Well, hello there, everyone, here is Saint with a small 'Christmas Gift' for all my readers :3!

This is, basically, a 'recycled' version of an idea I had long ago and wrote back and forth with a friend in simple, silly and short messages, and in 'stage play format', but that I decided to give a chance to make this and give everyone some laughs in these dates of festivities OwO

Basically, it's a complete parody/AU with the SAO characters in a plot of one of the most known and loved/hated genres of manga-anime ever known…Magical Girls :D

Who hasn't ever watched, enjoyed and/or cringed at the adventures of schoolgirls changing into frilly dresses that poor disguise their identities and going off to fight evil, usually of magical origin, while also dealing with their day-to-day problems? Well, this story is basically a parody of all the tropes you would see in all the different types of such shows, from the influence of the most classical ones like Sailor Moon to some of the darkest ones (But almost none, thankfully) like Madoka Magica…but, you know, with the SAO cast, and made more for shits and giggles than anything else OxO

Now then, enjoy this short one-shot if you must, dear readers, and also enjoy, through it, of the best and most sane character in this story…the Narrator XD!

Warning: This story contains extreme amounts of silliness, OOC and a small bit of Fanservice. You have been warned :P

Disclaimer: Neither Sword Art Online nor its characters belong to me, as much as I wish otherwise. All Magical Girls-inspired ideas that anyone recognizes also belong to their rightful creators XP


[Fairy Savior: Guardian of Lovely Dreams!]


Act 0: I never asked to be a Magical Girl! The Guardian of Love is Born!

It was a dark knight over Japan's skies (Because, you know, these things always happen in Japan). Everything seemed peaceful and silent…unless one took into account the sinister, malevolent, and, yes, clearly evil and monstrous figure flying through the clouds, or the small and shining form it was chasing, which also tried to harm it with strange energy-blasts coming from the bright rapier on her hands.

The smaller form, a young girl of 17 years with pointy ears and long chestnut hair, was having very little success in doing so, the frilly white and red dress she wore mostly destroyed and filled with gashes, the few parts of light armor that completed her outfit completely shattered and clear exhaustion visible in her eyes and stance, the clearly unnatural and fairy-like wings on her back moving slower with each second.

As if it had been waiting for an unseen cue, the clearly evil being chasing the obvious defender of justice laughed evilly, with a dark and sinisterly generic voice.

"Muahahah! It's over, 'Mighty Flash'! Your days as a 'Guardian' and a thorn in our side end here! Surrender and perhaps we will give you a quick death when you tell us where the Legendary Sword of Light is!"

"Kuh…never! You evil monsters will only win and bring about your nefarious plans over my dead body!" defiantly roared the chestnut-haired girl to her demonic enemy, even if internally she knew how screwed she was.

After all, talks and shouts about fighting for love, justice and all that was right in the world were good for motivation, yeah, but she had learned very early into this 'work' that they didn't translate into instantaneous recovery spells or unexpected power-ups, as manga had led her to believe.

To put it simply, she had no strength left, no way of escaping her foe, was tired as hell and had no time left to think. At this rate, she would be caught and the valuable info she had gotten would fall into the hands of the forces of evil, with none the wiser to stop the sudden boost in their nefarious plans…

"Then you shall fall fighting, human! Muahahahah!" laughed some more the monster as it shot towards the girl called 'Mighty Flash', easily evading her clumsy attacks.

In that moment, the chestnut-haired girl took a decision. One that, unknowingly, would decide the destiny of the world as everyone knew it…

How shocking, right?

"Yui-chan, I'm sorry…but at least one of us needs to keep going." softly muttered the rapier-user to someone only she could hear, shaking her head as if to deny whatever 'she' said. "No, it's the only option…sorry. I, Yuuki Asuna, am terminating our Contract."

Those words said, and even as the dark and evil figure loomed over her, the girl reached for the strange tiara she wore over her head and, without hesitation, tore the strange and tear-shaped blue-jewel embedded in its center, turning around in mid-air and throwing it away, the gem falling through the clouds.

A smile appeared on her face as she stopped hearing a certain voice, even as her 'magical' form vanished and left only a normal teenager in her place, with no rapier, pointed ears…or wings.

She would have fallen to her death if, ironically, her evil and nefarious enemy hadn't caught her in that exact moment, its massive hands covering her whole form and, apparently, too busy laughing and feeling victorious to notice what had just happened.

"Got you! Muahahah, the master will reward me greatly!" boasted the dark creature as it started to vanish through a suddenly appeared dark portal, the chestnut-haired girl still tightly gripped in his hands.

As she vanished into the darkness, one last thought managed to make its way through Asuna's mind.

"Good luck…Yui-chan…"

Down below, on the ground…a random man carrying a bunch of cheap plastic jewels in rings, necklaces and earrings of all kinds sneezed, letting his bag fall to the ground and spill its contents all around.

"Goddammit!" cursed the man while falling to his knees and quickly reaching for his wares, eager to not lost any in the dark grimacing at noticing how some of the cheaply-stuck jewels had separated from the accessories they were supposedly attached to.

He never noticed how, behind him, a certain bluish gem fell from the heavens, bouncing a couple times before rolling beside a currently jewel-less ring and, without apparent reason, losings its unnatural glow, making it seem just like all the other fakes surrounding it.

And so, Destiny started moving forward…


5 days later, on a certain Middle School…

The sound of the bell signaling the end of classes was like music to the ears for all the young teenagers within the classroom.

"…and well, that's it. Congratulations, starting next year you will all be High Schoolers. You should be proud of yourselves, kids…and now, go and enjoy your summer vacations!"

Not even a second after the teacher had said those words did most of the people in the classroom cheer and shot from their seats while hastily grabbing their bags, eager to head back home and enjoy the freedom of their last summer before high school.

