Hannah's P.o.v.

We walked hand in hand by the lake after dark, I looked at the person I was walking with. Draco Malfoy, my secret boyfriend. How I loved those words. Ever since we were both chosen to be prefects, we had grown closer and closer, until one night, we shared a kiss whilst on the lookout for students up past curfew. We were breaking that rule right now. This was the only time we could be together, even if there was a risk of being punished. It took me a while to realise that it was him making my heart beat so fast, and not the exhilaration of breaking the rules like I first thought. He had captured my heart as if it was the Golden Snitch, and I hoped that he would never let it go.
Now that I knew how I felt about him, I didn't want to waste a single moment. I wanted to remember every moment, every feature of his face. I wanted to know everything about him, I wanted him to turn to me and tell me everything about his life.

As if he had read my mind, Draco looked at me, and gave me that sheepish smile I knew only I had seen. I knew a different Draco from everyone else, I knew the real Draco- I knew my Draco.
We lay down under a tree, still holding hands- chatting and laughing, pointing out stars and telling the stories behind them, sharing our secret dreams and learning new things about each other. It was a perfect date- until I ruined it. I had forgotten to take my DA coin out of my pocket. Even though we aren't meeting anymore, I have a nervous habit of twirling it between my fingers, which is not a good idea when my boyfriend is still part of Inquisitorial Squad- the group responsible for making sure no-one was doing things they shouldn't, when Umbridge ran the school. They were particularly hung up on catching the members of Dumbledore's Army. Even though it was last year, and Umbridge was gone, they still wanted to find us- and mysteriously, the list of our members had vanished. The squad even knew about our coins- they show the time and date of our meetings. Luckily, they hadn't caught hold of one yet. I was twirling the coin, but unexpectedly Draco kissed my forehead. I traced his jawline, the coin still in between my fingers, when it slipped onto the cold ground.

Unfortunately Draco noticed. "What the-? Is this what I think it is?" I sat up and scrabbled for it, but Draco snatched up my coin before I could take it. "Hannah, you're part of DA? You're helping Potter? You know what he's like!" he stood up and started pacing back and forth, "Oh god, what am I going to say to my father? He'll make me drink that terrible truth serum if he finds out that I've even seen one of these, let alone dating one of the members! then what'll happen to you? I don't know if I could stand it if they hurt y-" But he suddenly yelled in pain, clutching his left arm. I stood up in horror, not sure what to do. Draco cried out again, but this time fell to his knees, his eyes watering. I rushed forward, and clutched at his arm, but he kept trying to pull me off. "Hannah, you can't help, and I'd rather you didn't see. I know what you'd think of me, and I promise I never wanted it to happen, I didn't realise what I'd have to do, I was so stupid!" he babbled. Draco took my hand in his, and looked at me with pleading grey eyes. I swept a blonde lock of hair away from his face, and cupped his face with my free hand. But I was persistent, and caught him off guard by pulling his sleeve up his arm. What I saw made me gasp in horror, and I recoiled as if I would be cursed just touching it. I wanted to scream and shout at Draco, but all that came out was a hoarse whisper.

"No. no no no. please tell me this isn't what I think it is. Please tell me it comes off. Is this some kind of sick joke? You aren't one of them. I know you. You can't be. No. no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You're not a Death Eater" that name kept rolling around and around my head- it wouldn't stop, even when I put my hands over my ears and tried to drown it out with Draco's good points. Draco himself tried to comfort me, but I slapped his hands away.
"You don't get it, do you Draco? My boyfriend has joined a group of thugs who want to kill innocent people! Anyone, anyone could be next! Do you know how scary that is? For all I know, you could be plotting to kill me right now!" Draco shuffled so that he was knelt in front of me, attempted to take my hands again, and this time I let him- but I still couldn't look him in the eye.
"Hannah please, I would never hurt you! It wasn't my fault, I swear! My father made me, and all to save his reputation!" he pulled his sleeve down in disgust. "All it's brought me is pain and fear. Every time it burns, it means that Vol- the Dark Lord wants to summon us. I'm excepted from this because otherwise people would realise what was going on, but just knowing that- that he's getting bigger and stronger, making plans all the time, it freaks the hell out of me!" Draco gripped my hands tighter, "so please Hannah, please can we just go back to the way we were? Can you please just look at me and tell me that we'll be okay?" I looked into his eyes, his shining, grey, truthful eyes, and I could see how desperate he was. Draco wasn't acting. He honestly didn't want to be a death eater. I nodded, and we kissed, but as we walked back to the school, I knew then that nothing between us would ever be the same again.

