Youth was a lie.

And everything that involved the essence of youth were merely things that made an intricate web of dishonesty and imitation. He wasn't sure why he had succumbed to doing a very youthful thing that was part hypocritical to his newly found philosophy and part pure embarrassing.

Maybe it was the coffee…

Yes, Hikigaya Hachiman had just done something that he wasn't proud of. No, proud wasn't the word. If anything, he would have been satisfied with only not being proud of himself.

He, Hikigaya Hachiman, had just confessed to someone. Namely Orimoto Kaori.

He could just imagine the shock and gasp of imaginary people peering into his life. Even thinking about his dumb mistake – the muffled laughter of Orimoto and her friends flashed through his mind – made him flush a deeper set of red and ground himself deeper into his bland bed. Hoping that the sheets and mattress would just eat him up and be done with whatever shame he was going through now.

Sadly, he was still there, cursing to whatever deity thought it was fun to give the creepy loner the courage to confess. He could swear some sadistic god or goddess was laughing at his misery addled with embarrassment.

God, he wished he would die right then and there.

In that moment, Hikigaya felt his phone vibrate through his pocket. Someone was calling him. Odd, considering he had no friends who could be calling him. It was probably Komachi asking what he wanted for dinner.

Komachi you really are the brightest light in my life.

Hachiman didn't bother reading the caller id and went on to answer his phone. "Komachi, I'm right upstairs-"

"Hikigaya?" The voice from the phone cut him off. It was a girl but he couldn't recognize the voice.

"Uh…who's this?"

"Seriously Hikigaya?" The voice giggled. "You just confessed to me like an hour ago"

His dead eyes widened in surprised, as he rushed into a seating position, which caused inertia to make him tumble to the ground and fall face first.

"Hikigaya? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Perfectly fine" He groaned through the pain.

"Are you busy? Should I call back later?"

"NO!" Hikigaya answered, albeit a bit too loudly. "I mean no, so what's up?"

Hikigaya mentally face palmed at himself. What's up? You clearly know what's up you stupid idiot. This was no time to act aloof. Hey, this is a great opportunity, he can do damage control while he was at it.

"What's up?" She laughed. "You can do better than that Hikigaya"

Oh Hikigaya really couldn't handle her voice. Her laugh was making his heart beat a million miles per second. "Sorry" He apologized meekly.

"Don't be, it's kind of cute, in a dorky kind of way"

Hachiman was really lucky that Orimoto wasn't there in person to see his face light up like Rudolph's nose. He really did not know where this conversation was going.

"So…" He nervously chuckled, "Why'd you call?"

"Hello, weren't you the one that ran off after you just confessed to me?"

"I-I uh… but you… laugh…me" He tried to explain.

"Oh!" She said in realization. "You've got it wrong. We were just talking about how guys nowadays don't have the guts to, well, ask a girl out directly when you came. So we just laughed. I swear we weren't laughing at you"

It felt like the weight of a thousand stars disappeared from Hikigaya's chest. Wait so that means?

"So what you're saying is…?" Hikigaya waited for an answer.

"Oh about the confession? I'm not accepting it"

Okay a thousand suns, please come back to my disappointed chest.

"…but I'm also not rejecting it" She continued.

Please go away disappointment. "I'm not the kind to just reject someone without knowing what kind of person he is. Besides, you were kind of brave, so I got to give credit for that" She giggled.

"So…"

"This Sunday" She cut him off. "There's this new café opening up and I really want to check it out"

"Uh" Was the only thing Hikigaya could say.

"And Hikigaya, ask me out properly next time okay?"

"Uh"

"You're hilarious Hikigaya. See you at school" Then the phone went dead.

"Uh"

Hikigaya let his phone fall from his hand to the ground. He couldn't care less if it broke from the fall. Because now, Hikigaya felt like he was on cloud nine. He fell back into his bed with a warm feeling in his chest. He kept recollecting the conversation with Orimoto and pinching himself to make sure this wasn't a cruel dream.

It wasn't.

