A/N: Hey so this is my first story here, so my apologies if it's bad. I wanted to write something having to do with the episode "Flash and Substance" where Orion remarks to Flash, "You play the fool to hide a warrior's pain." I want to show Flash's thoughts when he does "play the fool" and gets treated like a kid by the rest of the League. I also might use the other League member's POV depending on how I go about this. This takes place before Justice League Unlimited, so still only seven league members. I hope you guys-well anyone who actually reads this-like this.
It was bound to happen eventually. As easygoing as Wally was, he was only human, though the League sometimes forgot that, not that it was their fault seeing how nothing ever seemed to bother Wally. He was always there, always smiling and happy. He always had a joke to lighten the mood. It was his unofficial job, and despite what John would say, Wally took his job very seriously.
After a particularly rough mission, he would crack a joke to ease the tensions when things would get too serious, and sometimes he'd succeed. His efforts would be rewarded with exasperated laughs and amused smiles. Wally would swear on his life that Batman's glare would soften marginally. No one would say it, but he knows they appreciated his stupid corny jokes and dumb smiles, and it would be worth it. He would be an idiot for them, because for the first time he felt like he found a place where he fit-where everything clicked: this is what he was supposed to do. Being apart of their group made the crazy, excruciatingly slow world he was stuck in make sense.
Other times-well most of the time if he was honest-, his attempts were met with scorn and reprimand. Diana and Shayera would look at him with pitying glances, while Bats glared-well his ever-present glare would intensify by 9000 and fry his soul-and Superman lectured him about appropriate battle etiquette. "Flash, people's lives are at stake! This is no joke. You should blah blaaah blaaaah, blaaah. Blaaah blaah blah? blaaaaaah…..". Wally stopped listening by that point. Superman's lectures were dreadfully boooring. It was like he dragged each sentence out for as long as he possibly could. Ugh! It was torture! During this all, J'onn wouldn't look at him, still not exactly comfortable with public displays of human disciplinary actions. John would stay silent like the perfect soldier he was then talk to him later like nothing ever happened, not that Wally didn't appreciate the effort, because he did. He would like to forget he made a bigger fool out of himself than usual and Superman publically parented him in from their enemies. Big hit to the self-esteem there.
It was okay though. At least Bats usually kept quiet, because when Wally irritated Bats to the point where Bats yelled at him, well, those the days where Wally ran went home and ate all the ice cream in Central City, because man, Bats would rip him a new one. Bats-no Batman-, he always used his this-is-serious-I'm-Batman! voice when he reviled Wally to the point of tears-would cut in, his tone monotone but somehow seething at the same time, and straight out tell him he was unwanted. And of course Batman went into a detailed account of why. Bats-no, Batman-never liked Wally-probably even hated him, but Wally would never admit it. Wally always admired and looked up to Batman to the point where he even harbored a very very very small crush on him, which made every criticism and glare hurt a thousand times worse. The days where Batman would get mad at him reminded Wally just how unnecessary his place on the team was.
But it's fine. He was okay. Wally's a speedster. He didn't hold grudges. Besides they didn't mean it. He was a respected member of the Justice League. They were just tired and frustrated, and Wally had poor timing. Everything's fine. He would just have to try harder. he was determined to do his special job, because that was the only reason he was on this team wasn't it? He was the tension easer, the comic release, the clown. Superman was the leader; Batman was the the man with a plan/ninja because he's BATMAN!; John was the soldier, always following the orders to a T and making sure the job gets done; J'onn was the telepath; Diana was the super badass warrior; and Shayera was the kickass with a mace and a bad temper, plus she had wings! All Wally could do was run fast, and Superman could do that too! The sole reason he was on this team was because he was funny sometimes all the time. That kinda hurt.
Everything was not fine. He thought he was their equal-a fellow teammate, a hero of his own right-, but apparently he was sorely mistaken. They wouldn't even let him talk during the League meeting! Why the hell was he on this team if he was treated like some annoying petulant child? He was an adult for Pete's sake! Do they honestly think he doesn't take being the Flash seriously? Uncle Barry was the Flash, and by wearing that costume, Wally was honoring his uncle's memory. He may crack jokes frequently, but that's how he focuses. The Flash was his life. So why were all of his suggestions dismissed? Sure he was the youngest member being only 28 years old, but he was experienced. He had been in the hero business since he was 11 years old, out of all of the League members, he was one of the most experienced. And yeah, not all of Wally's suggestions were helpful, but he wasn't an idiot. He was a forensic scientist of the CCPD. Sure, he was a bit of a klutz, and sometimes he had no idea what his teammates were saying, but he had earned his right to be on this team. He saved the world side-by-side with them. He had protected Central City from supervillains all by himself for 11 years. He deserved their respect.
He pretended he didn't know about their special meetings that he wasn't invited to. He pretended not to overhear Superman talking to Diana about how he wished Flash would act more mature and responsible. He pretended he wasn't upset, and Wally was good at pretending.
