"Deep in the meadow, under the willow. A bed of grass, a soft green pillow. Lay down your head, and close your eyes… And when they open, the sun will rise."
Sam sat back against the old willow tree, watching the soft flowers with delicate, white petals billow in the cool breeze. He watched as the smooth, tall grass flattened against the ground, his long legs stretched over the greens. His big, hazel eyes grazed the meadow, peace gracing him while he listened as birdsong entered the waking world. He wasn't entirely sure how he ended up there, but he liked it. He loved the sweet smell of flowers, the wonderfully fresh air filling his lungs. It was peaceful. He was peaceful. But… something was missing.
Sam glanced to his left, towards east at the rising sun. The stars in the dawning sky were turning to pale specks as they slowly disappeared. A small smile blessed the Winchester's lips, nice and serene. But… something was still missing.
He shut his eyes, inhaling a deep, calm breath. He sat like that for several moments, just listening. Sam didn't think of the fears of the outside world. He didn't think of the pain of betrayal or being used. He didn't let the sadness that threatened to overwhelm him block the present, and what was happening now. He just sat back against the wishful willow, breathing in peace and serenity. But… Sam could feel something was still missing.
"Here it's safe, and here it's warm… Here the daisies guard you from every harm. Here your dreams are sweet, and tomorrow brings them true… Here is the place where I love you."
Sam felt heat from the rising sun spread through him, and he let out blissful sigh. He felt the flowers that surrounded him brush against his clothed body, and caress his bare arms that rested on either side of his thighs. Yet another smile plastered onto Sam's lips, his eyes still shut. An image suddenly washed through his mind, causing him to take in a sharp breath.
"Gabriel," he murmured softly, eyes tightly squeezed closed, not wanting the picture to leave his mind. He watched the archangel's smirk widen into a grin, a swirly lollipop held in his hand.
"Heya, kiddo!" the vision purred, golden eyes sparkling mischievously. Sam let out a longing sigh, knowing it was just a daydream, but wishing it to be true. Suddenly, the vision grew blurry, and the archangel twisted into blackness. Sam's content smile faded, leaving sadness.
"Deep in the meadow, hidden far away… A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray."
The blackness formed into a smiling Jessica, dressed in a nurse's outfit, her long, blonde hair pulled back into two pigtails. Sam's heart wrenched in pain at the sight, but his eyes wouldn't open. They stayed closed, forced to see the image of his forgotten, dead girlfriend. Jessica Moore suddenly changed into a smirking Lucifer, his blood splattered face twisted into an evil sneer. Terror shot through Sam, overlapping his sadness and regret… Yet, his eyes still remained shut.
"Forget your woes, and let your troubles lay… And when it's morning, they'll wash away."
The visions erupted into flames, and blackened into darkness. A small light danced across Sam's shut eyelids, and formed into the one and only trickster Sam knew and missed. Gabriel grinned at him, golden eyes warm. The fear and agony slowly ebbed away, and Sam let out a relieved sigh. A gentle smile spread across his lips, and he felt the archangel's warmth flow into him.
"Gabriel," he whispered again, the longing becoming stronger. He didn't realize how much he yearned for the archangel's presence. This vision was confusing his emotions; causing him to feel regret, want, and happiness all at once.
"Here it's safe, and here it's warm… And here the daisies guard you from every harm. And here your dreams are sweet, and tomorrow brings them true. Here is the place where I love you."
"Where I love you," Sam mumbled under his breath, feeling Gabriel's warm breath billow against his face as the archangel edged forward in his dream. Sam didn't realize how much he wanted Gabriel, how much he needed Gabriel.
"Here is the place-" the angel's voice purred, sounding much louder and closer. Sam's eyes opened to stare straight into two pools of honey. "-where I love you."
Sam smiled, pushing his neck forward, pressing his lips into Gabriel's, who smiled into the kiss. The archangel was sitting closely beside the Winchester, his knees digging into Sam's side as he leaned over the human. Sam's eyes fluttered closed, and he let out a soft sigh, reopening them. His affectionate smile disappeared as he stared at the empty space next to him, where the angel had been. He felt his heart fall, his chest filling with utter sadness. It must have been a dream. It must have all been but a dream…
"Deep in the meadow, hidden far away… A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray."
Sam's heart ached from inside his chest. Why had such a sweet vision turn so sour in this beautiful meadow? Things had been going so well, so perfect. All of his troubles had dispersed among the waving daisy petals. The not Apocalypse, Gabriel's death, Bobby's death, the leviathans, Lucifer… it had all been hidden away under the bare branches of the willow tree. But now they were back. Sam let out a choked noise, his soul writhing in pain and agony. Why must he be filled with so much sadness? Why was his life a complete disaster? Why did every single person he ever loved die a painful death? These questions are the ones Sam wished he knew the answers to. His eyes squeezed shut, tears slipping down his smooth cheeks.
"Forget your woes, and let your troubles lay… And when again it's morning, they'll wash away."
Sam couldn't keep the grief out, or stop the anguish from stabbing at his heart. It wouldn't leave him, and no visions that would make him smile returned to his mind. All that was left was misery, torment, and sorrow. He let out a whimper, trembling as he pulled his knees up to his chest. He tucked in his chin, his forehead pushed into his kneecaps. Sam felt a hand gently touch his shoulder.
"Here it's safe, and here it's warm," Gabriel's voice breathed into the Winchester's ear. Sam tensed, holding his breath. He opened his eyes, but didn't dare lift his head from his knees, continuing to stare at his stomach. "And here the daisies guard you from every harm." Tears dripped from Sam's hazel eyes, his heart beating fast at the archangel's delicate touch.
"Gabriel," he whispered, voice cracked with grief. "Gabriel, I don't feel safe. I don't feel warm. My woes are still fresh in my mind. My troubles haven't lay down to rest. The daisies aren't protecting me from any harm." Sam trembled, finally lifting his head to stare heart-wrenched at the archangel, who smiled sadly back. "It… It still hurts, Gabe," he whimpered. "It hurts a lot." Gabriel leaned forward, pressing their lips softly together in a sweet, gentle kiss. Sam reached out, wrapping his arms around the archangel's neck, and fisting his hands into Gabriel's buttoned up shirt.
"Here your dreams are sweet, and tomorrow brings them true," Gabe murmured against Sam's lips. The feeling of Gabriel against him made a smile twitch at the corner of his mouth. The archangel pulled back, golden eyes sparkling up at the Winchester. The young hunter smiled despairingly at Gabriel, nuzzling the angel with their foreheads pressed together.
"Gabriel, I…"
Suddenly, Sam blinked, and his archangel was gone. He sat there, alone against the willow, still leaning forward in hopes for more of Gabriel's touch. Sam let out a choked sob, hunching forward, face in his hands. These visions were getting excruciatingly heart breaking. Sam wasn't sure if he could take them for much longer. His soul screamed to be touched, to be caressed, to be felt by the hands of his archangel. He wanted him back. He needed him back, and the visions and images weren't helping at all. Sam sobbed into his hands, his shoulders trembling.
"Here is the place where I love you."