Oh good god it wasn't.

…

Hikigaya Hachiman spent the whole week following the phone call being, well, optimistic. Which Komachi noted was creepy.

How dare you rain on my happy mood Komachi? Aren't you happy that your brother's happy?

It wasn't like Hikigaya was going in this thing blindfolded. He knew that society tends not to be merciful, particularly to people like him. Being happy was no reason for him to be slack in his wariness.

When Hachiman reached the aforementioned café, he did his absolute best to make sure that this – whatever it was - was not a prank.

He wore normal clothes, to make sure he did not look too ready for the date.

His hair was slightly unkempt, to give an air of nonchalance.

No flowers or presents as an invisible buffer, to just reduce embarrassment.

He didn't even bring that much money, only enough for a one man meal. In case it becomes a very deliberate mugging.

Damn, He really was thinking into this too much for comfort.

Orimoto didn't arrive after around half an hour, which was enough for Hachiman to successfully check the premise that there was no one he knew from school.

"Why are you sweaty Hikigaya?" She tilted her head in slight confusion.

"I… uh" It was very difficult to think clearly when Orimoto was right in front of him, especially now since Orimoto was out of school clothing. She looked pretty enough to make his throat dry up.

Thinking nothing about it Orimoto went inside which Hikigaya followed promptly.

It wasn't surprising that the café was filled to the brim. The café did just open and people in this town were the type to hype about something new and dump it a couple of weeks later.

The life cycle of trendiness.

However what did surprise Hachiman was that he had a wonderful experience. Orimoto didn't seem to mind his non-interactivity. The way she brought herself gradually made Hachiman lost his social anxiousness, however little the loss was it was still progress. She asked simple questions that didn't bring awkwardness to the table. It certainly made up for the lackluster café pastries.

The 'date' so well that Hachiman expected his cake to explode and a camera crew would tape his reaction through the shop windows. And thus ending any hope of any social relationships with anyone ever again.

But the cake never exploded, and a camera crew never came. And so, Hikigaya Hachiman inadvertently smiled to the girl in front of him.

Orimoto caught the smile. "Enjoying yourself, Hikigaya?" She gave a smile of her own.

Flustered, Hikigaya averted his gaze. "It's nothing… I mean… I enjoy"

"Relax Hikigaya, I won't bite you" She giggled.

Hachiman took a deep breath. "Thank you" He looked at her, "For giving me this opportunity"

Orimoto was slightly taken aback on how genuine Hikigaya sounded when he said that. She couldn't fight her own smile from forming. "No problem Hikigaya"

"Say Hikigaya" Orimoto fiddled with her coffee. "Since you did confessed to me"

The moment Hachiman heard the word, his eyes darted around in any direction but hers. "Ah yes, that thing"

"Yes that thing" she chuckled at his patent timidity. She rested her cheek on her palm. "About that, what do you like about me Hikigaya?"

Hachiman's mind went on full blank at the question. Why did he like her? All the answers that came to his mind were desperately shallow and dull. It was at this point that Hikigaya realized that he didn't know much about the girl in front of her. His confession was as shallow as his infatuation to her.

Hikigaya tried to think of something. Anything to say to her. But his words died as fast as the ideas came.

Orimoto gave an amused expression.

"And that's why I can't accept your confession Hikigaya"

His shoulders slumped in embarrassment at the realization. Orimoto brought up a good logical point. He didn't know anything about her and vice versa.

Hikigaya was about to apologize for wasting her time and leave the café before she said something that made him stop.

"But, If you can answer that question by the time we're done with middle school, then I might reconsider" She gave one of the most mischievous grins that he had ever seen before. A sight which somehow reminded him of his Komachi whenever she wanted something from his dear old brother.

"C'mon Hikigaya, let's go see a movie"

With that, Hikigaya was dragged by the sleeve by the girl that gave her a chance.

Middle school was going to end in one and a half year, and he was going to make sure that he spent every available moment getting to know her. After all, if she took a chance on him, why couldn't he take a chance on this?