He still smiled and laughed, but they felt fake, like a cheap plastic replica riddled with design flaws. If the others noticed, they didn't comment. Wally didn't know whether to feel disappointed or relieved.
It worked for a while, though when the treatment continued-the derogatory comments that chip away his self-esteem little by little-, his facade cracked. The worst part was that Wally knew they didn't mean it. They were good people-good friends-that he cared deeply for. They cared for him as well, he was sure, it was just they didn't respect him, which was his fault entirely. He chose to play the fool, it's only fair that he suffer the ramifications. In the face of all pain, Wally chose to laugh, which had helped him immensely in overcoming the grief of his beloved uncle's death, but now it had become a sinking weight, dragging him down to humiliation and shame, both of which he thought he escaped when he graduated high school. Point is, Wally was at the end of his rope here, each critique ebbing his self-confidence and self-control.
Wally was already having a bad day before he got to the Watchtower. He got home late last night after dealing with a botched robbery attempt by the Rogues and hauling them off to jail, he was late for work-which was shocking to him, because Wally made sure to always be on time, unlike his late (pun unintended) Uncle Barry who was late to everything-, he and Linda were having problems-which not telling your girlfriend where you go and how you get all these injuries will cause-, he spilled coffee all over his boss, and was in desperate need of food because his crazy metabolism would not be sated by a bowl of Froot Loops and a protein bar. Little food plus 4 hours of sleep is a bad combination for a speedster. Understandably, Wally wasn't in the best of moods.
By the time he got to the Watchtower, he was exhausted-both physically and emotionally-and in no mood to sit through another one of Superman's boring lectures. And boy was it booooring. It seemed like Superman was dragging each sentence on purposefully, repeating the same idea over and over. It's no surprise Wally zoned out and started drifting off. Superman's voice was like white noise enticing him to shut his eyes, which Wally unwillingly complied. Next thing he knew, he was on the floor and everyone was staring at him. 'Shit.'
Superman and Bats looked pissed-well Bats more than usual-, while the others looked disappointed. Wally's face went red. 'Way to prove you're not a child!' he thought sourly. But because he's Wally, he gave a sheepish smile and prepared to laugh away his embarrassment.
"Sorry guys," Wally rubbed the back of his neck with an embarrassed laugh. "I-"
"Flash," Superman's voice cut through, tired and annoyed, his hand dragging down his face in an exhausted manner. He looked straight at Wally, his eyes pleading and voice softening slightly, trying to convey his thoughts more nicely. "This is serious. What we do is serious. It affects the world and the people of it. This isn't a joke. Take it seriously."
What? Wally went stockstill. Did they think that he wasn't serious about being the Flash? That this wasn't important to him? Superman couldn't have meant that. Why would Superman say that? What even-no. He shouldn't be surprised. They think he's some slacker manchild. No. Flash could never take anything seriously in his life could he? Wally thought they were his friends, that maybe he was wrong and they had at least some respect for him, for what he did. But no. Wally picked himself off the floor. He tried to school his features, but he was too shocked. He looked up at Superman, his eyes wide and voice shaky.
"I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to fall asleep, honest." Despite being a full grown man, Wally's voice was quiet and soft, sounding more like a scared child after a nightmare than a superhero. He gave a sad chuckle. He sounded so pathetic! "It won't happen again though. I promise. And trust me it won't be so hard to keep, because I get it. I got the message. I'll go."
Everyone had some varying degree of shock on their faces, even Batman looked surprised-well as surprised as a Batman can look. They were accustomed to Wally always being in some varying degree of happiness. To see someone always smiling, someone who always has a joke to give to cheer someone else up, speak in such a self-deprecating way was shocking to say the least.
"Go? What?! NO! Where would you even-" Superman fumbled. He had the nerve to actually look like he felt bad, his face equally shocked and confused by the 180 flip in attitude Flash displayed.
"You don't have to deny it Superman. It's okay. This...this was a long time coming wasn't it? Everything is so slow to me that it feels like this was a billion years old-something already dealt with and forgotten. I kinda forgot that it was probably a few hours ago. I'm-I'm annoying, right? I get on your nerves. I think I'm helping when I'm just messing everything up." Wally didn't particularly want to spill his guts here in front of everyone, but he needed them to understand. They didn't have to suffer being in his presence anymore. He was leaving willingly before they could kick him out. "This is what's best for the League."
And with that, Wally ran out of the room down to the teleporters and beamed himself home in a flash (pun obviously intended), like the coward he was. He heard a few of the others call out for him to wait, but he couldn't face them anymore. They were probably just trying to be polite before he left. Or maybe they wanted his League membership card back. Probably the second one. He may not be a League member anymore, but he was the Flash and the Flash had a duty to protect Central City. He would be fine. He didn't need the Justice League. He'd be fine by himself-just like the old days.