Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to people who are not me.

HI I'M STILL ALIVE.

Life's been rather brutal these past two months, but I dedicated NaNo this year to Dragon Eclipse and I've written about 25k words just for DE's main timeline already. I've also done some work on the two AUs that I have, Shattered Eclipse and Dragon Flaps Its Wings, along with this semi-fluffy piece of feel-good parental!Kisuke taking care of an issue he has. The idea behind this piece is dedicated to Girl-of-Action, who really wanted to see Mayuri get his due via Kisuke's hand.

This piece stands alone, so long as you know the basic outline of DE - Kaito came back in time, got adopted by Kisuke, and then charged into Hueco Mundo after they returned from invading Seireitei and murdered Aizen. How it happened, what happened to the Hougyoku, and so on really doesn't matter, just that these things have been resolved and everything is peaceful again.

Kisuke stared down at the sleeping form of his (adopted) son, a thoughtful frown tugging at the corners of his lips. The boy had returned, exhausted and half hysterical, from killing Aizen and making sure nothing the man had been working on was capable of coming back to bite them in the ass. Kaito had told him about the encounter, about how many of the Espada had agreed to leave the Human World alone, and about his bargain with one of them for monthly spars.

What the boy hadn't said a thing about was the fate of the Hougyoku, beyond that it was 'taken care of'. Kisuke had his suspicions though, and if it was true he didn't know whether to be happy or to shake the idiot boy until some sense was rattled into his thick skull.

"It's over," Yoruichi spoke softly from her perch atop the desk that took up one corner of the room. "He actually did it."

"He did," Kisuke murmured, a bit surprised at the way the words roused both pride and despair in him. He knelt and ran the back of his knuckles lightly over Kaito's face, smiling in amusement as the boy wrinkled his nose, grumbled unintelligibly, and rolled over onto his side while pulling the blanket closer. It was adorable, and Kisuke had to restrain himself from continuing to poke the boy just to see if he would continue to make noise; after all, Kaito deserved his rest after everything he'd been through, and there would be other times that Kisuke could be an insufferable parent.

Instead, he rose to his feet and quietly left the room, sliding the door closed after Yoruichi exited as well. He paused in the hallway, head tilted back and gaze blank as he considered everything that had happened. Being a parent had never been on his mind, even if he had taken Ururu and Jinta in as soon as he realized their potential. And now he had a son, in name if not in actual fact.

"Kisuke?"

"He's still not safe," Kisuke reminded his old friend. He'd known from the minute that Kaito had broken down and told him how he'd come to be that the boy would never be safe. Kisuke couldn't be everywhere at once; he might pretend to be all knowing, but that was a lie that Aizen had gleefully destroyed with nearly every act the traitor did.

While Aizen was still a threat, Kisuke had pretended it was alright; at first because he honestly hadn't cared for Kaito beyond the use the boy could provide, and later because to reveal otherwise was to invite a fight neither could afford. The most he could do was teach Kaito to stop and think, to consider the results of his actions, and the boy was taking well to the lessons. While he regretted the path his other self had chosen and the effect it had on Kaito, Kisuke couldn't find it in himself to wish it otherwise; Ishida Uryuu was a prideful, arrogant idiot of a child, as different from Kaito as night from day.

But now, looking at his son's — fuck the 'adopted' label, Kaito was his — sleeping face, knowing everything the boy had already be through, Kisuke was finding himself… less content. There was nothing he could do about the prejudice of the Shinigami, no matter the slow progress Kurosaki Ichigo was making with his charisma and blunt nature. It wouldn't get better overnight, but there was hope for the future in that matter.

Already he had received a message from the Soutaicho, a pardon and invitation to resume his Captaincy combined. It had been the work of minutes to dash off a reply — 'thanks but no thanks' — and send it back with a happy grin. Kisuke preferred his freedom, preferred the way no one was breathing down his neck or ordering him around, and wouldn't trade this little shop and his little family for the world.

Which just brought his mind back to the danger looming over his son's life.

Kurotsuchi Mayuri. Perhaps one of the gravest mistakes that Kisuke had ever made, second only to the cluster of mistakes that led to making the Hougyoku and falling into Aizen's trap.

That insane soul had, according to Kaito, experimented upon nearly every Quincy soul that crossed over into Soul Society. The torture and torment that Mayuri forced upon people simply for the powers they were born with was nothing that Kisuke approved of. And to think, he had released that monster from the Nest of Maggots, thinking that he could be used.

No more, Kisuke promised to himself, as he strode away from his son's room and into his own. He would not allow that monster to remain alive for another day, a looming threat over his son's life with every minute that passed. Because eventually it would come to the surface that Kaito had Quincy powers, and then Mayuri would become curious.