…

A year has passed since Hachiman's first date with Orimoto and he'd be lying if he said it had been uneventful.

First of all, Orimoto was very interactive with him, inside and out of school. Anyone would have thought that Orimoto would limit seeing him to a minimum since the masses did consider him a loner, one of his many nicknames.

Apparently Orimoto did everything in her power to completely abolish Hachiman's wayward status as a lone wolf. It wasn't noticeable at first of course. It came in subtle steps, like introducing him to a set of guy friends. Well, more like he was forced to interact with them.

Or unknowingly signing him up for the school's baseball team, which he embarrassingly failed for the first couple practices because one he knew nothing of baseball and two, he had the lung capacity of a five year old.

Or bringing him around and introducing him to her circle of friends whenever she hung out.

A cluster of small little things that balled up into a big end result.

He could safely say now his life as a social pariah went and gone like winter flakes in spring. Not that he was complaining. However he did sometimes miss his alone time on weekends.

"Hikigaya! C'mon, you don't want to be late to practice again" One of his club members shouted.

The voice of his friend brought him out of his musings. "Yeah, yeah. I'll be right down"

Packing up his bags, he couldn't argue the fact at how ironic everything was right now. He, Hikigaya Hachiman, having a social life. What were the odds? Well he really couldn't have done anything without a certain someone.

"Good work everyone!" The team captain shouted.

Another day another strenuous practice. He really couldn't understand his unfathomable need to continue attending baseball. It was probably his pride that disallowed him to yield to the challenge. Or the sense of comraderies that it gave off. Or maybe the fact that even though Kaori did sign him up for the baseball club without his consent mind you, he didn't want to disappoint the girl that changed his life.

"Hikigaya, your girlfriend's here" One of his friends said out loud.

Speak of the devil. He turned his head in blatant joy, like how a cat would after hearing the crumple of cat food. This soon followed by a string of laughter, making his face flustered up.

"S-shut up guys, she's not my girlfriend" Hikigaya tried to save face, but the stuttering did not help one bit.

"Sure lover boy"

Hikigaya quickly packed his stuff, and practically ran to Orimoto.

…

Hikigaya Hachiman is still as anxious as he was with Orimoto as he did a year ago. He would have thought he would be over getting nervous every time he was alone with her, which he recalled now, was a lot. He felt stupid being smitten with the little things about her, like for example the way her curly brown hair would bob at each step.

Not that he was always staring at her. That would be creepy. He certainly wasn't staring at her. Not one bit.

"Hey Hikigaya" Hikigaya quickly averted his gaze to the ground before Orimoto managed to realize Hikigaya was staring. "Want to stop by somewhere first?"

"S-sure"

In hindsight, it was probably a bad idea making a detour on their way home after his practice. He wasn't in the best of state, and he was pretty sure he smelled bad. It was either Orimoto was too nice to bring it up or she didn't notice the musky scent.

They stopped by a convenience store, which Hikigaya was a bit thankful for. Any other place and he would have been a teeny bit self-conscious about his smell.

Orimoto went straight for the magazine section while Hikigaya browsed the drinks. As he was contemplating on which version of Maxx coffee he would get, the giggles of girls caught his attention.

They were whispering with each other as they made not so subtle glances at his direction.

Girls were frightening creatures. A single one of them could make you sweat and do stupid stuff, but a group of them could do even worse than that.

I know I look weird but you don't need to laugh at me like that.

Making his choice of drink, he went to Kaori's side as fast as he could. It seem to do the trick as they seem to lose interest and went back to whatever they were doing.

He breathed out a sigh of relief.

"Don't tease them Hikigaya" The voice of Kaori Orimoto nearly startled him.

He furrowed his eyebrows. "Excuse me? I assure I did nothing to them. They were the ones that laughed at me first"

Orimoto gave a sideway glance. "Girls don't like it when you don't show interest Hikigaya"

"How is that relevant?"

