Hanji never understood the stigmas against natural bodily functions. They all served a purpose, and though they didn't need to be glorified, there was no need to shy away from them. Most of them were simple itches that needed scratching.
Hunger. Thirst. Loneliness. Sometimes all three at once.
They fussed about her mind as Hanji tiptoed to the kitchen. She fumbled with a few fruits and two glasses of water before balancing them in her hands and stealing back upstairs in the dead of night. She knew this hallway by heart, counting the doors until she stood before the tiny Corporal's door with a wide grin. A ray of feeble light was visible underneath it. If she woke him up at his desk, he would whine, complain, and eventually comply to her demand of company until they both fell asleep. If by some chance he was awake, the offering would be forgotten for hushed conversation until he grew tired of her and declared it was over. Either way would entertain her and scratch the nasty itches that kept her up. So she entered.
When she saw him on the bed, hand buried deep within the boxers she had seen him wear many times before, Hanji did not yelp. She shut the door behind her.
"Hello, Levi."
He snapped up, took his hand out of his pants, and drew the bed sheets over his body, the bugle still evident.
"Get. Out."
The strained and aggravated whisper seemed to invite Hanji over. She took a seat on the end of the bed, smiling at him and offering a glass of water. His glare did not bother her, nor did his blush. This was a normal itch with a normal scratch. Placing the rejected peace offerings on the floor, she grabbed his hand.
"It's a perfectly normal bodily..."
"Get. Out."
"Are you embarrassed about your size?" Hanji leaned against the wall, her feet dangling over the edge of the bed. "Are the rumors about size and height true? It's okay, Levi." His glare was ignored again in favor of observation. "Though, I thought that when males get shocked, their erections go down. However, yours seems to have recovered or never reacted at all. Or are you immune..."
Hanji continued to mumble her own little hypotheses even after he punched her on the arm, her toes clenching and unclenching in her excitement. She smirked as his hands covered his lap, a delayed attempt at decency. He had given up on forcing her to get out by now, and instead seethed with his usual glare.
She had never put much thought into this situation. The idea that Levi Rivaille had some sort of a sex drive was not absurd, but it was an unexpected experience. Her one track mind blessed and cursed her with tenacity and concentration. It did not leave much room for the mundane and everyday thoughts of sexuality, save for the passing nights when it came bubbling out at the charge of her normally messy fingers, or when her dormant standards reminded her that Levi was an attractive human being, no matter how short he was.
To see him in this state was a scientific discovery of its own, and she intended to explore it.
"Why are you even here?"
"I wanted company." Hanji replied, wedging herself between him and the wall. He refused to move, leaving one of her legs draped over his own as her arms wrapped around his torso. "And I wanted to sleep in here again. So, if you want to finish..."
He smacked her on the head.
"Shut up, shitty glasses."
"There's nothing to be ashamed of. It's natural. If you want, I'll do it with you."
No, that wasn't what she meant. That wasn't her intention. Observation, not participation. Never mind the satisfaction of making him blush like a schoolboy. She knew her common sense could be lost to the thrill of science, but the weight of her words pulled her back to reality. Maybe this was why people became so flustered at normal body functions. Her nails dug into his side. His hands dealt with an urge that refused to subside in her presence. She buried her face into his back, hoping that he would yell at her again so she could take advantage of it and leave, taking her own desires with her.
"Hanji."
Her given name. She sat up to face him with her usual smirk.
"Are you ready?" Hanji placed her glasses on the table with a shaky hand.
"Nervous?" Levi asked. He shifted over to give Hanji proper space and poked at her shoulder. "It was your damn idea."
"No!" She huffed before placing her hands in her lap. Childish, but needed. "I'm curious about human sexuality. I've only read about it." Her nails dug into her thighs. They were warm, too warm to be normal. Arousal never came this quickly. In her experience it had always been slow and predictable, creeping up on her like lost sleep and allowing her chances to fend it off bit longer for the spare moments she allowed it. "Human sexuality, though far better documented than Titan sexuality, is still an interesting topic."
Hanji's hands fumbled with her hair tie. The idea to pull it out in one- hopefully attractive, though she didn't get her hopes up- motion was a failure. Levi pulled it out of her knots and tangles, combing through her hair for a moments out of habit. She made out a blurry smirk before she fell back into her previous position with an undignified thump. She closed her eyes. In the darkness she could still feel the heat between her legs, the pounding of her heart, Levi's eyes with their usual uninterested look going over every part of her body.
"So is it a deal? Or will I have to throw in something else?"
Levi shifted. He laid next to her, their shoulders touching and his warmth enough to make her smile. Her scientific urges blossomed once again.
"You can't hide it under a sheet, Levi. It has to be out so I can see."
Her body tensed, expecting an elbow to whack her. However, he complied, removing the sheet and pulling himself through the boxers. She allowed herself a hushed squeal. It had gone back to interesting in the most scientific way; her curiosity revived at the sight.
"If I remember correctly, the average size is about six inches. But in books it seems to be eight..." Hanji babbled on, her fingers poking at his shaft at her own leisure. It was warm and stiff, just as the books had told her. His hand laid over the tip, preventing her eager fingers from prodding at it. Eventually, he slapped her hand away.
"Oi, shitty glasses." Was he reprimanding her curiosity?
"Oh, but it's so much fun to touch. It's warm and the correlation between height and size is false. You seem to be a bit above average, but below the books." Hanji lay on her side, resting her head in her hand as toyed with him more. The flush that colored his face was enjoyable. His attempt at keeping composure was better. "Or was it between the penis and the feet? Do you think I should write this down?"
Oh, he was annoyed. Livid, but no more so than usual. His nails had found their way onto her hip and dug into her flesh, leaving crescents that would attract her attention. Once she flinched out of her babbling, Hanji tensed at his fingers creeping towards the dampness between her legs she had ignored in favor of Levi. A calloused finger poked and prodded at the nub between her legs. It was joined by another that pinched and rubbed at her sweet spot.
Thinking was Hanji's strong point. Then why was it so difficult with him doing something she had done to herself time and time before. His fingers were clumsy, slipping and prodding before regaining their position. She could do a better job. That had come with practice. He had none, and yet his clumsy hands had her whimpering and squirming as they dipped in and out of her. Perhaps it was the novelty of a new hand. Regardless, she could return the favor now that he was distracted. After some fumbling, she managed to find a grip he appreciated, his placid face now twitching along with her. Her little experiment had worked, fingers moving and thumb pressing into tip with just enough pressure to make him squirm. Huffing with satisfaction, Hanji moved forward, biting at his lower lip and tugging him towards her. She was rewarded with a kiss as his hands abandoned the place between her legs to pull her closer.
She hadn't expected him to be so adamant about kissing her. In the books she had skimmed in slight interest, this was not what she had seen. They broke off kisses to dirty their hands between their legs, not put all their might into such a sensual action as kissing. It was a lower grade of intimacy, forgotten for the act of insertion. Though... she found this just as satisfying. She indulged herself in his greedy kisses, gasping for air at the few moments he retreated to nip and bite at her neck.
"Ah, Levi, you seem to have a lot of pent up-"
He kissed her at that, clutching a handful of her hair. He could ignore her for now. She could always try this experiment again.