Kisuke pulled his futon out from its storage closet, dropping it in a heap on the floor at his side, and then reached deep into the closet. Tucked away in the far corner was a clever little release, requiring both his reiatsu signature and a certain pattern of touches, which promptly clicked open to reveal a shallow hidden compartment.

"I hope this still fits," Kisuke told Yoruichi, while reaching into the compartment and pulling out the folded clothes that lay on top. He shook out the shirt and held it up, examining it for a moment before holding it against his torso and doing a rough check. "It's been a while since I've needed these."

"It has," she told him solemnly, as she hopped up onto the folded futon and stared at him with an emotionless gaze.

Kisuke couldn't tell what she was thinking, how she felt about him taking up his previous skills once more, but her lack of protest was a good indication of her opinion. Under her unblinking gaze, he pulled off his jinbei and started to redress in the shadow-colored outfit, making sure to settle each piece in place before picking up the next. Luckily, everything seemed to fit even after so many decades, and it all moved with him no matter how he stretched, twisted, or bent to check the fit.

"How do you intend to get in there?"

Kisuke glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, then turned his attention back to the final details of the outfit. Soft jika-tabi for stealth, ties to keep the bottom of his pants from moving or catching on things, gloves and more ties on his arms for the same. Then the last bit, the mask and hood that hid his distinctive hair from the world. A bit of blackening around his eyes to break up the appearance of his skin and he was nearly unrecognizable.

"Stealth," Kisuke replied while checking his reflection, taking in the monster that stood in his place. Already he could feel himself closing off, settling into the mindset of an Onmitsukido member who would do anything to complete his mission.

Yoruichi jumped down from her perch and strolled over to his side, settling down next to his leg and staring at their reflections. "They'll sense your arrival and departure."

Kisuke shook his head and reached back into the compartment to pull out a necklace and dangle it at his side so Yoruichi could investigate. "Not if it's a legitimate arrival."

When she knocked the pendant out of his grasp and crouched over it to investigate it more closely, Kisuke turned back to the hidden compartment and began to arm himself. Kunai were tucked away in various pockets, a few shuriken followed for good measure, and two little kakute vanished into a hidden pocket in his obi along with a small wrapped package about the size of a spool of thread.

Benihime grumbled faintly in the depths of his soul, disliking that he was once more taking up weapons other than her, but Kisuke could also feel her rising interest at his actions. It had been a long, long time since he'd taken to these tools, and she was a bloodthirsty blade. She knew her physical form would be left behind, but the promised bloodshed appeased her in return.

"Be safe, Kisuke," Yoruichi finally murmured, right before he swiped the necklace from her and slunk out of the room.

Kisuke hadn't expected her to follow him. As much as she cared for Kaito, this mess was because of him and his actions, and it was his duty to clean it up. Yoruichi remaining out of it was her tacit agreement that he was still capable of solving his own problems.

Down he went into the training room, grabbing up the reiatsu concealing cloak and triggering the pendant as he did, before tucking the cloak away in a pouch and the pendant under his shirt. His illegal gate opened at his command, and a little Hell Butterfly fluttered out, drawn by his altered signature. He would need to perform a bit of… cleaning… after his mission was complete, but for now the pendant altered his signature to match some no-name Onmitsukido member that was a decent physical match to him.

He slipped into Seireitei like the ghost he had once trained to be, through the Onmitsukido's private Gate and past the handful of guards who didn't even glance at him. It was child's play to glide through the shadows, slipping past wandering patrols and the occasional late-night reveler. No one even glanced in his direction, not even the Captain he crossed paths with. Little Byakuya had grown up powerful, but had centuries of practice ahead of him before he could pinpoint an Onmitsukido member on a mission.

Kisuke came to rest right outside the Twelfth and began to evaluate the protections around it. He almost laughed bitterly at the way his hidden safeguards remained intact, but bit his lip and simply exploited the holes he had placed there over a century ago.

Up and over the wall in a blur of shadowed motion. Freeze at the base. Breathe. Evaluate.

Nothing had triggered. How… unfortunate.

The compound was nearly empty, most of the members long since gone to their rest. Only a skeleton crew remained to man the equipment and monitor any volatile experiments. Kisuke ghosted through the building, searching out his target with a single-minded intensity that he'd buried deep in his soul the moment he'd stopped being summoned to take missions.

Mayuri was predictable. Holed up in a room filled with machines and tubes, clearly working on some experiment or another. Alone.

Under his mask, Kisuke smirked darkly. Used the sound of shuffling papers to mask opening the door a small crack. Gathered himself. Leaped.

The door crashed open with a bang. Mayuri startled, dropped his papers, reached for his blade. Screamed as Kisuke landed atop him and brutally slammed kunai after kunai through his limbs, pinning him to the floor while muffling any further sound with his free hand.