Of the few students that hadn't run off like inmates from a high-security prison being told they were free, a certain 15 years old girl sighed as she calmly finished putting away her things, a tired look on her cute face.

"Damn…shouldn't have come so early for one last 'super extreme' kendo practice with the club…" muttered the girl of bluish-gray eyes, passing a hand over her dark hair as she tiredly stood up, the school uniform hugging her, ehem, 'surprisingly developed' body in a very interesting way. "Thank God for summer vacations, but I feel as if I could fall down and die on any moment…I will take hours to even arrive at the gate…"

"Hey, Kirigaya?" suddenly called out a random and unimportant female student, who was looking out of the window with blinking eyes. "Isn't that guy in the gate your older brother?"

No sooner had those words escaped the girl's lips did what seemed like an inhumanly fast blur shot past her, out of the classroom and into the hallway, going down the stairs faster than some of the athletic clubs' stars.

"…and there she goes." muttered another unimportant girl while shaking her head and grabbing her bag.

"…I thought she was dead tired?" confusedly asked the first random classmate while sweatdropping.

"And she was…until her brother showed up." sighed the second girl while exiting the classroom. "Better if you don't ask."

In that moment, heading towards the gate…a certain boy with glasses was looking to the sky with determination in his eyes, a closed fist at his side.

"Okay Shinichi, be brave! Today is the day…before summer vacations start, you will tell Suguha-chan how you feel!" mentally screamed the determined boy, turning around…in time to see the form of a certain girl running out of the school building like a living bullet, an eager smile on her face, making him freeze and his eyes to widen as he tried to smile too, only managing a nervous look. "A-ah! Ki-Kirigaya-san, hi the…!"

"HiNagatakunGoodbyeSeeyaNextYear!" quickly shouted the girl without slowing down, shooting past the bespectacled boy without slowing down and sending him crashing to the ground face first.

…I hope you didn't think much of this character, because we are not seeing him again in this story. Poor him.

Meanwhile, just when there were barely 10 meters between her and the school's gate…the girl stopped, coughing in her hand and making sure her hair and clothes were in order before straightening her bag and calmly walking forward while humming a happy tune with closed eyes, the perfect image of someone who had been doing that since they exited their class.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is Kirigaya Suguha, our protagonist and, believe it or not, the only hope of this world.

"Hey, Sugu!"

"Ah! Onii-chan? What a surprise!" exclaimed the young girl with 'total surprise' as she opened her eyes, seeing how, standing not far away from her and garnering his fair share of looks from the retreating students, a black-haired and black-eyed boy a year older than her was waving her way while leaning on a simple-looking motorcycle, smiling warmly at her.

The uniform he wore and the bag in his back identified him as someone from the High School not far from there.

"Heheh, yeah, sorry about that, I just wanted to surprise you by taking you home today. It's the last day of school, after all." awkwardly replied the boy while scratching the back of his head.

This is Kirigaya Kazuto, everyone, our main character's older brother…though technically, they're cousins. You see, the boy's parents vanished mysteriously when he was young (A plot point that I'm sure will never be relevant to us at all!), so his mother's sister adopted him into their family. Despite this, Kazuto loves his adoptive family very much, caring for his parents and little sister as much as any boy who prefers playing videogames over anything else would do.

"Yo-you didn't have to bother, but thank you…" softly answered Suguha at his declaration with a dreamy tone and a blushing face, imagining a shining and glittering background behind Kazuto's form.

…also, did I mention that the girl has a VERY obvious crush on him since forever? Obvious for everyone except him, I mean, as the boy is denser than a freaking rock.

"Well, in any case, I'm already here." stated the gamer while mounting the bike and putting on a helmet, turning to offer another one to his adoptive sister. "So, shall we get go…?"

"I'm ready!" happily replied Suguha, making him blink at noticing how, in the span of a second, the girl had grabbed the helmet from his hand, put it on and sat on the bike behind him, hugging his back a bit too tightly for 'security'. "Are we going home, Onii-chan?"

Barely suppressing a chuckle at his little sister's word, Kazuto nodded before staring up the ending and driving off, enjoying the feeling of the ride through the familiar streets of Tokyo.

The girl behind him, meanwhile, enjoyed the feeling of her beloved's warmth as she hugged his back and sighed happily. She never noticed that, in her hurry, she had forgotten her kendo shinai in her classroom.

Barely 10 minutes later, the siblings' ride stopped as they descended from it besides a mid-sized 2 story home, which seemed nice and very spacious. Certainly, more than a family of 4 would need, at least. It even had its own in-home dojo, for God's sake!

"Ah, home sweet home. It always feels different at the end of a school year, don't you think?" happily commented the young kendoka while, reluctantly, moving away from her adopted brother to stare at their home.

"Heh, kinda…by the way, Sugu, this is for you." casually commented the gamer while grabbing something from his bag and, to the girl's surprise, bringing a small package enveloped by brightly-colored paper on his hand, which he offered to her. "I was thinking of getting you something since you got your grades, but I thought it would be more fitting giving it to you today. Congratulations on finishing Middle School!"

"O-Onii-chan…you didn't have to…" muttered Suguha while grabbing the small gift, internally squealing happily at getting a present from her beloved brother. Eagerly, she tore apart the small package…before gasping in shock at seeing a silver ring with a tear-shaped jewel of a dull blue color on it, the thing somehow seemingly absorbing light instead of reflecting it. "Ah…ah…"

"I know it's not much, really, but I saw it yesterday and, well, I thought it would really suit you." explained the black-haired boy while scratching the back of his head once again. "Hope you don't mind it's not an actual jewel, but still…"

"OMG Onii-chan gave me a ring! A ring! A RING!" were the mental shouts exploding through the dazzled girl's mind as she gingerly put on the accessory, looking at it with hazy eyes and not hearing anything Kazuto was saying at all. "I-is this an indirect?! Is he implying something?! Because if so, YES I DO, ONII-CHAN!…n-no, wait, calm down Suguha, take a deep breath and count to 10, this is just a harmless gift, nothing more…yeah, that's it, now just smile and tell him how much you lov…!"

