As I said, this is my first (possibly last) Fire Emblem story...I've only seen bits and pieces of Radiant Dawn but I've watched youtube clips (it's sad, I know...) of other conversations from other games. I'm anxious to know what the Fire Emblem fandom is like and what you think of the story! -sweats- I've only ever encountered anime fandoms before...I'm both excited and fearful...in any case enjoy this whim of a tribute to Ike and Soren. :3
It wasn't you; it was me.
That's the only answer I can come up with from here, this point, this time, this place.
This void.
I've lost everything but what I used to think was most important and I've found that logic is cold. Not an escapable cold like a blizzard or a brief cold like a morning shower or a quiet cold like trying to fall asleep in too thin sleeping gowns. Cold like the faces of bodies leaking souls with the tears and rends made by you.
It is my fault. It was my shortcomings. It was my task and my failure; I failed logic, logic did not fail me.
That's the only answer I can come up with from here, this bed, this night, this late.
I am the problem because logic has always worked before, with me or without me, I am the error because logic has always been enough before, you were alive before, with or without me.
I think of the plan (my plans always worked before) and I remake it again and again as I lay alone trying to fall asleep in too thin sleeping gowns. I make a list of unknowns and knowns, of the capable and incapacitated, of the objectives and the results, and I add them all up like I always have and get nothing. The paper wads of failed corrections bounce against my skull but I try again. And again.
I feel cold.
There used to be a place I could escape to and feel warm that was never very far and always very quiet.
You were always very quiet.
I heard nothing, but I knew; it was silent, but I turned; I should have watched my front, but there was not a single noise inside me so I knew something was wrong. I should have watched your back but you told me to watch my own. I could have watched your back but you told me to watch my own. I would have watched your back but you told me.
You spoke more words than I had ever heard you say so I listened and I obeyed.
And you are needed.
I am not.
Logic will always work, with or without me.
I felt cold. I met you. I feel cold.
It is familiar but uncomfortable and I have nowhere to escape to now.
I did not know I was cold before because I had never been warm. I did not know I was trapped before because I had never been free. I did not know I was alone before because I had never been in love. I have two answers and neither one makes me warmer:
1.) Love.
Love does not make sense. You weren't the brightest but I could have never predicted love from someone who lives by breaking bodies. (My face is cold).
Therefore, it follows that:
2.) It wasn't me; it was you.