"Now, now," Kisuke spoke silkily as he knelt over the pinned monster, eyes glittering with glee as the other writhed in pain. "Let's not draw the attention of others, hmm?"

Carefully, he lifted his hand away from Mayuri's mouth, wanting to see what the man would say.

"Who— who are you?" Mayuri snarled, pain driving a sharp edge into his voice. "I'll have your head for this! No one will ever see you again, and then I'll deal with that useless bitch you call a commander!"

"Oh dear, we can't have that, now can we," he replied with dark amusement, drawing out the little wrapped package from his obi and holding it up between two fingers. "Interesting that you should mention having my head… I think I rather like that idea. For you."

Mayuri paled and froze, staring at the object and then up at his captor, terror in his gaze.

"Have I hit the nail on the head, my dear Captain?" Kisuke purred, before he checked the room briefly for cameras. He already knew he'd need to erase every bit of evidence after this was over, and if he was going to go through that trouble… Well. Prudence and his training was telling him to simply kill his target, but it was so much more satisfying to see him writhe in terror. Before his training could kick in, Kisuke reached up and tugged his mask down, freeing his lower face and allowing a few strands of blond hair to tumble free.

"You!"

"Me, indeed." He smirked down at the fury that was starting to build in Mayuri, twirling the little package between his fingers. "I decided to come and… correct a few mistakes I made."

"Why?!" Mayuri snarled, rage overcoming his fear. He started to struggle once more, before giving up with a moan of pain as Kisuke drove another kunai through his shoulder. Mayuri still had the energy to speak, however. "Angry at me? At my genius? At how I succeeded you?"

"Oh no, no, not at all," Kisuke replied lightly. "No, if you were anyone else, I would tell you to enjoy the hell that Captaincy is. I prefer my freedom, thank you very much."

"Then why?"

Kisuke leaned forward and bared his teeth in Mayuri's face, letting the monster get a glimpse of the monster that lived in Kisuke's own soul. "Because you were looking at something of mine, and I. Don't. Share."

Confusion crossed Mayuri's expression, followed by dawning understanding of how badly he had screwed up. "That boy, the interesting one that claims to be an Urahara… he's actually yours?"

"But of course he is! I would have thought his appearance was enough of a clue, but no… he told me how you looked at him. How you made comments about experiments on him and Kurosaki." Kisuke smirked at the horror that was starting to spread across Mayuri's expression. "So I decided to… clean up my last great mess. After all, I'm the reason you're free."

"You can't put me back!" Mayuri cried, terror rippling through his voice and expression at the very thought. "I know you can't get into the Nest anymore! They won't let you put me back in there!"

"Who said anything about putting you back? I plan to end you," Kisuke said with dark glee, before his hand darted forward quick as a snake, shoving the little package into Mayuri's mouth the moment the other went to speak again. A quick touch of reiatsu, and he was scrambling backwards to escape the explosion that followed.

"Should have thought that through a bit more," Kisuke muttered with a scowl at his blood and brain-splattered clothing. He grimaced and pulled his mask back up, making sure to tuck his hair away completely, before moving to the console that was near him. The recordings needed to be purged, every trace of his entrance needed to be scrubbed clean, and his escape needed to be prepped. After that, there were a few remaining loose ends to deal with here in Seireitei before he could return home. Home, to his family and his friends. It sounded… good.

Kisuke settled down at the console and quickly broke through the oh-so-clever security measures that Mayuri had set up. Really, the idiot wasn't as much of a genius as he pretended, Kisuke mused as he purged evidence from the system and set up a trigger to not record the fluctuations of his escape from Seireitei. Any half intelligent person who knew Mayuri could have broken through his security.

No one came to check on the murdered Captain, despite the noise the altercation had produced. In fact, no one even came down the hallway he was in. Kisuke was allowed to complete his goal in peace, finishing with a kill-order to the back-up bodies that Mayuri had grown in a hidden room elsewhere in the compound. No sense in tempting fate, after all, and there was no sign of one of them having woken up. Which meant that Kaito had been right; blow the idiot's brains up and he couldn't resurrect himself.

Content with his work for the night, Kisuke rose, gave his clothing another disgusted glance, and made his way out of the compound as stealthily as he had entered. It didn't matter that he was leaving a bit of a trail here and there, because his next act would make the idiots that ran this place stop looking for a culprit.

It was harder to infiltrate his next destination, but his changed reiatsu signature helped with that. The little nondescript apartment showed very little personality, which thankfully meant that there was nothing in the way of his silent progress through the place. He slipped a kakute onto his finger and triggered the poison stored within to coat the two little needles.

Standing over the sleeping man, Kisuke said a quiet apology in his head before reaching out and almost gently pressing the poisoned needles into the man's exposed neck. He died swiftly, cleanly, without even waking up.