Draco's P. O.V.

I sat on the edge on my bed, my head in my hands. How could things have gone so wrong so quickly? One moment, I was telling her about my secret ambition to become an auror, a career choice my father would definitely not approve of, and the next, she was in DA, and I was a Death Eater. If only I hadn't seen that freaking coin. What was I going to do? The ministry is still giving us truth serum in case we've 'joined their alliance', and my father does it to me all the time. How would I protect Hannah? Now that I know… I could get her into so much trouble. Not many people know exactly how the ministry punish the people who disobey them. A better word for their punishment style is torture. I can't let them do that to Hannah. Hannah is the first person I've opened up to, the first person who didn't judge me, and the first person I kissed. It didn't matter to me that she's a half-blood; I think I'm actually in love with her. No, I know that I'm in love with her. I just wish I could scrub away this- this- this curse! Hannah means so much to me, it's like she sees me differently- like she sees me as the prince when everyone else thinks I'm the beast. The only reason I even know that story is because she was telling me about being half-muggle.
As the sun rose, I came to a decision. I would have to get my distance from Hannah; it's the only way to save her. The more I find out, the more she's in danger. Getting up, I bumped into her in the corridor. She looked how I felt- torn, exhausted, and unsure. I couldn't miss the sparkle in her eye as she saw me though, which made the situation so much harder. I dodged in between other early risers and stood beside her. "Will you meet me at our place after breakfast? I want to talk to you about something." She looked surprised, but thankfully still nodded, and then herded some first years into the great hall. I turned around and walked smack into Ronald Weasley. Oh great, just what I need.
"Oh, sorry… wait on second thoughts, no I'm not. It's only Malfoy! So Malfoy, killed any muggles lately?" it's always the same joke, isn't it? Since I started going out with Hannah last year, I've realised that everything I've been taught was wrong. Everything my dad has told me, I now see is cruel and unfair. Without thinking, I replied with one of the oldest jokes in the book.
"No, stolen any souls lately?" Weasley gave a sarcastic sneer, Potter rolled his eyes, but to my surprise, Granger actually gave an involuntary snort of laughter. When Weasley asked what was so funny, she masked her face, and he looked like he wanted to murder me. But I didn't have time for that. I rushed past and got to the great hall in time for an early breakfast. I couldn't eat fast enough! Bolting down the last slice of toast, I practically flew to our tree, where Hannah was already waiting. As I opened my mouth, Hannah spoke for me.
"You're breaking up with me, aren't you?" she could see straight through me. I looked at her, and I couldn't do it. I couldn't end this for risk. Our whole relationship has been based on a risk, so why not live a little and add a little more?

"I...no. I was going to ask if you wanted to stop with the secrecy. You know, go public?" the look on her face was the most amazing thing I have ever seen.
"I never thought you'd actually ask me! But wait- what about your reputation? What about your dad?" so I told her that I wasn't scared anymore, and to hell with my dad. We spent the whole of the day hanging out, wandering around the school, hand in hand, with rumours, comments, and catcalls flying all over the place- and nothing had felt better in my life. But then the night came- and nothing had felt worse. All I could hear was these little doubts telling me that I was sick, cruel, and selfish.