"Sugu?" the question bringing her out of her mental delirium, Suguha blinked and noticed that the gamer had, at some point, left her behind and headed towards the now open door, his confused expression revealing he apparently thought she was just behind him. "Are you coming or what?"

"A-ah, ye-yes, sorry!" shouted the blushing teen as she rushed after her 'secret' crush, hearing him chuckle as they entered.

…the last hope of this world, ladies and gentlemen. Can anyone else feel how screwed we are?


Meanwhile, in a dark, mysterious, and totally Evil place…

Within the darkness, creatures of evil plotted and schemed…

"What do you mean her 'Contractor' is GONE?!" shouted a hooded figure with outrage, the monstrous form that some days ago had been chasing the mysterious 'Asuna' now lying half-dead on the floor beside him. "How the fuck could you capture the Mighty Flash and let her damn magical partner escape?! Are you retarded or what?!"

"So-sorry, boss…" pitifully moaned the evil monster while twitching. "I-I got too caught up in the moment and…didn't notice it…"

"I should kill you where you stand…do you know what will happen if the higher-ups get word of this?! They all think we killed the damn Mystic Being! Hell, that Oberon bastard is probably too busy interrogating the Mighty Flash to even care, but if any of those three discovers it and reports to the Emperor…"

"Uhm…Kuradeel-sama?" asked a goblin-looking creature of darkness, the clearly evil minion seeming hesitant about speaking in that moment. "We detected something that may be important…"

"What now?!" snarled the now identified Kuradeel while turning around, glaring murder at the non-important minion.

"Th-the signal of a Contractor in an 'inactive' state, sir!" squeaked the being while taking a step back, even as his humanoid superior's eyes narrowed in curiosity. "We detected a vague signal of Positive Energy vanishing in the area near where the Mighty Flash was captured; s-so we think it may be the same one!"

"Do we have its' exact location?" questioned the dark being while walking forward, towards a sinister-looking altar in one end of the evil room.

"Ne-negative, boss. Just the general area where it may be…"

"That will have to be good enough. Besides, with the Mighty Flash out of the picture there shouldn't be any more Guardians near the Tokyo area for now…" as he uttered those words, malevolent power seemed to ooze from his hands and into the altar, a strange 'portal' burning into existence over it. "I can't allow anyone to discover this or I'm screwed, so I will just have to hope the Contractor gets destroyed while we pretend it's just another normal 'incursion'! Now…come forth to clean this mess in my name, Illfang!"

With an inhuman roar, a dark being answered from beyond the darkness.

…and these are the bad guys. Well, at least one of them…maybe we still have some hope, after all?


It was already 9 in the night when Kirigaya Suguha entered the bathroom with a content smile, undressing as the bathtub finished filling itself with perfectly warm water.

Releasing a content sigh as she submerged her well-developed body into the water, the young kendoka gazed happily at the ring on her finger, which she hadn't taken out before getting in for…some reason.

"Onii-chan's most precious gift…I will never ever take it off." whispered the 'innocent maiden in love', explaining the senseless reason of why she was bathing with the ring still on.

Normally, one would think Suguha would have gotten discouraged or grown out of what many would have called nothing more than a 'childish crush' over the years, especially given that the object of said feelings was her 'brother'…but that wouldn't be farther from the truth.

The girl had been in love with Kazuto for a long time now, and nothing had ever made those feelings waver in the slightest, in fact, they had only grown with her as she became more and more aware of what she felt towards the black-haired boy.

Besides, there was nothing wrong with her feelings! In Japan, cousins could date and even were allowed to marry each other! And that was exactly the happy future she imagined for her and her dear Onii-chan…if she ever managed to get through that thick skull of his and get him to notice her feelings, that is. On the bright side, that also guaranteed that it was nigh-impossible for any unknown hussy to steal HER brother away from her, but, in hindsight, that fear may have been a bit too exaggerated, given Kazuto's retracted attitude, preferring to relate with people outside the school more through his computer than in real life.

It wasn't as if the boy was some kind of heroic chick-magnet or anything like that anyway…

"…one day…I will be brave enough to tell you what I feel, Onii-chan." swore Suguha while closing her eyes, softly depositing a soft kiss on her ring's jewel, blushing and squeaking internally at imagining doing the same to her beloved's lips…and blinking in shock when the gem started to shine with unnatural light. "Wha…?"

Suddenly, the tear-shaped crystal no longer looked like the cheap imitation it was 'supposed' to be, but more like a truly invaluable jewel…which 'opened' and changed shape, like a flower blooming, leaving the figure of a fist-sized and yawning little girl with fairy-like wings floating over the frozen kendoka's hand.

"Munyaaa…man, that was a long nap. Never want to go through that again…" muttered the Pixie-like girl while blinking the apparent sleep away from her eyes, her long black hair flapping from side to side before she settled her gaze on the open-mouthed Suguha. "Ah…hi there, Kirigaya Suguha! Thanks for awakening me! I'm Yui!"

"…ah, gah, little girl…small…floating!" came from the shaking and wide-eyed form of the black-haired girl, who was now pointing at the supernatural creature as she stood up and backed her full body against the bathtub's wall.

"Ouch…no need to act like you had seen a ghost, you know?" deadpanned the now identified Yui while pouting and crossing her arms. "I was just trying to say hello! It was tiring being trapped in my fake form until your burst of Positive Emotions managed to break the seal!"

"My what…?" muttered the confused kendoka before her eyes widening, remembering how she had just kissed the jewel. "You mean…?"

