summary: five-0 takes a huge hit after an explosion and Steve and Kono have to hang onto each other to make it through, but it won't be easy.

genre: hurt/comfort/romance/family

Warnings: probably some mild adult situations later on (all T-rated), as well as severe injuries to major characters, possible death for one, but I haven't decided so let me know your thoughts on that.

Pairings: Steve/Kono, Danny/Rachel, Chin/Malia

Blown Away

Chapter One "Shrapnel"

She ran through the hospital corridors, ignoring the people she pushed aside in her fixated state. She had been on her way to meet the guys at the warehouse when she got the call that there had been an explosion. It hadn't even been Chin or Danny or Steve. No, it was some HPD jerk who didn't even know their names. He just said all three members of Five-0 on scene were injured. He didn't know how bad. Kono had to resist cussing him out as she redirected her car towards Queens Medical Center. She had more important things to think about than some dumb rookie who probably didn't know anything anyway.

It hadn't been that long since Kono was a rookie herself, but she hoped she had never been that useless. Maybe she was a little stressed. Maybe she was redirecting her frustration at the guys for always getting into trouble at a defenseless drone. Correction, her frustration at Steve for always getting everyone else into trouble.

When she reached the ER, Kono went right to the receptionist and slapped her badge on the counter, insisting to know where the rest of her team was. The woman shrunk under Kono's glare, and the young Hawaiian realized she was being too harsh. She attempted to soften her features and asked more politely for information on the other three Five-0s.

Kono was directed to an examination room where she was told she would find answers. When she pushed through the door to nurses' protests, she saw Steve sitting on the table in only his boxers. The doctor and nurses were pulling shards of metal and wood from cuts all over his body, but surprisingly, he didn't look that bad. He was Steve, when did he ever look bad? The worst of the injuries seemed to be a large gash on his left calf, a hole in his right shoulder, and some bruising across his torso. He probably had some broken ribs.

But he was alive. He was okay. Kono's mind immediately shifted to her cousin and one loudmouth Jerseyan.

"Chin and Danny?" she said, unable to form a coherent sentence.

Steve only looked at her with those big blue eyes she could never quite read. "I don't know," he said. "They were hurt in the blast. Closer than me." He looked away from her then as if ashamed he hadn't been hurt as badly as they were.

One of the nurses took Kono's arm. "Come with me," she said. "I'll give you the situation on your whole team. He needs to rest a while." She jerked her head toward Steve.

Kono nodded, exchanging one last look with Steve before following the nurse out into the hallway. She wasted no time demanding to know what was going on.

"Officer Kalakaua," the nurse said, in what was probably supposed to be a calming voice. "Lieutenant Kelly and Detective Williams are being treated as we speak. Their injuries were more extensive than Commander McGarrett's, but we won't know anything until the doctors have a chance to look at them. I do know that Detective Williams was unconscious after the explosion, and Lieutenant Kelly lost a lot of blood."

"Okay, hold on," Kono said. "What exactly happened?"

The nurse shook her head. "I don't know much about the explosion. You can talk to your friend about that when he's rested a while."

Kono rubbed her forehead and began pacing. "So..."

The nurse patted her arm. "I'll come find you as soon as I have anything for you, and they'll let you know when Commander McGarrett can see you."

She left Kono standing there in the dimly lit hallway. The cacophony of hospital noises faded away, and all she could think was, God, don't let them die.

Kono slumped against the wall and slid to the floor. The day had started out like any other, and then taken a sharp turn for the worse. All Kono could do was keep playing the image of Steve's haunted face over and over again in her mind. It was like that night he'd been arrested. The look he had given her that said everything was over.

Kono shook herself and let her head fall back against the wall. Everything couldn't be over like that. Chin and Danny would be fine. They had to be. And still, Kono couldn't help worrying a little about Steve. He seemed to be okay, but she couldn't stop thinking about all the blood and the angry bruises all over him. They'd all seen Steve in bad situations, but somehow this felt worse. Like it broke him in a way she couldn't understand.

Kono had to focus on breathing in and out, calming herself down. That was how Steve's doctor found her, still sprawled in the hallway, hugging her knees to her chest.

"Officer Kalakua?" he asked.

She looked up, as if surprised. "Yes?"

"You can come see Commander McGarrett now for a few minutes."

Kono jumped to her feet, and winced as she put weight on the one that had fallen asleep. She followed the doctor into Steve's room. The man himself was sitting on the bed in hospital scrubs. He looked pale and tired. The purple circles under his eyes were more pronounced, and his mouth was set in a firm line.

Kono sat on the bed next to him and took his hand. "Hey, how are you doing?" she asked quietly, almost afraid of startling him.

Steve looked her in the eye. "I'm fine," he said. But his voice was hollow, it had no inflection. He didn't seem fine at all.

"Steve, what—what happened?" Kono asked.

"It was a trap," he said numbly. "We saw it coming and tried to get away. We hadn't even gone inside, but the blast carried out into the street. I... I should have been with them."

"No," Kono said, holding his hand in both of hers. "Steve, you would have been hurt worse, and that wouldn't help anybody."

Steve nodded, but Kono didn't think he believed her. "Hey," she said. "When can you leave?"

Steve met her eyes again. "They said I could only leave tonight if I had someone to stay with me, but..."

"I'll take you home."

"No, you should stay to wait for news."

Kono shook her head. "They'll call me. There's nothing we can do here, and I'd rather not spend the night in the hospital, and I know you don't want to."

Steve nodded. "Okay," he agreed. "Can you get my clothes?"

