The Path of Thorns

A/N: RL/SB and RL/SS. Story takes place directly after book three. Can Remus and Sirius work through what's happened between them, or will Remus stay with his new lover through it? And is it really love that kept Remus with Severus for so long? Please R&R.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters associated with it.

Warnings: Rated for language, sexual situations, mild abuse. Blah blah. What I always warn for.

Too long. It had been far too long since Remus had set foot in in this house. Now standing in the dusty, rotting hallway with it's rightful owner leaning heavily against the entranceway watching him, Remus felt more than ever that he did not belong. When he turned to meet Sirius' eyes for the first time since the incident in the Shrieking Shack when he'd shifted and completely lost himself, Remus felt a great deal of shame wash over him. By the time he'd regained his senses that horrible night, Sirius had been long gone. It had taken Remus too long weeks to track Sirius down and now, he had nothing to say.

Looking into those dark, sunken eyes that had once been so familiar to him, Remus saw only a stranger. It had been twelve years, he reminded himself. He should have had a million things to say after all this time but as he studied the gaunt face and and skeletal body that had one time been the lithe, muscular one he'd known in the most intimate of ways, he had nothing. Shifting his weight from one foot to the other, Remus tried a smile. When Sirius didn't return it, Remus fell back a step.

Even now, with Sirius within touching distance, Remus struggled to find even a hint of the old emotions he'd once held for the other man. After Lily and James' death, Remus spent far too many months, years even, hardening himself against Sirius. He'd told himself time and time again that Sirius was a Death Eater, a traitor, and a murderer. He spent so much time telling himself that he no longer felt anything for Sirius that he became so familiar with the idea, and he truly started to belive it. Even now that he knew of Sirius' innocence in the whole ordeal and thinking about all the nights he'd spent in Sirius' arms, Remus could not feel as he once had when he was young, naive, and still believed that there was true love in the world.

Finally, Sirius' gruff voice roused Remus from this thoughts, rather violently he might add.

"What do you want, Remus?" the dark haired man asked, moving his thin body away from the wall where he'd been leaning. His movements were jerky, all traces of his past grace gone. Sirius was only 33 years old and already he had the movements and the look of an old man. Not that Remus was much better.

The years had not been kind to Remus and his once tanned skin was now an almost sickly yellow shade. Even his dark blond hair had a few strands of greying locks in it. When Remus had lived at Hogwarts during his schooling his 5'10" frame had been a healthy 160 pounds. However, after Sirius' imprisonment, Remus had dropped 35 pounds in two short months and his health had never fully recovered from it. He wondered if he looked as alien to Sirius as Sirius did to him. After a moment, he spoke.

"I came to see you, Sirius."

"See me..." Sirius murmured. A smile crept onto his face and he shook his head. "That's rich, Remus." Sirius laughed and slipped out of the room and into the living area, out of Remus' view. Unsure of what to do, Remus followed the long haired man and watched as he fell into one of the overstuffed chairs and reclined, eyes closed tightly. A second passed before Sirius spoke again.

"12 years Remus, without so much as a lousy owl and now you want to see me?"

The dark eyes opened and Sirius stared into Remus' own with a look of disgust on his face.

"You really expect me to belive that, Remus? You must be joking. You never even tried to get in contact with me after they took me. After you thought I killed James and Lily. My own best friend Remus. You believed I did it."

To that, Remus had nothing to say. Yes, he did think Sirius had done it. He'd shown the capability to kill all to easily when they were in school, with Severus. It didn't help his case that he was from the Black family and his own brother had openly been a Death Eater before his murder. Remus lowered his gaze with hesitance.

"How could I have seen you, Sirius? You were in the highest security cell they had and I am a werewolf. They'd never have let me in."

"Did you even try, Remus? Did you? Or did you just give up on me so easily?" Sirius asked, standing and moving towards the scarred man. He stopped only inches from the other man, their noses almost touching. Finally, he spoke again, knowing Remus had nothing to say to that.

"I think you need to leave, Remus. Now."

Startled, Remus looked up into the face that was kissably close to his. Fighting the anger and humiliation rising in him, he nodded. As he stepped away from his ex lover, he caught the smell of Sirius' skin in the air and his breath caught in his throat. There was once a time when Remus would have grabbed Sirius, pinning their bodies together in passion when that smell entered his nostrils. Now, he just backed up. At his movement, Sirius too pulled away and began walking towards the front door. Following at least 3 feet behind the dark haired man, Remus watched the thin man's back from beneath his heavily lidded eyes. When Sirius reached the door, he yanked it open violently and turned to stare at the blond man.

"Get out, Remus."

There was something in the way he said the words, but Remus couldn't be sure. He hadn't heard that tone in 12 years and he no longer recognized it. As he stepped outside the house, Remus looked at Sirius, questioning him. Sirius' expression was unreadable to Remus but he was sure there was something there he was missing, although he couldn't name it.

"Sirius... I'm sorry," he said knowing it wasn't nearly enough.

Without answering Sirius shut the door, that strange look still on his face.