"Yep! Your pure feelings towards your dear 'brother' managed to wake me up! Let me introduce myself again!" raising a hand 'epically', a shining background appeared behind the suddenly grinning pixie. "My name is Yui, a 'Contractor'! I'm a Mystic Being from the Magical Realm that has come to the human world to take part in its defense against the evil force of the Nether Realm! And you, young girl, shall be my new partner to become a 'Guardian' that protects the world!"

"…what are you talking abo…? No, wait, before that, get out! I'm naked here!" half-shouted the blushing girl while covering herself with her arms, before freezing as a certain part of what the 'Mystic Being' had said hit her. "Wait…how did you know…about Onii-chan…?"

"Oh, about how you love so him much it's almost scary?" smiled the winged girl while floating upwards. "That's easy! Since the moment you put on my 'ring', I have had a direct connection with your soul and emotions, so I have been able to 'read' everything about you and your secret fantasies and desires like an open book!"

A second of silence ensued.

"…whe-when you say that you read 'everything'…" started a gulping Suguha with a suddenly nervous tone, shakily pointing towards Yui while her mind resisted the urge to panic. "D-do you mean…?"

"Yep. EVERYTHING." confirmed the Pixie while smiling her way and wiggling her eyebrows in a very suggestive way, making the young kendoka pale. "All of it."

The following scream echoed through the entire Kirigaya house, making Kazuto (Who had just finished preparing dinner) to stiffen in shock.

Worry filling his heart, the boy threw away the apron he had been wearing over his clothes and rushed towards the house's bathroom, praying that nothing bad had happened to his dear little sister as he all but kicked the door open.

"SUGU! Are you o…?!" and that was as far as the gamer went before freezing at the scene before his eyes.

Basically, it was that of his little sister standing up in the bathtub, in all her 'not-so-little'-glory, while having her hands closed around something she was apparently trying to crush and shaking it from side to side, doing…'interesting things' to her water-covered body.

"Aaaaah! Forget all of that, forget it, forget it! Do you hear me?! Forget…!" the screaming girl stopped her shouting without warning, frozen mid-step as, slowly, her eyes moved towards the paralyzed form of her adopted brother, who was standing in the doorway and staring at her with wide eyes, a blush slowly creeping over his face. "O…Onii-chan…?"

"Ah…uhn…I…I thought something happened to you and…ehm…you have grown up a lot lately?"

In answer to his intelligent words, Kazuto received a shampoo bottle to the face at neck-breaking speeds, making him stagger and fall forward to the ground, unconscious.

"O-ONII-CHAN, PE-PERVERT!" shouted Suguha even as her face seemed about to spontaneously combust, somehow having reddened all the way to her neck. "I-It's still to-too early for you to…! …wait, Onii-chan? AH! Onii-chan, don't die!"

"…well, at least you stopped trying to kill me." commented Yui as she watched the naked girl run to her unconscious brother's side, making a mess of the floor with all the water in the process, thankful of having been 'freed' the moment the young kendoka threw that bottle at him by reflex. "I should probably consider better what I say to emotionally unstable teenagers when they see me for the first time…why don't I ever learn…?"

"Thi-this is no laughing matter, yo-you weird creature-thing in the shape of a little girl! My Onii-chan is hurt!" screamed the desperate girl while shaking the unmoving Kazuto, probably hurting more in the process. "Wha-what should I do?! What do I do?! Do I call an ambulance o-or do I try to give him first aid myse…?"

"Yeah, before you keep harassing your unconscious cousin while naked, could you please form a Contract with me, and fast?" nonchalantly asked the Pixie girl while floating nearby, making Suguha stiffen at noticing just how her current position would look to any outsider. "I'm detecting the energy of several minions of the Nether Realm descending into the area and I would prefer to stop everyone around here from dying before you try to reenact any of your most forbidden fantasies…"

"Waaah! I told you to forget about that! And also, I would never take advantage of Onii-chan while he is…!" once again stopping herself mid-phrase, the young kendoka blinked as she stared towards the floating mystic being. "Wait. What was that part about things coming and people dying…?"

On cue, as if they had been waiting for said question to be asked, a 'hole' in reality opened in the middle of the air several streets away from the Kirigaya house, several dark and evil dog-lizard things emerging from it followed by a dark miasma that quickly spread all around.

Immediately, people inside their houses fell unconscious in the middle of whatever they were doing as the darkness covered their houses, unable to resist as it started to 'drain' something from them…

And then, with an unholy roar, a pair of shiny eyes opened as a last, imposing figure emerged from the portal before it closed behind him, the 2 meters tall form of the strange dog-lizard hybrid laughing sinisterly, his reddish fur and some parts of grey armor giving it an even more unnatural and demonic look as it wielded a humongous bone-axe in one hand, the leather shield on his other limb also seeming big enough to crush a normal person in one go, his tail crushing a nearby car as if it was made of paper.

"Go forth, my minions! Spread the Negative Miasma, and don't leave even a single of those humans uncovered! So orders your leader, Illfang the Kobold Lord! Muahahahahah…!"

Back in the Kirigaya's house, a now thoroughly freaked out Suguha was staring wide-eyed out of the bathroom's small window, seeing the strange 'black mist' spreading everywhere in the distance, strange and monstrous shapes moving through it.

"What the hell is going on?!" shouted the young kendoka while turning to look at Yui in a panic, the Pixie now seeming actually worried.

"They must have somehow detected my sleeping energy and tracked me to this area…but they haven't found me yet, so there is still time!" determined, the mystic being floated before the black-haired girl's face, making her flinch. "Quick, we must form a Contract now! The only way to stop them is if you become a Guardian!"

"Wait, wait! I'm totally sure of what you're talking about, but essentially you want me to go out and fight those…things?! Are you insane?! I will die!" was Suguha's terrified answer as she rushed for a nearby towel. "I need to call the police, or the army, or something…!"

