Hello, hello, hello! This is my first ever fanfic, so if it completely sucks, your wasted time will be refunded. Cookie if you can tell me where that line "your wasted time will be refunded" is from. Also, cookie if you REVIEW! I like reviews. **uses epic ninja skill to make everybody review**

My parents were leaving. They did this frequently.

They didn't quite deserve the label "bad parents." They tried, the boys and I knew they did. But they weren't quite cut out for the responsibility of parenthood.

They were going to the movies, two hours away. So they were leaving now, at five, getting dinner there, and they wouldn't be home until midnight, or later. So, seven hours of being our own supervisors.

I should probably introduce myself. I'm Lianna Kari Jacobson, thirteen-year-old aspiring writer and Resident Nitwit. My brothers, Xavier Jake Justin and Tristan Timothy Bartleby Nicholas (did I mention my parents are weird?) are ten and seven. We had settled ourselves in for the night. Tristan was playing Wii, Xavier was listening to Lil Wayne, and I was reading fanfiction. This is how we spend most of our No Parent Nights.

"Yo, White Knight, play baseball with me!" shouted Tristan. As a joke, Trist calls Xavier "White Knight" because his name sounds like Savior. Get it? Ha ha!

Yeah, I know, not funny. Seven-year-old joke.

"Only if I can play 'How to Love' in the speakers," he retorted.

"Sure, whatevs. Li?"

I am very aware of the fact that my brother who has six more years to go talks like a teenager. Cut him some slack, he lives with me.

"I don't care." I was plugged into my iTouch, Paramore blasting into my ears. Misery Business came on, and I started to sing.

"I'm in the business of misery, let's take it from the top. She's got a body like an hourglass that's ticking like a clock-"

"Li! WE HATE PARAMORE!"

"You guys have no souls." I resumed singing, albeit under my breath.

"I get Voldemort!" Xavier shouted.

"I get Dobby and Gollum! And Yoda!"

If that made no sense to you, let me explain. When you play Wii baseball, they give you random Miis (avatars) on your team. The boys are in the habit of making random Miis of fictitious characters. We've got the Fellowship of the Ring, Gollum, Harry, Hermione, Ron, Dumbledore, Neville, the Weasley twins, Ginny, Dobby, Voldemort, Yoda, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Little Anakin, and Luke Skywalker.

I kept reading my fanfic. It was a very good movie parody, called Jackson, Where's my Paycheck? Go check it out. If you do not laugh, you can sue me for wasting your time.

I laughed at random intervals. The boys are used to this. Sometimes I laugh at my songs, sometimes my fanfics. Periodically, I recorded on my computer who had won the Wii baseball. We keep an Excel spreadsheet. When we get too mature to play Wii or when we chuck it because it doesn't work anymore, I will print said spreadsheet and we will hang it up on the wall for eternity.

Life was going good. Occasional exclaims of delight or groans of "What was that?", Paramore drowning out White Knight's rappers, Jackson, Where's my Paycheck? making me laugh…life was good.

Suddenly, the house shook violently. I flinched, slamming fanfic shut and tentatively putting Paramore on pause. Tristan shut the Wii off. Xavier yanked his iPod nano out of the speakers and looked at me, his expression that of a cornered, injured small mammal.

"Was that an earthquake?" Tristan asked, fear in his eyes. Not a common emotion on my adorable little brother.

"I don't know, little buddy," I admitted. "I don't know."

And the world was blinded in a explosion of pure white, and I fell backward in a smooth, fluid motion. My final thought was Where is the sofa? It should be here to catch me…

Yo! Did you like? That's what that little button that says "Review this Chapter" is for. Please don't flame. It's okay if you say it sucks, but I do not like to be personally insulted.