Jacob laid in bed that night. He was just so confused. Why was it Edward cared about his feelings at all. It was weird every time he saw Edward on those nights, he was...always so loving. He was gentle and he acted like he cared.

And yet afterwards when they met during the day. It was like nothing ever happened, and he was the exact opposite. Jacob never really minded...he almost preferred it that way.

But...the fact that on those nights Edward acted that way was what confused him. He let out another sigh.

This was stressing him out "God~," he groaned. He closed his eyes. But his mind went right back to the subject.

This just wasn't right...they shouldn't be doing this..right? It was..it just wasn't right. After all wasn't it unfair to Bella? Jacob wondered suddenly why it was that Edward did that, if he was still in love with Bella.

He groaned again opening his eyes. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep tonight if this kept going on.

Jacob stood up and walked out from his room. Trying to be as quiet as possible as he opened the door.

He walked off the porch and looked at the forest before him. He took a deep breath, he wasn't sure why this made him nervous.

It might have been because Jacob might have secretly..enjoyed the attention Edward gave him.

But it wasn't like Jacob would admit that out loud. It was just that ever since Edward had started doing that...it had been a way to get rid of the pain Jacob felt.

He shook his head slightly, "No..this has to be done." He nodded and started off into the run.

...

As Jacob ran to the usual spot he ran over what he was going to say.

/I have to tell him this has to stop. But..I almost don't want it to stop. No no god come on Jacob this isn't right! Not for me or Bella./

Jacob found himself in an argument with himself. Almost trying to convince himself that this had to end. Jacob just hoped he'd have enough guts to do it once he got there.

Jacob finally came to a stop in the small area. It was odd that Edward always knew when he came here. But he did somehow and it was no different tonight.

Edward having sensed Jacob's presence stepped out into the clearing. He looked at the boy and was slightly surprised to see he wasn't crying.

Because when Jacob came here he was usually crying.

"Jacob what are you doing out here so late?" he asked walking over to him. Wondering what other reason he had for being here.

Edward lifted his hand up to the wolf's face, touching his cheek with the backs of his fingers.

"Is something wrong?" he asked. Jacob felt himself melting under the touch. But the guilty feeling returned.

He turned his head slightly stepping back. "No, don't." he said.

Edward blinked but lowered his hand. "Okay." he said looking at him. Jacob appeared to be nervous..or at least distressed about something.

Jacob looked down. This had seemed like a good idea before..but now he wasn't sure if he could go through with it.

"What is it?" Edward asked. After all this was unusual, normally Jacob was crying and Edward would do what he normally did. But this time Jacob seemed different he didn't even want Edward to touch him.

"Edward..we can't keep doing this." Jacob said looking down.

"What do you mean?" he asked. Jacob took another breath.. he had to do this.

"I mean..we can't do this anymore. It's not right Edward." Edward stepped forward looking seemingly concerned now.

"What's so wrong about it?" he asked. Jacob opened his mouth his eyes searching the ground. No words seemed to come out of his mouth though. Edward looked down at him.

He lifted his hand up taking the others chin and tilting his head up. "Look at me." Edward said. Jacob hesitantly looked over at him. He never pictured it being this hard to do.

/No come on I can't back down now..this has to be done. It has to be done./

Jacob repeated this in his head hoping it would bring him some sort of confidence.

"It's..just not right Edward. We shouldn't be doing this in the first place." Jacob said. His eyes looking away from Edward's again. "I mean you act this way to me when we see each other like this. But every other time it's like these nights don't ever happen."

Edward looked deeply into Jacob's eyes seeing the inner conflict. And hearing it in his mind.

"But it's just not right..your dating Bella. It's not fair to her if we do this. And its not fair to me either." Jacob felt his throat tightening. "It doesn't even make any sense. To be like this with me on these nights."

Jacob felt his throat tighten again he felt his words die in his throat again. "Jacob," Edward said softly. Jacob almost winced at this voice. He closed his eyes almost painfully.

/God I can't do this...I don't know how to do this. But I can't keep doing this./

"Jacob," Edward said again.

"Stop.." Jacob heard himself say in an almost whisper. He opened his eyes again to find tears running down his face. Great this was just what he needed.

Edward leaned forward moving his hand to the side of the boys face. "Jacob," he said again wondering why the boy was pushing himself so much. He leaned closer to the boys face. Jacob leaned back.

"No," Jacob said. Edward stared at him.

"What do you want Jacob?" he asked. Jacob was so confused right now. He knew this was wrong that they needed to stop. But part of him didn't want it to. He let out a distressed noise. Torn between the two choices.

"I-I don't want this," he said. Edward looked down at him stroking his cheek with his thumb.

"You say that but your mind says otherwise." he said gently. "I want to know what you want..do you really want me to stop?" he asked.

Jacob let out a whimper feeling the older teens touch. This was never supposed to be so hard.

"I don't know what I want anymore," he said letting out sob.

"Hey hey Jacob it's alright," he said softly not wanting him to cry. Jacob choked slightly.

"No its not okay this is anything but okay dammit."

"Shhh shh it's okay," Edward continued to speak soothingly to the younger boy. "Jacob, trying to stop this seems to be hurting you more." Edward pointed out.

"Edward..I-I can't keep doing this behind her back," he said trembling. "Don't you get that you can't have us both?" Jacob asked looking up at him.

Edward found himself silent for once.

"I can't keep doing this knowing your in love with Bella...I can't."

Edward wanted to say something to comfort him..but wasn't sure what to say. Jacob looked at him. But knew that Edward didn't have anything to reply with.

Jacob leaned up kissing him before stepping away from his touch. No matter how painful it felt to do so.

"I won't," he said and ran off in the other direction.

Leaving Edward to stand there.

TBC

yes i wrote a sequel this is going to basically have jacob trying to stop from seeing edward in that way...but as if im goign to let it stay that way lol review