"That won't work! Don't you think anyone else would have tried already if it was possible?! Hey!" despite her protests, Yui saw how the girl continued ignoring her and finished wrapping the towel around her body, making her grow desperate…until her eyes shot to the unconscious form on the bathroom's doorway. "…you know, if you don't stop them, they will get your brother too."

THAT finally seemed to stop the young kendoka dead in her tracks, her gaze shooting towards Kazuto's unconscious form before moving towards the ever-growing black mist beyond the window and, finally, to the serious-looking Yui

"…what do you mean by that?"

"Well, the Nether Beings' plans aren't exactly beneficial for you humans, if you must know, so I wouldn't be surprised if, left unchecked, everyone in this area that wasn't able to run away ended up de…" the small Pixie was interrupted when the black-haired human grabbed her and brought her body to her face, an uncanny serious look in her eyes.

"What do I have to do?!"

"…heheh, that's the spirit!" grinned the mystic being while being very careful of not letting any smugness at her victory appear on her face, even as her body started shining with an unnatural light, making Suguha squeak. "You have more than enough Positive Emotions inside you to fill me up, so let's go! Say your full name out loud!"

"Ki-Kirigaya Suguha!" half-shouted the girl with determination after giving a last glance to her unconscious brother.

"By the Authority granted to me by the High Council of United Realms, I hereby declare you a Guardian, Kirigaya Suguha!" spoke Yui with a powerful voice as the young kendoka felt something connecting to her, like an invisible link joining her and the small Pixie together and…"Now, it's Transformation Sequence time!"

"…eh?" was all that Suguha had time to think before Yui once again turned into a jewel embedded in her ring and, suddenly, words that weren't hers escaped her mouth as her body also seemed to move by another's will.

"Contract Ignition! START!"

The moment those words were shouted, everything around Suguha seemed to be replaced by shining lights of all colors, even as 'ribbons' of energy shot out from the ring in her hand and enveloped her body as she spun in the air, fantasy-like music seemingly echoing into the background.

Weaving around her hands and feet, the shining energy became white fabric, going all the way to half the forearm and a bit over the waist respectively, gentle greenish lines decorating the even as white 'shoes' completed the clothes on the legs.

As the girl's arms spread to the sides, the energy engulfed her breasts and neck and waist in a way most would have called 'provocative', before fading into small 'pops' of shining dust and turning into a mostly white and green outfit with skirt, which for some reason saw fit to expose part of her lower chest, bellybutton and a good amount of cleavage, decorative green and yellow pieces emerging from the part covering her neck to hang diagonally over her breasts, even as an actual and beautifully tied ribbon grew from it.

Suddenly, as she opened her mouth and gasped softly, the young kendoka's hair seemed to shoot behind her and at her face's sides as it shone like the sun, growing like a golden cascade until it fell down her back, before a white cloth-piece in the shape of an open flower materialized into existence and, somehow, tied her now long blonde hair into a ponytail, two smaller pieces binding her bangs into smaller ones at her face's side, while her ears grew pointed and elf-like.

Finally, 'Suguha' opened her eyes, now of a vibrant green color, as a tiara manifested around her head, Yui's shining crystal now in the center of it, even as her hands shot outwards and grasped a long and beautiful green wand with what seemed like a butterfly on top, see-through fairy-like wings growing from her back the moment she grasped it.

Then, for no apparent reason, the newborn Magical Girl spun in place and struck a 'cute' pose, winking to no one even as the music and shining background seemed to reach their climax.

"Fairy Savior Leafa, Guardian of Lovely Dreams! Ready for action!" happily proclaimed the now dubbed 'Leafa' before she blinked in shock several times, quickly squeaking and hugging herself (Somehow not dropping the want while doing so) and blushing fiercely. "Wha-what the hell?! Why did I do THAT?! That wasn't me ta-talking or moving!"

"Eh, don't worry, it's just a thing that happens every time a Guardian transforms, unimportant gimmicks." waved it off Yui's voice, which the shocked 'Guardian' realized she could now hear inside her mind. "Now quick, we must hurry 'Leafa'! Those Nether Beings aren't going to defeat themselves…! At least I don't think so, the ones that were that incompetent died earlier in the war, I think…"

Ignoring the mental ramblings of the mystic being, Leafa the Guardian gave her brother's sleeping (Unconscious) face one last look before clenching her fist and, without hesitation, shooting towards the bathroom's window…and almost crashing painfully outside because her wings got stuck on the small frame.

…the hope of survival for this world keeps getting darker by the minute…


Illfang the Kobold Lord thought his luck was looking great. He just had to do an easy job for that creepy guy of Kuradeel and he would get a great reward, not to mention probably an elevation in his rank in the Nether Army. After all, he only needed to 'harvest' a mid-sized area, with no Guardian reported anywhere nearby. Simple and clean.

At least, that's what he thought before the first waves of wind energy shot like green energy balls and crashed against some of his minions, vaporizing the minor kobolds that were spreading miasma through the street.

"Wha…?! Who dares…?!"

"I dare, you oversized…dog-kangaroo thing!" shouted a certain and clearly unsure voice, making all the Nether Beings look up in time to see Leafa's form hovering in the air near them. "I'm not letting you kill everyone in the neighborhood, you weird monsters!"

"A Guardian?! But there wasn't supposed to be any nearby!" evil eyes narrowed, Illfang suddenly seemed to grin as he realized something. "Ah, I see…if we have no info about you then you must be a newbie! Hah, today is your unlucky day, human! Your career as a Guardian will never get farther now that you face me, the great Illfang, the Kobold Lord! You will not stop us from spreading the Negative Miasma through this entire area!"

