A/N: Hey everyone! So I've had this whole cheesy story stuck in my head now for a while, and I finally found the courage to share it. I hope you enjoy :)

It was about mid-afternoon when the Commander and her generals arrived at Camp Jaha. The weather was pleasant so that Lexa was comfortable in the formal armor she was wearing. She felt her horse huff beneath her and patted him on the side of his neck.

Approaching the fence that surrounded the Skaikru's camp, she glanced at the Trikru tents surrounding the Skaikru's settlement. She had told a number of warriors to stay there before she left for TonDC and protect the camp from any possible attacks or intrusions. Although that was the reason she had given her warriors, she had also wanted them to stay close to the Sky people to encourage their interaction. They were allies now, they had been for a quite some time, and Lexa wanted to keep it that way. After the fall of the Mountain, she did not plan on leaving the Skaikru to their own fates and pretending the alliance never existed. She did not plan on leaving Clarke like they had never known each other. The blonde leader had given too much for the alliance, and Lexa respected that. She was even impressed by it. Clarke had fought, bled and killed for her people and for this alliance.

The reason Clarke had given Lexa for the alliance no longer existed: the Mountain had fallen and both their people were freed. But the Commander felt the need to keep the Skaikru and specifically Clarke close, for reasons that might have been too close to her heart and too far from her head.

But Lexa's people had not complained, apart from Indra's disagreeing glances and occasional advice, and Lexa figured that her people had come to respect Clarke as much as she did. She and the Skaikru had proven themselves well in the war against the Mountain.

The gates were already halfway open when Lexa rode in on her horse. She dismounted and one of her warriors took her horse's reins to be led to the make-shift stable. Lexa looked around the camp. Both Trikru and Skaikru people had gathered when they saw her approaching. She discretely searched the crowds for blonde hair as she walked up to the main entrance.

After a formal welcoming by Kane and Clarke's mother, Lexa made her way to the council room with them. Bellamy, Octavia and Indra joined them. As they entered, the Commander was surprised that Clarke wasn't there, but quickly made sure the disappointment did not show on her face.

As Abby was about to start the meeting on various topics they had to discuss, Lexa interrupted her.

"Should we not wait for Clarke?" she asked, almost making it sound like an order. After all, Clarke was the one she still thought of as the Sky people's leader, no matter who the Arker's called their Chancellor. Bellamy's jaw clenched and Octavia was silent, knowing this was not her place to talk. She was there as Indra's second and a possible bridge between the two people, nothing more.

"No," Abby said, looking down at the map. "She won't be joining us today." Abby looked up at the Commander with an expressionless face, but Lexa noticed something in her eyes that did not seem right and her mind started racing. She ached to order Abby to explain, but refrained from doing so. She had seen Bellamy tensing up at her question, and made a point of it to question both him and Octavia later. For now, she would get on with the meeting, as was her job as the Commander.

The meeting dragged on for about an hour or so, and they discussed practicalities about trading supplies, Mount Weather remains and politics that seemed unimportant to Lexa. She caught her mind drifting off to Clarke several times, even when she tried to stay focused on the map and discussions in front of her.

The Mountain had fallen ten days ago, and they had spent the first two days burning the dead; Trikru and Skaikru warriors, but mostly Mountain Men's bodies. Although the army had made it inside the mountain, Clarke had to irradiate a whole level when Cage had locked his people in and threatened to kill her mother and friends. The Mountain had been filled with burned and misshapen bodies of those that could not handle the radiation level. It had been exhausting and dreadful work, but eventually they cleared out all the corpses and burned them. Lexa had insisted that the spirits of the fallen warriors were not to be set free in unison with the Mountain Men's. Clarke had found no need to argue.

Lexa had left the Skaikru's settlement for TonDC two days later. The city was being rebuild and there had been matters she was forced to attend to, including leading many warriors and wounded back home to their families. She had been eager to get back to camp Jaha and celebrate their victory with Clarke and their people, but now she feared that she had stayed away too long after all.

Indra filled in answers when she noticed the Commander was barely paying attention to the meeting, and made a point of it to get the Commander's mind back to the discussions.

As Lexa left the Ark building after the meeting was over, the sun was starting to descend and she could smell food being cooked for dinner. She summoned Indra, who was walking not too far behind her.

"Is my tent set up?" she asked.

