Nick Fury was dead. Really dead. Stabbed right through the heart, but death was no stranger to me. I had been around it my whole life.
When my best friend fell off that helicopter I told myself I wouldn't let anyone else die because of something I did. I guess I broke that promise.
I had watched Natasha as she had wept over his broken body. I had seen something in her eyes that awful day. She didn't say the words but I saw them, "How could you let this happen? How could you let us down like this?" Tony pretended he wasn't affected but we all knew. He was probably thinking the same thing. They all were.
It's probably a good thing that I can't get drunk because right now I would be wasted.
Fury was killed by a rogue mutant who called herself Strike. She had an entire posse of followers. we were winning then she showed up in the helicarrier, the last place we thought she'd be. Plunged a knife through him. She should have lost the fight. I was distracted by what her crew was attacking. I thought that S.H.I.E.L.D could hold her off. That was my mistake. One of those things that so many people didn't think I was capable of making.
The death was five weeks ago. This was the first Avengers' meeting in over a month and I'll admit it, I was nervous about how the team would react to seeing me again. Yes. We haven't seen one another in five weeks. I missed them. Actually missed them even if it meant they were going to tear me apart in there.
For a long time, Avengers' Tower had been home to me. Now stepping inside the foreboding column of steel and glass was like turning myself into prison. Of course I was the last one in. It wasn't too hard to figure out they were just talking about me. All my friends, the people I cared about the most sitting at that table where we had made countless decisions and battle plans.
"Hi, guys." I said with a weak, grim smile.
They barely acknowledged. I was surprised that Tony and Thor had showed up. I sat down slowly. Bruce's eyes never left me. I couldn't help imagining myself being thrashed like a ragdoll by that green, raging monstrosity inside of him.
I spoke first which was probably not a good idea, "I know it's been a while and nothing's really . . . normal anymore." I paused. "No amount of apologizing or killing or grudges is going to bring him back."
I didn't need to say the name. They all knew. "Fury died believing in the Avengers. He's the one who brought us together! All we can do is respect what he left behind. Keep up the job he gave us. The mission he taught us to believe in."
They were expecting me to give some rousing speech. I'd probably end up doing that anyway. That's not what I meant to do but name one thing that happened exactly how the Avengers meant itto happen.
"We can't just give up when it gets like this. People die. It doesn't matter. It doesn't change anything. Look at us. At you! We're Earth's Mightiest Heroes. We have a promise to uphold. This planet isn't just our home. It's our responsibility." I hadn't realized that until I said it.
The team seemed to agree, nodding their expressions grave. The news of what had happened on the helicarrier had settled on my namesake country like a rainstorm. S.H.I.E.L.D hadn't even tried to try to confidentiate the files concerning Fury's death. The agents had known that the data couldn't be guarded. It was one of those things that people just . . . knew. Whether or not he would be missed by those outside of the circle was superfluous. It didn't matter. "I don't blame you, Steve." Bruce stated, quietly.
I blinked. Was it that obvious that I thought he blamed me? "You've been acting edgy since you walked in here. And everyone else picked up on it too." he said as if he read my mind.
"I do not see why it should be your burden to bear. If anything we should be looking to strike the mutant-witch down." said Thor raising his fist to emphasize his words.
There was a chorus of enthusiastic agreements. "Of course we want to take down Strike. That's obvious. And I don't get where you got the idea that it was you're fault in the first place. It sounds like you blame yourself more than we blame you." Natasha's words were truthful and confident.
I wasn't showing how relieved I actually was but I could feel it in my pounding heart. The team would stay together and they were still my closest allies. "We're gonna get this chick and you're gonna lead us the whole way." chipped in Sam "Falcon" Wilson.
"Nick Fury needs avenging and we're the Avengers." I said.
All the memories I'd made with these six amazing individuals. I had trusted Tony Stark, Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, Bruce Banner, Thor, Wanda Maximoff, James Rhodes, and Sam Wilson with my life. I remembered looking into Barton's eyes during the battle of Loki, as it was so-named, and seeing nothing but malice during his possession. It had killed me to fight a teammate even if we were just forming a team bond. Of course that was a long time ago and we knew each other better now.
I felt a strange protective sensation over them. One I started to feel shortly after I became heir commander. I have to be careful though so they don't think I think them vulnerable. I had only felt it with one other person. My only lover who is now dead. Just like the director of S.H.I.E.l.D.