A few Months Later…

I feel wretched. Ever since that night by the lake, I've sat up, night after night, regretting this situation, wishing that I'd stood up to my father before it was too late. The little time I spent asleep was filled with my father's disappointing glare, and him. I can't stand it! I wish they'd just vanish! When I woke up, the sun was just peeking over the horizon; so I used the spare time to write in an old notebook I had turned into a journal, and simply wrote one line.

'I don't know who I am anymore.'

Hannah's P.O.V.

I'm so stupid, and I hate Herbology. I never understand anything we're being taught, I'm so going to fail my N.E.W.T s. At that moment, Filch came into the classroom, handed Professor Sprout a letter and hobbled away again with that stupid cat at his heels. She nodded to herself and walked over to me.
"Hannah, dear, you've got to report to the Headmaster's office right away. You're not in trouble, but don't worry about the homework." She was being extremely nice to me, which worried me just a bit. As I stood up, my chair scraped back, and all heads turned to look at me. I kept my head down and gathered my stuff as fast as possible. Leaving the classroom, I hurried along the corridors and tried to avoid Peeves's ink pellet missiles. Thanks Peeves. As I attempted to wipe the ink from my robes, I reached the Gargoyles outside Professor Dumbledore's office.
"Um, I don't know the password, but I have this note." I held it out, but I also felt extremely stupid. To my surprise, one actually responded.
"We've been told to allow you in. go straight up." They leapt aside, and the stone stairs inside started revolving. Hesitantly at first, I stepped on and walked to the top. Another one of my not-so-good ideas. I got dizzier and dizzier, and I practically fell out at the top. There was a faint chuckle and someone helped me up. I thanked Dumbledore and tried not to blush! I have never been more embarrassed in my life.
"Yes, those stairs catch me off guard sometimes too. Now Hannah, please, have a seat. I have some important news for you that I wish I didn't have to give." Uh oh, that doesn't sound good. Is it my grades? Am I being kicked out of Hogwarts? Am I really that stupid?
Maybe that's why professor Sprout excused me from the homework. I nodded to indicate that he should carry on, and scrutinised his face- he looked so serious and sad that it scared me.
"I have been informed that regrettably, the group that call themselves the Death Eaters have struck again, and unfortunately, it was your mother who was the mark of their evil doings. I am sorry to say that, her life was snatched from her, Hannah. She was an extremely brave woman. Now, we need to make arrangements…"

But I wasn't listening anymore. The room started spinning again, faster and faster, until everything went black…

Draco's P.o.v.

A paper aeroplane flew into the classroom and landed on my desk. Finally, a way out of this black hole of boredom. I unfolded it, and recognised the writing immediately. It was Granger's calligraphy. Far too many loops for me, but I decoded it anyway.

For Draco Malfoy's eyes only.
Hannah's been taken to the hospital wing. I'm usually not one to eavesdrop, but I overheard Professor McGonagall and Professor Dumbledore discussing it. Apparently, something has happened to her mum and she blacked out when they told her. She's in shock and they can't get her to respond to anything they say to her. You need to get to her soon, maybe you can calm her down.
Hurry!
Sincerely,
Hermione Granger.

Hannah's in the hospital wing? That was enough to get me to hurry! Who cares about a boring lesson when Hannah is sat in the hospital wing, scared and alone? Ignoring the bellows of my teachers, I grabbed everything and ran out. I thundered up the stairs, and burst into the hospital wing. Madame Pomfrey whipped around, and I knew I was going to be in trouble, but spotting Hannah in the corner of the room I sped over to her. She was staring into space, not focusing on me. I called her name, kissed her hands, and even sang a verse of her favourite song (some muggle song from an animated movie about toys.) but to no avail. She just wasn't responding. That's when Madame Pomfrey bustled over.
"Hmm, I should really turn you out for charging in like that, because I have patients who are in need of rest, you know. But, I can see that this is an urgent case- and she can still hear you. Just talk to her, maybe something you say will snap her out of this trance." I cleared my throat and then paused, unsure of what to say to Hannah whilst in front of Madame Pomfrey. She took the hint and strode down the wing to a Potter wannabe who took a bludger to the head. I still hesitated, but took her hand and finally got up the courage to speak.
"Hannah? It's me, Draco. Are you okay? Oh wait, stupid question. Well, I hope you get well soon… What happened to you? Granger told me it was something to do with your mum, but-"
a sudden sting to my cheek and loud noise told me that I had just been slapped. When I turned back around, all I could see is the hurt and anger on Hannah's face. She was hurt and angry… at me.