Orimoto mocked a thinking pose. "Nothing, I'm just glad you're dense sometimes"

"I'll just pretend that I get what you're talking about"

She chuckled "Oh that's rich coming from the guy that struggled to say a complete sentence to me last year"

His face went red. She really got him there.

She found his embarrassed expression very endearing. "By the way Hikigaya" She picked up another magazine. "Where are you planning to go to high school?"

Getting over his flustered state, Hikigaya answered. "I'm planning on Sobu"

"Sobu huh?"

"Yeah, it's closer to home, and Komachi would probably like it if I came home earlier than her"

"What a sis-con" She expressed.

"Hey" Hikigaya pouted.

"So, we're going our separate ways aren't we?"

Hikigaya never really entertained with the thought, but it was sure an inevitability that they would separate. As far as he knew, he was the one guy in his school going to Sobu. Which was saddening while exciting at the same time.

"You know Hikigaya" He could hear the solemn change in her voice. "You don't need to keep chasing…this"

"What are you talking about?" He inquired.

"I mean, you're going off to a new school. Meet new friends. You'll meet someone new…" Her voice trailed off.

Oh.

God damn it Hikigaya. This is your fault. No one else's. Your own stupid nincompoop fault. He couldn't blame Orimoto for acting like this. She was the only one initiating every interaction between them. It was logical to think that he, along the way, might have lost interest in her. But she was wrong, Hikigaya Hachiman was just a coward sometimes. But today, wouldn't be one of those days.

"Kaori" It felt weird saying her first name just like that. Weird in a good way. She turned to face him, eyes widened in slight surprise at hearing him say her first name.

"I like you" They maintained eye contact. "I like how you're so considerate of me. Even though I feel like I don't deserve it sometimes."

She stepped in closer. "More"

"I like how you're so observant to the people around you. I like how you took the time to help me with my problems"

Closer. "Anything else?"

"I like how you took a chance on a stupid guy like me. I like how your smile makes my heart beat fast. I like how your hair lines up perfectly with your-"

"With my what?"

"With your lips" He finished.

Orimoto cover her mouth. At first Hikigaya thought she was about to cry.

"Orimoto" He regarded her with worry.

But apparently, she was stifling a laugh. Which made Hikigaya tilt his head in confusion.

"I'm sorry" She said as she tried to control her laughter. "I mean who thought you to talk like that?"

It was now that he realized that he was being made fun of. "You did, Orimoto"

"Then I created a monster then"

Hikigaya frowned, he had just bared his heart towards Orimoto and she just laughed at them like it was a joke. He was about to just leave right then and there, when Orimoto suddenly leaned in.

Hikigaya's eyes widened in surprise. Orimoto was kissing him. She was kissing him. Right at the lips. Her lips tasted like cinnamon and god he didn't thought that cinnamon could be an addicting taste.

She separated herself from the kiss. "Took you long enough Hikigaya"

Slack jawed, Hikigaya really couldn't find a good response to that. "Uh"

"Hilarious Hikigaya" She giggled. "Let's go pay for your drink"

And just like that. Hikigaya's one year confession was complete.

…

Middle school ended sooner than Hikigaya would have liked, with him achieving his choice of high school and Orimoto heading off to a different high school. It was a sad thing, but the fact that the Kaihin High school wasn't that far off from his school made up for it, if only a bit.

Today was the first day of High school, and he swore that he was going to make his first day a memorable experience. New friends, new school, new experiences. It was an exciting prospect.

Checking his reflection on the mirror one last time, Hikigaya made sure nothing was out of place before he received a text from Orimoto…his err, girlfriend. Wow, even after more than half a year in a relationship, calling Orimoto his girlfriend was still an unbelievable concept.

'Good morning Hachi, it's the first day of school today, make sure you don't die on my account"

And a few more laughing emoticons.

Hikigaya rolled his eyes and sent a text of the same nature.

He felt really good about today as he stepped out of the house with his bike. The soft breeze of air that hit his face, the sun shining as the birds chirped. He just had a good feeling.

An hour later, Hikigaya Hachiman was involved in an accident.