"…yeah, now that you say it, is there any particular reason why you are just, you know, throwing black mist all around?" questioned the obviously confused girl while looking around, making the massive kobold blink in surprise. "I mean, I was expecting you and your monster-friends to be around destroying and killing things, but you're just…spreading that weird smoke around…"

Silence ensued, through which one of the kobolds tried to subtly move closer to the floating Guardian with his sword raised, and received a wind sphere-trip to oblivion as reward.

"…how the hell can you be a Guardian and don't know this?!" shouted the, for some reason, clearly outraged kobold lord. "Just how long have you been in this?!"

"Not even 5 minutes, to be honest." sighed the blonde 'fairy' before her eyes moved towards the gem in her tiara, completely ignoring the gaping looks she was receiving. "Yui-chan?"

"Yeah, sorry, should have explained that, but there was no time. You see, the Nether Beings are creatures of darkness that feed on the Negative Emotions you humans produce, just like we Mystic Beings feed on the Positive ones. In the past, this wasn't a problem for anyone, as we all received our fair share from your species…but then one day the Nether Emperor decided that was not enough and decided that they would take all the Negative Emotions they wanted, and for doing so, they started a nefarious plan!" dramatically narrated Yui from inside the jewel, everyone paying her utmost attention (Kobolds included, despite they knowing this as much as someone religious knows the bible). "Using their Negative Miasma, they would drain all humans from their Positive Emotions so that only Negative ones remained and then take over your world, thus making them invincible!"

Another moment of dramatic silence passed.

"…really?" deadpanned Leafa with clear disbelief, as if she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Eh? Uh, yes?" answered the confused Pixie from inside the jewel. "And that's why several of the Realms united against them, then sent specially chosen warriors, us 'Contractors', here to Earth, to join forces with humans we chose to fight them off (Because we can't use our own powers here in your world), and we have been at war since then, as Guardians are immune to the effects of the Negative Miasma…"

"That's…the most stupid thing I have ever heard!" shouted the blonde Guardian to the heavens, ignoring the affronted 'HEY!' coming from Illfang and his minions. "And I used to watch Sailor Moon when I was little!"

"Wha…?! This is a serious matter, you know?! They're trying to conquer your world!"

"Yes, yes I got that, but I just can't take seriously the idea of an inter-dimensional monsters' group that is basically trying to 'drain all happiness from the people' to try and take over the planet." confessed the fairy while facepalming with her empty hand, ignoring the metaphorical punch she was giving to the kobolds' self-esteem. "Nor the 'good magical beings' that supposedly are here to help but, judging as none of this is on international news and the army isn't going crazy, apparently can only do so by giving superpowers to teenagers and fighting some secret war that has been going on for who knows how long. It's like the plot of some 3rd rate Magical Girls show…but for real."

"Gah!" squeaked Yui while metaphorically flinching, given that she couldn't actually do so in her current form.

Did this girl just reject the meaning behind their centuries-old struggle by using cold and indifferent logic?! Where was her childish fantasy or inner innocence, dammit?!

"…you know what, fuck it. I'm not sitting here hearing you say all that anymore…I didn't understand most of it, but I'm sure it was insulting." growled the Kobold Lord (While giving everyone a good idea of his intelligence level) before pointing at the resigned 'Magical Girl' with his axe. "Kill her, my minions!"

"…see? I can't even take that threat seriously now." sighed Leafa while nonchalantly moving out of the way, her wings, well, easily allowing her to keep out of the ground-bound kobolds' reach. "And oh God, these guys are as useless as the typical minions in fantasy anime are too…"

"Thi-this is no time to be letting your inner child die, we have to fight!" mentally shouted the panicking Yui, keenly aware of how the Positive emotional levels of the girl were descending. "If you don't then they may kill us!"

"Yeah, but…" as she said this, the newborn Guardian easily evaded the Kobolds' clumsy attempts at hitting her by, genially, throwing their own weapons at her, she easily counterattacking with wind spheres of her 'magic wand' and blowing several of them up. "These guys are so sad I'm massacring them just by waving this thing around. It almost makes me feel like a bully or some…"

"DIE!" surprisingly roared Illfang by appearing behind the blonde fairy, her eyes widening in shock as she barely evaded being cleaved in half by his axe.

"Kyaaa!" screamed Leafa as she flew upwards, away from the evilly grinning monster. "I-I didn't even see him move!"

"Not good…her senses are dulling and her powers decreasing together with her Positive Emotions! This is very bad! We ARE going to end up killed at this rate!" wildly despaired Yui while racking her brain to try and find a solution to their predicament, even as the Guardian's clearly awkward wand-swings proved to be ineffective against the faster Kobold Lord and his shield, and she once again evaded death-by-big-ass-axe by a hairbreadth.

Dammit, she couldn't go out like this, not when she still had the mission to rescue her old partner…and because she didn't want to die too! Besides, she surely could find a way out of this; she hadn't gotten her Contractor License just by having a cute face, after all!

…well, technically that was just because she cheated on the Exams to become one, but still!

The evil laughter of Illfang was starting to crack down the last of her nerves when, suddenly, inspiration struck her at remembering how she had managed to get her 'partner' to fight in the first place.

"Kuh! Okay, this is bad, this guy may actually…!"

"You know, Suguha-chan? I think you're underestimating how terrible their plans are…" casually commented the mystic being while the blonde fairy dodged a shield-bash by miracle.

"What?! This is not the time to be thinking about their stupid plans, I am…!"

"I mean, look at this way." continued Yui, nonchalantly interrupting her outraged Guardian. "Is more than just 'happiness' they want to get rid of. If there are no Positive Emotions…then there won't be love either." the Pixie-turned-gem had to resist the urge to mentally grin smugly at seeing Leafa freezing in place at her word. "And without love, your cousin will never return your feelings, right?"

"I finally got you, annoying Guardian!" roared Illfang in triumph while jumping at the blonde fairy with his axe raised. "Prepare to meet your…!"

CLANG!

