it when you get sarcastic."

Maya shrugged. "Get used to me because I'll be here all day."

Maya turned towards her locker and started pulling out her books for today's classes. She was almost through shoving the big history text-book through her satchel. "You really need to tell your dad it's time he embraced the fact that E-Textbooks are actually a thing."

A prolong silence overtook there conversation. Maya looked over her shoulder in confusion. "Riley? You there?"

Maya turned around and saw the ghost of a smile etched carefully on Riley's face. Uh-oh. "Wait-" she said as she backed away from Riley, who was actually doing quite a nice impression of the Joker, "I know that look-"

She heard her back crash against the metallic locker doors. "Please don't say it. Please don't say it. Please don't say-"

"You're invited to visit my grandparent's house in Philly!" Riley squealed in excitement. "Surprise!"

"You just had to say it." Maya groaned as she banged her head against the wall.

"Oh come one Maya-" Riley said as she took her by the arm and steered her away from the wall. "It's going to be fun. Just think about it, you, me and a bunch of stars that are going to follow us wherever we go…It's going to be perfect!"

Maya wished she could see things like Riley saw things. All she could see was the two of them shivering in the cold as old Grandpapa Matthews insisted on showing them how to 'properly chop wood from a tree.'

"That was only once!" Riley said defensively after she explained to her what she saw. "Anyways- This time it's going to be different!"

"Yeah really? How?" She challenged. "Because it's going to take a whole lot more than 'singing along with Riley near the fireplace' to separate me from my TV."

"The whole gang's invited, and Grandpa said that there was a new ski lounge built near the cottage that we could visit, and and-" Riley was desperately clutching on to anything that could somehow convince Maya that spending the holidays with her might not be as terrible as it was last time.

Last time they both got colds and had to spend the whole vacation in doors after accompanying Grandpapa Matthews outdoors for one of his old fashioned night-time walks. They bruised themselves afterwards when they both thought that it was okay to go skiing even though they had a cold. The only valuable lesson that they learned was that sneezing could do wonders to your hand-eye coordination.

"Why do you need me to be there with you Riley? You'll have Lucas to keep you company." She tried to reason.

Normally Maya loved spending time with the Matthews family. She enjoyed seeing how the Matthews siblings would banter, fight, and then eventually care for each other. The love that the family showed to her was more than welcoming; it was a gift that her original family could never give to her. But things have changed. This was the first Christmas that she was going to spend with her own family, and she was actually enjoying spending time with Shawn and her mom.

"But Lucas isn't Maya!" Riley protested.

Riley was determined to bring Maya along with her. This Christmas needed to be perfect for her. This was the first ever Christmas she was going to spend being a couple with Lucas. This was supposed to be the holiday that they were going to remember for the rest of their lives; the holiday they were going to tell to their kids when they grew up! This Christmas was going to be their sappy Christmas love story, and she was determined to make every aspect of the experience perfect.

And her life was never perfect without Maya.

"Yep. Sorry kiddo. But I think I'll keep my TV some company-" Maya said as she patted Riley on the shoulder before turning around and heading towards her next class.

"Josh!"

She stopped in her tracks.

"Josh is coming too! He's going to stay with us for the entire two weeks! Two weeks with Josh! In the woods!"

Maya turned around with a suspicious glow on her face. Riley peered at her hopefully as she waited for her best friend to say something.

"When are we leaving?"

Nothing weirded Riley out more than the thought of Josh and Maya together. Even though Josh was her uncle, due to the small age difference, Riley thought of him as a big brother. And even though Maya was her best friend, there was not one moment in her life when Riley didn't think of Maya as her sister. The two together meant that her brother and sister were…together… The mere thought left cold shivers down her spine.

So she never talked to Josh about Maya. At first it was because it was weird, (hence the cold shivers). It was awkward having to watch her best friend get all giddy and giggly in her uncle's presence, and it was unearthly that she had to be the one who dragged Maya back to Earth where she was. She wanted the best for Maya, and back then she was convinced that the best wasn't Josh.

Then things changed, drastically. That day, the day the both decided to sneak out to that collage party that was the day she was proven wrong.

At first she thought that Maya was just sneaking out to prove that she could break the rules. Then she saw actually saw something broke inside of her best friend's eyes when they saw Josh and his collage friends, all cozied up in a bed. She saw how clenched her jaws were, and how red her palms were getting from being balled up into a nervous fist. She saw how visually let down Maya was. That was exactly when Riley knew that what Maya had, wasn't a crush. It was something else. They were just too young to know what that something else exactly was. From that point on, she continued to not speak of Josh, but for different reasons. She didn't want to see her best friend break down again.

Time had passed, seasons changed, and so did their emotions as well. Maya fell in love with someone other than Josh; she had fallen into a triangle. And this triangle seemingly had no angle for him. It was relief that she knew her best friend couldn't be hurt again in that way, and she wasn't going to risk her chances again by bringing Josh in the picture.

But the triangle was over, but a new possibility of Maya getting hurt by Josh had begun. And as she looked at her phone, her fingers hovering over a familiar number, she knew that things needed to change. She dialed his number and wished for the best.

He picked up after 2 rings. "Uncle Josh?"

"Hey Riley, aren't you supposed to be in school?"

Riley could hear the sound of paper crinkling and people talking in the background. She assumed that he was at his favorite IT study café, "It's 8 Josh."

"Wait. Is there something wrong?" A grip of panic started to creep into his voice. "Is everyone okay?"

"Yes. Josh. Everything's fine-" Riley said in a rush.

She could hear Josh let out a sigh from the other side of the speaker. "Okay, so why did you call me?"

"Josh… can I ask you an eetsie bitsie favor?"

"Depends on the favor."

"It's about Maya."

Silence. Another sigh; it was like he was letting out a long held breath. "What do I need to do?"