A/N: Just a little ficlet to get you into the holiday spirit (and no, I do not mean Christmas). Bella/Edward of course.
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters.
Sadistic Mutilation
"Bella, please be careful!"
"I'm doing fine, Edward! I don't need your help!"
"You know, I'd feel a lot more comfortable with this if you would just let me do all of the knife-work."
"Where's the fun in that for me? I want to be the one to torture him!"
"But Bella-"
"No, Edward! I'm going to be the one to do this."
Edward drew in an unneeded breath as he closed his eyes. Sawing noises filled his ears, the obvious sound of a blade against skin, slashing, hacking. Oh yes, he knew just by the squishy, grinding noise that the lacerations were going to be deep. He only hoped that Bella wouldn't slip up and penetrate her own skin with the sharp blade.
"Bella," Edward said, his eyes still closed and shielded from the figure in front of him, most likely mutilated beyond compare. "Please, just give me the knife. I'll finish the job."
"No! Edward, I'm doing fine by myself." Bella responded, not deterring herself from her ruthless task.
Suddenly, the grinding noises stopped, followed by a gasp from Bella.
"Um, Edward?"
"Yes?"
"It's stuck."
"What do you mean, 'it's stuck'?" Edward asked, opening his eyes again.
"I mean it won't come back out. The guts must have wrapped themselves around the blade, and now the knife won't come out."
Sighing, Edward wrapped his hand around Bella's, which was still holding tight to the handle. With one swift pull, the cutter was out. After laying it down on the table, Edward stared at the pile of orange gunk.
"So, what do you think?" Bella asked, her eyes lighting up.
"You killed it." Edward stated blandly.
"I did not! He looks fine!"
"Since when do pumpkins have genders?"
"He's not a pumpkin, he's a jack-o-lantern."
"Let me guess, his name is Jack?"
Bella nodded her head in agreement.
Shrugging his shoulders, Edward picked up the mutilated pumpkin and carried it through the house. Bella followed close behind, all the while admiring her handy work. Once they reached the front door, they stepped out into the darkening evening and set Jack down in-between a pumpkin carved to look like a cat, and one with fangs.
"Let me guess, Rosalie and Emmett's?" Bella asked, gesturing to the two very well carved pumpkins that now flanked hers.
"Alice and Carlisle's." Edward replied, as he withdrew a tea light from his pocket.
"Carlisle depicted a vampire with fangs?" Bella questioned unbelievingly.
"Hey, it is Halloween."
"I guess."
Once Edward had Jack lit, he stood back up to admire it with Bella. Sure, it wasn't the most artistic pumpkin he'd ever set eyes on, what with it's almost sadistic smile and droopy eyes, but it was carved by his love, and that was all that mattered.