The confused Kobold Lord blinked, trying to understand what the hell was happening, even as he saw the Guardian's wand stopping his bone-axe while being gripped in one hand.

His mind was still trying to process the impossibility when greenish 'flames' of energy erupted from the blonde girl, surrounding her as they would a shonen protagonist as the shine in her wings increased, her eye snapping open and glaring at him like two burning emerald fires.

"How dare you threaten our worlds, you lowly beasts of the Nether Realm!" shouted Leafa to the four winds even as Illfang started, to his shock, being overpowered as the girl's suddenly abnormal strength pushed him back. "In the name of all that's right in this world, I'm going to kick your ass and make you wish you never threatened my feel…I mean, this world!"

"…man, I'm good." congratulated herself Yui as she saw the squeaking Nether Being disengaging and jumping backward. "Still…woah, this girl has it REALLY bad for her not-brother, eh? Hmm…perhaps I can use that to my advantage a bit more…"

"Woaaaaah!" screamed the blonde Guardian while raising her wand, which started to shine and, to everyone's utter shock, shift shape. "Awakening! Mystic Wand, change to Battle Form!"

Suddenly gripping the wand with both hands, Leafa swung it down as it 'opened', exploding from within with unreal power as what was left in the Guardian's hands was a mighty-looking sword, hilt of a dark color while the guard and hilt's tip were of a dull golden, the blade burning with an orange color that reminded of the rising sun.

"Fairy Cutter - Alfheim!" the blonde fairy's words, her new blade's name, echoed through the area, filled with a power that seemed to push back the Negative Miasma around them. "…awesome. Even if I have no idea of how the fuck did I do that."

"Wha-what?!" screamed Illfang, suddenly panicking. "Wasn't she a newbie Guardian?!"

"Holy shit! Did she just awaken her wand's Battle Form in less than 20 minutes?! Even Asuna took a whole week of training to do it!" mentally gasped the shocked Yui while staring at the sword in awe. "Unbelievable…I may have hit the jackpot with this girl, after all!"

"You're mine!" shouted Leafa while flying forward like a comet towards the Kobold Lord, easily cutting apart the suicidal kobolds trying to stop her and save their leader as if they were made of paper. "Oryaaaa!"

"Do-don't get cocky, humaaaaan!" replied Illfang while meeting her charge head on, bone-axe meeting fairy blade…and breaking apart, the Nether Being's weapon unable to withstand the mighty power of the newborn Alfheim. "Gaaah! N-no way! Are you kidding meeee?!"

"This is it!" roared the Guardian while turning around, even as all remaining kobolds tried to dogpile her at once by jumping off nearby rooftops at her. "Out of my way! Wind Cutter!"

True to her words, blades of winds were formed by her perfect and well-practiced (As only someone who had spent most of her life practicing kendo could) slashes, cutting all the charging Nether Beings apart and letting them dissolve into gory darkness.

"Grrrr, I won't fall to the likes of you, Guardian!" screamed the bigger Nether Being while throwing away his shield and gripping the blade that he had been carrying on his back, unsheathing it to reveal the curved edge of a giant nodachi. "Behold my Kobold Blade! And now, succumb to my most deadly attack!"

"Watch out, Leafa!" warned Yui to her partner as the girl turned around, eyes narrowing at the glowing sword on her enemy's hands. "He's doing something big!"

"Perish under the might of my deadliest technique!" roared Illfang as he, suddenly, started jumping all around like a kangaroo on a sugar high, becoming faster with each rebound. "Super Hyper Kobold Mega Jump Attack!"

"…okay…that actually was too silly for me." deadpanned Leafa while staying still as the screaming form of the demonic and evil being descended over her like an unstoppable avalanche. "If you're going to use an 'ultimate attack', at least give it a less stupid name…" suddenly, the Guardian's blade shone with emerald light, her eyes burning with the same color as she raised it over her head with both hands. "Like this. SYLPH SLASH!"

With a mighty shout, just as the Kobold Lord's attack was about to connect, the blonde fairy swung down, blades and power clashing with the roar of steel.

For an instant, everything was silent…and then both Illfang and his blade were perfectly bisected by Alfheim's might, the gleaming fairy sword and her owner's serious face being the last things the wide-eyed Nether Being would ever see.

"N-noooooooo…!" screamed (Somehow, despite his throat, mouth and tongue having been cut in half) the Kobold Lord as he bled gory darkness for an instant before dissolving into nothingness, leaving only the silent night and the victorious heroine behind.

Immediately, the Negative Miasma filled the area started vanishing, for no apparent reason, leaving the humans around unconscious but back to normal, and also making others question the intelligence of linking your evil-spreading-thing directly connected to the one spreading it.

"That…was…awesome!" shouted Yui with excitement while Leafa sighed, looking around as if trying to convince herself she hadn't just dreamed all of that. "Girl, you have a hell of potential as a Guardian! Where did you learn to use a sword like that?!"

"I practice kendo…" muttered the blonde Guardian while looking at the sword in her hands, which shone and returned to the form of a wand, its energy seemingly spent. "I even got into the nationals a couple months ago…"

"Oh, that's cool…that explains why you're so good!" praised the Mystic Being with a wide mental-smile, already making many plans for the future in her head. "I'm looking forward to working with you from now on, partner!"

"Eh? What are you talking about?" asked the confused girl as she crossed her arms under her breasts. "I'm NOT doing this again, ever."

"…what?! Bu-but, you accepted the Contract! We are a team now! Wha-what about protecting the world from the Nether Beings?!" shouted the horrified Yui, mentally seeing all her plans crumbling down.

"Well, there are other Guardians out there, right? I don't see why I have to do this when I never even wanted to in the first place! I have way more impotent things to do with my life that being some crazy Magical Girl that fights against monsters for no reason!"

"Yo-you can't say that! Think of all the people you saved tonight! Like your bro…!"