Now came the hard part. Kisuke stripped his dirtied outfit off and carefully dressed the now deceased man it it, one piece at a time. He was pleased that none of the blood had soaked through to his skin, as that left one less mess to handle. A few final touches to make it look like a proper suicide — propping the other up against the wall and slipping one of the man's own kakute on his finger after triggering its poison — and he was done.

No one would question the suicide, Kisuke knew. Because the murder of such a high profile target would look bad, and a suicide would mean that no information could be gained from the killer. There would be doubt, and questions, and Yoruichi's poor little protege would be watched carefully for a time, but nothing would come of it. Just another rogue agent, gone insane under the stress of the times and wanting to preemptively take out a dangerous target before the target rebelled just like three other respected Captains already had.

Now the only thing he had to do was escape, and he had only a limited time to do it in before his careful manipulation of the recording system silently deleted itself and allowed the real system to take over again.

Taking care to leave little trace of himself, Kisuke dressed himself in one of the man's spare uniforms, making sure to take an equivalent number of weapons as what he had started this mission with. He then draped his reiatsu concealing cloak over his shoulders and tied it closed. The pendant was deactivated in order to end the man's trail here, and Kisuke ghosted out of the apartment and across the sleeping city in a blur of silent movement.

Kisuke pried open the trapdoor to his hidden training ground and dropped down into it, pulling the door closed behind him. The concealing properties of the place meant he could trigger another illegal gate without anyone noticing, and the program he set up would make sure nothing was recorded in the Human World either. He raced through the dangai, not bothering to find a hell butterfly to lead the way.

Kisuke emerged into the air over Karakura, the first glimmers of false dawn on the horizon. He took a long moment to just breathe, pulling down his mask and hood and reveling in the gentle breeze and the knowledge of what he had just done. His son was safe. Safe from bastard scientists and monsters with god complexes, and Kisuke would cheerfully commit murder again and again to keep it that way.

He didn't take off his cloak until he had landed in the courtyard in front of his shop and walked through the doors. His silent footsteps took him down the dark hallway towards his room, everyone still asleep at this early hour.

Yet as Kisuke neared Kaito's door, he couldn't resist. He slid the boy's door open and padded into the room in order to kneel at Kaito's side, watching his son's peaceful sleep in silence.

Kaito shifted, made a noise, and cracked one eye open to stare in sleepy confusion. "Father..?"

The word pulled a smile to Kisuke's face, and he reached out with an ungloved hand to gently comb it through Kaito's hair. "Forgive an old man his worries, son."

"Tch," Kaito mumbled. He rolled back over onto his side, putting his back to Kisuke. "Aizen's dead. Espada're dead'r scattered. I'm home safe. Lemme sleep."

Kisuke chuckled, ran his hand over Kaito's hair once more, then stood. "Oh, alright. I'll even let you sleep in today. Just don't expect this every day!"

"G'way," Kaito mumbled into his pillow. "Too early fer this."

He left his son to his rest, assured that the other was still there, was still safe, was still his. Kisuke yawned havily as he padded into his own room, already stripping off the stolen uniform and folding it to be put within the hidden compartment.

"Well?" Yoruichi asked, emerging from the darkness of the hallway and into the grey almost-light that was starting to creep into his room.

"He'll never bother anyone again," Kisuke told her with a cold smile, as he closed the compartment with a soft click and piled his futon back in place. There was no point in pretending to sleep at this hour; he had survived plenty of all-nighters in the past, one more wouldn't be the death of him. Instead he just pulled on yesterday's outfit and resolved to wash himself off before others woke.

"Good. He should never have risen to the position he gained," Yoruichi informed him coldly.

Kisuke ran a hand down his face, sighed, and shrugged. "I know that, now. And I've corrected my mistakes."

Yoruichi gave a quiet meow, then hopped up onto his shoulder and sprawled out with a wide yawn. "With that settled, I have a craving for milk that I believe you can satisfy."

"You know, you could just transform to pour it out yourself?" Kisuke attempted to suggest, though he still turned to head to the kitchen.

"Where's the fun in that?" she asked with a haughty sniff. "I'm a cat for a reason, Kisuke, and that involves being able to sleep whenever I want, being waited on hand and foot whenever I want, and being carried anywhere I want."

"Lazy."

"Earned laziness, thank you very much!"

Kisuke barked a laugh and shook his head. Things were finally looking up, and for once he was no longer waiting for the ax to fall.

Maybe he should think about some sort of vacation for all of them? It would be a nice way to relax after everything, and surely Kaito deserved some relaxation after everything he'd been through. It would serve to help the boy settle back into a relatively peaceful life after the knife's edge he'd been walking for months.

Yes, Kisuke decided, as he poured some milk into a saucer for Yoruichi. A family vacation sounded like just the thing.