"HOW DARE YOU ACT LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW?! My mother died, at the hands of your- your friends! You and your kind caused this to happen! I bet that's why you wanted us to go public, so people wouldn't think it was you! Well, you thought wrong, because I know it was you. I hate you Draco Malfoy! I HATE YOU!" with that she burst into tears, painful, heart-wrenching sobs- and each one widened the crack in my heart. How could she even think that I'd do such a thing? I wanted to tell her, promise her anything, so long as she'd believe me. But Madame Pomfrey pushed me aside and gave Hannah a calming draught. Then she rounded on me and ordered me to leave. I couldn't take my eyes off of Hannah though, so Madame Pomfrey escorted me out. What do I do now?

I trailed miserably back to the dormitory and sat on the window ledge. What was the point in going to lessons? Why try? It's crystal clear that I'm never going to be an Auror, especially not with him around. I've lost everything. I gave up most of my soul just being initiated. The rest was gone when I lost Hannah. I hate the way my mum looks at me now. It's like I've died, and she's lost her son. which in a way, I guess she has. I'm on a clear cut path to my death, and every day I let this happen to me is another step towards my final destination. I have to stop it, I have to break out and, and, and make my own path! no matter what the consequences, I'm going to do something- I can't die this way.

I know what I have to do.

Hannah's P.O.V

I can't believe that today's my last day at Hogwarts. I was released from the hospital wing yesterday, and I have a full day to say my goodbyes. All packing took was a couple of flicks of a wand, but saying goodbye would be so hard. Everyone had heard by now, and they kept giving me pitying looks. I had to take food up to the girls dormitory just to get some peace. Susan was up there, and she actually cried when she said goodbye. I saved Ernie until last, and when I promised to keep in touch, he shed a few tears too. But I couldn't cry. I was crying an ocean of tears in my head, but not a single drop of my sadness fell, so no-one could see what I was feeling inside. At least, not until I found the letter.
It was just sitting there, on my pillow, and i have no idea how it got there. I shoved it in my trunk, and got ready to leave, but I couldn't get it out of my head. my brain told me a million reasons why I shouldn't open it, but I did anyway, and I'm actually really glad I read it.

Hannah,
I've come to a decision. I can't do this any more. I can't be one of them.
When I found out about your mum, I was so angry. The fact that you thought I had known about it, let alone be part of it (not that I'm blaming you) well, I felt sick to my stomach. Seeing you hurting like that in the hospital wing- it's really opened my eyes. so thank you.
But also, I needed to tell you that I have to get away.
I don't know whether you broke up with me in the hospital wing, or whether you were just mad, but either way, you have to say that we aren't going out any more.
People know that we went out. After I do what I have to do- he will try to find anyone I'm connected to as a way to lure me in.
I'm going to leave their group. The chances are that I will end up dead, but I can't take that risk with you.
I Love you.
D x
P.s. Before you leave, could you please meet me in our place? It would mean the world to me, but I understand if you don't want to.

Of course I'm going to meet him.

Draco's P.o.v.

our last day together was perfect. Hannah met me half an hour after breakfast, so we had until curfew (which was when she was leaving) to be together. We were lying under our tree, with my arm around her shoulders- just like we were when everything fell apart. But today we fixed it. We talked, and I promised that if I was still alive when he was brought down, then I'd come and find her, that I'd search the globe for her if needed. As we said goodbye, I kissed her. I don't know how, but the three most important words I would ever say slipped out of my mouth.
"I love you."
But I will never forget what she said afterwards. No-one will be able to take that memory from me, no matter how strong the spell.
"I love you too."