"AH! Onii-chan! Oh God, I left him unconscious in the bathroom!" screamed Leafa before turning away and flying back to her house at full speed, ignoring her the mental pleas of her 'partner'.

And as the newborn Guardian flew away, under the light of the moon, a new legend to decide the Fate of this world and all Realms connected to it, started…

"…shit, Illfang is dead." muttered Kuradeel once he felt the presence of his minion vanishing, sweat covering his face. "…o-okay, calm down, me, as long as no one knows of this, I will be fine! I just need to make sure this new Guardian is dealt with before she attracts any attention…"

Meanwhile, on a darkened room in a sinister place…two figures sat around a table, one of them looking bored as he played with his knife and the other staring silently ahead through the red lenses of his skull-mask.

Suddenly, a new figure wearing a dark cloak and hood entered the room, a sinister smile being the only thing visible through the darkness shrouding most of his face.

"Oh…sup, boss? Anything interesting going on?"

"You could say that, Johnny. It seems poor little Kuradeel has been keeping some secrets to himself…"

"Hmm…then maybe we should go to 'see' what he's doing?"

"You took the words outta my mouth, Xaxa. After all, as I like to put it…It's showtime."

Somewhere else, a girl of long chestnut hair lie inside a golden cage, chained to the ground but glaring defiantly at the darkness surrounding her, from where annoyed voices could be heard.

"…she still refuses to talk?"

"I'm afraid so, my lord. But do not worry, sooner or later, she will cave in. All humans do, after all…"

The girl, for her part, had only one thought in her mind.

"Yui-chan…I hope you're safe!"

At the same time, flying over the Japanese countryside, a petite female with a strange dress and cat ears looked around, the massive blue dragon she was riding turning to look at her with apprehension.

"Something…wrong…partner?"

"Ah, no…I just had this weird feeling, as if something big was going to happen…but let's not dwell on that! Onwards, Pina, we will arrive at Tokyo in the morning!"

"As you…wish…"

Far away, through the empty streets of some small village, a Tengu-like Nether Being screamed in fright before his head exploded like a water balloon, the powerful bullet that had destroyed it vanishing in mid-air before it could damage anything else.

In a roof almost 1 Km. away, the blue-haired figure that had done the deed lowered her massive rifle, the pink-haired one with a hammer that stood behind her whistling in surprise.

"Man, you just keep getting better, eh? That was one hell of a shot!"

"…it's no big deal. Besides, if I didn't have you to cover me in close range, I wouldn't be able to snipe them so calmly."

"Heh, always trying to undermine your value, when will you learn…? Oh, also, good job to you too, Hecate!"

"Thanks, Liz-san. Shall we get going?"

"Yeah, I think there are no more around here. Let's get going, Liz, Urd."

"That's the spirit! Right, partner?"

"Hmm, tonight surely has been a fruitful endeavor…"

And as all these events took place…in the alleys of the big city, people suddenly found themselves feeling afraid, angry or depressed as they crossed over certain dark areas, quickly recovering when they moved away, but leaving with them a sensation of helplessness and fear that would take a while in vanishing, none of them ever coming back near the area.

Skulking among the shadows, the all-black creature floated in silence, a hint of desperation in his movements as he stared at the passing humans with his golden eyes.

"No…not either…dammit!" growling, the being smashed his claws against the wall behind him, quickly retreating back into the shadows, actually sinking in them. "I need to find someone compatible with me…quick…"

The first pieces were moving. The board was set.

But who would stand victorious at the end of this deadly 'game' between Light and Darkness? The answer…was a tale still not told…

…also, can I please become the narrator of another world that looks less likely to be totally doomed? Please?


[To be Continued…?]


Author's Notes: Yeaah, most likely not. Or at least not anytime soon XP

Hi everyone, and thanks for enjoying (If you did) this crazy piece of madness I wrote. If you disliked the over-the-top silliness or such, don't worry, as I said, this is just a One-shot for now, and I have no plans of continuing it for now, at least not until I finish my other SAO fic (Requiem Universus) and have given a good work to my pending one (One Punch Gamer's sequel, 'Chains of Fate', that shall go into the Alicization Arc!).

Still, as you can see, I have already left the plot established, so if anyone is interested in taking over or continuing this pseudo-parody, just tell me and it's all yours :3 The base of it is, as you may have noticed, to parody and make fun of most of the Tropes seen in Magical Girls' series, subverting some with logic and playing others straight through silly and strange (Sugu being 'forced' by the magic to do the typical Magical Girl 'pose') or scary (The Nether Being's plan sounding stupid when said aloud, but they being actually ready to kill for it, and the consequences being obviously much darker if they were allowed to happen) explanations.

Plus, is a total AU, so some fun with the characters' changed background should also be good (The Kirigaya live in Tokyo here instead of Kawagoe, Kazuto has known he's adopted from the beginning, Sugu is much more, ehem, 'into' him, Asuna is a badass in real life, Yui isn't a sweet little girl but a manipulative magical creature, etc) :D

Also, if anyone is interested in how 'Guardian Leafa' looks, just take a look at the cover image of this fic, then add the tiara with the 'Yui Jewel' (Which, if it wasn't obvious, is the same one in which Kirito turns her in canon when she 'dies', to preserve her data) and the wings! Also, 'Fairy Cutter Alfheim' is basically the blade in her hand there too :P

Well, that's all for now, my friends! Hopefully you enjoyed this short piece of madness :) Have a Merry Christmas (Or whatever you celebrate) and Happy New Year, everyone! Also, if you're SAO fans and play the videogames, don't miss the latest trailer of the upcoming 4th one, the epic crossover 'Accel World vs. Sword Art Online: Millennium Twilight'! It looks fucking awesome!

Till next time, I will see you on the end of Requiem Universus' second arc, this is Saint, signing off!