A/N: I tried to portray these characters as accurately as possible, but I'm not sure if I have succeeded...
Thanks for reading, and any advice or criticism (so long as it's stated kindly) is welcome!
Never Alone
His room was plain. Boring. Expressionless.
The walls were stark white, and the wooden floor beneath his feet was shiny and new. A few suitcases sat untouched, scratched and dusty from their long journey to America. The light fixture was beautiful, an ornate piece of artistry that seemed to be out-of-place in the bare room. There was a window, just one, but it was large, and gave him a splendid view of the world around him. And from where his bed was positioned, he would be able to see the lights from the city clearly come nightfall.
Alex Rider's flight had touched down in the early hours of morning, just before dawn. Sabina and her mum had been very happy to see him, and informed him that his room was left undecorated so that he would have the opportunity to make it his own. He had been assured that they intended to spruce up the place, to make it seem fit for a teenager. It was such a kind gesture, but Alex couldn't help feeling empty inside, as if his soul was as blank as the four walls around him.
He was trying to overcome. Desperately, he struggled to put the pain and the sorrow behind him, to forsake his past and embrace his future. But that was easier said than done….
Alex ran a hand through his hair and walked over to the window, flicking the locks and prying it open. He let the gentle breeze waft into his room, carrying with it the scents of the city, but he was far too lost in thought to take note of anything.
He was on an emotional rollercoaster. Sometimes he felt strong, confident, stable – other times he felt as if his whole world were crashing down around him. Right now, he was experiencing the latter.
A wave of sorrow surged through his body, making him feel dizzy and sick. He leaned forward, resting his hands on the windowsill, letting his head drop. Jack. He missed her so much, more than he would admit to anyone, even Sabina. She had always been there for him….and frankly, he wondered if he ever took her for granted.
Tears welled in his eyes, threatening to slip down his face. That terrible scene replayed in his mind until he was on the verge of a breakdown. He should have been able to save her; he should have been there for her, as she had been there for him all these years…
Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. Startled, he spun around, throwing a punch on instinct. He heard a pitched, girlish yelp, and was horrified to see Sabina Pleasure on the floor.
Alex's eyes went wide and his breathing stopped. His lungs felt like blocks of ice in his chest, and he was unable to move, unable to think. Sabina looked up at him, fear in her eyes. As recognition dawned on them both, Alex backed away abruptly, muttering apologies and shaking with anxiety.
"Alex," she whispered, standing up. "It's all right, I'm all right," she reached her hand out to him.
Hesitantly, he took it. "I'm so sorry," he whispered. "Why did you sneak up on me like that?"
Sabina blinked twice, and then pulled her hand away. "I called your name several times."
"Oh," he said. "I don't know why I—"
She cut him off. "I understand that I startled you," She paused. "Don't worry, I ducked in time, you didn't hit me. I was simply…surprised." Her voice was a bit shaky, but she forced a smile. Her words hung in the air, and they both stood there, unsure of how to proceed.
"I'm so very sorry…," he said again.
"Let's not speak of this anymore, okay? It was an accident. You were obviously distracted." Alex could tell that Sabina was a bit uneasy, and wanted to put this situation behind her as soon as possible.
She hesitated, and then gave him a quick hug. "If you ever need to talk, I am here, Alex. I won't judge you. You're not alone. Just remember that." She smiled again and turned to walk out of the room, stopping at the threshold. "Oh, and one more thing."
Alex looked up.
"I'm going out tonight with Mum to the cinema. We thought we'd catch a movie. It might bore you, but if you'd like to come, it would keep your mind off – well, you know—"
His first inclination was to decline, make up some excuse about being tired. But some part of him really wanted to escape reality for a while. "I'd love to," he plastered on a smile, "But can it be something other than a romance? Perhaps a comedy?"
"I think we could work something out," she said, obviously pleased. "Be ready in a couple of hours,"
Alone in his room, Alex forced himself to focus on unpacking, and hung up a few posters to add some life to the walls until he could paint. He was cautiously optimistic that tonight might be good for him. Perhaps such an average, danger-free activity would clear his head and give him a break from his consuming self-pity.
No, he would not be fine from now on. He was still going to struggle with his past and fret over things he could not change, but at least there were people here who cared for him. He didn't have to do this alone – although he knew he would try.
In the end, however, he was not alone. He simply needed to remember that one, simple fact. He continued to unpack his clothes.
I am not alone…
I am not alone…
I will never be alone.