A/N: READ THIS BEFORE YOU READ THE ONESHOT. I know you all hate Shaw, but I loved him, and I couldn't resist writing this up because I had a theory that maybe Shaw was actually the good guy. Chuck and Sarah are too flawless for my taste. *shrug* Don't flame me for lovin' on Shaw - doesn't make much sense for you to if you do. But if you do feel like telling me how wrong I am, remember that this is FICTION - oh, and if you really have to yell at me, please use chatspeak. That will up my personal entertainment. Kthxbye.
Disclaimer: I don't own this.
Warning: Makes Shaw look like a good guy.
CHUCK VS. THE REVELATION
And to think: it had started out as a regular day.
It was still sunny outside, but it felt dark and stormy within the apartment. The man that sat in front of the computer screen had been seated there for nearly an hour, incredibly disbelieving. He could not see how this all worked; he simply couldn't fathom what had gone on. How stupid they had all been…
And now?
Now he was dead.
Memories rushed back like lunch threatened to rush up. From the instant Chuck Bartowski knew who Daniel Shaw was, he'd hated him. Shaw had always been just too perfect. He was a lot like Sarah in that way: if Chuck thought about it, neither of them really had any personality. They compartmentalized that and stored it away, along with everything else they loved and feared and despised. It was something Chuck had never quite been able to manage.
But Shaw seemed to know everything, seemed to have a grip on everything. Chuck had done something stupid, not unusual, and Shaw forced him to try to deal with it on his own, when Sydney Prince and her four goons had showed up at the Buy More. Shaw had pushed Chuck to become the spy Chuck had always wanted to become. Sarah had only pushed Chuck back, for his own protection, and Casey hadn't cared enough to do anything at all. Morgan, of course, hadn't known, and Ellie hadn't, either. Devon had, but all he'd wanted was out of the loop – he was awesome at everything but lying.
Chuck saw the scene on the bridge again like it was yesterday. Shaw had pushed Chuck to become the best spy he could the only way Shaw knew Chuck could – for Sarah. The only way Chuck could have ever possibly shot to kill would be to save Sarah. Shaw was the only one who saw that.
Did it make any sense at all for Shaw to try to kill Sarah? No, definitely not: Shaw understood that there was a rogue CIA agent somewhere that had ordered Sarah to kill Evelyn; it was old news. Did it make any sense at all for Shaw to try to exact revenge on Chuck afterward? No, not at all, not unless he woke up one morning and decided I think I'll go on a random killing spree and shoot up some Bartowskis today! And of all companies to join that were not the CIA, did it make any sense whatsoever for Shaw to join the company that had ordered the murder of his wife?
No – none of it made any sense at all.
As Chuck saw this, it hit him, hard. Shaw had fought Chuck up until the end, and because Shaw had been so stubborn, he had brought the Elders of the Ring right into the waiting hands of the CIA. By becoming an Intersect and nearly defeating Chuck, he had given Chuck all the glory.
The damn guy was like Superman.
Chuck buried his face in his hands. Why now? Why would Shaw decide to give up the charade now? Chuck knew that Shaw was dead by this time – he couldn't have survived all those flashes, especially not for an entire year. The Intersect deteriorates the brain when used without the help of the Governor Chuck's father invented. Chuck still could not understand how this had worked in Shaw's mind.
And then he realized that Shaw had always wanted to die.
Shaw had walked around like he was lifeless, looking cold and heartless. He had dark hair that could've passed for the shade of a Grim Reaper's cloak, and hard wooden brown eyes that betrayed nothing but the emptiness of a dead man. Shaw had wanted to die from the moment he knew Evelyn was dead, and that was all there was to it.
Chuck thought that maybe Shaw had decided that suicide was not the way. Maybe Shaw didn't actually have a black hole instead of a heart: maybe his heart was so shattered and so broken that it didn't bother to put itself together again and instead asked him to do what he could before the inevitable end came. Shaw must have seen it all coming. Shaw must have known that half the world wanted him dead, and he must have known that it was going to have to happen soon. So Shaw took out as many of the bad guys as he could and thrust up as many of the good guys as he could.
It made sense. It all made a deranged sort of sense.
And Chuck hated it.
He had to decide if he would tell Sarah – Sarah Bartowski, as of late. But Chuck didn't want to tell her this. He didn't want to dredge up the past yet again. Perhaps Beckman had already gone to Sarah to tell her, had already broken the news that the guy they all hated? He was dead and he was worthy of a hero's costume. The guy who they'd thought had no moral compass? His moral compass had pointed north all the time.
Maybe Shaw had even understood. Maybe he'd found something in what he'd done that Chuck hadn't been able to find. Chuck thought people were supposed to be nice to each other and all – the Golden Rule crap – but maybe that something Chuck had always been searching for? Maybe Shaw had found that something.
Maybe Shaw was with that something now, watching Chuck.