"Yes, Heda," Indra nodded. Lexa considered asking Indra to fetch the Blake siblings in order to ask them about Clarke's absence from the meeting, but decided against it. Dinner would be soon, and she had a good chance of finding Clarke then.

To her dismay though, she didn't. Lexa looked around the settlement, noticing Skaikru and Trikru mingling together over their meal. She only wished she could share her appreciation for this with Clarke, since they had made it happen together.

A remaining group of the original hundred sat together near a fire, eating their food. Lexa recognized Clarke's friends.

Octavia and Lincoln, who were sitting with the group, noticed her walking in their direction, and Lincoln respectfully stood up, nodded his head with a "Heda," and shortly after Octavia did the same. Lexa nodded her acknowledgement and noticed the cuts and bruises on Octavia's arms and face. With slight amusement she realized Octavia must still be training with her warriors.

She looked around the group of young people that seemed to be less talkative and energized than she remembered them.

"It is good to see all of you again," Lexa said to them after a few moments, softening her facial expression slightly.

"Commander," Raven smiled. They all mumbled something alike, but barely took their eyes off their plates. Something was off, Lexa knew. She had expected Clarke to be with her friends after she had not found her at the table with her mother.

"Might any of you be able to tell me where Clarke is?" she asked, shifting her gaze to Octavia who had silently sat back down. No one answered for a while.

"She's in her room," Octavia said after a few seconds. This answer wasn't completely satisfying to Lexa, as it seemed weird for people to be so unwilling to speak about it if Clarke was merely taking a nap or doing whatever in her room. Bellamy stood up, having not taken a bite of his food since the Commander had walked up to them. Raven held onto the shirt on Bellamy's arm as she pulled herself up as well.

"Clarke hasn't been…feeling well," Raven spoke up before Bellamy could say anything, always finding it easier to talk to the Commander of the Grounders than any of the Skaikru had. She had confidence, defiance, and Lexa respected her for keeping it in check towards her. Bellamy was staring off to something on the ground a little farther away with an emotionless expression on his face, and Lexa's suspicion that something was wrong with Clarke was almost confirmed by this.

She was about to order him to take her to Clarke's residence when Octavia stood up again.

"If you wish, I can take you to her room, Heda," she said quietly, not looking anyone in the eye. Bellamy started to protest and grabbed Octavia's arm. Jasper cut in.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" he asked grimly. "No offense, Commander," he added, looking at Lexa's hardened face.

"O, remember what the Chancellor said. Abby's not going to like it if you do this," Bellamy told his sister with slight anger and concern in his voice.

"I know what Abby said," Octavia responded, pissed off at her brother. "But we both know that if the Commander of the twelve clans ordered me to take her to Clarke, I would obey her order over Abby's." Octavia glanced at Lincoln and then at Lexa, waiting for a response.

Had the Chancellor really ordered Clarke's friends to leave Clarke alone? Clarke had fought to get her friends back, and now that she had them back, Lexa found it odd that she was not amongst them. Stranger even, that they had been requested to leave her alone and that the group seemed to - reluctantly - accept this.

Lexa felt a need to defy Abby's order; she was the Commander and if she wanted to meet with Clarke, she would. However, she felt it would do no good to her status with the Sky people or the Chancellor if she would force them to take her to the Sky Princess now.

"Continue with you meal, Skaikru," Lexa said to the group. She took a few steps away from them and beckoned Octavia.

"Does Clarke still reside in the same room as she did when I left?"Lexa asked her, quiet enough so the others wouldn't hear. Octavia nodded. Lexa thanked her with a slight nod of her own. Then she walked off, grabbed a plate and some food and made her way to her tent outside of Camp Jaha's gates.

Inside her tent, finally alone and away from the crowd's eyes and respectful murmurs of 'Heda', Lexa set her food on the table and slumped down in a chair. She looked at the dried meat on her plate and felt no urge to eat. Even so, she knew she needed her strength and tossed a few berries in her mouth before standing up. She grabbed a bowl of water and a cloth, took off the jacket she had been wearing and sat down again. She washed her hands and arms, wiping off the dirt from the horse ride and taking off the remaining lines of war paint on her face.

Her mind wandered to Clarke. She had hoped to share this meal with her, since the war was over and things were finally calming down. She had wished to invite Clarke to Polis in return, to throw a feast and celebrate it with all of their people. But Clarke wasn't there. She was in her room. And so Lexa retired to her own tent as well, not caring what her people or the Sky people would say.