Kono looked around the room and in the closet, but found nothing. "I think they probably threw them out," she said. "Did they have to cut them off you?"

"I... don't remember."

"Steve, how badly are you hurt?"

"It's not serious, Kono," he insisted.

"Yeah. I'm going to go talk to your doctor, okay? Just stay here."

Kono left before Steve could argue anymore and went in search of his doctor. She found him a few halls down and asked him about Steve's condition and whether she should take him home.

"I think he would be alright if someone stayed with him," he said. "He has a mild concussion from the fall, and we don't want him attempting any strenuous activity with those broken ribs. There's also the risk of reopening wounds, so we just want him to be careful."

"Okay," Kono said, nodding. "So, it'd be okay if I drove him home and stayed the night?"

"I think so. Just so long as you keep an eye on him for a couple of days."

Kono agreed. "That shouldn't be a problem."

In the end, she went to the gift shop and got Steve some sweats to wear home. He wasn't happy about it, but it was better that staying in the hospital while she went all the way back to his house to get clothes. They picked up his pain meds too, much to Steve's annoyance, and then they were on their way. He also seemed irritated that Kono was driving, even though it was her car. She knew he was upset and feeling out of control and worried about his teammates. So she didn't say anything.

When they got to Steve's house he went into the kitchen, walking slow and stiffly. As much as he tried to hide it, Kono knew he must have been in a lot of pain. She heard the refrigerator open and the snap-hiss of a beer bottle opening.

"Hey, I don't think you're suppose to have alcohol with this stuff," Kono said, coming into the kitchen and holding up the paper back with the pain pills in it.

"Then I won't take 'em," Steve replied, and took a long drink from the bottle. "Here." He handed her one.

Kono shrugged. "Fine," she said. She knew it was a bad idea, but she wasn't exactly in the greatest mood either, not knowing how her cousin was doing.

They stood in the kitchen in silence, and didn't say anything as they made their way through the six pack in Steve's fridge. Kono had never been a heavy drinker, but she could hold it well enough. Still, she was feeling like she'd had too much with the speed they'd been consuming the alcohol.

But Steve wasn't done. As six empty bottles sat on the counter and the clock chimed twelve, he moved toward the fridge again.

"You need to sleep," Kono said, trying to stop him by putting her arm over the door.

Steve wasn't listening. He pushed her away, a little too hard, and she slipped to the floor with a loud smack on the tile. He stood there with the refrigerator door half open, staring at her like she might shatter into pieces.

"I'm fine," Kono muttered, using the edge of the counter to pull herself up. She pushed the door closed again. "Just go to bed, Steve."

He nodded and headed for the stairs, but he turned back. "You can sleep in my sister's room," he said. "Or wherever you want."

Kono followed him. "I'll make sure you get to bed, and then I'll find somewhere," she said.

They stumbled up the stairs, and Kono found herself holding onto Steve's arm, whether to support him or herself, she wasn't sure. They got to Steve's room, and she realized that the way things were going, they might end up sleeping in a heap on the floor. But they made it to the bed, and fell haphazardly on it.

"Not exactly how I'd imagined it," Kono muttered.

"What?" Steve asked, his voice was getting slower all the time.

"Nothing."

Kono wasn't about to admit, even in her drunken state, that she had imagined sleeping with Steve. He was her boss, but more so, she was sure he would never be interested in her like that, and she was intent on avoiding disappointment.

Kono couldn't believe she was thinking about that at a time like this. Their team was in pieces. They didn't know whether Chin and Danny would be okay or not, and here they were, both drunk, falling asleep in Steve's bed, and she was thinking about what it would be like if they had meant to fall into bed together.

The whole situation was absurd. Kono had never known Steve to be like this before. Yes, he took the blame for everything, but he usually channeled that energy into accomplishing something instead of sulking in his self-deprecation. Something was wrong. Something had broken in Steve with that explosion, more than his ribs or his concussed head.

Kono lay awake trying to think of what to do to keep him from completely self-destructing when she felt like falling to pieces herself. But her mind got slower and slower, until she lost all awareness in fitful sleep.

She was jolted back to reality by a shout and sudden movement. She opened her eyes to see that she had been flipped over on her stomach, and Steve was sitting upright. Pale light was coming in through the windows, reflecting off the beads of sweat on his forehead.

Kono got up on her hands and knees and crawled over to him. "Steve, it's okay," she said, sitting next to him and putting her hands on his shoulders.

He looked at her with wide eyes, as if he didn't recognize her. The cuts from yesterday were standing out on his pale face, and the red bruises had turned a dark purple. He winced, though Kono wasn't sure what hurt. It could have been anything, and she was betting the mild hangover didn't help at all.

"Hey, talk to me," Kono said. "Did you have a nightmare?"

Steve shook his head. "I'm fine," he said in a raspy voice. He moved to the edge of the bed. "You can use the shower down the hall if you want."

"Steve, are you feeling okay?"

"Fine," Steve repeated, pulling the gift shop t-shirt over his head and tossing it on the floor. Kono couldn't tear her eyes away from the jagged shrapnel wounds and skin that was more bruise than skin. The only time she had seen him this bad was after North Korea, and even that didn't seem so bad compared to his current state.

"You don't look fine," Kono said.

Steve didn't answer as he went into the master bathroom and shut the door. Kono stared at the blank white wood, wondering how he was going to get through this, how she was going to get through it herself.

On the nightstand, where she had forgotten she left it, Kono's phone rang. It was the hospital.