For there is no reason for me to be out there anymore.

It was almost dark when Lexa left her tent. She walked back in through the gates of Camp Jaha. Most people had retired to their tents, with the exception of a few who sat around the fire, talking and some drinking. She noticed Indra talking to Nyko.

"Naikou," Lexa said, walking up to them.

"Heda," Nyko greeted her.

"How are the wounded?" she asked him, not wanting to immediately jump to the question that was burning on her mind.

"They are alive, and most are regaining strength, Heda," he answered.

"Good," Lexa answered. Indra looked at the Commander and when she received a nod from Lexa she knew she was dismissed and walked off.

"You have been here while I was gone, Nyko. I have been made aware that Clarke has stayed in her room tonight. Is this because she does not wish to meet with me?" Lexa asked him. She had begun fearing that perhaps Clarke had not wanted to see Lexa, and that no one had dared to tell her for fear of her reaction. Nyko sighed, looking at his feet.

"No, Heda," he said. When she looked at him for further explanation, he continued. "In fact, many of us were hoping she would appear today if she knew of your arrival. To my regret, she has not left her room tonight. As she hasn't for many days."

"How many days?" Lexa asked, feeling sick in her stomach.

"Not since you left for TonDC, Heda. She helped out in the Medical Bay with the wounded for two days after the Mountain fell. Then she retired to her room one day and after that I did not see her with the wounded again."

Bellamy sat at the fire, his hands around a cup of the latest version of Monty's Moonshine. Across him, some of the hundred were talking with the occasional sound of laughter. He felt a little angry towards them. They barely deserved to have a good time when Clarke, who got them out of the mountain, was not even with them.

Bellamy and the others had tried talking to Clarke, forgiving her every time she apologized. They had tried comforting her when she was slipping away in the grief and anger that they all felt - although none of their pain could be compared to Clarke's, Bellamy knew that.

While many felt a new sense of happiness and relief after the Mountain had fallen, Clarke hadn't shown any pride over the victory. And they watched her suffer, they watched her drown and become an empty shell of nothing, until eventually Abby told them to leave Clarke alone. She needed time, Abby had said, time to grief and come to terms with what had happened. Bellamy had been angry, they had all been angry, since they were convinced letting Clarke isolate herself was not a good move. But they knew there was nothing they could do. If Clarke wanted to be among her friends, they were there for her. But days passed without Clarke coming to see them, and Bellamy almost felt abandoned by his friend.

When Lexa walked up to him, he didn't look up as she sat next to him. The Commander of the twelve clans was sitting next to him, and Bellamy didn't even feel the need to say anything. He wondered if that had anything to do with what he had been drinking. Lexa raised her own cup to her mouth as she stared into the fire and seemed content to keep quiet as well. Bellamy knew then, they were two people both missing the company of someone who was their friend. Both worried about someone they cared for.

"We do care about her, you know," he spoke after a while. "We tried to make her feel better, to comfort her, be there for her." Lexa didn't speak. Instead, she took another sip of the drink that burned nicely down her throat.

"When she was sad or angry, we understood. We all suffered losses. But then one day, she just became empty. Like we'd lost her." He paused and let silence envelop them again before continuing. "Maybe we just don't know how to help. I wish we could. I wish anyone could."

They sat near the fire in silence for a little longer, and when Lexa finished her drink, she stood up. She looked at the dark-haired Sky boy.

"I understand."

Lexa retreated to her tent. She would try to sleep. Her mind ached to go see Clarke, but something held her back. Maybe it was the fact that she didn't want to admit to herself that she cared for Clarke. If that was the case, she would most definitely not want to show that to anyone.

Love is weakness, she had told Clarke. And she saw that now in Bellamy again; the boy was weakening due to the love for his friend.

As she got under the furs on her bed, she remembered Clarke stabbing the murderer Finn with tears in her eyes, and TonDC burning and Clarke running into the explosion to save her mother. Love is weakness, she had proven again.

And then she had kissed Clarke. Clarke had become her weakness, but she was determined to hide that. Going out there to find Clarke in the evening hours when she should be sleeping would definitely prove that it was a weakness though, wouldn't it?

Yes, it would.

So when Lexa got out of bed after an hour of worrying, she fought back those thoughts of weakness as best as she could.